第32集：波比跳与搏击

欢迎收听第32期《哥们儿说哥们儿》播客。

Welcome to episode 32 of the dudes spake it dudes podcast.

这不是一个讨论最热门TikTok梗的播客，也不是介绍那些你从未听说过的真人秀明星的节目。

This is not a podcast about the hottest TikTok memes nor is this a podcast that explains who all those reality television stars are that you've never heard of before.

这是一个关于哥们儿打其他哥们儿屁股，以及哥们儿被其他哥们儿打屁股的播客。

This is a podcast about dudes who are spanking other dudes and dudes who are being spanked by other dudes.

本播客由两位哥们儿主持。

And this podcast is hosted by two dudes.

嘿。

Hey.

我是道格。

I'm Doug.

嘿，道格。

Hey, Doug.

欢迎回来。

Welcome back.

这位是斯科特，又名红屁股斯科特或热辣机器人斯科特。

This is Scott, also known as red spank Scott or hot bot Scott.

欢迎回来。

Welcome back.

我们前几期刚邀请过你。

We just had you on a couple episodes before.

如果你还没听过播客第30期，这位道格正是推动创建'热座静修'的主要推手——那是我们在棕榈泉举办的第一个大型...好吧不是第一个大型活动，但确实是我们首个大型打屁股静修会。

If you haven't listened to episode 30 of the podcast, Doug here was the the primary drive behind the creation of Hot Seat Retreat, our first big well, not our first big, but well, our first big spaking retreat from Palm Springs.

那是在三月，世界末日之前。

That was in March before the world ended.

在僵尸末日成为现实之前。

Before the zombie apocalypse was a was a thing.

是的。

Yes.

对啊。

Yeah.

没错。

Yeah.

今天我请来了道格，聊聊关于关系中打屁股的趣事、打屁股幻想以及责任归属。

So I've got Doug on here to talk about some fun stuff about about spaking in relationships and spaking fantasies and accountability.

不过在此之前，我参与了一个有趣的项目，道格也帮忙策划了，现在已经在SpakinTube上线。

But before that, there was a fun thing that I was involved with, that that Doug also helped put together, that just, is available now online on SpakinTube.

我们现在在Hot Seat Retreat的官网hotcps.com上。

We're at the website for Hot Seat Retreat, which is hotcps.com.

道格，给大家介绍一下吧。

Doug, tell us about this.

这是我们几周前想到的主意，觉得在这个不能线下聚会的时期把社区成员聚集起来会很好。

Well, it's an idea we had a few weeks ago that we we thought it would be nice to get the community together during a time when we're not supposed to get together in real life.

然后我们几个——你、我和杰登——一起制作了一个视频文件，大概一小时四十分钟不到。

And, what we did, between you, me, and Jaden, we put together a file, a a video, which ran to, I think, slightly under an hour and forty minutes.

内容包括讨论这个播客、杰登开发WAPs应用的过程、我们在Hot Seat Retreat的经历，还采访了几位社区里的朋友，比如制作男性打屁股视频的STING pictures和Helix（或者你喜欢叫它'spank this'）的团队。

And it was some interviews talking about this podcast, talking about Jaden's creation of the WAPs application, talking about our experience at Hot Seat Retreats, and also doing some interviews with friends of ours in the community, people who produce, you know, male male spank videos such as STING pictures and Helix or if you prefer, spank this.

那只是一次有趣的聚会，我们真的很享受这个过程。

And it was just a a fun get together, and we we really enjoyed doing it.

视频仍然可以在Spanking Tube上观看。

It's still available on on Spanking Tube.

上次我看的时候点击量略超1.3万次，这非常令人欣慰。

And as of the last time I looked at slightly over 13,000 views, which is extremely gratifying.

我们非常感激大家的观看，在当前这种情况下他们似乎也很享受这些内容。

We're we're very grateful that people tuned in, and they seem to be enjoying it in in the circumstances in which we find ourselves.

是啊。

Yeah.

那里有打屁股片段，有些打屁视频是嵌入的。由于SoundCloud对色情内容的限制，有些内容我无法在播客中呈现，比如打屁股的声音。

And there there are clips of spanking there are some spanking clips embedded, and there's something that I can't do on the podcast because of SoundCloud's restrictions on porn is that I can't present, you know, even the the sound of spanking on the podcast.

但Spanking Tube没有这些限制，所以你可以去那里观看。

But spanking tube has no such restrictions, so you're so you can go there and watch it.

你可以看到我留着莫西干发型的样子。

You can see me in my Mohawk.

我决定——就像上期节目第31集里提到的——把压抑的情绪都释放在公寓里。

I've decided, like, for those who listened to the last episode, episode 31, I had, like, pent up here in my apartment.

隔离期间很多男士选择剃光头，但我给自己剃了个莫西干头。有趣的是，不仅烘焙圈的朋友，连同事都给了好评。

I decided to rather than just shave my head like a lot of guys are doing in the quarantine, I gave myself a mohawk, which and then the funny thing happened is, like, people I got compliments, not just not just from people in this baking scene, my friends in this baking scene, but from coworkers.

所以我决定试着保留这个发型。

So I decided to try to keep it.

所以我现在还留着莫西干头。

So I still have the mohawk.

你其实可以在播客节目里看到。

You can actually see it in the podcast episode.

我会非常——不对，我会非常好奇想看看他们重新开业后去理发时会发生什么，以及他们怎么看我，因为我在洛杉矶同一家店理发已经有六年了。

I'm gonna be very I'm not I'm gonna be very curious to see what happens when they go back to the barber after they reopen and how they look at me because I've been going to the same place in LA for about six years now.

对。

Right.

而他们完全不知情。

And they have no idea.

是啊。

Yeah.

所以收听节目是个很棒的选择。

So tuning in was a great thing to do.

这有点像，就像百老汇召集所有歌手通过Zoom视频合唱，但实际并没有唱。

It's sort of, like, it's sort of, like, how Broadway was getting all their singers together and doing Zoom videos where they sang, but not singing.

不唱。

No.

我们这里没有唱歌环节。

There we there's no singing.

不过我们懂的，对。

But we know yeah.

你说得对。

And you're right.

我们收录了一些精彩片段，其中很多来自我们在HotSweet的朋友们。

We have we've got some nice clips in there, and a lot of them are clips from our friends who were at HotSweet.

实际上，它们只是人们私人收藏中的一些物品。

And so they're you know, effectively, they were just pieces of people's private collections.

所以那里还有些人们从未见过的东西，这挺好的。

So stuff that people won't have seen before is also in there, which is which is good.

对。

Yep.

对。

Yep.

他说那里有不同类型的，呃，那里有藤条惩罚。

In different kind of like, he said, there's a there's a caning in there.

有藤条惩罚是因为我是英国人，这是规矩。

There is a caning because I'm British, and that's the rule.

还有皮带惩罚，还有我们的好朋友山姆，用球拍对小男孩们非常严厉。

And there is a belting, and there is our good friend, Sam, being very mean to little boys with a a paddle.

所以各种内容都有一点。

So there's a little bit of everything.

是的。

Yes.

好吧。

Alright.

嗯。

Yeah.

嗯。

Yeah.

所以毫无疑问，你收看了。

So definitely, you tuned in.

真是太棒了。

It was wonderful.

我只是扮演了一个小角色，就是在视频里出现、介绍些内容，还有被简短采访了一下。

I've I've only played I played just a small role of that, just being in the video and introducing stuff and being, you know, briefly interviewed.

但是，真的收到了很多惊人的反馈，我相信你和杰登也是。

But, but very much, you know, I've gotten amazing feedback, and I'm sure you and Jayden have as well.

杰登负责剪辑工作，还有那些数字内容之类的。

Jayden Jayden did the editing and, you know, the digitals, you know, that stuff.

还有道格是我们的组织者。

And and and, again, Doug was our our organizer.

感谢你们两位的付出，这对社区是极大的贡献。

And thanks to both of you guys for doing that, and it's a great, great contribution to the community.

哦，谢谢。是的。

So Oh, thank Yeah.

那么接下来，让我们进入'真汉子说真话'环节。

So with that, let's go to our real dudes spaking real dudes section.

关于道格有个有趣的事，他和他的伴侣杰弗里结婚了。

So an interesting thing about Doug and and is that he is married to a and his partner Jeffrey Jeffrey.

是的。

Yeah.

通常都叫他杰弗里。

Typically referred to Jeffrey.

是的。

Yes.

确实如此。

Exactly.

我总对那些想了解的人说，我的生活简直就像《弗尔蒂旅馆》里的巴兹尔或西比尔·弗尔蒂，尤其是她模仿巴兹尔时的样子。

I I I always tell people for anyone who wants to reference, I spend my life like rather like Basil or Sybil Fawlty in Fawlty Towers when she used to go Basil.

于是我就发现自己对杰夫说话时不由自主用了这种语气。

And and my that that's how that's the tone of voice I find myself adopting with Jeff.

杰弗里。

Jeffrey.

没错。

Yes.

而且杰弗里也是打屁股文化的狂热爱好者，在圈内非常有名，我们常拿这个开玩笑。

And Jeffrey is also very much into spaking, very well known in the community, and and we make that joke.

杰弗里就像是...终极熊孩子中的王者。

Jeffrey is the he is, like, the the uber the uber brat.

他简直就是其他打屁股爱好者争相模仿的熊孩子典范。

He is, like, the brat that other spanking brats attempt to emulate.

我知道。

I know.

确实。

I've yeah.

我以前也跟别人这么说过。

And I've I've I've said that to people before.

所以你一直在跟杰弗里学习，对吧？

So you're you're you've been learning from Jeffrey, haven't you?

我想到的是，从播客收到的反馈中，经常有人好奇与同样喜欢打屁股的人谈恋爱是什么体验，如何相处，以及如何协商这类事情。

And so I thought so one of the things that I hear I've heard occasionally some of the feedback I've gotten for the podcast is people are very curious about what it's like to be in a relationship with someone else into spanking, how that works out, how you negotiate things.

道格，既然你上过播客，我觉得你是最合适的人选来聊聊这种关系中的体验——如何与伴侣相处，如何安排与其他人的游戏环节等等。

And and I thought, you know, Doug, since you've been on the podcast, you'd be an excellent person to talk about the experience of be what it's like to be in a relationship with another person in this making, how you navigate certain things, and arrange, you know, play sessions with other people and all that sort of things.

真酷。

So Cool.

是啊。

Yeah.

那么首先，你是怎么认识杰弗里的？又是怎么熟悉起来的？

So so first of how did you how did you meet Jeffrey, you know, and and how did you get to know him?

我们是在洛杉矶打屁股派对上认识的，老听众都知道那个叫'月燃'的派对。

Well, we we met at the Los Angeles Spank Party, which as many of you know was is Moonburn.

最早是二十年前——准确说应该是二十一年前——我们有过一面之缘。

We originally encountered each other briefly, I'm I wanna say at least twenty years ago, probably twenty one years ago, a brief encounter.

后来有段时间，'月燃'派对改在私人住宅举办，老会员可能还记得。

And then there was a period that the the moon burn attendee old timers may recall where the party was being held actually in a private residence.

我记得是在阿尔塔迪纳。

I believe it was in Altadena.

我们就是在那次派对上重逢的。

And it was that we met there for the second time.

大概隔了两年左右，那次我们交换了电话号码。

I wanna say it was about two years later, and it was at that point that we swapped numbers.

你知道，经过中间短短几年的相处，我们在2008年结婚了。

And, you know, the after a brief period of some years in the middle, we find ourselves married in 2008.

但我们最初是在Moonburn相识的。

But it was originally at Moonburn that we that we met each other.

那么当你们彼此了解时，最让人好奇的是什么？是什么让你们一拍即合？

So so as you got to know each other, one of the things that's very curious about, what sort of what clicked?

因为你知道，我已经连续多年去Moonburn了。

Because I have you know, there I've I've been to move going to Moonburn for years.

那里有些家伙我很喜欢打屁股。

You know, there are guys there that I love to spank.

也有些家伙我很喜欢被他们打屁股。

There are guys that I love to be spanked by.

那么除了'哦，这是我想打屁股的人'之外，是什么让你们的关系升华到'这是我想共度一生的人'的程度？

And so what was it that clicked beyond saying, oh, this is somebody I I'd like to spank to this is somebody that I might want to, you know, share my life with outside of above and beyond just spanking play?

嗯，我是说，杰夫和我在方方面面都很合拍。

Well, I mean, Jeff and I, we're we're compatible in in all sorts of ways.

打屁股这部分当然很重要。

The the spanking part is important.

作为打屁股的主导方，我对情色风格和惩戒风格的打屁股都乐在其中，而这两种方式我都在杰夫身上实践过。

I mean, as a spanking top, I'm equally happy with erotic style spanking and discipline style spanking, and and I do both of those things with Jeff.

偶尔，你知道，当杰弗里在家里调皮捣蛋时，这就只是个'该收拾了'的问题。

I mean, occasionally, you know, he's you know, Jeffrey's being bratty around the house, and I it's just a question of, right.

就是这样。

That's it.

我我走到地板上，抽出一块板子，然后，你知道的，我我我把他按在膝盖上。

And I I go to the floor, and I pull out a paddle, and and, you know, and I and I and I take him over my knee.

但除此之外，我们，你知道的，我们在各方面都很合拍，对戏剧和喜欢做的事情有着许多共同的兴趣。

But, yeah, beyond that, we're, you know, we're compatible in all sorts of ways, and we have all sorts of similar interests with regards to theater and the things that we like to do.

我们之间有很多共同点，你知道的，也有很多我们都不感兴趣的东西。

There's all we have you know, a lot of things we're not interested in we have in common.

我们俩对现代文化都一无所知，你知道吗？

Neither of us know anything about modern culture and you know?

我是说，你你你一开始提到了TikTok之类的。

I mean, you you you mentioned at the start something about TikTok and something else.

是啊。

Yeah.

我们俩都不知道那是什么，所以在这方面我们很合拍。

Neither of us know what that is, so we have great compatibility there.

不过，不，我觉得对我来说，你知道的，打屁股在生活中占了很大比重，所以找到一个和我有相同爱好的人很重要。

But, no, it's I I think for for me, it you know, spanking fit figures enough prominently in my life that for someone to be similarly to me into it was was important.

那那那对我来说很重要。

That that was that was important for me.

嗯。

Yeah.

我我之所以知道TikTok，是因为我发现有些玩龙与地下城的可爱男生会发TikTok视频，所以我一直在追踪他们。

I I only know about TikTok because I've discovered that these really cute guys who like to play dungeons and dragons who do TikTok videos, and so I've been tracking I've been tracking them down.

那么，和你之前没有这种打屁股默契的伴侣相比，这段关系感觉如何？

So but so is how does it compare to you know, have you been in a relationship with someone who you didn't have that spaky connection with first?

我认为在某种程度上，我的视角与大众的普遍经历有所不同。

I think relatively uniquely in in, you know, the peep people's general experience.

对我来说，迄今为止唯一有过任何形式关系的人就是杰夫。

For me, the only relationship of any description I've ever been with has been with Jeff.

所以我的意思是，大多数人生命中都至少有过一位前任。

So so I'm I'm a little I mean, most people have an x, you know, in in their life.

而我没有。

I don't.

但正如我所说，我们的契合度非常完美。

But like I say, the our compatibility is is wonderful.

我们——如你所知——很享受在洛杉矶的家中举办打屁股爱好者聚会。

We we we enjoy, as as you know, hosting get togethers of spank friends at at our place here in in LA.

从来没有。

No.

我从未经历过不包含打屁股元素的亲密关系。

I I've I've never been in a relationship with someone where there was no spanking.

所以从这个角度来说，我确实缺乏...呃...对比的参照系。

So I I I don't have a a good, you know, a good sense of it from that point of view.

那么你是一直抱有这种观念吗？比如‘如果要恋爱，对方必须接受打屁股’？

Now did you always have that feeling like if I'm going to get into a relationship with someone, it needs to be someone that's into spanking?

我倒不认为我有什么先入为主的想法。

I don't think I had any sort of preconceived notions.

如今在见识过两种类型的关系后，我逐渐意识到...嗯...打屁股在我的生活中占据着如此重要的位置，如果缺失这个元素会显得很别扭。

I I now that I've, you know, seen I've seen both types of relationships, I've I've I've somewhat come to the conclusion in in my life that, you know, that that spanking figures prominently enough in my life that it would be a bit awkward.

与一个生活中完全没有打屁股元素的人建立关系，确实需要克服一些障碍。

It would be a bit of a hurdle to overcome to be in a relationship with someone with that spanking didn't feature in their life at all.

如果要我猜测的话，大多数人对于打屁股的重视程度可能处于一个连续区间上，而这种重视程度会关系到他们是否希望伴侣也对此感兴趣。

And I if I had to guess, I would say that most people are probably on a on a scale or continuum of how important spanking is to them, and and that would would relate to how important it is that their partner is also into into spanking.

我想，这大概就是我的推测吧。

I mean, that would that would be my my guess, I suppose.

是啊。

Yeah.

因为我们都知道有些长期伴侣中，一方喜欢打屁股而另一方不感兴趣。

Because we and we both know guys who are in long term relationships with partners that they're committed to where one was into spanking and the other one is not.

我一直很想邀请其中一位来聊聊。

And I'd love to get one of those guys I've been asking.

你愿意来播客节目吗？

You wanna come to the podcast?

如果你正在听并且愿意分享，我很想邀请处于这种'混合癖好婚姻'中的人来谈谈他们如何协调。

If you're out there and you're willing to talk, I'd love to get someone who's in a a mixed marriage, so to speak, a mixed fetish marriage to talk about how they navigate it.

不过对你们俩来说——我常参加你们的派对，很了解你们。

But for you guys so I know you both I go to your parties.

我已经好几次把杰弗里按在腿上了。

I've I've had Jeffrey over my knee several times.

没错。

Yep.

你们既会一起玩，也会各自寻找其他玩伴。

You both play with each other, but you also play, you know, separately.

正因如此，特别是你，你是个双性恋者。

So and because you in particular, you're a Switch.

所以当你和杰弗里一起玩时，总是处于主导地位。

And so but when when you play with Jeffrey, it's at the top.

那么你们两人之间会进行怎样的讨论或协商，来决定这种游戏如何进行呢？

So what sort of discussions or negotiations do the that take place between the two of you, you know, as far as your relationship of determining how this play goes on?

我们通常不会对此进行正式的讨论或达成协议。

We we tend not to have a sort of formal discussions or agreements about it.

对我们来说，即使是当我因为被他惹恼而想惩罚他时，这种打屁股游戏依然属于情趣范畴。

I mean, for for us, you know, Spank plays whether I'm trying to discipline him because he's really irritated me and that that it's still play.

要注意的是，在亲密关系中，当你对某些事情真的感到生气时，别让游戏太接近现实生活。

I mean, you gotta be careful not to, you know, trespass too close to to real life when you're really upset about something in a in a relationship.

但对我们而言，打屁股游戏通常带有性暗示。

But spank play for us is normally, you know, set you know, has a sexual connotation to it.

有时候我会打得更用力些，因为确实有某些具体事情让我恼火。

And there's sometimes where I'm paddling him harder because there's a specific thing that I'm annoyed about.

有时候这就像性爱中的拍手游戏一样轻松。

And sometimes it's just it's sort of patty cake in the context of a, you know, of sex.

没错。

Right.

所以从那个角度来看，这种游戏有很多变化形式。

And so, you know, it there's a variation from that point of view.

不太常发生的情况是——他很少会打我屁股。

What what tends not to happen very much is that he tends not to spank me.

嗯，如果我在一个打屁股场景中扮演受方，那种情况下我们之间的兼容性就不太存在了。

For well, if I'm if I'm being a bottom in a in a spank scene, that that compatibility with us is not quite there.

你明白吗？

So you know?

但除此之外，你知道，撇开那个细节、那个小问题不谈，我们在性方面非常合拍，就那方面而言，而且在财务方面也是。

But but apart, you know, apart from that detail, that wrinkle, if you like, you know, we we're we're very sexually compatible as far as that and and as far as banking is concerned.

那你们是怎么讨论或处理与其他人的互动，比如和其他人玩，或者被其他人打屁股的？

Now how do you guys talk about or deal with playing with other, you know, playing with other guys or or spanking or being spanked by other guys?

这完全不是问题吗？

Is it an issue at all?

你们设定了什么样的界限？

Are there are there boundary what kind of boundaries do you guys set up?

我认为问题在于，我们之前稍微讨论过，就是如果那些偶遇发展成情感依恋，你知道，那就会成为问题。

Well, I think the the the issue would be, and we've we've talked a little bit about this, is that, you know, it it would be a problem if there were to be encounters that became you know, that started wandering towards emotional attachments, you know, that you you that would that would become a problem.

但我们很幸运。

But we're we're lucky.

而且在我们做这件事的整个过程中，我从未感到过威胁。

And as much as in the entire time that we've been doing this, I've never felt threatened.

我想我可以很有信心地说，他也从未感到过威胁。

And I I think I could say with some confidence that he's never felt threatened either.

所以如果我不在的时候，他联系我说‘我遇到了一个人’——通常是通过Spankthys、Hookups或Grindr认识的——然后那个人过来打了他屁股。

And so if if I'm away and and, you know, he gets in touch with me saying, oh, I I came across someone on it's it's usually either Spankthys, Hookups, or Grindr, and he came around and spanked me.

而我的反应总是‘太好了’！

And my my reaction is always, yay.

太棒了。

Fantastic.

很好。

Good.

多跟我说说。

Tell me more.

下次记得拍照。

Get pictures next time.

你知道吗？

You know?

而且，当我出门在外时，情况也是一样的。

It's and, you know, when I'm when I'm on the road, it's it's the same thing.

明白吗？

You know?

我遇到了一个当地人，然后事情就这样发生了。

I I came, you know, came across a local, and and this is what happened.

你看，因为我们的关系是在一个公开派对上建立的，从一开始就有其他人参与。

And it's you know, we we because our relationship formed at a a public party, play with other people was there from the start.

而且这几年来，我们一直在我家举办聚会，这已经成为常态。

And because, you know, for a couple of years now, we've held get togethers at our place together, this has always been a feature.

所以我们并不是这两年只和对方玩，然后才需要协商说'我想和别人试试，你感觉如何'这种情况。

So it's not it's not as if we spent two years just exclusively playing with each other, and then and then we had to enter into negotiation about how well, here's here's an itch that I wanna scratch with someone else, and how do you feel about it?

本来就不必那样发展。

It didn't have to evolve in that way.

你知道，这始终是一个从与我们现状相似之处逐渐演变的过程，如果这说得通的话。

It was it was always a, you know, an evolution from from a similar place to where we are now, if that makes sense.

是啊。

Yeah.

那你有没有，比如说，介绍过某个潜在对象，就是那种...你懂的，比如有人说‘我得介绍杰弗里给你认识，你可以把他按在腿上打屁股’之类的？

And have you ever, like, introduced a potential, you know, to have you ever gotten a spanking for some from someone that, you know, is like, oh, I I need to introduce you to Jeffrey, and you can put him over your knee?

哦，经常有。

Oh, very frequently.

对。

Yeah.

嗯。

Yeah.

我是说，通常情况是这样的——我在Spanklist或Grindr上认识人，一般会先单独见面确认对方相对正常。

Mean, that's that's usually what happens is that, you know, I I, you know, meet someone up at Spanklist or Grindr, and I normally sort of meet one on one one on one just to make sure that the person in question is relatively normal.

当然啦，这个标准挺灵活的。嗯哼。

Of course, that's a that's a movable feast that Mhmm.

在打屁股圈子里嘛。

In the Spank world.

而且我每次认识新朋友时都希望，首先能把这人介绍给杰夫认识，其次他们或许能来参加我们家的聚会。

And, yeah, it's it's always my hope when I meet someone that, you know, firstly, that I'm gonna be able to introduce this person to Jeff, and secondly, that they might come around to a a get together at some point at at our place.

这些人里你应该见过不少吧。

And and and you've met many of those people, I'm sure.

是的。

Yes.

是啊。

Yeah.

没错。

Yeah.

我在打屁股爱好者圈子里认识了不少人。

I've met quite a few people in the spaying community.

我想对之前听过这期播客的听众来说，我提过当时没点名道姓说Doug，但Doug和Doug还有Jeff会偶尔在月燃派对后的晚上主办派对。

And I think for those who have listened to the podcast before, I've mentioned I didn't refer to Doug by name at the time, but Doug and Doug and Jeff host, occasional parties, in the evenings, after the moon burn parties.

这个地方一直是为那些因各种原因无法参加正午时分洛杉矶月燃派对的人准备的。

It is a place where it's been a place where people who, for one reason or another, can't really get out to the Moonburn parties because they're in the middle of the day, you know, in Los Angeles.

有时候人们可以来参加Dougie Jeffries的派对。

Sometimes the the people could come out to Dougie Jeffries parties.

因此我在打屁股圈里遇到了一些从没在月燃派对上见过的人。

And so I've met some people in the spanking community that I've hadn't seen at Moonburn there.

确实。

So Yes.

对。

Yeah.

那么你们俩是如何维持这种关系的？在这种关系中你们随时都能进行打屁股活动，或者说在Jeffries这里总有打屁股可玩——尤其是现在你们几乎形影不离。

So how do the two of you keep things you know, in a in a relationship where you're always available for spaking or where Jeffries, you know, there is spaking, especially now since you're kind of locked in together.

你们如何保持这种特殊癖好的新鲜感？

How do you think how do you keep your fetish interest fresh?

因为有些人有广泛的BDSM癖好，会尝试各种玩法，但也有人只对打屁股情有独钟。

Because, like like, there are people who have a broad fetish interest and play in a lot of other BDSM things, but there's also, you know, a lot of people who are just really, really specifically about speaking.

那么，你是怎么保持新鲜感的呢？

So so how do you keep that fresh?

我...我不...好吧，老实说，老实说我不确定我们是否真的保持了新鲜感。

I I don't I well, the honest the honest answer is I'm not sure how fresh we do keep it.

这...我是说，是的，打屁股这件事...我想经过这么多年，我们结婚十二年了，某种程度上确实变得千篇一律，但这是我们俩都真正享受的事。

It it I mean, yeah, the the spanking is I I suppose over the years, and we've been married for twelve years, it does, I suppose, in a way become samey, but it is something that we both really enjoyed doing.

而且，就像我说的，公平地说，现实点讲，当夫妻之间...你们真的生气或有严重问题要讨论时，我们不会...我是说，这不是我们会在打屁股时处理的风格。

And, like, I mean, like I say, just, you know, in in fairness and just to be real for a moment, when when as a couple, you've you've, you know, you're you're genuinely upset or there's a real problem to talk about, I mean, you don't you I mean, it's not our style to do that in the context of a a spanking.

对。

Right.

但我是说，对于那些琐事，你知道的，好玩的事，比如他第四次把洗碗机装错的时候。

But, I mean, with the over the the trivial things, you know, the fun things, like, you know, on the fourth occasion that he's misloaded the dishwasher.

或者...或者我就是没法说服他把纸巾从口袋里拿出来再扔进洗衣机，结果衣服上全是碎纸屑。

Or or I just can't persuade him to take tissues out of his pocket before he puts his puts his shorts in the in the clothes washer, and you end up with bits of, you know, shredded tissue all over the clothes.

这类事情。

That that sort of thing.

这就是个很好的理由说：杰弗里，过来，把他按在膝盖上用板子打一顿。

That's that's a good reason to go, Jeffrey, get over here and and just put him put him over your knee and just let let go with a paddle.

嗯，是的。

And it's yeah.

我想从某种意义上说确实千篇一律，但这是个很棒的开始方式。

I mean, I suppose in a sense, it's samey, but it it's it's a great it's a great way to start.

这对我们来说是个非常非常好的启动方式，而且非常非常有趣。

It's a great great way for us to to get going, and it's a it's a it's a it's a lot of fun.

你知道吗？

You know?

是的。

Yeah.

是的。

Yeah.

所以，你知道，当我通过播客这段旅程逐渐认识社区里更多人时，我最终意识到，尽管我是个双属性（Switch），但实际上我在寻找一个主导型（top）伴侣。

So I've been you know, as I've been making this journey through the podcast and and getting to know more people in the community, I I have eventually come to the realization that, like, even though I'm a Switch, I am actually looking for a top as a partner.

那么有什么建议呢？你知道，与其说我在主动搜寻，不如说是在与人互动中看能否遇到合适的人选。

So what tips you know, like, if and I'm I'm not really doing a search so much as, like, interacting with people and seeing if I find the right guy that way.

你知道，我只是试着保持开放心态，更多地尝试被动角色（bottom），看看是否能与人产生共鸣。

You know, I'm just kind of trying to be open and trying to just bottom more and just seeing if I click with people.

所以，对于像我这样的人，或者任何对自己说'可能想在这个圈子里找恋爱对象'的人——

So so but but for someone, you know, like me or anyone else who's saying to himself, you know, I'm maybe looking for another guy in this baking scene for a potential relationship.

具体需要哪些建议？

What sort of tips?

嗯，我觉得这很难，虽然不想说得太悲观，但你知道，在潜在人群中，真正对打屁股感兴趣的同志群体比例本就不大。

Well, I think that that's it's very hard because I mean, not not to sound, you know, depressing about it, but, I mean, you know, of of the people available, there's a fairly small slice of the gay community who are, you know, who are into spanking.

而其中像你我这样真正热衷于此的人比例就更小了。

And then there's a slightly smaller slice that are, like you and I, are really into spanking.

嗯。

Mhmm.

在这本就不多的人群里，分别属于主导型、被动型和双属性的人更是少之又少。

And then of that relatively small slice of humanity, you know, an even smaller slice will be tops and and bottoms respectively and and switches.

我想说的是，或许处理这个问题的一种哲学就是那种，你知道的，类似于'差不多就行'的哲学。

And I I think what I would say is, you know, perhaps one of the philosophies to approach this at is the is the, you know, something resembling the close enough philosophy.

明白吗？

You know?

我的意思是，即使你作为受方与某人非常契合，而且在其他方面也有很好的相容性，你可能会发现这个人作为施方与你的相容性并不好。

Even I mean, what what I mean is that if you're very compatible with someone as a bottom and, you know, and that and you have good good compatibility with other things, you you may find that this person is not going to have good compatibility with you as a top.

就像我说的和杰夫那样，让杰夫打我屁股对我来说并不太合适。

Like I say with Jeff, be me being spanked by Jeff is not is not really a match for me.

但是，再说一次，我的意思是，你知道的，不是轻率地说，这已经'差不多'了。

But, again, I mean, I've I've just you know, without being flippant, it's it's close enough.

懂吗？

You know?

我会在其他地方满足这种需求。

I I scratch that itch else elsewhere.

所以，但要知道，如果你最看重的是像你所说的那样，在关系中你想作为受方被人打屁股，那么这确实是个很好的起点。

So but to to have you know, if you if you if the most important thing, I think, in a relationship like you were indicating is that you wanna be spanked as as a bottom with someone, then that that's a, you know, that's that's a really great place to start.

可能那个人也喜欢被打屁股，但或许不喜欢被你打。

It may be that that person also likes being spanked, but perhaps not being spanked by you.

可能那个人会觉得，他们打屁股的对象反过来打他们会有点尴尬，不太匹配。

It may be that that other person finds that the person that they spank also spanking them to be to be a bit awkward and not and not quite a match.

就像我说的，你可能会发现，嘿。

And and like I say, you may find, hey.

差不多就行了。

Close enough.

你知道的，那个...那个支配我的人，那个人或许也可能被别人支配。

That you know, my my the person who tops me, he that person can be topped perhaps, you know, by someone else.

是的。

It's yeah.

但是，你要记住，我们这里讨论的只是人类中相对较小的一部分群体。

But, yeah, it's something that you you have to bear in mind is that it's it is a relatively small slice of humanity that we're that we're dealing with here.

明白吗？

You know?

这是个很小的圈子。

It's a it's a small community.

嗯。

Yeah.

我正在努力让自己作为被动方更灵活些，好让主动方在施予惩罚时获得更多乐趣。

I'm trying to work on on being a little bit more flexible on on what I can do as a bottom to make the top enjoy the spanking more.

我在播客里提到过，其实我并不太喜欢...不太喜欢扮演'淘气儿子'这种被动角色。

I've you know, I've mentioned in the podcast is is that I'm not really into I'm not really into daddy naughty boys, you know, as a bottom.

就像...我我我做不到杰弗里那样。

Like, I I I can't do what Jeffrey does.

我永远都做不到杰弗里那样。

I can never do what Jeffrey does.

不。

No.

很少有人能做到。

Very few very few people can.

是的。

Yeah.

因为每当我沉浸在自己的思维空间时，实际上我表现出的却是相反的一面。

Because I like I like whenever when I'm in my headspace, I I was actually the opposite.

我就像个不愿承认疼痛的硬汉兄弟会男孩。

I'm like the tough frat boy who doesn't want to admit that it hurts.

没错。

Right.

但在那时我开始尝试在那种框架下行事。

But at that but I started, like, doing that framework in it.

当我在Hot Seat Retreat为男士们做bottom host时——就是我一直做的这种接待工作——我一开始就说过，你知道，我对计数游戏没兴趣。

When when I was bottoming for guys at Hot Seat Retreat being this this bottom host thing that I had been doing, I was like I've said in the first, like, you know, I'm not interested in doing counting.

我也不喜欢称呼别人先生。

I'm not interested in calling people sir.

现在依然如此，但主导者就是那样。

And that's still the case, but the top's like that.

所以我意识到，好吧。

So I'm realizing, like, well, okay.

这会是个称职的bottom。

This would be a good bottom.

明白吗？

You know?

于是我就这么做了。

And so I did that.

你知道的，我联系了某人。

You know you know, I I called someone.

我倒数了。

I counted down.

先生，我联系了某人。

I called someone, sir.

你知道吗？

You know?

我做了那些让上位者觉得打我屁股很享受的事。

I did those things that made the top feel good about being a top when they were spanking me.

所以我正在努力越来越擅长做这些，而不是仅仅被欺负、被当成混蛋对待——虽然我也会享受那种方式。

So I'm I'm trying to get better and better at doing that as opposed to just be, you know, you know, just bully me and be a jerk and I'll enjoy that.

但后来意识到，也许他们并不享受那样。

But and and then realizing that, well, maybe they don't enjoy that.

这确实是个难以平衡的行为。

That that's that's a hard balancing act.

我的意思是，我也不喜欢倒数计时。

I mean, like, it you know, it it I mean, I I'm not into counting down either.

所以问题是，上位者享受我倒数的程度是否超过我的不适？

So the question is, does the top enjoy me counting down more than I don't enjoy

对。

Right.

倒数？

Counting down?

那么它对我有多重要呢？

And then how important is it to me?

我是说，这只是众多变量中的一个，在试图弄清楚什么对谁最重要时，人们可能会自问这个问题。

That's I mean, that's just one of many variables that one could ask oneself in the in the context of trying to figure out what's what's most important to whom.

是啊。

Yeah.

还有，对。

And yeah.

而我意识到的是，一旦我进入那种底层心态，一旦我有那种感觉，就像我已经屈服了，可以接受痛苦了，那么我就能开始真正变得更顺从，并遵循那类指令。

And what I realized is, like, once I get into the bottom headspace, like, once I've had that feeling, like, I've submitted and I can accept the pain, like, I could get then I could do the I could start being more actually submissive and following orders in that sort of thing.

嗯哼。

Mhmm.

也许我确实应该用一种更粗鲁的方式表现出任性，试着找到——我也一直在努力这么做，但那种态度往往会令某些人反感。

And maybe I actually should kinda do the bratty thing in a sort of a gruffer way, maybe find a and I've been working on trying to do that as well, but that kind of that tends to be a turnoff towards some guys.

比如，他们不想——他们希望一开始就感觉自己在掌控全局。

Like, they they don't they they want to start off feeling like they're in charge from the get go.

所以如果他们想让我有那种感觉，对我来说就有点挑战性，因为我想让他们证明这一点。

And so it's a little bit of a challenge if they if they if they wanna feel that way for me because I wanna make them prove it.

所以我只能，嗯。

So I just kinda have to yeah.

所以我在努力的事情是

So so the thing I'm working on

好吧。

alright.

不。

No.

是的。

It yeah.

是的。

Yeah.

那么，关于与同为打屁股爱好者的伴侣相处，还有什么最后的想法吗？

So any any last thoughts about about being in a relationship with a fellow fellow spaking enthusiast?

嗯，就像我说过的，主要想法就是，你知道，必须像在所有关系中那样保持界限。

Well, like like I said, it's you know, the the the main thoughts that I have is that, you know, you have to separate, you know, like like you do in in all in all relationships.

要分清现实与幻想，并且谨慎对待。

You know, separate the reality from from the fantasy and and and play with it carefully.

我的意思是，我不应该试图把严肃的事情变成一场好玩的打屁股游戏。

I mean, it it wouldn't do for me to, you know, try and make a, you know, a a fun spank scene.

要知道，有些看似好玩的打屁股场景，其实是由我们中一方真正感到难过的事情引发的。

And, you know, they are basically fun spank scenes out of something where where one of us was genuinely upset about something.

而弄清楚这条界限在哪里，正是我们关系中需要不断探讨的课题之一。

And and trying to, you know, figure out where that line is is that the comp one of the constant works of of our relationship.

就像我说的，总体而言，你我都认识一些伴侣，有些双方都是打屁股爱好者，有些则只有一方是。

And then, like I say, generally speaking, I mean, you and I both know couples, some of whom are both spankos, and sometimes only one of them is.

我对大家的普遍建议是：尽量诚实地面对自己，也诚实地告诉对方这件事对你的重要程度。

And I just my my thoughts for people generally would be just to try and be as honest with yourself as well as well as the other person as you can, how important this is to you.

如果你对自己说，这个人对打屁股完全不感兴趣，那么你就需要好好反思一下这件事对你到底有多重要。

And if you say to yourself, well, that here's a person who isn't into spanking at all, you well, you've got a bit of, you know, self reflection to do about how important is it to you.

如果你对自己说，打屁股其实没那么重要。

And if you if you say to yourself, it's not oh, spanking is not that important.

我可以放弃这个爱好，因为对他来说这不算什么。

I could just give it up because that it's not a thing for this guy.

你确定吗？

Well, are you sure?

可能一两个月内还能忍受，但之后这种渴望会有多强烈呢？

It might be a thing for a month or or two, but how how bad is the itch going to be after that?

同理，如果你遇到一个不喜欢打屁股的人，但他们却对你说'作为打屁股爱好者，你可以找别人玩这个'。

And similarly, if if you find someone who's not into spanking, but they say to you as a spanko, oh, you yeah.

你可以去找其他人做这件事。

You can go and do that with other people.

我不介意。

I don't mind.

嗯，是啊，说起来容易，但对方是真心实意的吗？

Well, yeah, that's easy to say, but does the other person mean it?

他们会不会因为不理解而感到被我们威胁？

Are they going to feel threatened by us in a way that they don't understand?

这，你知道，有点棘手。

It's, you know, it it's tricky.

而且我认为，坦诚地评估一个spanko对打屁股的执着程度，以及潜在伴侣对是否允许对方与他人互动来解决这种需求的感受——就像我说的——确实很难把握。

And I think, you know, an honest accounting of of how strong, you know, a spanko feels about spanking and how strong a potential partner feels about them playing or not playing with other people in order to, like I say, scratch this itch, it's difficult to to navigate.

而且，你知道，我希望人们能觉得他们可以联系社区其他成员来讨论这个问题。

And, you know, it's I I hope people would feel that they could, you know, be in touch with other members of the community in order to to talk through it.

你知道的，因为其他人之前也经历过这些。

It's you know, because other people will have gone through this before.

而且，你知道的，这个社区里有资源，有其他可以交流的人。

And there's a there are there are resources of of, you know, other people within this community to talk with about it.

我是说，这就是我会对人们说的。

I mean, that that's that's what I would say to people about it.

是啊。

Yeah.

是啊。

Yeah.

有趣的是——虽然我不确定是否该用‘有趣’这个词——但你知道，现在已经快两个月了。嗯哼。

I the funny thing well, I don't know if I would call it funny, but, you know, it's been now we're we're coming on two months Mhmm.

自从我没有任何形式的性活动以来。

Since I've had any spaking play whatsoever.

而有趣的是，它让我变成了现在这样，目前我完全就是个彻头彻尾的零号。

And the funny thing is, like, is how much it's just turned me into like, for right now, I am just a total hardcore bottom.