拖延症 [视频]

我产生这个节目的想法，是因为我 literally 在拖延写一篇播客节目的大纲。

I got the idea for this episode because I was quite literally procrastinating writing an outline for a podcast episode.

我当时没有想出任何主题。

I didn't have an idea for a topic.

我没有足够的精力坐下来进行头脑风暴，所以我就拖延了。

I didn't have the mental energy to sit down and brainstorm, and so I was procrastinating.

虽然有点打破第四面墙，但我确实花了不少时间坐下来构思我的播客节目内容。

Not to break the fourth wall, but I do spend a decent amount of time sitting down and building out a concept for my podcast episodes.

因为如果我不这么做，我会跑题太多，最后根本无法得出任何结论。

Because if I don't, I go off on too many unnecessary tangents, and I never come to any sort of conclusion.

我确实需要一点条理，否则节目就会一团糟。

I do need a little bit of organization or else the episode is just a mess.

所以不管怎样，我很庆幸这周是拖延周，因为我觉得这个话题很重要。

So anyway, I'm actually glad that I'm having a procrastination week this week because I do think that this is an important topic.

我的意思是，每个人都会遇到拖延的问题。

I mean, everyone struggles with procrastination.

有时，人类的处境仿佛就是一场与拖延的永恒斗争。

And at times, the human condition can feel like this constant fight against procrastination.

我真觉得生活有时就是一场巨大的拖延之战，因为我们总有很多必须完成的事情。

I literally feel like life sometimes is just one big battle against procrastination because we constantly have things that we need to do.

同时，我们又有太多更有趣、更轻松、更愉快的事情更想去做。

And simultaneously, we have so many things that we'd rather be doing that are more fun, more lighthearted, more enjoyable.

生活也是一场内心的持续斗争。

Life is also a constant battle in one's mind.

我们不断提醒自己，必须先完成工作，才能享受娱乐。

We're constantly having to remind ourselves that we have to get the work done before we can have our play.

你知道吗？

You know?

拖延的问题不仅在于我们无法完成应做的事，从而带来压力和后果，还会影响我们看待自己的方式。

And the thing about procrastination is that not only does it cause stress because we don't get things done that we need to get done, and there's usually consequences for that, but also it can impact the way that we see ourselves.

比如，它会影响我们的自尊。

Like, it can impact our self esteem.

这是一件非常糟糕的事情，从来不会有好结果。

It's quite a nasty thing that never it never ends well.

它会带来很多痛苦。

It causes a lot of distress.

拖延就是这样。

Procrastination does.

所以我很高兴我们正在讨论它。

And so I'm glad we're talking about it.

因为说实话，拖延是很多人都只是模糊理解的事情。

Because to be honest, procrastination is something that a lot of us just vaguely understand.

我们知道我们自己会拖延，但并不一定完全明白为什么会拖延，或者如何停止拖延。

It's something that we know we do, but we don't necessarily fully understand why we do it or how we can stop doing it.

我认为，很多人忙于在拖延的状态中挣扎，以至于没有时间退一步问问自己：我们为什么拖延？

I think a lot of us are so busy struggling in this state of procrastination that we don't take the time to step back and ask ourselves, why are we procrastinating?

这里发生了什么？

What's happening here?

我们为什么无法完成某件事？

Why are we unable to get something done?

也就是说，这个问题的根本原因是什么？

Like, what's the root cause of the issue?

我认为，学习如何管理某件事的第一步是充分理解它是什么。

I think the first step to learning how to manage something is to fully understand what it is.

所以，我会向你们分享拖延的定义。

So I will share with you the definition of procrastination.

拖延是指明知会有负面后果，却仍无必要且自愿地延迟或推迟某事的行为。

Procrastination is the act of unnecessarily and voluntarily delaying or postponing something despite knowing that there will be negative consequences for doing so.

我认为这里一个常被忽视的关键细节是，只有当拖延带来负面后果时，它才构成拖延。

I think the key detail here that might normally go unnoticed would be that procrastination only exists if there are negative consequences for doing so.

就我个人而言，我认为我的拖延程度属于平均水平。

Personally, I would say I have a very average rate of procrastination.

我觉得我并没有比普通人拖延得更多，但我也绝不认为自己比普通人拖延得少。

I don't feel like I procrastinate more than the average person, but I definitely don't think I procrastinate less than the average person.

我觉得自己正好在中间位置。

Like, I would say I'm right in the middle.

我处于平均水平，因为我确实经常拖延，但还没到拖延到控制我生活、毁掉我生活的地步。

I'm right at the average because I do procrastinate relatively frequently, but I don't procrastinate to a point where it controls my life and ruins my life.

我仍然能把事情做完。

I still do get things done.

我几乎总是能按时完成生活中需要完成的任务。

I almost always meet the deadlines I need to meet for things in my life.

我想我的意志力还算不错。

I have a decent enough sense of willpower, I guess.

你知道，我大概有80%的时间能勉强逼自己克服拖延感，以便在需要时把事情做完。

You know, I can sort of push myself through feelings of procrastination probably 80% of the time in order to get things done when I need to get them done.

但有时候拖延会占上风，导致我没能完成该做的事。

But there are times that it gets the best of me, and I don't get the shit done that I need to get done.

这会带来后果，而且真的很糟糕。

And there are consequences, and it's awful.

但我认为我是讨论这个话题的合适人选，因为我确实觉得自己处于平均水平。

But I would say I'm a good person to discuss this topic because I do think I'm right at the average amount.

你知道的？

You know?

所以我发现我自己在几种不同的情境下会拖延。

So I find I personally procrastinate in a few different scenarios.

比如，我生活中有一些反复出现的诱因让我拖延。

Like, I have repeating offenders in my life that cause me to procrastinate.

第一，当我有一个需要长时间坐着工作的任务时。

Number one, when I have a task to do that will require me sitting and working for a long period of time.

我的意思是，这很普遍。

I mean, this is universal.

但要坐下来，不受干扰，全身心投入完成一项任务，需要很强的自律。

But it takes discipline to sit down with no distractions and to dedicate yourself to completing a task.

这需要大量的自律，有时候你就是缺乏这样做的动力。

It takes a lot of discipline, and there are times when you don't have the motivation to do that.

有时候我更愿意到户外去。

There are times when I'd rather be outside.

我更愿意去海滩之类的地方。

I'd rather be at the beach or something.

我更愿意在外面慢跑一会儿。

I'd rather be on a little jog outside.

我更愿意沐浴在阳光下。

I'd I'd rather be in the sun.

这在夏天尤其具有挑战性。

This is especially challenging during the summer.

但也有时候我更愿意坐在桌前网购、刷Instagram、Pinterest之类的。

But there are also times when I'd rather be sitting at my desk online shopping or on Instagram or on Pinterest or something.

比如，有时候我宁愿把坐着的时间用来做别的事情。

Like, there are times when I would much rather use my sitting time to do something else.

长时间专注于一项任务确实需要一定程度的意志力，特别是当你知道这会花费很长时间时，尤其具有挑战性。

It does take a level of mental strength to dedicate yourself to a task for a long time, and it's especially challenging when you know that it's gonna take a while.

有一项任务需要你坐下来工作三十分钟，这是一回事。

It's one thing to have a task that will require you to sit and work for, like, thirty minutes.

但当你知道手头的任务要花四个小时、五个小时，甚至可能三天时，就会显得更加令人望而却步，也更难开始着手。

But when you know that you have a task on your plate that's gonna take four hours, five hours, maybe even three days, it's much more daunting, and it's much more challenging to even get started.

所以我发现，我最常拖延的就是这类事情。

So I find I procrastinate these types of things probably the most.

当一项任务需要太多思考时，我也会拖延。

I also procrastinate when a task requires too much thinking.

我通常不担心完成那些无聊的任务。

I don't tend to have a problem finishing mindless tasks.

比如，如果一项任务不需要太多脑力，我就没什么问题能把它做完。

Like, if a task requires little brainpower, I have no problem getting it done.

我会立刻把它做完。

I'll get it done immediately.

即使耗时，只要有点无聊，我就能做完？

Even if it's time consuming, if it's somewhat mindless, I can I can get it done?

没关系。

It's fine.

但当某件事需要一定程度的分析或思考才能完成时，这需要我投入特定的精神状态。

But when something requires a level of analysis or a level of contemplation in order to be completed, that requires a certain headspace from me.

为了处理这样的任务，我必须保持清醒。

In order to work on a task like that, I have to be sharp.

我必须全神贯注。

I have to be on my a game.

我必须休息充足。

I have to be well rested.

我必须处于一种完美的状态，才能让这样的任务变得轻松、有趣、顺畅而出色。

I have to be in this perfect place in order for a task like that to be easy and fun and seamless and great.

但事实上，在生活中，我们很少能处于那种精力充沛、心情良好、一切顺利、精神强大的完美状态。

But the truth is, in life, we're rarely in that perfect place where we have lots of energy, and we're in a good mood, and all is going well, and we feel mentally strong.

因为这种感觉并不是我们能时刻拥有的。

Like, that's not a feeling that we get to experience 100% of the time.

我们可能只有40%到50%的时间能感受到那种状态。

We maybe experience that feeling 40% of the time, 50% of the time.

我几乎总是被某些事情困扰，被某些事情耗尽精力。

I'm almost always challenged by something, exhausted by something.

我想我们都一样。

I think we all are.

我们很少会感觉自己处于完美的心理状态，而要完成需要分析和深思的任务，几乎总是令人望而生畏。

It's rare that we feel like we're in this perfect mental state, and it's almost always daunting to work on a task that requires a level of analysis and contemplation.

这需要大量的精力，而作为人类的本质就是疲惫且充满挑战的。

It takes a lot of energy, and just the nature of being a human is exhausting and challenging.

因此，我们几乎从不觉得自己处于适合完成这类任务的完美状态。

And so very rarely are we gonna feel like we're in the perfect place to work on that type of task.

当我感到不知所措时，我也会拖延。

I also procrastinate when I feel overwhelmed.

当我手头事情太多，需要完成的任务堆积如山时，我会什么也不做，因为面对这么多待办事项，我根本不知道从哪里开始。

When I have too much on my plate, I have too many things that I'm supposed to be doing, I end up doing nothing because I'm so overwhelmed by the amount of things that I need to do that I don't even know where to start.

于是我不去开始，而是拖延，根本无法起步。

And instead of starting, I procrastinate, and I do not get started.

这很讽刺，因为当我日程最满、该做的事情最多时，我反而最没有精力去做任何事，结果整天睡觉，一事无成。

And it's ironic because it's like when my schedule is the most packed, and I have the most that I'm supposed to be doing, that's when I have the least energy to do anything, and I end up sleeping all day and getting nothing done.

而当我无所事事、日程空空如也时，我却能不停地干下去。

Whereas when I have nothing to do, and my schedule's wide open, I am just nonstop.

我突然有了动力去完成那些其实并不需要我做的任务。

I am suddenly, I have inspiration to get things done that I don't even have to be getting done.

突然间，我做的事情反而更多了。

Suddenly, I'm doing even more.

你明白我的意思吗？

You know what I'm saying?

但这其实是我和自己玩的一种心理游戏。

But it's a psychological game that I play with myself.

当没有压力时，我的大脑运作得最好。

My brain functions the best when there's no pressure.

但你知道吗，当我对自己能否做好没有信心时，我也会拖延。

But, you know, I also procrastinate when I'm not confident that I'll do a good job.

当我感觉即将要做的任务对我来说太难时，我会拖延不做，因为我害怕面对我认为必将到来的失败。

When I feel like an upcoming task is too challenging for me, I will procrastinate doing it because I don't want to experience the failure that I think is going to come my way.

你知道吗？

You know?

我更倾向于拖延完成项目，因为我不想体验失败的感觉。

I procrastinate completing the project more because I don't wanna experience the feeling of failure.

现在，在我的意识层面，我知道失败是没关系的。

Now in my conscious mind, I know that failure is okay.

它很重要。

It's important.

它是一件重要的事情。

Like, it's an important thing.

你知道吗？

You know?

你必须失败。

You have to fail.

我知道。

I know that.

我知道你所能做的就是尽最大努力，剩下的就顺其自然吧。

And I know that all you can do is your best, and the rest is just it is what it is.

但潜意识里，我不愿失败。

But still, subconsciously, I don't wanna fail.

因为尽管失败很重要，但这并不意味着它很有趣。

Because even though failing is important, that doesn't mean it's fun.

你知道吗？

You know?

而且潜意识里，我不愿失败。

And subconsciously, I don't wanna fail.

所以只要有可能失败，我就会拖延，而几乎每件事都存在失败的可能。

And so I'll procrastinate if there's room for failure, which there is in almost everything.

但有时候，这种感觉比其他时候更令人不堪重负。

But there are times when it feels more overwhelming than other times.

我想说，我拖延的最后一个原因是，我因为某种原因情绪上很困扰。

And I would say the last reason why I procrastinate is when I'm emotionally distraught for some reason.

我现在经常情绪困扰，我认为每个人都是如此。

Now I'm emotionally distraught frequently, and I would argue everyone is.

不管你是谁，我都无所谓。

Like, I don't care who you are.

总有些烂事在发生。

There's always some shit happening.

你懂我的意思吗？

You know what I mean?

从来没有什么是完美的。

Nothing's ever perfect.

我们从来不可能一直处于一种完美的平衡状态。

It's not like we ever get to just be in this state of perfect homeostasis.

也许偶尔会这样，但这并不是人类的常态。

Maybe, maybe every once in a while, but that's not the resting position of a human.

我们甚至无法有50%的时间处于这种状态。

That's not the place that we get to live even 50% of the time.

总有一些具有挑战性的事情在发生。

There's always something happening that's challenging.

有时是大事。

Sometimes it's something huge.

有时是小事，但总有一些事，这再正常不过了。

Sometimes it's something small, but there's always something, and that's so normal.

但根据我情绪低落的程度，有时候我根本什么都做不了，因为我情绪太激动了，当处于这种情绪状态时，根本难以逼自己前进。

But depending on how emotionally distraught I am, sometimes it can be impossible for me to get anything done because I'm too emotional, and it's just too hard to to push myself when I'm in a place where I'm emotional.

现在我也得说说我是怎么拖延的，因为这些就是我拖延的原因，但我必须告诉你们我所有拖延的方式。

Now I also have to share the ways that I procrastinate, because those are the reasons why I procrastinate, but I have to tell you all the ways that I procrastinate.

第一。

Number one.

现在这是对我而言最狡猾的方式。

Now this is the most this is the most devious way for me.

不。

No.

那不对。

That's not true.

所有这些方式都多少有点狡猾，但我总会去做一些不紧急、甚至不一定必要的家务来拖延。

All of them are somewhat devious, but I will do productive chores that are not timely, that are not even necessarily necessary in order to procrastinate.

这种做法之所以狡猾，是因为我让自己相信，做这些家务就是在做正确的事。

And the reason why this is devious is because I'm convincing myself that I'm doing the right thing by doing productive chores.

我会说，这种拖延方式在某种程度上是有点回报的，因为没错，我确实在完成其他事情，但与此同时，我可能会因为做家务而精疲力尽，并且说服自己正在做必须做的事，而实际上，我真正该完成的另一件事如果不去做，就会带来负面后果。

I will say this form of procrastination is somewhat rewarding in a way because, yes, I am getting other things done, but at the same time, I can exhaust myself doing chores, and I can sort of convince myself that I'm doing something that I need to be doing, when in reality, there's something else that I need to be completing that will come with negative consequences if I don't complete it.

我某种程度上在欺骗自己，让我以为自己在做正确的事，同时又让自己筋疲力尽。

And I'm sort of tricking myself into thinking I'm doing the right thing while simultaneously exhausting myself.

因为做家务和处理这类事情相对很耗精力。

Because doing chores and working on things like that is relatively tiring.

你知道吗？

You know?

所以，与其通过小睡来拖延，这是我的另一种拖延方式，我选择做些会让我精疲力尽的事情，以至于除非先休息，否则我根本没法完成真正该做的事。

So instead of me procrastinating by taking a nap, which is the next way that I procrastinate, I'm procrastinating by doing something that will exhaust me to a point that I actually won't be able to complete the task unless I rest first.

你明白我的意思吗？

Do you see what I'm saying?

这有点狡猾。

It's it's a little devious.

这是我大脑干的一点狡猾事，我曾经会突然开始擦地板，就是为了逃避那些我不想做、但又知道必须做的事。

It's a little devious thing that my brain does, and I've been known to, like, suddenly start scrubbing the floors to not have to do something that I don't wanna do, but that I know I have to do.

我会洗碗，把每个盘子、每把叉子都使劲儿、超使劲儿地刷，刷得特别久，就是为了不去做我不愿做的事。

I'll do the dishes, and I'll scrub every plate and every fork extra, extra hard and extra, extra long just so that I don't have to go do the thing I don't wanna do.

比如昨天，我决定给自己做未来两天的饭。

Like yesterday, I decided I would cook myself food for the next two days.

其实我没必要这么做，你知道吧？

I didn't need to do that, you know?

我会去超市，逛遍各个货架，却什么也不买，以此来拖延时间，或者我会出去买一些根本不需要的蠢东西。

I'll go to the grocery store, and just walk through the aisles, and get nothing to procrastinate, or I'll go out to buy something stupid that I didn't even need.

我会想，你知道吗？

I'll be like, you know what?

我最近特别想吃晒干的番茄，而我又没有，所以我去买些晒干的番茄吧。

I have been craving sun dried tomatoes, and I don't have those, so let me go get some sun dried tomatoes.

我真的很需要那些东西。

I actually really need those.

哦，我最近特别想吃山葵。

Oh, I've been really in the mood for, you know, wasabi.

我得找个时候做个加山葵的酱汁。

I need to make a sauce with wasabi at some point.

也许我该去超市买点山葵，找找看有没有。

Maybe I should go buy wasabi and find it at the store somewhere.

其实，根本没必要现在买这个。

Like, it's like, no, I don't need that right now.

我现在并不需要做那件事，但我还是会说服自己说我需要。

I don't need to do that right now, but I'll, like, convince myself that I need to.

我拖延的另一种方式是小睡一会儿。

The next way I procrastinate is by taking a nap.

我要说，我不确定这算不算拖延，因为我觉得如果你需要小睡，那就应该去睡。

Now I will say, I'm not sure if this is procrastination because I think if you need a nap, you should take a nap.

因为当你精疲力尽时还硬撑着工作，简直是一场噩梦。

Because trying to get work done when you're exhausted is it's a nightmare.

实际上，如果你小睡一会儿，尊重自己的疲惫感，然后再回去工作，反而能完成更多事情。

You actually end up getting more done if you take a nap, honor your tiredness, and then get back to work.

所以我不确定这是否该算作拖延，但有时候我其实并不累，也完全不需要小睡，却还是会强迫自己去睡一会儿。

So I don't know if I'd consider this procrastination, but there are times when I'm not really tired, and I really don't need a nap, but I'll kind of force myself to take a nap.

这更像是一种拖延，但界限有点模糊，因为确实有时你非常需要小睡，而这一举动反而能帮你更接近完成任务。

That's a little bit more like procrastination, but there's there's a blurred line there because there are times when you really need a nap, and actually, that step is gonna get you closer to finishing your task.

但也有时候你根本不需要小睡，也不觉得累，只是上床躺下、闭上眼睛，纯粹是为了逃避你不想做的任务。

But then there are also times when you don't need a nap, and you're not even tired, and you're just getting into bed and closing your eyes just to run away from the the task that you don't wanna do.

现在，我最不可原谅的拖延方式就是上网，滥用互联网。

Now, my least excusable form of procrastination, going on the internet, abusing the internet.

哇。

Wow.

我真的很擅长这样拖延。

I am really good at procrastinating this way.

我会去刷Instagram。

I'll go on Instagram.

我会去刷Pinterest。

I'll go on Pinterest.

我会在线购物。

I'll online shop.

听好了，我认为以健康的方式刷Instagram、Pinterest或在线购物并没有什么错。

Now listen, I don't think there's anything wrong with going on Instagram, going on Pinterest, online shopping in a in a healthy way.

因为确实存在一种健康的方式。

There because there is a healthy way.

如果你一整天的工作都完成了，躺在床上或坐在沙发上，想上Instagram、Pinterest、购物网站等等，没问题。

If you got all your work done for the day, and you're laying in bed, or you're sitting on the couch, and you wanna go on Instagram, Pinterest, online stores, whatever, sure.

我不认为你需要彻底从生活中剔除这些东西，但必须保持健康，你知道的？

I don't think that you need to completely cut those things out of your life, but it has to be healthy, you know?

我要说，与互联网使用建立健康的关系非常具有挑战性。

And I will say it's incredibly challenging to have a healthy relationship with your internet usage.

把互联网用作拖延的方式，就是这种挑战之一。

Using the internet as a way to procrastinate is one of those challenges.

它太容易让人忍不住想：你知道吗？

It's so tempting to just say, you know what?

让我就在这个购物网站上待十五分钟吧。

Let me just give myself fifteen minutes on this online store.

让我就刷十五分钟社交媒体吧。

Let me just take fifteen minutes to scroll through social media.

就给我十五分钟。

Just give me fifteen minutes.

让我就看一个YouTube视频。

Let me just watch one YouTube video.

我就看一个YouTube视频，然后就去工作。

I'm just gonna watch one YouTube video, and then I'm gonna get to work.

好的。

Okay.

等等。

Wait.

我就看一集Hulu上的这个剧。

I'm just gonna watch one episode of this show on Hulu.

好的。

Okay.

然后我就回去工作。

Then I'm gonna get back.

你明白我的意思吗？

You see what I'm saying?

很容易就会想，哦，让我先稍微放松一下，然后再回去工作。

It can be so easy to say, oh, let me just give myself a little bit of this, and then I'll get back to work.

但这种方式很少奏效。

It rarely works that way.

有时候可以，但很少见。

It can, but rarely.

我认为，通过上网来拖延问题的关键在于，当你处于拖延状态时，通常也处于情绪韧性不足的状态。

I think the problem with procrastinating by using the internet is that a lot of times when you're in a place where you're procrastinating, you're in a place where you're not emotionally resilient.

当我心理状态良好、没有压力时，刷社交媒体并不会让我困扰。

When I am in a good place mentally, and I'm not stressed out, going on social media doesn't really bother me.

比如，看到别人过得很好、活出精彩人生，我会想：干得漂亮。

Like, if I see other people thriving, living their best life, I'm like, rock on.

但当我拖延时刷社交媒体，看到别人都过得那么好，而自己却压力重重、一事无成，就会感到自我贬低，这时社交媒体对我产生了极大的负面影响。

But when I go on social media, and I'm procrastinating, and I see everyone else living their best life, and I'm stressed out, and I'm procrastinating, and I feel bad about myself because I'm not getting shit done, then social media has a really negative impact on me.

或者当我压力大、在拖延时，决定打开YouTube、看剧或做点别的，我会更难停下来，因为那时我的情绪韧性更弱。

Or when I'm stressed out, and I'm procrastinating, and I decide to turn on YouTube, or turn on a show, a TV show, or something, I'm gonna have a harder time turning it off, because I'm not as emotionally strong.

我有点脆弱，你知道的，我的意志力已经下降了。

I'm somewhat weak, you know, and my willpower is down.

它已经下降了。

It's already down.

所以，当我缺乏韧性时，更容易被剧集或YouTube吸引进去。

So then it's even easier for me to get sucked into a show or into YouTube because I'm not resilient.

或者当我在线购物时，我更可能冲动消费，因为意志力已经耗尽了。

Or if I'm online shopping, I'm more likely to impulse buy something because, again, the willpower is gone.

我已经对自己感觉有点糟糕了。

I already feel kinda bad about myself.

我只是想要一点多巴胺的刺激。

I just want a little dopamine hit.

你可以在线购物、使用社交媒体、观看各种内容，而不会让它变得有害。

You can online shop and use social media and watch various things without it being toxic.

我真的认为这是可能的。

I really do think it is possible.

但以健康的方式使用互联网的第一步是先与自己沟通。

But the first step to using the Internet in a healthy way is to check-in with yourself first.

我现在处于什么样的心态？

What type of headspace am I in right now?

我是不是因为心理状态不好，而会被卷入其中，产生负面影响？

Am I gonna get sucked into this in a bad way because I'm not in a strong mental state?

是或否？

Yes or no?

如果答案是肯定的，那你必须坚定立场，说：你知道吗？

If the answer is yes, then you gotta put your foot down and say, you know what?

不。

No.

我不会让自己这么做。

I'm not gonna let myself do this.

我需要等到心态调整好，然后再使用互联网。

I need to wait until I'm at the right headspace, and then I'm gonna use the Internet.

我认为拖延最糟糕的部分在于它让我感觉如何。

I think the worst part about procrastination is how it makes me feel.

它让我感觉非常糟糕。

It makes me feel so awful.

这是一种非常糟糕的感觉。

It's it's such a terrible feeling.

它把一个本已压力大的任务变得更加压力山大，因为我一直在拖延。

It takes a stressful task and makes it even more stressful because I'm putting it off.

你知道，任务本身可能已经很有压力，但当我决定现在不做的时候，我会让压力增加十倍，因为时间正在流逝。

You know, a task can be stressful, but when I decide I'm I'm not gonna do it right now, I make it 10 times more stressful because I'm running out of time.

你知道吗？

You know?

我现在给自己完成任务的时间更少了，因为我懒得开始，而这只会让情况更糟。

I'm now giving myself less time to complete a task because I didn't wanna start, and that just makes it worse.

所以，随着时间的推移，拖延会让你越来越焦虑。

So procrastinating over the course of a period of time makes you more and more stressed out.

你拖延得越久，就会越焦虑。

You only end up more stressed out when you procrastinate.

并不是说，哦，如果我拖延，压力就会消失。

It's not like, oh, if I procrastinate, then the stress will go away.

等我不再有压力了，我再开始做这件事。

And then once I'm not stressed out anymore, I can start the task.

不。

No.

事情不是这样的。

It doesn't work like that.

你只会变得更加焦虑，而且开始做这件事也会变得更加困难。

You just get more stressed out, and it just gets even harder to start the task.

拖延还会让生活的其他部分变得像噩梦一样。

Procrastinating also makes the rest of life feel like a nightmare.

当你拖延的时候，你什么都享受不了。

You can't enjoy anything when you're procrastinating.

例如，假设我决定不完成工作，而是去海滩。

For example, let's say I decided instead of getting my work done, I was gonna go to the beach.

好吧，我去海滩但还得带着压力，这可不有趣。

Well, I'm gonna go to the beach and be stressed out, which is not fun.

对吧？

Right?

我宁愿先把工作做完，再去海滩，这样在海滩上就能完全放松了。

I would much rather get my work done first, then go to the beach, because then I can just be relaxed at the beach.

但不行，如果我决定去做别的事而不是完成工作，我甚至都享受不了我原本想用来逃避的事情。

But no, if I decide to go and do something else instead of get my work done, I'm not even gonna enjoy the thing that I was trying to use as a distraction.

这还会让我感到不安全和无能。

And it also makes me feel insecure and incapable.

有时候我会因为感到不安全和无能而拖延。

Sometimes I'll procrastinate because I feel insecure and incapable.

但其他时候，我会因为别的原因拖延，然后才产生这种不安全感。

But other times, I'll procrastinate for a different reason, and then the feelings of insecurity come later.

这些感觉是拖延的结果。

They come as a result of the procrastination.

它们并不是拖延的原因。

They aren't the reason for the procrastination.

那种无能、不安全、觉得自己无法完成这项任务的感觉，真是糟透了。

And what a shitty feeling that is, to feel incapable, to feel insecure, to feel like I can't complete this task.

我不够聪明。

I'm not smart enough.

我不够勤奋。

I'm not hardworking enough.

我不够有天赋，等等。

I'm not talented enough, etcetera.

真是种糟糕的感觉。

What a shitty feeling.

所以我决定去搜索一下人类为什么会拖延，因为我确实相信，理解一件事能帮助我们更好地应对它。

So I decided to Google why we procrastinate as humans, because I do believe that understanding something helps us get better at managing it.

我之前提到过，但我认为管理一件事的第一步是理解它。

I mentioned that earlier, but I think the first step to managing something is understanding it.

我对人们为什么会拖延有自己的猜测，但我希望了解事实。

And I had my own suspicions about why we procrastinate, but I wanted to read the facts.

我在网上查阅了相关事实，你知道的，这些信息我都来自《纽约时报》。

Read the facts on the internet, which, you know Listen, I I got all this information from the New York Times.

我觉得这是一个可靠的来源。

I feel like that's a reliable source.

根据我读到的这篇文章，我们拖延并不是因为懒惰。

According to the article that I read, we don't procrastinate because we're lazy.

我一直以为拖延只是源于懒惰。

I always thought that procrastination was just rooted in laziness.

拖延总让我觉得自己很懒，但这篇文章说，这并不正确。

Procrastinating has always made me feel like I'm lazy, but according to this article, that is not true.

拖延是一种应对由某些任务引发的挑战性情绪和负面情绪的方式。

Procrastination is a way of coping with challenging emotions and negative moods induced by certain tasks.

负面情绪包括无聊、焦虑、不安全感、沮丧、怨恨、自我怀疑等等。

Negative moods including boredom, anxiety, insecurity, frustration, resentment, self doubt, and beyond.

你知道，我们拖延并不是因为单纯太懒，而是因为背后还有另一层情绪因素。

You know, we don't procrastinate because we're just simply too lazy, but we procrastinate because there's another layer of emotion there.

有什么东西在阻碍我们完成任务，而这种阻碍根植于我们的情绪。

There's something preventing us from completing the task that is rooted in our emotions.

这让我觉得很有意思，因为我以前从未这样想过，但确实如此。

This is interesting to me because I I never really thought of it that way, but it's so true.

当我真正去思考时，发现这真的太对了。

When I when I actually think about it, it's so true.

它总是根源于某种负面情绪。

It's always rooted in some sort of negative emotion.

这篇文章还指出，拖延是一种情绪调节问题，而不是时间管理问题。

This article also says that procrastination is an emotion regulation problem, not a time management problem.

这很有趣，因为它让我想起了自己另一种拖延方式，那就是花大量时间来规划安排事情。

And this is interesting because it actually reminded me of another way that I procrastinate, which is by spending a lot of time scheduling things out.

我 literally会通过整理日程来拖延，下一秒我就开始给所有事情做颜色分类。

I will literally procrastinate by organizing my schedule, And the next thing I know, I'm like color coding everything.

为什么？

Why?

我在干什么啊？

It's like, what am I doing?

你知道吗？

You know?

我们其实可以通过试图规划生活来拖延，这很讽刺，因为我们会说服自己：只要把日程安排好、时间管理得当，就不会拖延了。

We can actually procrastinate by trying to schedule our life, which, again, it's ironic because it's like we can convince ourselves, oh, if we organize our schedule and manage our time better, then we won't procrastinate.

但某种程度上，这本身就是拖延。

But in a way, that in itself is procrastination.

别误会我的意思。

Don't get me wrong.

我认为一定程度的日程安排和整理很重要，我确实经常这么做，它真的帮我保持正轨。

I do think a level of scheduling and organizing is important, and I definitely do that, and it really helps me stay on track.

但你知道，制定一个有条理的计划其实没花多少时间。

But, you know, creating an organized schedule really doesn't take that long.

好吧？

Okay?

它可能怎么了？

It may what?

只需要五分钟？

It takes five minutes?

我们不需要在手机上装十几个应用来帮我们按时完成任务。

We don't need to, you know, have 10 different apps on our phone to help us stay on schedule.

我们没必要花时间把每件事都用颜色分类。

We don't need to spend time color coding everything.

我觉得很多这类行为本身就是一种拖延，而拖延源于负面情绪。

I think a lot of that can actually be procrastination in itself, but procrastination is rooted in negative emotion.

这其实都是一种心理游戏。

It's kind of all a mind game.

并不是说，一天的时间不够用。

It's not like, oh, there's not enough time in the day.

所以我才没把所有事情做完。

That's why I'm not getting everything done.

不是这样的，不是这么回事。

That's not that's not it.

我们拖延是因为脑海中正在发生某种情绪波动。

We procrastinate because there's something emotional happening in our minds.

人们拖延是因为无法管理与某项任务相关的负面情绪和感受。

People procrastinate because of an inability to manage negative moods and feelings around a certain task.

拖延的本质在于，更关注于立即缓解负面情绪，而不是去完成任务。

Procrastination is about being more focused on the immediate urgency of managing negative moods than getting on with the task.

所以，当我们对某项任务感到负面情绪时，其实有两个选择。

So it's sort of like when we're feeling a negative emotion around a task, we have two options.

我们可以选择通过完成任务来让自己感觉更好，或者选择通过拖延来让自己感觉更好。

We can either make ourselves feel better by completing the task, or we can make ourselves feel better by procrastinating.

这两种方式都能给我们带来一种解脱感，但发生在不同的时间。

And both give us a sense of relief, but at different times.

当我们拖延时，会立即感到解脱。

When we procrastinate, we get an immediate sense of relief.

我们会立刻觉得，哦，好吧。

We get, like, an immediate, oh, okay.

不用现在就做。

Don't have to do it right now.

但长期来看，你会变得更加焦虑。

But then long term, you become more stressed out.

尽管有拖延的欲望，完成任务并不会带来即时的解脱，但它能带来长期的解脱，至少在那个特定任务上，这种解脱是相对持久的。

Completing the task despite the desire to procrastinate doesn't give you immediate relief, but it gives you long term relief, And it gives you somewhat permanent relief, at least in regards to that specific task.

你明白我的意思吗？

You see what I mean?

我们拖延是为了逃避负面情绪，但长期来看，反而会引发更多的负面情绪。

We procrastinate to avoid negative feelings, but then over the long term, we end up feeling more negative feelings.

根据这篇文章，人类有一种被称为‘现时偏见’的现象，这是我们天生倾向于优先满足短期需求而非长期需求的倾向。

And according to this article, there's this thing that we as humans have called present bias, which is our hardwired tendency to prioritize short term needs ahead of long term ones.

因此，我们的天性倾向于选择能带来即时满足的事物。

So we're sort of wired to choose something that gives us immediate gratification.

但在生活中的许多情境中，正确的选择是那些能带来延迟满足的路径。

But in so many scenarios in life, the right path to take is the one that offers delayed gratification.

有时，我们必须与自己的天性抗争，才能做出能带来最大长期幸福、满足和无压力生活的事情。

We almost have to fight against our nature at times in order to do what will lead us to the most long term happiness and fulfillment and stress free slay.

你知道吗？

You know?

正如我前面提到的，我们也会因为自我怀疑而拖延。

We also can procrastinate, as I mentioned earlier, because we're doubting ourselves.

我们自尊心低下。

We have low self esteem.

我们有焦虑。

We have anxiety.

我们缺乏安全感。

We're insecure.

当我们觉得自己会失败时，我们甚至不想开始这项任务。

When we feel like we're gonna fail, we don't even wanna start the task.

我们甚至不想尝试完成这项任务。

We don't even wanna try to complete the task.

如果我们相信自己会失败，那就看不到开始的理由。

If we believe that we're gonna fail, then we don't see the reason to even start.

最后但同样重要的是，我们对拖延本身往往会产生负面情绪。

And last but not least, we tend to have negative emotions around procrastination itself.

比如，当我们意识到自己在拖延时，往往会对此感到负面情绪。

Like, when we feel that we're procrastinating, we tend to feel negative emotions about that.

讽刺的是，这会让我们更加焦虑，进而导致我们拖延得更多。

And ironically, that makes us more stressed out, which then makes us procrastinate more.

这就像一个巨大的恶性循环，很难打破。

It it's just like one big vicious cycle, and it's incredibly challenging to break.

但确实有办法。

But there are ways.

明白吗？

Okay?

让我们来讨论这些方法。

And let's discuss those ways.

首先，我会先告诉你们我是如何打破拖延循环的。

First, I'm gonna start out by telling you the ways that I personally break the procrastination cycle.

第一，我会以某种方式奖励自己。

Number one, I reward myself in some way.

我要么在任务开始前奖励自己，要么在完成任务后奖励自己。

I either reward myself before the task, or I reward myself after I complete the task.

我认为在完成任务后奖励自己更有效。

I think it's more effective to reward yourself after you complete the task.

因为我发现，如果你在完成任务前就奖励自己，可能会过度奖励，结果又陷入拖延。

Because I find that sometimes if you reward yourself before you complete the task, you can then end up rewarding yourself too much, and then you again are just procrastinating.

但有时候我会允许自己在开始工作前先犒劳一下自己。

But sometimes I'll let myself have a little treat before I start working.

比如，我会给自己一小时的时间进行网上购物。

Like, I'll give myself an hour of online shopping.

顺便说一句，甚至不一定要买什么东西。

Not even necessarily buying anything, by the way.

我其实不怎么买东西。

I don't even buy things that much.

我喜欢网购的地方就在于浏览的过程。

What I enjoy about online shopping is just browsing.

这正是我钟爱它的原因。

That's what I adore about it.

所以，我会给自己安排一小时做点喜欢的事，然后可能会设个定时器，比如一小时。

So, you know, I'll give myself an hour of something enjoyable, and then maybe I'll set a timer for like an hour.

然后一旦定时器响了，我就必须开始工作。

And then once the timer's up, I have to get started with the work.

这有时有效，但有时却无效。

This works sometimes, but sometimes it doesn't.

我要说，完成后给自己奖励通常效果更好。

I will say, giving myself a reward after tends to work a lot better.

你知道，我会承诺自己，一旦完成任务，就给自己点美味的食物，或者允许自己和朋友去喝点东西，或者给自己放明天一天假。

You know, I'll promise myself that when I complete a task, maybe I'll order myself some yummy food, or I'll let myself go get drinks with friends, or I'll give myself the next day off.

某种形式的奖励。

You know, some sort of reward.

好吧。

Okay.

我管理拖延的另一种方式是强迫自己先开始做。

The next way that I manage procrastination is by somewhat forcing myself to just get started.

最难的部分是开始，你必须强迫自己克服惰性，直接去做。

The hardest part is getting started, and you kinda just have to go mind over matter and just do it.

即使你一路上又踢又哭又喊，也要强迫自己去做。

Even if you're kicking, crying, and screaming along the way, just force yourself to just do it.