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嗨，大家。
Hi, guys.
欢迎回到第二集。
Welcome back to episode two.
好吧，欢迎回到这一集，我真讨厌自己有时候说话的方式。
Well, welcome back to episode I hate the way that I say shit sometimes.
比如，我干嘛要这么说呢？
Like, just why do I say it like that?
我们重来一遍。
Let's start over.
不过别剪掉这段。
Don't cut it out, though.
这个关键词让我跟你们保持真实。
This key is keeping me real with y'all.
嗨，大家。
Hi, guys.
这是艾玛·钱伯兰。
It's Emma Chamberlain.
欢迎来到《 Anything Goes 》。
Welcome to Anything Goes.
这是我们第二期节目，我感觉棒极了。
It's our second episode, and I'm feeling amazing.
我们直接开始吧，因为我觉得今天光是这个话题我们就得聊一整天，我觉得越早开始越好。
Let's just hop right into it because I feel like we're gonna be here all day today with this topic, and, I think the sooner we start, the better.
今天我们要聊的是感情关系。
Today, we're talking about relationships.
不是友谊，是恋爱关系，所有这些，这有点奇怪，因为我这辈子从来没聊过这个话题。
Not friendships, relationships, dating, all of that, which is weird because I've literally never talked about this in my life.
我先直说重点。
I'm gonna say this right off the top.
我不会谈我之前的具体恋爱关系，因为这不符合我的风格，你们也知道。
I'm not gonna be talking about this is going to be very broad, so I'm not going to talk about my actual relationships that I've been in before just because that's not the way I roll as we know.
如果你稍微了解我，就知道我不喜欢把我的感情生活公开。
If you know me a little bit, I'm not I like to keep my relationships private.
但我确实认为谈论关系很重要，我一直想在网上聊聊这个话题，因为说来奇怪，我对人际关系有种特别的迷恋。
But I do think that relationships are important to talk about, and I've always wanted to talk about them online because weirdly enough, I have this weird fascination with relationships.
从我小的时候起，我就一直这样，我不知道为什么。
And since I was younger, I don't know okay.
我不想说得太沉重，但我不确定是不是因为小时候父母离婚了。
Not to get, like, dark, but, like, I don't know if it's because my parents were divorced when I was a kid.
所以我一直对感情关系特别关注。
So I've always just been hyperfocused about relationship.
我不太确定。
I'm not sure.
我只是觉得，我一直以来都对人际关系特别感兴趣，好奇人们为什么选择彼此，为什么有些关系会失败，为什么人们会做出那样的举动。
I just feel like I've always been so interested in relationships and why people choose who they choose and why things don't work and why people do the things that they do.
这一直让我觉得非常有趣，所以我很高兴能以一种宏观的方式来聊聊这个话题。
And it's always been something that's been so interesting to me, So I'm excited to talk about it in a broad way, obviously.
我觉得，这话题太广了，各位。
I'm like, this is broad, guys.
太宽泛了。
Very broad.
我有点害怕。
Like, I'm scared.
我在这里稍微表现出了一点恐惧，因为这并不是我通常会讨论的话题，但我其实挺兴奋的，因为这正是我每天、全天候和朋友们聊的话题。
I'm showing a little bit of fear here because this is not something that I normally discuss, but I am kind of excited because this is something I talk about with my friends literally every day, all day, all the time.
我不知道为什么，但晚上开车时聊关系问题，似乎是我和朋友们的标配。
I don't know what it is, but driving around at night and talking about relationships seems to be the go to for me and my friends.
我也是朋友的情感顾问。
I also am my friend's relationship therapist.
我不是在开玩笑。
I'm not kidding.
有趣的是，我记得小时候，我总会给朋友们提供感情建议。
It's funny because I I remember when I was younger, I would give all my friends relationship advice.
他们总是来找我。
They would always come to me.
我就是那个给别人提感情建议的女孩。
I was the girl that gave the relationship advice.
但有趣的是，我那时候还没谈过男朋友。
But what was funny about it is I had never had a boyfriend before.
所以我不知道自己为什么能给出这么多好建议，但我确实能。
So I don't know why I had all this good advice, but I did.
于是大家都来找我讨教。
And so people went to me for that.
这就像是教练自己不上场一样。
It's almost like how the coach doesn't play.
你懂我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
那段时间的我就是这样的。
That was me for a while there.
所以这还挺有意思的。
So that was kind of funny.
但不管怎样，现在你大概了解了我的背景，我在感情方面是我朋友的导师。
But anyway, so now that you kind of know my background, I am my friend's guru when it comes to that.
实际上，我们彼此都是对方的导师。
Actually, we're kind of all each other's guru.
但不管怎样。
But anyway.
所以我想先谈一谈关于恋爱和约会的第一件事，就是我刚才说的：当我年轻时，我会给所有人提建议，但我自己其实从未约会过，甚至那时候连和男孩说话都很少，感觉是这样。
So the first thing I wanna talk about with relationships and dating and all that is kind of what I just said, how when I was younger, I would give everybody advice, but I had actually never dated anybody or really even spoken to a boy at that point, it feels like.
所以年轻时我有个问题，就是因为我从未谈过恋爱，觉得自己特别差劲。
So I had this issue when I was younger where I felt like such shit for never having a boyfriend.
对吧？
Right?
因为大家都来聊聊高中时期的事吧。
Because everybody let's talk about high school here.
那时候，大一的每个人都有男朋友之类的。
It was like, you know, everybody freshman year had boyfriends and whatever.
而且，我的所有朋友都有男朋友。
And, you know, all my friends, they all had boyfriends.
我就想，我的男朋友到底在哪儿啊，老兄？
And I was like, so where the fuck is mine, dude?
这挺糟糕的。
That's kinda shitty.
我对自己感觉特别差。
And I felt so bad about myself.
奇怪的是，当我16岁的时候，明明从来没谈过恋爱，我却想，天哪。
And weirdly, when I was 16, straight up, and I had never had a boyfriend, I was like, oh my god.
我这辈子恐怕永远都不会结婚，也不会有家庭了。
I'm literally going to never get married and never have a family.
我真的不敢相信会这样。
Like, I can't believe this.
我真的完蛋了。
Like, I'm so screwed.
我永远都找不到人了。
I'm never gonna find anybody.
如果我从来没谈过恋爱，而且都16岁了，还越老越快，我该怎么去了解恋爱到底意味着什么啊？
How am I supposed to, like, you know, learn about what being in a relationship means if I've never been in one and I'm 16 and I'm getting so old?
我16岁的时候真的这么想过。
I literally thought that when I was 16.
我现在18岁了，其实还是和以前差不多大。
Now I'm 18, so I'm still basically the exact same age.
我在高中的时候给自己施加了太大压力，拼命想找个男朋友。
I put so much pressure on myself to try to, like, find a boyfriend when I was in high school.
对吧？
Right?
这让我变得特别痛苦。
And it kinda made me really miserable.
我记得去参加高中派对，就是为了跟男生搭话。
I remember going to, you know, high school parties and just, like, to talk to guys.
如果我没和任何一个人聊得来，我就会对自己特别苛刻。
And, like, if I would you know, if I didn't end up clicking with any of them, I would be super hard on myself.
有时候我根本和他们聊不起来，但还是会勉强自己，心想：好吧。
And then I and then sometimes I wouldn't click with them at all, but I would, like, kind of try to force it and be like, okay.
也许我会喜欢上他。
Maybe I'll like maybe I'll like him.
我会努力说服自己喜欢那个男生，好赶紧谈个恋爱，把第一次恋爱这件事了结掉。
Like, I would basically try to, like, convince myself I liked said said boy so that I could potentially date him and get over my get that over with, get the first boyfriend over with.
对吧？
Right?
我不后悔，因为现在我长大了，觉得那教会了我很多。
And, like, that's just like I don't regret it because I think it taught me a lot now that I'm older.
我稍后解释为什么。
I'll explain why in a sec.
但你知道，在那一刻，让我有点难过。
But, you know, in the moment, it made me kinda miserable.
我希望当时有人告诉我这一点。
And I wish that everybody told me too.
大家都说：老兄，别着急。
Everybody's like, dude, there's no rush.
但我就是觉得我错过了什么。
But I just felt like I was missing out on something.
我当时想：天啊，这看起来简直太棒了。
I was like, dude, I must be like, this shit looks hella fun.
我当时想：天哪。
I was like, oh my god.
有个男朋友真可爱。
Having a boyfriend is so cute.
一起去海滩。
Like, go to the beach together.
我就觉得无所谓吧。
Like, I don't whatever.
我的意思是，理论上听起来挺棒的。
Like, I had you know, it sounded great in theory.
所以我当时就觉得，我真的觉得自己被撇下了，而且感觉时间不多了。
And so I was like, you know, I I just felt left out, and I felt like I was running out of time.
但事情不是这样的。
But that's not how it works.
你知道，当青少年的时候，不知为什么，我觉得很多青少年都觉得时间不够用，必须在高中找到灵魂伴侣之类的。
You know, being a teen, for some reason, I feel like a lot of teens feel like they run out of they're, like, running out of time and need to find their soulmate in high school or something.
这根本不是这么回事。
That's just not how it works.
我可以告诉你，我真以为自己永远都找不到任何人，甚至都完全提不起兴趣的人。
Like, I can tell you I truly thought I would never find anybody, like, ever that I could even, like, like fully, like, even, like, be interested in fully.
但我的人生中已经发生过好几次这样的事了。
And that has happened to me quite a few times in my life.
高中时没有，但那之后就有了。
It didn't in high school, but it did after that.
我根本不会相信这件事。
And I would have never believed it.
我觉得没可能。
I was like, there's no chance.
没人，真的没人能理解我。
Nobody, like, nobody gets me.
不是的。
No.
我开玩笑的。
I'm kidding.
但我就是跟谁都合不来，这也没关系。
But, like, I just didn't click with anybody, and that's okay.
你懂我的意思吧？
You know what I mean?
对自己诚实、真实地面对这一点非常重要，因为如果你不这么做，可能会造成伤害。
And being true with yourself, being honest with yourself about that is super important because it can be kind of damaging if if you're not.
比如，我在高中时和一个男生约会了两周。
Like, for example, I I dated a kid for two weeks in in high school.
希望他没在听这个。
I hope he's not listening to this.
但如果他在听的话，最近怎么样？
But if he is, what's up?
你知道你是谁，兄弟。
You know who you are, dude.
我只是觉得，我太年轻了，总觉得我需要有个男朋友。
And, like, I was just, like, so young and, like, just was like, I feel like I need to have a boyfriend.
我不确定。
I don't know.
所以我跟这个男生约会了两周，但其实我根本还没准备好进入任何形式的感情关系。
So I, like, I dated this kid for, like, two weeks, and I just was not emotionally ready to be in any form of a relationship at all.
我当时还不够成熟。
I was not mature enough.
我当时就是，呃，怎么说呢。
I was not, like, whatever.
所以最后搞得一团糟，因为我不得不说：我觉得我做不到，因为我根本还没准备好。
And so I it just ended up being shitty because then I had to be like, I don't I don't think I can do this because I just wasn't in that place.
然后结果就是，我觉得我们之后好一段时间都没再做朋友了。
And then it just ended up I don't even think I don't think we were friends after that for a while.
这还挺糟糕的。
And that's kinda shitty.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
因为你说，我干嘛非得把事情搞到这一步？
Because it's like, why did I need to take it there?
我只是太想要个男朋友了，结果反而毁掉了一段友谊。
It was just because I wanted a boyfriend so bad, and then I kinda ruined a friendship.
所以就是这样。
So there's that.
说到友谊，我爸爸从小就这么告诉我。
Speaking of friendship, my dad always told me this growing up.
最好的事情是，当你喜欢某人时，和他们做朋友几乎比谈恋爱更好。
The best thing like, it's almost better like, when you like somebody in a way, being friends with them is almost better than dating them.
我以前总是想：你现在说的是什么啊？
And I used to be like, what are you saying right now?
我心想：你什么意思？
I was like, what do you mean?
这对我来说完全说不通。
Like, that doesn't make any sense at all to me.
后来我长大了，完全明白了。
And then I got older, and I completely get it.
因为和人谈恋爱，和和他们做朋友，完全是两回事。
Because dating people is a completely different situation than being friends with them.
当你和他们做朋友时，根本没什么责任。
When you're friends with them, it's so there's no responsibility.
我的意思是，其实还是有一点责任的，但非常小。
There's no I mean, like, there is, but it's very small.
谈恋爱时，问题总是不可避免地会出现。
Issues just inevitably arise when you're dating.
绝对是不可避免的。
Like, inevitably.
我的意思是，就算你是最随和的人，关系中的某一方也总会因为某件事不开心，然后另一方就会说，你为什么没做这个？
I mean, you could be the chillest person on planet Earth, and somehow one person in the relationship's gonna get upset about this, and then the other one's gonna be like, you know, why didn't you do this?
或者，你得开始做这个，之类的。
Or, you know, you need to start doing this and, like, whatever.
这完全是不可避免的。
It's just inevitable.
而和人做朋友，我觉得大多数时候要好上五十倍。
And being friends with people, I think, is 50 times better most of the time.
别误会。
Don't get me wrong.
有时候，当感觉是相互的，你们开始约会，那确实很好。
Sometimes when, you know, when the feeling's mutual and you date, that's great.
但我觉得，人们并没有意识到，和一个你真正在乎的人做朋友是多么特别。
But, like, people, I think, don't realize how special being friends with somebody that you really care about like that is.
尤其是如果你最终打算和他们约会的话。
Especially if you are gonna date them eventually.
我觉得在约会之前先做朋友非常重要。
I think being friends before you date is huge.
我两种都试过。
Like, I've done both.
我有过在约会前和对方做朋友的经历，也有过没有做朋友就直接约会的情况。
Like, I've been friends with people before I've dated them, and I've not been friends with people.
我也有过一上来就直接开始约会的情况。
Like, I've started dating people kind of immediately.
这两种情况我都经历过很多次。
I've done both scenarios multiple times.
根据我的经验，如果你先做朋友，情况绝对好上九十倍。
And I can say, based off of my data, that the situation is 90 times better if you're friends first, for sure.
我觉得你已经很清楚自己要面对的是什么了。
I think it just is like, you already know you're getting yourself into.
不会突然冒出一些你没预料到的关于他们性格的问题。
It's not like weird things come up that you weren't expecting about their personality.
那种舒适感是原本不会有的。
Like, there's comfort there that wouldn't have been there otherwise.
我觉得先做朋友真的很重要。
I just think being friends is really important.
奇怪的是，我爸爸给了我最好的恋爱建议。
My dad weirdly, my dad gives me the best dating advice.
我觉得我之所以像个朋友关系顾问，是因为我爸给我的建议太棒了，我只是把它当成自己的话转述出来。
I think that's why I'm the friend relationship therapist because my dad gives me the best advice, and I just relay it like it's my own.
对不起，爸爸，但随便吧。
Sorry, dad, but whatever.
我的意思是，至少我在学习，并且在运用你的经验。
I mean, at least I'm, like, learning and, like, putting your knowledge to use.
对吧？
Right?
太好了。
It's great.
我们应该写本书。
We should write a book.
天啊。
Oh my god.
你好。
Hello.
写一本关于人际关系的书。
Writing a book about relationships.
开玩笑的。
Just kidding.
没人读过。
Nobody read it.
而且可能每个人都已经写过关于我现在所说内容的书了，但这没关系。
And also everybody has probably already written books about what I'm saying right now, but that's okay.
我爸爸总是告诉我，他说，在你约会任何男生之前，艾玛，先和他做三个月的朋友。
My dad always told me, he's like, before you ever date a guy, Emma, be friends with him for three months.
三个月之后，再和他约会。
After that, date him.
但在三个月之前，你一定会后悔的。
But before three months, you're gonna make you're going to regret it.
他确实这么说。
And he yeah.
这确实可能很难，因为我觉得我爸爸说得对。
That it definitely can be tough because I think I think my dad's right.
我觉得先和某人做一段时间的朋友，真的会改变一切。
I think being friends with somebody for a decent amount of time first really, really changes everything.
但这对每个人来说可能并不成立。
And that might not be true for everybody.
我见过一些朋友，他们一见面就开始约会，结果关系却特别好。
Some people I've seen you know, some my friends have relationships where they just started dating right away, and it ended up being great for them.
但就我个人的经历而言，我并没有这样的经验。
But in my personal experience, I have not had that necessarily.
我没有这样的运气。
I haven't had that luck.
所以，这些观点其实都值得讨论。
So, you know, this is all kind of up for debate.
我很乐意和你们就这些话题展开讨论。
I'm I'm okay with debating all of this with you guys.
让我看看我的笔记。
Let me look at my notes.
我现在连播客都有笔记了，这真是太奇怪了。
I literally have notes for podcasts now, which is so weird.
好吧。
Alright.
哇。
Wow.
这下要聊的内容可真多，我觉得我这辈子都没这么想聊过这么多事情。
This is gonna be a stacked I don't think I've ever had more things I wanna talk about in my life.
所以接下来我想讨论的是，一旦进入一段关系后，有几件事。
So the next thing I wanna discuss is once you're in a relationship, like a few things.
好的。
Okay.
我觉得年轻的时候，很容易陷入一段关系，然后过度依赖对方。
So I think when you're young, it's so easy to get into a relationship and be so dependent on the other person.
我以前就这么做过，结果伤得很惨。
I've done this and it's hurt me really bad before.
这根本不是别人的错，而是我自己的问题，但让我解释一下。
And it's not even been anybody else's fault but my own, but let me explain.
所以，你知道，当你在一段关系中时，这没什么好羞愧的。
So, you know, if you're in a relationship and you know, this is nothing to be ashamed of either.
这很正常。
Like, this is normal.
这是人之常情。
It's human.
但在某些关系中，你可能会对对方产生一种近乎痴迷的感觉，不一定是不健康的，只是你太爱对方了，或者至少你觉得自己爱上了对方，以至于你满脑子想的都是他们。
But sometimes in relationships, you can be so kind of obsessed with the person in a sense, not necessarily in an unhealthy way, but just kinda like, you know, you're so in love with them in a sense, or at least you think you are, that, like, they're kind of all you think about.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
就像你早上醒来，刷牙的时候，心里会想：天啊。
It's like you you're like, you wake up in the morning, and you're brushing your teeth, and you're like, oh my god.
他们在做什么呢？
I wonder what they're doing.
然后，你做早餐的时候，就会想，天啊。
And then, you know, you're cooking breakfast, and you're like, oh my god.
我好想早点见到他们。
I can't wait to see them later.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
这很正常。
And that's normal.
但因为我经历过各种极端的关系，有时候我会特别痴迷，整天想他们。
But because, again, I've had multiple relationships that are both ends of the spectrum where sometimes I'm, like, obsessed with them, and I'm, can't stop thinking about them.
而有时候，我只是在必要时才想起他们。
And then sometimes I just, like, think about them when it's necessary.
就像，哦，对啊。
It's like, oh, yeah.
我正在和他们约会。
I'm dating them.
酷。
Cool.
然后就无所谓了。
And then it's, like, whatever.
对吧？
Right?
我都经历过两种情况。
I've just had both.
我觉得当你极度痴迷并依赖一个人时，长期让你感觉糟糕的原因有几个。
And I feel like when you're super kind of obsessed and dependent on the person, the reason why it can make you feel like shit long term is because a few things.
第一，他们的沟通方式以及对待你的行为会直接影响你的情绪，我注意到了。
Number one, their communication with you and their the way that they behave towards you starts to directly affect your emotions, I've noticed.
比如，假设他们一整天都不跟你说话。
Like, if let's say they don't talk to you all day, like, at all.
对吧？
Right?
你会被甩开的。
You're gonna be bumped.
真的会被甩得老远。
Like, super fucking bumped.
你会觉得：天啊。
Like, you're gonna be like, damn.
天哪。
Like, oh my god.
他们讨厌我吗？
Like, do they hate me?
我太难过了。
Like, I'm so upset.
你知道的，我。
Like, I I'm you know?
天哪。
Oh my god.
我真的起不来床。
Like, I I literally can't get out of my bed.
这种事情每个人都遇到过。
Like, this has happened to everybody.
我每一个朋友都经历过这种事。
I every friend I've ever had, this has happened to them.
但另一方面，如果你能稍微想想，怎么说呢，不显得有点怪异？
But on the other hand, if you kind of are like, you know, if you're kind of a little bit more how do I put this without sounding, like, kinda fucked up?
因为我想说，一半一半吧。
Because I wanted to say, like, half and half in it.
一半一半的意思是，你确实为对方投入了大量时间、爱和精力，但同时你也要把另一半——不，不是一半，而是同样多的时间、精力和爱投入给自己。
Like, half and half meaning that you put you definitely put a lot of time and love and energy into the person, but you also put another half not even another half, but you also put a lot of time and energy and love into yourself too.
那么当你的另一半不回你消息时，你就想，好吧。
Then when, like, your significant other doesn't text you back, you're like, okay.
如果他们没事，那就说明他们迷失了。
They're lost if they don't if they, like if they're okay.
他们会跟我分手吗？
Are they gonna break up with me?
哦，看看会发生什么吧。
Oh, let's see what happens.
我不在乎，这其实有点不正常。
Like, I don't care, which is, like, kinda not normal.
但听起来我好像有点在讽刺。
But it's like that sounds like I'm kinda being sarcastic.
我不知道该怎么解释这个。
I don't know how to explain this.
但这是因为你不会每天把幸福寄托在他们身上，所以你会有一种奇怪的理智感和安心感，知道无论发生什么，即使他们真的说‘我们结束了’，你也会难过，确实会很沮丧。
But it's like, because you're not depending on them for your happiness day to day, you kind of have this weird feeling of sanity and comfort in knowing that no matter what could happen, if they literally were like, we're over, you'd be, like, sad, and you'd definitely be bummed out.
但你知道你能应对得了。
But you know that you could handle it.
你知道你能挺过去的。
You know that you could get through it.
我曾经谈过一些恋爱，那时候我会想，如果他们和我分手，我真的不知道自己会怎么办。
I've been in relationships where I'm like, if they break up with me, I literally don't know what I would do.
我简直得躲进洞里，像在雨中露宿一样，听着Tame Impala，哭上至少一个月。
I'd literally have to go in a hole in and, like, sleep outside, like, in the rain and listen to Tame Impala and cry for at least a month.
对吧？
Right?
就是在大自然里。
Like, in in nature.
我真可能会搬去意大利待一个月，在咖啡店工作，学意大利语。
Like, I I would literally need to move to, like, a really cool like, Italy for a month and work in a coffee shop and learn Italian.
对我来说，确实有过这样的恋爱关系。
Like, I I there's been relationships like that for me.
所以是的。
And so yeah.
我的意思是，我只是觉得，确保你不至于如此依赖对方，要掌控好自己，把注意力放在自己身上，关注自己的兴趣、朋友，把这些都当作生活中最重要的事，而不是把所有希望都寄托在别人身上。
I mean, I just think that making sure that you're not that you're keeping in you're controlling yourself, and you're making sure to stay focused on yourself in your own life, in your own hobbies, in your own friends, and keeping all those things a huge priority in your life and not putting everything into somebody else.
因为人们总是对我说这种话，说我得有自己的生活。
Because people always used to say that shit to me being like, you need to have your own life.
在我开始谈恋爱之前，我就一直这样想。
And I would be like like, before I ever started dating.
然后突然间，我一眨眼就犯了这个错误。
And then suddenly, I blinked and, like, I made that mistake.
我真的犯了这个错误。
Like, I fully made that mistake.
所以，说真的，回头看看，我很庆幸自己经历了这些，因为我从中学会了很多。
So and, I mean, I'm I'm glad I did in retrospect, like, because I learned a lot from that.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
它让我意识到，我曾经的那些关系让我根本没好好照顾自己。
It made me like I feel like I've been in relationships that have made me just not take care of myself either.
我根本就没想过自己。
Like, I just didn't even think about myself.
我一直在想他们。
I was thinking about them.
就这样结束了。
And so that was that.
所以，我想我差不多已经讲清楚了依赖型和非依赖型关系的区别。
So that's kind of I think I pretty much covered dependent versus not dependent relationships.
如果你处于一种非常依赖的关系中，你们彼此过度依赖，甚至到了不健康或有害的程度，如果你需要建议如何摆脱这种状态——因为这是可能的——我认为最重要的是减少和他们相处的时间，不要每天都和他们在一起，不要为他们清空你的日程，要让和他们相处的时光变得特别，但同时也要花大量时间与不是他们的人在一起。
And, you know, if you're in if you're in a very dependent situation where you guys are kind of, like, really, really rely on each other in an unhealthy way or a detrimental way, if you need advice on how to not how to kinda get yourself out of that, because it's possible, I think the biggest thing is limiting your time with them, not spending every single day with them, not clearing your schedule for them, you know, making the time with them special, but also spending a lot of time with people that aren't them.
比如你的朋友、家人，尤其是独处的时候。
So, like, maybe your friends, your family, by yourself, especially.
我觉得，在一段关系中花很多时间独处，这其实挺少见的，除非是异地恋，但这种情况依然少见。
Lots of time I think spending time by yourself while you're in a relationship is kinda weirdly rare unless it's, like, long distance, but it's rare.
所以，确保你有一些独处的时间。
And so, like, making sure that you have some time by yourself.
回家后，做你自己的事。
Like, go home and do your own thing.
你知道的。
You know?
这可能很难。
That can be hard.
我觉得如果你还在上学，可能会容易一些。
And I think if you're in school, it's easier maybe.
我不确定。
I'm not sure.
但你要专注于你的学业、工作，提升自己。
But you focus on, you know, your school, your work, bettering yourself.
比如对我而言，就是锻炼身体。
Like, for me, it was like, you know, exercising.
一旦我开始专注于这些事情，我就渐渐能够放下那种依赖感——觉得如果他们离开，我会活不下去。
Once I started focusing on all those types of things, it was like I kind of was able to, like, let go of that dependent feeling that if they left, I would die.
你明白我的意思吧？
Like you know what I mean?
因为那时我有了属于自己的生活。
Because I then had a life on my own.
我认为当你特别害怕对方提出分手时，原因当然是你爱他们、在乎他们，这确实让人害怕。
I think the reason why it's scary when you get really scared of somebody breaking up with you I mean, obviously, you love and care about them, so that's scary.
但我认为，当你觉得自己除了这段关系外没有属于自己的生活时，那种恐惧会加剧十倍、可怕十倍。
But I think it it's 10 times worse and 10 times more scary when you don't feel like you have a life of your own outside of the relationship.
对吧？
Right?
所以你会想，天哪。
So you're like, oh my god.
如果他们和我分手，我都不知道一天该怎么过。
If they broke up with me, I wouldn't know what to do with my day.
真的，我完全不知道一天该怎么过。
Like, straight up, I wouldn't know what to do with my day.
我什么也不做。
I don't I don't do anything.
因为除了工作啊，或者上学啊，可能再做点别的事情之外。
Because except for, like, maybe work or, you know, go to school and, like, maybe do one other thing.
除此之外，我把所有其他的空闲时间都花在他们身上了。
And then besides that, I'm spending all of my other free time with them.
所以一旦他们从你的生活中消失，你就突然有了大把空闲时间和空间要填补，这太可怕了。
And so then the second that they're out of your life, you have all this free time and space to fill, and that's terrifying.
我觉得，如果你能用一些不涉及他们的、属于你自己的事情来填满大部分空闲时间，那么即使他们离开，或者你打算离开，也不会那么可怕。
And I think that if you kind of are filling, you know, a lot of your free time with stuff that's for you that doesn't involve them, then if it's less scary if they were to leave or if you wanna leave or whatever.
就是这样，搞定。
And that's that's that, bitch.
我觉得我关于这个话题已经说完了。
I think I'm done with that.
我真的不知道我刚才说的那些话有没有道理。
I literally have no idea if anything that I just said makes sense.
我总是会一股脑儿地说出来，然后脑子一片空白，忘了自己刚才说了什么。
And I kind of just tend to word vomit and blank out and, like, forget what I said.
所以我不知道我听起来会怎么样，但对我自己来说，听这一集一定会很有趣。
So I don't know what I sound it's gonna be interesting for me to listen to this to this episode.
也许我会从中学会一些东西。
Maybe I'll maybe I'll teach myself something.
好吧。
Okay.
我想讲这个故事，但我已经讲过太多次了，不过我还是觉得它有点隐喻意味，或许会有些帮助。
I wanted to tell this story, but, like, I've already told it so many times, but I do feel like it's low key metaphorical and it could be useful.
让我告诉你一个我二年级时想讨好一个男孩的故事。
So let me tell you a story about when I was trying to impress a boy in, like, second grade.
我已经讲过太多次这个故事了，简直在我的社交媒体上无处不在。
I've told this story so many times, but like, on my Snapchat, on my literal everywhere.
我发誓。
I swear to God.
但不管怎样，我现在上三年级了。
But anyway, I'm in, like, third grade.
我暗恋这个男孩。
I had a crush on this kid.
我发誓，从四岁起我就一直对人有好感。
I swear to God, I I literally have had crushes on people since I was four years old.
我在幼儿园时就暗恋过别人。
I had a crush in preschool.
我觉得这有点不正常。
I feel like that's, like, not normal.
我能说什么呢？
What can I say?
但 basically，我暗恋这个男孩，他特别可爱，让我整个生活都变得美好。
But, basically, had a crush on this boy, very cute, and love my life.
他是个小冲浪男孩。
He's a little surfer boy.
他来自夏威夷。
He's from Hawaii.
所以你知道吗，从一开始我的类型就固定了，一直忠于自己。
So, you know, my type had been set in stone since day one, super being super true to myself.
我记得他总是来上学，穿着Quicksilver和所有冲浪品牌的东西。
And I remember, like, he would always come to school and he'd be wearing, like, you know, Quicksilver and all the surf brands.
而我有条裤子是Roxy的。
And so and I had these little pants that were Roxy.
Roxy是专为女孩设计的冲浪品牌。
Roxy is like a surf brand for girls.
Roxy和Quicksilver就像是两个独立的品牌。
And it's like Roxy and Quicksilver are like they're they're like a they're two separate whatever.
它们就像康威和耐克一样，虽然同属一个公司，但谁在乎呢？
This is they're, like, the same, but it's like fucking Converse and Nike.
它们其实是一家公司的，但谁管它呢？
Like, they're, like, connected under the same you who cares?
天哪。
Holy shit.
谁在乎呢？
Who cares?
总之，我上学时穿着这条小小的Roxy裤子。
Anyway, so basically, I came to school, I was wearing these little Roxy pants.
然后我就说：嘿。
And I was like, hey.
嘿，小子。
Hey, boy.
我不打算说出他的名字。
I'm not gonna say his name.
嘿，小子。
Hey, boy.
你觉得我的裤子怎么样？
Like, do you like my pants?
这是Roxy的，因为你是个冲浪男孩。
Like, they're Roxy because you're a surfer boy.
所以，你觉得怎么样？
So, like, what do you think?
有什么想法？
Thoughts?
我的意思是，我当时也不是三年级小孩，所以这没什么大不了的。
I mean, I wasn't, like, third grade, so, like, it's chill.
因为现在如果我这么做，我希望有人直接拉黑我，再也不理我。
Because, like, now if I did that, I would hope that somebody would just block my number and never speak to me again.
但那时候，你知道的，三年级完全是另一个样子，那是另一个时代。
But, like, at the time, you know, third grade third grade was a different it was a different era.
那时候甚至还没到2010年。
It wasn't even 2010 yet.
是的。
Yes.
确实是。
It was.
我还是别管了。
I'm just gonna never mind.
是吗？
Was it?
不是。
No.
根本不是。
It wasn't.
好吧。
Okay.
我没错。
I was right.
所以，我问他关于我的Roxy裤子的事。
So, yeah, I asked him about my Roxy pants.
他就说，是啊，挺酷的。
He's like, yeah, they're cool.
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你为什么，为什么，你干嘛要问啊？
Why why why'd you like, why'd you ask?
我就说，老兄，因为你 surfing 啊。
And I was like, dude, because you, like, surf.
你难道不喜欢这些吗？
Like, don't you like these?
天啊。
Oh my god.
我真想他妈的，哦，这个故事让我难受。
I wanna fucking oh, that story hurts me.
我真是身体上因为这个故事感到疼痛。
I'm literally, like, physically in pain from that story.
希望你们喜欢这个故事。
Hope you guys enjoyed it.
但不管怎样，这个比喻是，我觉得很多人——我见过很多人这么做，我自己也做过。
But, anyway, the metaphor for that is that I think a lot of people and I've seen people do it, and I've done it.
所以别以为我没做过，我确实做过。
So let's not I'm not gonna fucking act like I haven't done it because I completely have.
我在关系中注意到一件很有趣的事，甚至在关系初期，当你只是和某人聊天、有点感兴趣的时候。
I've noticed something really interesting in relationships or even when you're, like, in the beginning stages of a relationship where you're just talking to somebody and you're kind of interested.
当你喜欢一个人时，你往往会稍微迎合对方，你知道的，一直同意、同意、同意，因为你希望对方觉得你们有共同点。
Like, a lot of the times when you like somebody, you're gonna kind of conform a little bit, you know, kind of agree, agree, agree, because, like, you wanna agree with them so that they think that you guys have stuff in common.
对吧？
Right?
这很正常。
That's normal.
我以前是个有点讨好型人格的人。
And I used to be I'm kind of a people pleaser a little bit.
我希望我用这个词用对了，但我就是希望每个人时刻都感到开心和舒适，这对我来说是首要目标。
I hope I'm using that word correctly, but I I feel like I just want everybody to feel happy and comfortable all the time, and that's just my number one goal.
有时这会让我自己吃亏，但这是我愿意承担的风险。
Sometimes at my own expense, but that's the risk I'm willing to take.
所以对我来说，我以前总是倾向于同意，但我现在完全不会这样了，因为我现在非常讨厌这种做法。
And so, you know, for me, like, I just tend to agree with like, well, I I don't do this anymore at all because I've completely I hate that now.
但这根本不是真实的自己。
But because it's not true to yourself at all.
我以前只是想同意每个人，好让大家都感到舒适，觉得自己的观点没有被评判，或者不会……你知道的，其他什么情况。
But I used to just kind of wanna agree with everybody just so that everybody would feel comfortable and they'd feel like they weren't being judged for their opinions or they wouldn't, you know, whatever.
不会因为自己喜欢什么或不喜欢什么而被评判。
Or judged for what they like or judged for what they don't like.
所以我就会只是附和别人，随大流。
And so I would just kind of agree with people and just kinda go with it.
你懂我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
或者，更进一步，就像我刚才讲的那个年轻时的故事。
Or, like, try to or to take it a step further, more like the story I just told when I was a lot younger.
你知道的，甚至一直到高中，我都会假装对一些我不感兴趣的东西感兴趣，只为给那个人留下好印象。
Like, you know, and even up until high school, I would like act like I was interested in things that I wasn't interested in to try to impress said person.
我觉得当你和你约会的人在某些事情上有不同看法时，其实特别棒。
I think it's actually really cool when you and the person that you're dating have, like, different opinions on things.
有些人说，不行，这样行不通。
Some people are like, no, that doesn't work.
这样行不通。
That doesn't work.
我听过别人这么说。
I've heard people say that.
他们说，不行，这样行不通。
They're like, no, it doesn't work.
我完全不同意。
I completely disagree.
我觉得有不同看法或不同兴趣，反而能打开一扇门，让你了解更多新东西。
And I think having different opinions or having different interests, it's like it it actually opens a door to learn more about something new.
因为如果你和你约会的人 everything 都一样，那就没什么可学的，也得不到什么了。
Because if you and the person you're dating have everything in common, there's nothing to learn or take from that.
比如说，这段关系中一个人喜欢做饭，另一个人喜欢冲浪。
Whereas, let's say one person in this relationship loves cooking and the other person in this relationship loves to surf.
基本上，你们可以互相交流这些知识。
Basically, you can switch that knowledge.
对吧？
Right?
那样就很好了。
And then that's great.
你们可以学到新东西，这非常重要。
And you guys can learn new things, and that's really important.
或者说，一个人喜欢番茄，另一个人讨厌番茄。
Or let's say one person loves tomatoes, the other person hates tomatoes.
好吧。
Okay.
那你们就别一起去吃披萨店了。
Then just don't go to a fucking pizza parlor together.
放松一下。
Relax.
我觉得人们以为他们必须拥有所有共同点，但事实并非如此。
It's like I think people think they need to have everything in common, and that's just not true.
我以前也这么认为。
And I used to think that too.
他们可能会想，你知道的，你想让和你交谈的人开心。
And they would wanna you know, you wanna please the person you're talking to.
去他妈的这一切。
Fuck all of that.
去他妈的这一切。
Fuck all of that.
如果你有意见，就说出来。
If you have an opinion, say it.
我觉得这会让你更有趣。
It it makes you more interesting, I think.
我喜欢别人稍微挑战我一下。
I love when people challenge me a little bit.
我喜欢这样的情景：我说‘天啊，我超爱这首歌’，然后有人回‘我觉得其实挺烂的’。
I love when people if I'm like, dude, I love this song, and somebody's like, I think it's actually kinda shit.
我会说：‘真的吗？’
I'm gonna be like, really?
我很想听听你的理由。
I'd love to hear why.
我可以告诉你，关于为什么我们意见不同，这场对话通常会比我们因观点一致而展开的对话有趣得多。
And I can tell you the conversation about why we disagree is gonna be a lot more interesting than the conversation that we would have about why we agree most of the time.
我觉得这挺有意思的。
It's like, I think it's kinda fun.
我的意思是，显然你们也会在某些事情上达成一致，这很好，但别为了迎合别人改变自己的观点。
Like, you it I mean, obviously, you're gonna agree on some shit too, and that's great, But don't change your opinion.
我之前已经说过了。
I covered that.
我已经不在乎了。
I'm over it.
你明白我的意思吧。
You get what I'm saying.
我很庆幸自己某种程度上走出了那种状态，因为自从那以后，我交到了更多朋友。
I'm glad that I kind of, in a sense, grew out of that because I think that I've actually made a lot more friends since that.
我觉得现在我更能与人建立真正的连接了，因为我对自己所有的观点都坦诚相待，从不刻意粉饰。
Like, I feel like I actually connect better with people now that I'm really honest about all of my opinions and I don't try to sugarcoat anything.
我觉得这让我的人际关系变得更加有意义了。
I think it's actually made my relationships in my life a lot more meaningful.
就这样了。
So that's that.
我觉得差不多就是这样了。
I feel like that's kind of it.
我觉得我现在准备好回答问题了。
I feel like I'm kind of ready to answer questions.
我的意思是，我本来打算聊聊，但我觉得我已经说完了。
I mean, I was gonna talk about I feel like I just covered it.
我觉得我今天表现得太棒了，伙计们。
I feel like I did really fucking great, guys.
我觉得我做这个播客简直太在行了。
I feel like I'm so good at this podcasting shit.
‘超级天才’可能失败了，但‘无所不包’这儿可是行得通。
Super genius might have been a fail, but anything goes is here.
而且艾玛超喜欢。
And Emma loves it.
所以我要想想，我有没有讲到这个话题。
So I'm gonna try to think about if I covered this topic.
等一下。
Hold on.
好吧。
Okay.
我想我应该聊聊分手，然后我们就结束。
I guess I should cover breakups, and then we'll stop.
然后我们再来回答问题。
And then we'll ask answer questions.
大家觉得怎么样？
How does that sound, guys?
在家的每个人都回答我一下。
Everybody answer me at home.
我真想听听你们的声音。
I'd love to hear your voice.
好吧。
Okay.
总之，我们来聊聊分手吧，因为这是不可避免的。
Anyway, so let's talk about breakups because they're they're the inevitable.
我觉得分手有几种类型。
I feel like there's a few types of breakups.
我觉得至少有两种主要类型。
There's, like, the type where or at least these are the two main types, in my opinion.
有一种是，天啊，这简直就是我的灵魂伴侣。
There's the type where it's like, oh my fucking god, that is my soulmate.
什么？
What the fuck?
不。
No.
这不可能发生。
This can't be happening.
我们本该结婚的。
We were supposed to get married.
我无法相信这件事。
I can't believe this.
到底发生了什么？
What's going on?
我现在该怎么办？
What am I supposed to do now?
我再也找不到像他们这样的人了。
I'll never find anybody else like them.
我简直不敢相信。
I can't believe this.
我受到创伤了。
I'm traumatized.
我再也不想和任何人约会了。
I never wanna date anybody again.
我甚至看不了其他人。
I can't even look at another person.
对我来说，其他人都很丑。
Everybody else to me is ugly.
我讨厌所有人。
I hate everybody.
我做不到。
I can't do this.
我要死了。
I'm gonna die.
我真的要死了。
I'm literally gonna die.
我，呃，随便吧。
I I, like, whatever.
就这样吧。
So there's that.
好吧。
Okay.
还有一种情况是，你觉得挺糟的，但算了。
And then there's the other type where you're like, that kind of blows, but, alright.
就像，这不是命中注定的。
Like, it wasn't meant to be.
就是那种，你知道的，
Where you're just kinda like, you know what?
我可以尊重这个人。
I can respect this person.
我可以，你知道的，在意这个人，但我就是知道我们不该在一起。
I can, like, you know, care about this person, but I just I know that we're not supposed to be together.
你知道的？
You know?
所以我觉得第二种分手，就是我刚才说的那种，其实根本没必要谈，因为我觉得这根本没那么重要。
So I'd say for the second type of breakup, the one I just talked about, that's just I don't feel like that really needs to be talked about because I feel like that's so much less significant.
就是，除非他们做了什么伤害你的事，否则其实没什么心理负担。
Like, it's just there's not there's no mental toll really with that unless they did something to hurt you.
但假设有人以某种方式伤害了你。
But let's say somebody hurts you in a way.
比如，我不知道。
Like, let's say I don't know.
我甚至想不出具体例子，但对方做了某些让你非常难过的事，而你其实也已经不再那么投入这段关系了。
I don't even have an example, but they do something that that makes you really upset, but you also don't really you know, you also aren't really into the relationship anymore.
即使感情已经淡了，你依然可能因为某些事感到受伤。
Even if you kind of even if the feelings were lost, like, you can still be hurt about things.
这完全是人之常情。
Like, that's totally human.
但我觉得，即便如此，从这种伤痛中走出来还是容易得多。
But I feel like still that's a lot easier to kind of move on from.
而那种你以为自己和灵魂伴侣分手的类型，真的特别痛，我特别想聊聊这个。
Whereas the type of breakup when you think you break up with your soulmate, that shit hurted, and I'd love to talk about it.
虽然有人在推特上问我是否相信灵魂伴侣的存在，我很乐意以后再谈这个话题。
So although I saw somebody ask me on Twitter if I thought soulmates exist, and I would love to talk about that later.
但我认为，人生中第一次分手，往往是最痛苦的。
But the thing I've learned I think the first breakup in your of your life, like the first breakup you ever have is the worst.
据我观察，之后的分手就会容易得多。
I think after that, it gets a lot easier from what I can tell.
但我才18岁，你知道的，随它吧。
But I'm also only 18 and, you know, whatever.
但在它第一次发生在我身上之前，我根本不懂心碎是什么感觉。
But I never understood what, like, heartbreak felt like until it happened to me for the first time.
天啊。
And oh my god.
我简直不敢相信我在互联网上聊这个。
I can't believe I'm talking about this on the internet.
这太疯狂了。
This is crazy.
这个播客让我开了眼界。
This podcast is opening my eyes.
但我第一次心碎的时候，好吧，我那时还是个很年轻的女孩。
But the first time I was heartbroken, okay, I mean, I was a really young woman.
所以谁知道那和我的反应有什么关系。
So who knows what that had to do with the reaction.
但我感觉我真的哭了个痛快。
But I felt like I literally cried.
我并不经常哭。
I don't cry that often.
我哭了整整一周，当时觉得我再也活不下去了。
I was like I cried for like a week, and I did not think I could live on.
这真是太奇怪了。
Like, it was the weirdest.
我感觉自己特别虚弱。
And I felt so weak.
天哪。
I was like, oh my god.
这到底是怎么回事？
What the hell?
我这种人通常是能很快振作起来的。
Like, I'm the type of person that bounces back.
对吧？
Right?
我通常都能很快恢复过来。
I bounce back from most things.
这件事对我的打击比以往任何事都大，我当时就想，这到底是怎么回事？
The fact that this was tearing me down more than, like, anything else I ever had, I was like, what the fuck?
这只是一个男人。
This is a dude.
就是个我平时挺在意的家伙，我一直在想，为什么？
Like, this is a guy I'm like, why do why?
我为什么会这么难过？
Why am I so upset?
但我真的很难过。
But I was really fucking sad.
而且你永远也不知道对方心里是怎么想的。
And the thing that was, you know, you never know how the other person feels either.
这有点尴尬，也挺脆弱的。
And it's kind of embarrassing, and it's kind of vulnerable.
你不知道他们是否也有同样的感觉。
You don't know if they feel the same.
你知道的。
You know?
你不知道他们是否想你，之类的。
You don't know if they miss you, whatever.
整个事情都特别让人困惑。
It's like the whole thing is, like, so confusing.
但我很想告诉你，我是怎么度过第一次分手的。
But I'd love to tell you how I kind of got through my first breakup.
所以对我来说，其实这挺明显的，但头一个月左右，我觉得我其实挺好的，大概一周后就差不多了。
So I think for me, it was just I mean, this is pretty obvious, but I just I basically, for the first month or so actually, I think I was pretty I was pretty good after, like, a week.
所以头一周，我只是花了一些时间放松，就这样，随便吧。
So I'd say for the first week, I just spent some time where I was, like, you know, just kinda chilled out, whatever.
然后因为那是一段很激烈的分手。
And then because it was like an intense one.
你知道的？
You know?
好吧。
Okay.
为了给你一些背景，不是所有的分手都那样。
Because to give you some context, some breakups aren't like that.
然后，你知道的，在那之后，我开始去上SoulCycle，那是我最喜欢的健身课程。
And then, you know, after that, I started, like I actually started going to SoulCycle, which is my favorite workout class.
我开始爱上锻炼，努力提升自己，专注于自己，培养兴趣爱好，和朋友家人建立更紧密的联系，诸如此类。
And I started getting, you know, into working out and, like, started, like, bettering myself, you know, and, like, focusing on myself and focusing on getting hobbies, focusing on getting closer with my friends and family and all of that.
然后，砰，就这么一下，事情就发生了。
And then boom, woop, there it is.
我感觉好多了，也挺好的。
I felt better and I was fine.
这需要时间。
And it takes time.
你懂我的意思吧？
You know what I mean?
这需要很长的时间。
It takes a lot of time.
你以为自己好多了。
You think you're better.
不管你的分手在你生命中是否重要，你还是会想起它。
And then like, no matter if your breakup was significant or not in your life, you still think about it.
比如，即使在夜里躺在床上时，你还是会想，那段感情真是他妈的奇怪。
Like, it still crosses your mind sometimes when you're, like, in bed at night, you're like, that shit was fucking weird.
真是见鬼了。
Like, what the fuck?
天啊，这到底是怎么回事？
What the fuck, dude?
就是，你还是会时不时想到它，或者类似的事情。
Like, you still think about it or, you know, whatever here and there.
但那就是生活。
But, like, that's life.
我不觉得有人从来不会偶尔想到这些。
I don't think anybody doesn't think about that sometimes.
对吧？
Right?
所以就是这样。
So that's that.
但我觉得，如果你现在正在经历分手，或者你知道，或者你还没经历过，只是想把这些记在心里，那就多花点时间和朋友家人在一起，好好锻炼，给自己做饭，培养一个新的爱好。
But I think if you're going through a breakup right now, or if you're, you know, or if you haven't and you just wanna store this in the back of your head, spend a lot of time with your friends and family and fucking exercise, cook for yourself, get a new fucking hobby.
我发誓。
I swear to God.
结交新朋友。
Make new friends.
哦，这可是个大问题。
Oh, that's a huge one.
我总体上很喜欢交新朋友，这挺让人惊讶的。
I love making new friends in general, which is shocking.
我讨厌这样，但我又喜欢这样。
I hate it, but I love it.
就像，这挺奇怪的。
Like, it's weird.
我的意思是，如果对方很酷、很友善，我就喜欢交朋友。
I mean, I like making new friends if they're cool and and nice.
如果他们不是这样，那当然就不行。
If they're not, then obviously not.
但要是我遇到酷的人，我就特别喜欢。
But, like, if I meet cool people, I love it.
我超爱这种事。
I love that shit.
所以我认为，稍微多主动一点，多社交，即使有点超出你的舒适区，也会带来很大帮助。
So I think kind of putting yourself out there a little bit more and being really social, even if it's little bit out of your comfort zone, can help so much.
这对我很有帮助，每次分手后都让我受益良多。
That helps me that's helped me so much time and time again during breakups.
比如，只要我稍微多主动一点，就好了。
Like, if I just kinda put myself out there a little bit more, boom.
我感觉好多了。
I'm good.
因为当你和别人分手后，最想念的往往是那种持续不断的交流。
Because then it's just like you know, I think the thing that you miss the most when you break up with somebody is, like, that constant communication.
而如果你能稍微多去社交一下，就会感觉很好，因为你会想，嗯，我现在一点都不孤单。
And then if you get to go be social a little bit, then it's nice because it's like, okay, I don't even feel lonely right now.
对吧？
Right?
所以这些就是应对分手的方法。
So those that's breakups.
我觉得我已经讲完了。
I think I covered it.
我觉得我们今天对关系进行了非常深入的探讨。
I feel like we did a really I feel like I really deep dove into relationships here.
我希望你们能从中学到一些有价值的东西。
I hope something valuable came out of that for you guys.
我可能会再做一期关于关系的节目，因为我对此有太多观点和感受。
I'll probably end up doing another episode on relationships because I just have so much so many opinions on it and so many, like, feelings about it.
我是个非常敏感的人，而我就是喜欢这样。
And I'm a very sensitive person, and I love that shit.
所以我们以后还会聊更多这方面的内容。
And so so we'll get more on that later.
但现在我们先不聊这个了。
But now let's answer not more on that later.
我们还在继续聊这个话题。
We're still fucking talking about it.
但我们可能会再做一次。
But we might do it again.
现在我们来回答一些问题。
Now let's answer some questions.
你们给我提了一些问题。
So you guys asked me some questions.
你们要么留下语音留言，如果想这么做，可以拨打 (567) 275-3662，留下一个简短的语音问题。
You either left a voicemail, which if you wanna do that, you can call (567) 275-3662, and you can leave a short voicemail question for the show.
或者你当然也可以在推特上关注 AG 播客并提问。
Or you can obviously tweet at AG podcast and ask questions.
我每次即将录制时，都会在 AG 播客的推特上发布主题，这样你们就可以针对当期节目的主题提出更有针对性的问题。
I do tweet the topics on the AG podcast Twitter whenever I'm about to record so you guys can ask questions that are more curated for the topic of the episode.
所以，是的，我想我们先从语音留言开始。
So, yeah, I think we're gonna start out with voicemails.
让我们看看大家都有什么话说。
So let's see what people have to say.
嘿，艾玛。
Hey, Emma.
我有个问题。
I have a question.
你对和一个比你矮几英寸、体型小很多的男生约会有什么看法？
How do you feel about dating a boy that's a few inches shorter than you and is, like, way smaller?
谢谢。
Thank you.
我爱你。
I love you.
再见。
Bye.
嘿，姑娘。
Hey, girl.
所以，和一个比你矮的男生约会。
So dating a guy that's shorter than you.
我其实从来没有约会过比我矮的男生。
So I've actually never dated a guy that was shorter than me.
让我想想。
Let me think.
我有吗？
Have I?
让我翻翻我那本记着我约会过的数不清的男生的册子。
Let me just go through my fucking book of all the millions of men I've dated.
嗯，没有。
Well, no.
这是个笑话。
That's a joke.
但我确实曾经对一个男生有好感。
But I actually had a crush on a kid.
那是高中暑假的时候吗？
So and was it summer year high school?
可能是吧。
Might have been.
他和我差不多高。
And he was about my height.
奇怪的是，不知为什么，我并不在意。
Weirdly, it didn't bother me for some reason.
我不知道为什么。
I don't know why.
和比我矮的男生约会，因为我本身也不高，我不确定我是否会真的喜欢。
Dating a guy shorter than me because I'm not very tall, I don't know if I would necessarily love it.
但我认为，归根结底，虽然显然你和约会对象之间的身体吸引力非常重要，我觉得这种吸引力是可以变化的。
But I also think that at the end of the day, like, although, obviously, you know, physical attraction to whoever you're dating is really important, I think that physical attraction can evolve.
假设你遇到一个男生，一开始觉得他太矮了，但后来发现他是个特别特别好的人。
And let's say you meet some guy and you're like, oh, he's too short for me, but then he ends up being a really, really great guy.
你可能会很容易爱上他，而身高最终就变成了一件无关紧要的事。
You could easily fall in love with him, and the height just ends up being something that, you know, it doesn't affect you.
我觉得，和一个比你矮的男生约会，更大的问题在于别人会怎么议论，而不是你自己的真实感受。
Like, I think a big part about dating a guy that's shorter than you is more about what other people are gonna say about it rather than what you actually feel about it.
而且，只要你能尽量做到，如果这男生是个好人，对你好，那就别犹豫；如果他对你不好，现在就立刻分手。
And I think as best as you can, if the guy's a do a good guy is treating you right, if he's not, fucking dump him right now.
但如果他对你好，你就留下来。
But if he's treating you right, you stay with him.
归根结底，别人怎么看你和你的伴侣的外表，根本无关紧要。
And at the end of the day, who cares what anybody else thinks about the appearance of you and your significant other.
这太蠢了。
Like, that's stupid.
但我知道这种事情确实会发生，你知道的，你可能会想，虽然这很蠢，但你还是希望看起来……嗯，配得上。
But I do know that that does happen and, you know, you wanna like, it's it's stupid, but you, like, wanna, like, look like, there's, a no.
我不知道该用什么词来形容。
I don't know what the right word would be.
随便吧。
Like, whatever.
这个社会啊，你知道的，他们制定了一些这样的规则，或者说表达了一些这样的观点。
There's like a society, you know, they made they made these kind of rules about, you know, or they made they said these opinions.
社会已经发声了，他们说男生应该更高一些。
Society has spoken, and they say that the guy should be taller.
但你不需要听这些。
But that's not what you need to say.
我们继续吧。
Moving on.
嘿。
Hey.
我是这个播客和视频博客的忠实粉丝。
I'm a big fan of the the podcast and, of course, the vlog.
我想问一个关于恋爱建议的问题。
Just going with a question about relationship advice.
你对异地恋有什么看法？
What are your thoughts on long distance relationships?
尝试一下还值得吗？
Is it even worth it to try?
你曾经参与过这样的关系吗？
And, have you ever been involved in one?
非常感谢你。
Thank you so much.
总是很愉快。
Always a pleasure.
我非常喜欢这个新的语音信箱功能。
I love this new voicemail feature.
听到你们的声音真是太棒了。
It's so amazing to hear you guys' voices.
这让我感觉和你们紧密相连，我真的对此着迷。
It makes me feel so connected to you guys, and I literally am obsessed with it.
所以我希望你们也喜欢这个功能。
So I hope you guys are into it too.
但不管怎样，是的。
But anyway yeah.
所以我之前确实有过一段异地恋。
So I actually have had a long distance relationship before.
如果你只是随便约会，关系比较轻松，我觉得这实际上可能非常健康。
If you are just kind of dating and it's, like, chill, I think it can actually be really healthy.
因为当你还在成长的时候，能够专注于自己并保持一定的距离，这会非常有价值。
Because while you're growing up as a kid, being able to focus on yourself and have that separation can be really valuable.
因为当你们再次相聚时，这会变成一件很棒的事。
Because then when you come together, it can be this great thing.
对吧？
Right?
而当你们分开时，你专注于自己，这样当你们再次相聚时，这会是一件美好的事，理想情况下是这样。
And then when you're apart, you focus on you so that when you guys come together, it can be this beautiful thing, ideally.
就这样了。
And that's that.
我觉得长途恋爱中特别困难的一点是，如果你在变成长途恋爱之前根本没有约会过，那要和对方建立基础真的会比较难。
My thing with long distance that I think can be really tough is that if you didn't date for a period of time before you became long distance, I think it can be I think it can be kinda hard to create a foundation with said person.
我觉得如果你和对方已经建立了稳固的基础，之后才变成长途恋爱，比如后来因为某些原因不得不分开，那这种情况是可行的。
I think if you already have a solid foundation with said person and they're long distance, they like you know, you guys end up being long distance, like, down the line.
我觉得这样是能行得通的。
I think that that can work.
我完全同意。
I totally do.
但我认为，如果你从未有过非长途恋爱的经历，那就困难得多。
But I think it's a lot harder if you've never not been long distance.
比如，你们一开始就是长途恋爱，因为我觉得要真正了解一个人，必须和对方共度大量高质量的时光。
Like, you started the relationship long distance because I think that you need to spend a lot of quality time with somebody in order to fully know what you're working with.
对吧？
Right?
所以我觉得，当你不能像对方住在附近时那样频繁见面，想要在那种非常私密、深层次的层面上真正与对方建立连接，确实会挺难的。
And so I think it can be kind of tough to fully connect with somebody on that crazy personal level crazy, like, deep personal level when you don't get to see them as often as you maybe would if they live near you or whatever.
但如果你已经有了基础，那你就已经拥有这个基础了。
But I think if you have a foundation, then you already have that foundation.
所以你只是在上面继续建设。
So it's like you're just building up on top of that.
但如果你一开始就没有基础，那就祝你好运了。
But if you don't have a foundation to begin with, good luck.
但是，你知道吗？
But, hey, you know what?
再说，每个人的情况都不一样，对吧？
Again, things work for people, you know?
也许我的经历有所不同。
And maybe my experiences have been different.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
好了。
Alright.
语音留言很有趣，但我没及时在推特上发布问题，所以关于感情关系的问题不多。
Voice mails were fun, but I didn't tweet out the question in time, so we didn't get a lot of questions about relationships.
所以我现在要去推特看看情况如何。
So I'm actually gonna go on the Twitter, and we're gonna see what's up.
我的手机只剩7%的电量了。
My phone is at 7%.
我们看看能撑多久。
Let's see how long we can last.
另外，我很感谢你们在推特上提问。
Also, I really appreciate you guys going on the Twitter and asking questions.
这对我来说太有趣了，我喜欢这种互动方式。
It's been so fun to I love how interactive this is for me.
真的非常愉快。
It's been really enjoyable.
那我们来找一个好问题吧。
So let's find a good one.
好的。
Okay.
这个第一个真的特别棒。
This first one's actually really great.
你对作为一名影响者或YouTube创作者，却希望将感情生活保持私密，而你的生活有99%都公之于众的看法是什么？
Your thoughts on being an influencer slash YouTuber and wanting to keep your love life in private when 99 of your life is always on display for others.
这对我来说确实特别难，因为当你还很年轻的时候，约会很可能不会长久。
This is definitely really tough for me because the thing about dating when you're super young is that, like, it's probably not gonna last.
所以我认为保持私密非常重要，因为在这个年纪，事情变化得太快了。
So that's why I think keeping it private is so important is because things change so quickly at this age.
而且，不管你是想单身，对方想单身，你们俩都想单身，还是关系就是不合适，不管怎样，处理这些事本身就已经够让人精疲力尽了，更别说还要面对别人的评论了。
And, like, whether, you know, you wanna be single or the other person wants to be single or you both wanna be single or it's just not working, like, whatever it is, like, dealing with that shit is so exhausting by itself, but having everybody else comment on it is even more difficult.
而且我觉得，很多时候，大家也会猜测谁和谁在约会，但很多时候——有时候是真的，有时候并不是。
And I think, you know, also a lot of the times too, there's a lot of speculation about who's dating who and, you know, when a lot of the times I mean, sometimes it's true, sometimes it's not.
有时候，当你在互联网上看到任何消息，它可能是真的，也可能不是。
Sometimes, I mean, when you read anything on the Internet, it could either be true or it might not be.
但我认为这很难，比如你经历了一次分手，而且还是公开的。
But I think it's hard because like, let's say you go through a breakup and then it was public.
因为我从未有过任何公开的关系。
Because I've never had a public relationship ever.
所以，我只是在基于我自己的推测来说话。
So, I mean, I'm just kind of speaking from what I would assume.
比如，你和某人分手了，然后你得告诉所有人：‘嘿，我们分手了。’
Like, let's say you break up with somebody and then, you know, you have to you know, you tell everybody, you're like, guys, we broke up.
你得在社交媒体上看到关于他们的内容，可能你还被tag了，或者这成了大家讨论的话题。
You have to go on your social media and see stuff about them that you're probably being tagged in or you're probably you know, it's a topic of conversation.
现在你的关系变成了别人的关注对象，这种负担我觉得真的会让人非常沮丧。
And now your relationship is everybody else's relationship, and that's kind of a weird burden that I think is can be really upsetting.
如果我结婚了，我会公开吗？
Do I think, like, you know, if I was married to somebody, would I make that public?
当然会。
For sure.
百分之千。
Thousand percent.
但我最近几年内都不会结婚。
But I'm not getting married anytime soon.
所以在那之前，我可能永远不会拥有一段公开的关系。
So until then, I'm probably not gonna have a public relationship ever.
我的意思是，这要看情况。
I mean, it would depend.
说实话，我觉得除非我跟某人交往了好几年，否则我不会这么做。
I think I would not do that unless I dated somebody for probably, like, a few years, to be honest.
我觉得有时候很难，当你想保持私密，但又想和对方一起做一些事情。
And I think sometimes it's like it's hard to it's hard when, you know, you wanna keep something private, but you also wanna be able to do things with said person.
因为这会让事情变得复杂，你知道吧？
Because then that kind of complicates things, you know?
因为即使你和某人是朋友，也可能会有猜测。
Because it's like, I don't know, like but also even if you're friends with somebody too, then there can be speculation.
如果你和某人经常在一起，别人可能会以为你们在约会。
If you're like hanging out with somebody that people might assume that you would date.
这可能会被解读成各种不同的意思。
That can also look one way or another.
这简直就像一场疯狂的游戏，所以关于我真实的感情关系，我选择根本不谈。
It's like it's all kind of a crazy game, and that's why I just choose to not speak on it really when it comes to my actual personal relationships.
我把一切都保持得非常私密。
I keep them all super private.
我觉得，你知道的，这样反而留了一点想象空间。
And I think I think that's, you know, leaves a little bit to the imagination.
对吧？
Right?
还挺有趣的。
It's kind of fun.
但，是的，我不确定。
But, yeah, I don't know.
有朝一日，如果我真结婚了，虽然不太可能，但也许有一天我会有个丈夫，那时我就能光明正大地发一张和他自拍的照片了。
One day if I ever get married, probably not, but one day, maybe I'll have a husband and I will finally be able to just post a selfie with him.
我开玩笑的。
I'm kidding.
好了。
Alright.
我们继续吧。
Let's move on.
你有没有过一段如此认真的关系，以至于你和伴侣会互相说‘我爱你’？
Have you ever had a relationship so serious that you and your significant other would say, love you?
是的，我有过。
Yes, I have.
下一个。
Next.
和前任做朋友可能吗？
Is it possible to be friends with your exes?
我认为这取决于你们之前的关系类型。
I think it depends on what type of relationship you had.
如果他们伤害了你，或者你伤害了他们，我觉得你们最终还是可以成为朋友的，但我觉得从这种伤害中愈合和原谅确实需要很长时间。
If they did something to hurt you, or you did something to hurt them, I think that you can eventually be friends with them, but I think it does take a lot of time to heal from that and forgive.
因为当你和某人约会时，如果他们做了伤害你的事，那种愤怒往往比和朋友之间的冲突更强烈。
Because when somebody that you date, I think, does something that that hurts you, it can be really I think the anger in that is so much more intense than even with, like, friends sometimes.
因为有时候，尤其是在一段深刻的关系中，那种爱的强度是非常强烈的。
Because there's, like, such an intense kind of, like, love there sometimes depending on the relationship.
但你知道，是的。
But, you know, yeah.
我觉得你们可以成为朋友。
I think you can be friends.
我觉得，说来奇怪，我觉得和前任最容易成为朋友的情况，是你们的关系自然而然地淡出了，双方都觉得想看看其他人，就这样顺其自然了。
I think if I think, weirdly enough, I do think that the easiest way to be friends with your ex is if the relationship kind of faded away on its own and both of you were like, we kinda wanna see other people, and that's kinda how it is.
所以那时候成为朋友就很容易，因为彼此都没有怨恨。
So then it's easy to be friends because it's like, there's no hard feelings.
没有人比对方更心碎，这很好。
Not one person's more heartbroken than the other, and it's great.
但我认为这完全是一种平衡。
But I think it but I think it's all like a balance.
这也需要双方都有很高的成熟度。
It also takes a lot of maturity from both parties.
你们俩能应对得了吗？
It's like, can you both handle that?
因为有时候，和前任做朋友可能会搞砸，突然间，事情就会变得很糟糕。
Because I mean, sometimes being friends with your ex can go so wrong, because then it's like all of a sudden, you know, it it can go really wrong.
所以我认为，如果你曾经有过强烈的情感，那么先分开一段时间，逐渐疏远，然后再重新联系，是非常重要的。
So I think waiting it out, growing apart, and then coming back together later can be really important if you had really intense feelings there.
让我们看看。
Let's see.
你觉得保持一段私密关系健康吗？
Do I think it's healthy to have a private relationship?
是的。
I do.
是的。
I do.
我觉得这样健康得多。
I think it's a lot healthier.
所以，就是这样。
So yeah, that's that.
回答这个问题，我认为保持私密关系更健康，尤其是在我这个年纪。
To answer the question, I do think having a private relationship is healthier and especially at my age.
你相信灵魂伴侣吗？
Do you believe in soulmates?
哦，我想谈谈这个。
Oh, I wanted to talk about this.
是的。
I do.
但这很奇怪，因为我认为你可能有多个。
But it's weird because I think you have multiple.
我觉得你可以有一个朋友的灵魂伴侣。
I think you can have a friend's soulmate.
我觉得你可以有一个伴侣灵魂伴侣。
I think you can have a significant other soulmate.
我觉得它也可能是一只动物。
I think it can be an animal.
我的意思是，我真的认为有非常多不同类型的灵魂伴侣。
Like, I literally think there's so many different types of soulmates.
在我看来，在我眼里，灵魂伴侣就是那种你和对方有一种说不清道不明的默契的人。
I think in my opinion, in my eyes, a soulmate is just somebody that you click with in a way that you can't really explain.
这有点像是某种东西，是的，你根本无法理解。
And it's kind of like it's something that, yeah, you just can't even understand.
我觉得灵魂伴侣是存在的，但我认为这个世界上有许多这样的灵魂伴侣。
I think soulmates exist, but I think that there's a lot of them in this world.
而且我认为，这并不仅仅是一个人。
And I think that it's not just one person.
所以我再回答几个问题，然后就让你们走吧，因为这是我做过的最长的一期播客。
So I'll answer a few more, then I'm gonna let you guys go, because this is the longest podcast episode I've ever done.
哦，这个问题真不错。
Oh, this is a great question, though.
对你来说，关系中的不可接受行为是什么？
What's a relationship deal breaker for you?
我的意思是，有很多。
I mean, there's a lot.
简直多到爆。
Like, a fucking lot.
但我觉得，当一个人特别控制欲强、又不开放时，我已经发现这会非常非常难熬。
But I think when somebody is super controlling and not open minded, I've learned that that can be really, really hard.
我觉得，那些不尊重你的时间、不珍惜你的付出的人，处理起来也会是个巨大的不可接受点。
I think dealing with people that are very you know, that aren't considerate of your time and, like, your and don't appreciate your time and your effort, I think that that can be a huge deal breaker too.
比如，有人就是会把你给忘了，完全能轻易地就把你抛在脑后，你懂我的意思吧？
Like, somebody who kinda just, like, forgets about you, like, could easily just, like, go like, you know what I mean?
这种事真的很糟。
Like, that just sucks.
简直糟透了。
That sucks ass.
而且，如果一个人是个混蛋，我的意思是，如果他很糟糕，那他直接出局好了，你知道的。
And, obviously, if somebody's a douchebag, I mean, they're out, you know, if they suck.
我还觉得，如果一个人能和我进行一场特别棒的对话，我会非常看重这一点。
And I also think if somebody can't I really value somebody who can, like, have a great conversation with me.
所以如果这一点做不到，我就没兴趣。
So if that's not in the cards, I'm not interested.
就是一个有礼貌、整体上很好的人。
Just a respectful overall good good guy.
我觉得我并不难讨好。
I'm not too hard to please, I feel like.
我再回答两个吧。
I'm gonna answer like two more.
你通常是主动提出分手的，还是对方通常先提分手？
Do you normally break up with somebody or do they normally break up with you?
各种情况都发生过。
It's been all of the above.
这些情况都发生过好多次了。
All of it's happened multiple times.
所以两种情况都有。
So both.
其实我也说不清哪种更糟。
And it I don't know which sucks more, actually.
这两种都让人难受。
I can't they both suck.
天啊。
Oh, god.
还能答一个吗？
Can answer one more?
第一次约会有什么好点子？
First date ideas?
没有。
No.
我不知道。
I don't know.
我不去约会，老兄。
I don't go on dates, dude.
这个我帮不上忙。
I couldn't help you with that one.
你怎么知道什么时候该结束一段关系？
How do you know when it's time to end a relationship?
用这个问题收尾真不错。
That's a great one to end on.
我一直在找一个最完美的结尾句来结束这个话题，我觉得刚才那个就很好。
I was trying to find the fur the perfect banger to end this on, and I think that's a great one.
当你和这个人相处或思考他们的时间大部分都不快乐时，你就知道是时候结束这段关系了。
I think you know when it's time to end a relationship when the majority of the time spent thinking or being with this person is is not joyful.
这真的很荒谬，因为很多人处在一段关系里，却根本没意识到自己其实过得非常痛苦。
I mean, it's crazy because I think a lot of people will be in a relationship, and they won't realize that they're actually fucking miserable.
你可能痛苦到极点，但还是会对自己说：‘算了。’
Like, you can be so miserable, but you'll kinda just be like, no.
我觉得我本就应该有这样的感受。
I think I'm supposed to be feeling like this.
不对。
No.
你不应该这样。
You're not.
我发誓。
I swear to god.
这根本不是应有的样子。
That is not how it's supposed to go.
我的意思是，即使你90%的时间都感到痛苦，老实说，我觉得60%的时间就足够了。
I mean, if you're feeling miserable 90% of the time even, like, honestly, I'd argue 60% of the time.
如果你有60%的时间感到痛苦，你就该离开了。
If you're feeling miserable 60% of the time, you need to get out.
如果这种情况已经持续很久了，你就该离开了。
And if it's been like that for a long time, you need to get out.
当然，有些事情是很明显的。
There's obviously things that are obvious.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
如果这个人无论以何种方式都不善待你，那显然是你该离开的直接理由。
If this person is is not treating you right in any way, shape, or form, that's an immediate reason to get out, obviously.
但我说的是那种更难判断的情况，因为原因并不那么明显。
But I'm saying when it's something where it's harder to decide because it's not as obvious.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
我不是说，当有人在欺负你的时候，这甚至都不明显。
Not that, you know, it's even not obvious when somebody can is mistreating you.
有时候，当这种情况发生时，你真的很难察觉到。
It can be really hard to recognize that when it's happening sometimes.
但我的意思是，当你觉得他们其实没做错什么，但你就是想结束这段关系。
But I'm saying, like, when you're kinda like, they're not really doing anything wrong, but I feel like I need to end it.
但我也不确定。
But I don't know.
我指的就是这种情形。
That's what I'm kinda referring to.
我认为，如果你和这个人在一起时就是不开心，
I think it's if you just don't feel happy around the person.
你感觉和这个人合不来，也不觉得他们能帮助你成长，或者让你有新的思考方式。
You don't feel like you click with the person, and you don't feel like they're helping you grow and, like, think differently.
而且你知道，我觉得这就像大脑里一个奇怪的开关，你突然就意识到，一切都不一样了，然后你就断了联系。
And, you know, I think it also is like a weird switch in your brain where you kind of just you kinda know you're like, it's just not the same, and then then you cut it off.
然后你就去寻找新的。
And then you go find a new one.
这有点糟糕。
It's kinda fucked up.
我不确定这算不算糟糕。
I don't know if that's fucked up.
来，开心点。
Like, let's have fun.
随便吧。
Whatever.
所以现在是单身的艾玛。
So it's single Emma here.
她希望你喜欢这一集。
She hopes you enjoyed the episode.
给我发私信。
DM me.
再见。
Goodbye.
不。
No.
我完全是开玩笑的。
I'm totally kidding.
天哪。
Oh my god.
我甚至都没提到过单身可以如此积极。
I didn't even talk about how how being single can be so positive.
你知道吗？
That's do you know what?
去他的。
Fuck it.
我是这么做了，但不像我那样，事情远不止如此。
That's an I did, but, like, not what I there's so much more to it.
但我其实没提到这一点。
But I like didn't I didn't hit that.
所以我本可以，但我没做。
So but I could have, but I didn't.
这没关系。
And it's fine.
我们到此结束吧。
We're ending this.
我其实得去吃午饭了。
I actually have to go eat lunch.
我饿坏了。
I'm starving.
希望你们喜欢这期节目。
So I hope you guys enjoyed this episode.
我其实从这次对话中获得了非常多乐趣，因为我对这个话题有太多想法。
I actually had so much fun with this one because I feel like it's something that I have so many thoughts on.
如果我跑题了，抱歉。
And sorry if I rambled.
跑题广告。
Ramble plug.
但你得习惯了。
But get used to it.
其实我也没那么抱歉。
Not really that sorry.
我希望你能从这次对话中获得一些有价值的东西。
I hope that you got something valuable out of this.
我真的这么希望。
I really do.
这正是我喜欢的类型，你知道的，我不希望聊上一小时，结果大家都觉得：这他妈太蠢了。
That's kind of something I like, you know, I don't want to, like, talk for an hour for everybody be like, well, that was fucking stupid.
所以我希望至少有一些有价值的内容能让你有所收获。
So I hope that there's at least something good in there that you can take away.
告诉我你们希望我下一期做些什么主题。
And let me know what you guys want me to make episodes on next.
在Twitter上给AG podcast发推文，或者拨打我之前提到的号码。
Tweet at AG podcast on Twitter or call the number that I mentioned earlier.
不过我还是再说一遍吧，因为我太慷慨了。
I will say it again, though, because I'm so generous.
号码是(567) 275-3662。
The number is (567) 275-3662.
你可以留语音留言，我们会听——等等，听起来我好像放了个屁。
You can leave a voice mail, and we will that sounded mate, sounds like I farted.
听一下。
Listen.
这是我的耳机线。
It's the cord from my headphones.
大家都别紧张。
Everybody fucking relax.
我这次居然没油了。
I don't even have gas for once.
让我享受一下这一刻。
Let me have this moment.
是的。
Yeah.
发推、打电话，全都做一遍。
Tweet, call, do it all.
天哪。
Oh my god.
这将成为我的新口头禅。
That's my new fucking catchphrase.
咔嚓。
Snaps.
大家都为我的诗发 snaps。
Everybody snap for my poetry.
总之，告诉我你希望我聊什么。
Anyway, let me know what you want me to talk about.
问我问题吧。
Ask me questions.
你知道该怎么做。
You know the fucking drill.
再见了。
Peace out.
我爱你们所有人。
I love you guys.
谢谢收听。
Thanks for listening.
别和混蛋或婊子约会。
Don't date assholes or bitches.
我说了这些会惹麻烦吗？
Am I gonna get in trouble for saying that?
我觉得不会。
I don't think so.
我既可以是个泼妇，也可以是个混蛋。
I'm I can be a bitch, so and an asshole.
guys，去跟好人约会吧，或者干脆谁也别约，自己开心就好。
Date good people, guys, or date fucking no one and have fun.
太棒了。
Love it.
好了。
Alright.
再见。
Bye.
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