平凡中的喜悦

嘿，大家。

Hey, guys.

你们正在收听《女孩们聊聊》播客。

You're listening to Girls Gotta Talk podcast.

欢迎回到《女孩们聊聊》播客。

Welcome back to Girls Gotta Talk podcast.

我是艾莉。

This is Allie.

我是露比。

And this is ruby.

今天我们要聊聊日常中的小确幸。

Today, we're gonna be talking about joy in the mundane.

不过先说说今天吧，今天是雪天，挺好的。

But let's start with like a little Well, weekly today's a snow day, which is good.

我今天直接睡到了十点。

I literally just slept till ten today.

要是今天上学，我肯定就旷课了。

Like, if we had had school today, I would have just missed it.

我昨晚就猜着，应该会……

I just assumed, like, last night I was like, there's

希望今天能放雪假。

just hopefully gonna be a snow day.

对啊。

Yeah.

我们这儿平时没这么冷。

So where we live, like, it's not it's not normally this cold.

外面冷得够呛，才刚……

Like, it is freezing outside for us and it's only

估计现在也就29度吧。

It's probably actually Oh, 29

我刚想去查一下。

I thought Let's look.

特别冷啊。

It's very chilly.

对我们来说已经够冷了，但地上也没结多少冰。

It's cold for us and it's really not that icy.

气温十二度，不过路上也没多滑。

It's 12 degrees, but it's not too icy out.

但一直在下雪，外面看起来就像童话里的雪景一样。

But it's snowing and it just looks like a winter wonderland.

是啊。

Yeah.

真的挺像的。

It really does.

太棒了。

Really awesome.

还有你之前说想申请的那所大学

And that but that college you were thinking of going

或者你打算去的那所大学，叫什么来着？

or are going to, what was it?

一度？

One degrees?

我现在看的这个大学城，气温正好是一度。

It's it's one degrees right now in this college town I'm looking at.

昨天感觉像是零下24度。

And yesterday, it felt like negative 24 degrees.

是啊。

Yes.

实在太冷了。

It's so cold.

天哪。

Oh my gosh.

我简直受不了，真不知道自己能不能撑住。

Couldn't And I'm I don't think I I can handle it.

每天我都要看天气，因为那里冷得吓人，去的念头就越来越低。

Like, every day I check the weather, it goes lower on my list because it's so cold there.

天哪。

So Oh my gosh.

我真的说不准。

I don't know.

走着瞧吧。

We'll see.

我才不去那儿看你呢。

Would not come visit you.

那我每次都得过去。

So I would always have to.

我得跑去看你。

I would have to go visit you.

不过

But

上个周末

this past weekend

周末啊。

Weekend.

今天星期几？

What day is it?

我忘了，哦，星期一。

I don't oh, Monday.

周五我去参观了大学，特别有意思。

So on Friday, I went and visited college, which was really fun.

之后我还参加了一个小访谈。

Then I got to do a little interview.

周六我又去了教会夏令营，能去真好，因为我差不多有一年没去了。

And then on Saturday, I went to church camp, which was really good to get to go because I haven't been in a year or so.

是的。

Yeah.

因为疫情，情况跟以前不一样了。

And it's like was different because of COVID.

就只有一天的时间。

Like, was just one day.

是的。

Yeah.

我们那天从早上八点一直忙到午夜。

Was just one day we went from like eight to midnight.

所以安排得特别满，但我真的很高兴我们去了。

So we really packed it in, but I'm so glad we got

能去真是太好了。

to go.

特别有意思。

So So fun.

我们还有其他更新吗？

Let's do we have any other updates?

没什么特别的。

Not really.

好的。

Okay.

可能你不希望我在播客里提这个，但我刚想起来，你一直没跟我更新过这事。

It's Maybe you don't want me to say on the podcast, but I just thought of this that you never gave me an update on this.

啊？什么？

Oh, what?

你还记得吗

Do you remember

你用铲子弄鸡蛋的那个事儿？

the egg story of you with the spatula?

哦，记得。

Oh, yes.

行吧。

Okay.

你从来没好好跟我讲过，我也没收到任何后续更新。

Never like explained well, like I never got a follow-up on

后来到底怎么样了？

what happened.

这事儿挺有意思的，我觉得你们听听应该会觉得好玩。

So this is a funny story, I guess, for you guys to hear.

每天早上我都会自己煎鸡蛋。

So, at my house, I always make eggs in the morning.

这是我最爱的早餐。

It's my favorite breakfast.

我煎鸡蛋配吐司、菠菜，再淋点辣椒酱。

I make fried eggs with toast and spinach and sriracha.

简直完美。

It's the best thing ever.

前几天我煎鸡蛋的时候，用的那把铲子特别不结实，而且我们家烤箱和台面之间有个小缝隙。

And, the other day, I was making eggs and I was kind of using a flimsy spatula and there's this Our oven, there's like a little bit of a gap in between our oven and the end of our counter.

结果那个鸡蛋就从铲子上滑了下来。

And so the egg like just kind of like wiggled off spatula.

我正想把它铲到盘子里，它却掉进缝隙里了。

I was like picking it up to put it on my plate and it like fell through the crack.

你刚才说铲子晃晃悠悠的时候，我还以为是铲子头会飞进缝里，没想到真是鸡蛋掉进去了。

When I thought you were When you like prefaced the story with the wiggly spatula, I just thought the top of the spatula was gonna like fly in the crack, but the literal egg.

鸡蛋确实掉进去了。

The egg did.

而且我当时已经快迟到了。

And I was already kind of running late.

只好把鸡蛋留在缝里，直接出门了。

And so I had to just like leave the egg in the crack and just leave my house.

那简直就是

That was like the

故事的结尾。

end of the story.

你根本什么都没做。

Like, you did anything.

对。

Yeah.

我回家后，就像个怕挨骂的十岁孩子一样。

Then I went home and like, I don't know, like a 10 year old who thought they were gonna get in trouble.

我跑去爸妈房间，跟他们说：对了，我有个鸡蛋掉进缝里了。

Like I went up to my mom and dad's room and I was like, by the way, I dropped this egg in the crack.

我妈妈说：哦，我已经收拾好了。

And my mom was like, oh, I already cleaned that up.

我妈妈真是太好了。

Like my mom's so awesome.

她就看见了。

She just saw it.

她看见了，然后说：是啊。

She saw it and looked at Yeah.

早上我走之前，试着拿拖把或者扫帚什么的把那块清理一下，

Well, like, in the morning, right before I left, I tried to like take like a mop and like or like a broom or something and like get like it

你那个大吸尘器似的工具，

your big swiffer like

是啊，但我没弄干净，

Yeah, but I couldn't get it.

我妈妈真是太好了，

And so my mom's awesome.

必须给我妈点个赞，

She Shout out to my mom.

她特别喜欢我们给她点赞，

She loves when we give shout outs.

没错，

It's Yeah.

也给我的团队点个赞。

Shout out to my team.

谢谢你，妈妈。

Shout out to you, mom.

她帮我收拾干净了，真是个好妈妈，而我这个不听话的孩子却从不收拾自己的烂摊子。

She cleaned it up for me, like the good mom she is and the bad kid I am not cleaning up my mess.

当时我觉得这事特别戏剧性。

It a lot more dramatic, I feel like, in the moment.

不过想想还挺搞笑的。

I think it's pretty funny to imagine though.

是的。

Yeah.

这算个小趣事，我很高兴听到了事情的经过。

Well, that's a little funny story and my glad I like heard what happened.

因为我一直在想，那个鸡蛋还在那儿吗？

Because I'm like, is the egg still there?

我从来都没听说结果如何。

I just never heard.

没有。

No.

鸡蛋已经清理干净了，各位。

The egg is cleaned up, guys.

第二天，我把奶酪盖子掉到那儿了。

And then the next day, I dropped my cream cheese lid down there.

我觉得那还没清理呢。

And I I don't think that's cleaned up quite yet.

所以现在还躺在那儿。

So Still down there.

我们下周再向你们汇报进展。

We'll update you next week.

是的。

Yeah.

这就是本周的生活更新了。

So that's that's the life update for this week.

好的。

Okay.

那我们进入今天的话题，聊聊日常生活中的喜悦。

So getting into today's topic, we're gonna be talking about joy in the mundane.

就是怎么去感受喜悦，喜悦到底是什么，嗯。

Just kinda like how to have joy, what joy is, and like Mhmm.

你平时是怎么在日常生活中找到喜悦的呢？

How do you like find joy in just day to day life.

对。

Yeah.

所以。

So

我们第一个想探讨的问题是，喜悦和快乐有什么区别？

So our first kind of point we thought we would hit is what is joy versus happiness?

因为很多人说，喜悦不过是更强烈的快乐，或者更深层的快乐，但我觉得其实两者差别挺大的。

Because I feel like people talk about, oh, joy is just a more intense happiness or more deep rooted happiness, but I think it's actually a lot different than that.

我觉得幸福更像是一种短暂的情绪。

I think happiness is more like a temporary feeling, like an emotion.

我不觉得喜悦真的是一种……

I don't think joy is really And an

我觉得幸福可能来自一个有趣的笑话，或者一件新买的运动衫之类的。

I think there's happiness can be found from maybe a funny joke or a cool new sweatshirt that you got or

大多都是来自外在的东西。

Mostly worldly things.

对，这是一种更依赖外界的情绪。

Yeah, very It's a more worldly based emotion or feeling.

而喜悦则更深层，不是来自这个世界上的事物。

Whereas joy is like, in a sense, just deeper and doesn't come from things of this world.

就像你之前说的，那是一种心态。

Like you said earlier, it was a mindset.

对。

Yeah.

或者我倒想说一下。

Or maybe I wanna say.

对。

Yeah.

这是一种看待和对待生活的方式。

It's the way you look at and approach life.

没错。

Mhmm.

我觉得另一点很重要，那就是有内在喜悦的人，并不会一直开心。

And I think another big thing is joyful people aren't they aren't happy all of the time.

是啊。

Like Mhmm.

如果你拥有喜悦，生活中难免遇到悲伤或艰难的事，但你的喜悦不该因此消失。

If you have joy, you're gonna sometimes have a sad thing happen in your life or a hard thing go on and your joy shouldn't just go away.

而快乐则不同，它来来去去，我也说不好。

Like, whereas happiness kind of comes and goes and it I don't know.

是的，那是暂时的。

Yeah, it's temporary.

对。

Yeah.

但喜悦不一样，没人能夺走它，我觉得这就像《圣经》里说的那种东西。

But joy is like, you can never be robbed of it, which I feel like is something, you know, you would say, see in the Bible.

艰难的处境和发生的事，并不能定义你，也不会把你吞噬。

Hard circumstances and things that happen, like, don't define you or consume you.

它永远无法压倒你，也不会完全主宰你的生活。

Like, it can't ever overcome you and it doesn't just completely take over your life.

而幸福因为是暂时的，很容易被取代，但喜悦却无法被取代。

Whereas happiness, because it's temporary, it can be easily replaced but you can't replace joy.

你之前提到过，幸福在我们生活中常常代替了喜悦。

Something you were talking about earlier was how happiness is like a stand in for joy in our lives.

比如，你住着一栋很不错的房子，拥有很多物质财富。

So for instance, you live in a house that is very nice and you have a lot of earthly possessions.

你有衣服穿，有饭吃，有鞋穿，还有这些东西。

You have clothes to wear, food to eat, shoes to put on your feet, and all these things.

所以呢

And so

这些让你开心。

That make you happy.

它们确实让你开心。

They make you happy.

于是你就以为自己是快乐的，其实只是因为这种短暂的幸福感。

And so you think you're joyful because of all because the state of happiness.

是的。

Yeah.

你以为自己有喜悦，但其实只是拥有了快乐，所以这不过是喜悦的替代品。

Feel like you have joy, but it's just be you just have happiness and so you kind of Yeah, it's like a stand in for joy.

是的。

Yeah.

就像你之前说的，真正有喜乐的人，并不是一直开心的。

And like you said earlier, joyful people aren't happy all the time.

我觉得一个很好的例子就是，你常能看到那些传教士，他们把一生奉献给别人，却连基本的物质条件都没有——没有足够的衣服、像样的房子，甚至没有像样的鞋子。

I think a great example of that is just you see people who are missionaries, are giving their lives away for other people, who have don't have those earthly things that make them happy.

他们没有那些能带来短暂快乐的东西，可他们依然充满喜乐。

They don't have lots of clothes and a nice house and shoes to wear, like, but they're still so joyful.

因为他们没有被这些带来一时满足的小事分散注意力。

It's because they're not distracted by all these little things that give them temporary happiness.

真正让他们充满喜乐的，是他们愿意全然付出自己。

It's they're actually giving themselves away, gives them so much joy.

是的。

Yeah.

甚至可以说，最典型的例子就是耶稣的生命，福音书里记载祂道成肉身，活在这个充满罪恶与破碎的世界里，深深融入了罪人的生活和文化。

And even I mean, the greatest example of this would have to be seeing the life of Jesus gospels of how He put on flesh, He lived in this sinful broken world and was very immersed in sinful people's lives and sinful culture.

我想祂一定也经历过悲伤。

And I think he was probably, I mean, he was sad.

圣经里也记载了耶稣悲伤、哀痛的情绪

Like there's emotions in the Bible that you see that Jesus grieved and he was sad

他面对的是人类深重的罪恶与破碎，而他没有逃避，反而直面这一切

And he's about such things such of the overwhelming sin and brokenness Cause like, he didn't run from it, he went, he headed straight toward that.

所以我想，尤其是作为神，看到人这样对待自己、对待他人，该有多心痛啊

So I mean, he probably was so, especially being God, it's like, how sad would that make you to see the way

人们的生活状态

people are

怎么会不让人难过呢？

treating themselves and others?

但他依然充满喜乐

Yet he still was joyful.

是的，他来到世上，就是为了拯救这个世界上罪恶的人

Yeah, and just, he came to this earth on a mission to like, to save the sinful people of this world.

我想，正是这份使命带给了他喜乐

And I think that is something that gave him joy.

而且这份使命。

And that purpose.

对。

Yeah.

我们也被呼召去完成同样的使命，你知道的。

And we're called to the same mission, you know?

是的。

Mhmm.

这根本不是要一直保持快乐。

Which isn't being happy all the time at all.

对。

Yeah.

我们被应许的，本就不是要一直快乐。

Like, we're promised to not be happy all the time.

是的。

Mhmm.

好的。

Okay.

既然我们已经大致讲清楚了喜悦和幸福的区别，接下来我们聊聊怎么在日常生活中真正拥有喜悦——不是什么技巧，就是一些体会。

So now that we've kind of talked about what joy is as opposed to happiness, we're gonna kind of give, not tips, I don't know, just on how to have joy like in everyday life.

对。

Yeah.

这些所有要点里最核心的一条就是，喜悦源于自信。

So The biggest or most like overarching theme in all these is that joy comes from confidence.

是的。

Yeah.

不管是对你所信的、对上帝的认识、对你的信仰有信心，还是如果你不信教，那就是对你自己是谁、是什么让你成为你的那份笃定。

Whether that's confidence in what you believe or who God is, and what your faith is, or if you're not a believer who you are and what makes you, you.

我觉得，对自己有足够的信心。

I think that having confidence in yourself

就像一种内在的安稳，几乎没什么能真正打倒你。

Like the security and nothing can knock me down almost.

对我们基督徒来说，我说的自信是指你是谁、你属于谁，因为我觉得

It's like, well, I mean for us as Christians, I said confidence in who you are and whose you are, because I think

这确实就是关键。

that's really what it is.

我不是属于自己的。

It's I'm not my own.

我的喜乐源自比我更伟大的存在。

I'm my joy comes from something greater than me.

是的。

Yeah.

对我们基督徒来说，一旦你真正明白神是谁、祂为你做了什么，并且信靠这些，你的自我认同就会发生巨大转变，从而在本质上获得安稳。

And so once you kind of find, at least for us as Christians, once you realize who God is and what He has done for you and you believe in that, your identity changes so much and you can become secure in who you are.

当你真正安稳地认识自己，就能感到满足和内心充盈。

Once you become secure in who you are, you're able to like, be fulfilled and have satisfaction.

对，而且还能把这份安稳传递给别人。

Mhmm, and give that to other people.

是的

Yeah.

当你感到满足和充实时，自然就会快乐，而这种充实只能来自你自己以外的东西。

Because like, you have You become joyful when you are satisfied and fulfilled, and you can you can only be fulfilled in something other than yourself.

单靠你自己，永远无法真正满足。只有当你把注意力放在他人身上，才能把这份快乐传递出去，也正因如此，你才真正获得了快乐。

Like, you're never gonna be fulfilled in just who you are, and so then you are able to give that joy to other people, and you have joy by giving yourself away to other people.

我觉得，那些对自己身份缺乏安全感、不自信的人，往往特别在意别人怎么看自己，心里总在琢磨别人对他们的评价，所以很难有真正的快乐。

And I think a way you can see this is people who are not secure in their identity, not confident in who they are, they're very self conscious, there's a lack of joy Because you're constantly picking apart what other people are saying about you and what other people are thinking about you.

他们的思绪全被这些想法占满了。

Your thoughts are consumed with that.

所以，如果你对自己是谁都没底，想要快乐真的很难。

And so I think it's really hard to have joy when you aren't secure in who you are.

我觉得

I think

尤其是，总有人你觉得比你漂亮、比你酷，如果你老在担心别人怎么看你，或者总盯着别人过日子，你的快乐就会不断被夺走——你永远找不到真正的满足。

Especially because there's always gonna be someone you think is prettier than you or cooler than you, and it's always just gonna take away your joy if you're worried about what other people are thinking or you're consumed with who other people are, like, you're never gonna find Yeah.

你永远别想

You're never gonna That's never

这事儿没完。

gonna come to an end.

是的。

Yeah.

有句话说，比较是快乐的杀手。

There's a verse that says comparison is the feast of joy.

那是一句经文吗？还是说搞错了？

Is that a verse or like a It's like a misquote.

让我想想。

Okay, let me

我也不清楚。

I have no idea.

我觉得那可能是句经文，但我可不想说错。

I think it's a verse and, but I don't wanna be wrong.

但这真的太对了，和我们刚才说的完全相关。

But that is so true and has to do so much with what we are saying.

如果你总拿自己和别人比，就不可能有真正的满足。

Just that if you're comparing who you yourself to others, you're not gonna have

我觉得这会导致自我毁灭。

It leads to kind of self destruction, I think.

是的。

Yeah.

我觉得关于日常生活中保持快乐，另一件特别重要的事是，你要明白快乐是一种选择。

I think another thing that's super important about joy and having joy in day to day life is you have to realize joy is a choice.

对。

Mhmm.

人们总说要选择快乐，但说实话，这正是快乐和幸福之间最关键的区别。

Like people always say choosing joy, but it's genuinely I think that's honestly one of the main differences between joy and happiness.

幸福是一种大脑的本能反应。

Happiness is something it's a reaction in your brain.

当你看到有趣的事，或者收到一份新礼物，就会觉得：哦，太好了，我开心了。

When you see something funny or you get a new gift, it's like, okay, boom, I'm happy.

但喜悦不一样，我得主动去选择它。

But joy, it's like, no, I have to actively choose that.

我得去追寻它。

I have to pursue it.

它不会自己跑来。

It doesn't just happen.

是的。

Yeah.

我觉得每天都要意识到，上帝是谁，以及因为祂是谁，我又是谁。

And I think daily it's how we've talked about it's realizing who God is, who I am because of who God is.

然后你就能选择：我是属于祂的，祂也是属于我的。

And like, then you can choose like, I am His, He is mine.

我有活着的理由，有目标，有使命。

I have a reason to live, a purpose, and a mission.

这会带给你真正的喜悦。

And that gives you joy.

这也会让你有动力去帮助别人走出自我。

And that makes you help others step outside of yourself.

因为你有这份信心去做这件事。

Cause you have that confidence to do so.

对。

Mhmm.

那我们接下来是不是可以再多聊聊，怎么在日常琐事中找到喜悦，就像这期节目的主题那样。

Okay, so I think we kinda wanna talk a little bit more about finding joy in like the mundane as we titled this episode.

我马上想到的就是我们现在所处的处境——作为国家，作为世界，我们正经历着充满不确定性的时期，隔离、封锁，各种各样的状况。

And I immediately think of just where we are right now, as a nation and as a world, just we're in this season of uncertainty and, quarantining and lockdown and all these different things.

没有人现在的生活还和一年前一样。

And no one's life looks how it did a year ago.

没有人现在的生活是他们真正想要的样子。

No one's life is how they really want it to be right now.

那你怎么在十四天的隔离期间、远程学习或者在家办公中找到快乐呢？

So how do you find joy in your fourteen day quarantine or, remote learning or working from home?

你是怎么在这些事情里找到快乐的？

Like, how can you find joy in those things?

我觉得关键还是，就像我们说过无数次的，别把快乐和幸福混为一谈。

And I think it comes down to, again, like we've said a million times, not confusing joy with happiness.

不是说我要被各种娱乐填满，或者时刻都感觉特别开心。

It's not, oh, I'm gonna be super entertained and I'm gonna, I don't know, feel good all the time.

而是我要学会安于当下。

It's, I'm gonna be content with where I am.

我要感到满足。

I'm going to be satisfied.

我要学会接纳。

I'm going to Mhmm.

不要总指望靠自己。

Not rely on myself.

我只是觉得，快乐并不意味着你得时刻感觉良好。

I just think it's not we think that being joyful means that you're gonna feel good all the time.

对。

Mhmm.

但即使在隔离中无聊地坐着，我也不会绝望。

But it's, oh, even when I'm sitting bored in quarantine, I'm not despairing.

我依然有希望，有目标。

I still have hope and have a purpose.

是的。

Yeah.

我依然感受到快乐。

I still have joy.

我觉得，只要在日常生活中加入一些能让你扎根、让你认清自我的事情，就能找到这种快乐。

And I think you can find that with implementing things into your daily routine that ground you and who you are.

比如，我是基督徒，我是非裔，我就安心做自己。

So, like, I'm a Christian, I am ruby black and I'm going to, like rest in that.

比如和志同道合的密友聊天，互相提醒彼此所信的真理。

And I'm going to, whether that be like having conversation with my close friends who believe similar things to me and having each other remind each other of truths that we believe in.

没错。

Right.

或者打开圣经，安静地与你的神和救主灵修。

Or opening up your Bible and sitting in devotion with your God and Savior.

这些都能带给你喜乐，让你更清楚自己是谁。

Like that can bring you joy and it grounds you in who you are.

你不需要刻意去追求它。

It's not again, you have to pursue it.

也不用到处去寻找它。

You have to have to seek it out.

它不会自己突然出现。

It's not just gonna happen.

是的。

Yeah.

我觉得我们最后得告诉你：你要主动选择喜乐。

And I just wanna I feel like we need to leave you with you need to choose joy.

明天一早醒来，就选择喜乐。

Like, wake up tomorrow, choose joy.

扎根于你在基督里的身份，坚定地选择喜乐。

Like, be secure in your identity in who you are in Christ and choose joy.

别灰心，就像艾莉说的那样。

Don't despair, like Allie said.

生活不可能总是完美、充满蝴蝶和彩虹。

Like, life isn't always gonna be perfect and butterflies and rainbows.

你得学会，说实话，我也不太确定该怎么说。

Like, you need to like I don't know.

没错。

No.

但希望依然存在。

There's still hope.

依然有目标。

There's still purpose.

依然有一位爱我的神。

There's still a God who loves me.

是的。

Yeah.

好的。

Okay.

那还能说什么呢？

Well, what can we say?

女孩子就得聊聊。

Girls gotta talk.

谢谢收听。

Thanks for listening.

下次见。

See you next time.