ASK THE LADYGANG: STRIP CLUBS, SMOL MEN + NO KIDS?

没人会这样

Nobody Just so

我进去。

go I in.

我太兴奋了。

I'm so excited.

他就说，好吧。

And he's like, okay.

它显示你的皮肤年龄是44岁。

And it's reading that you are your skin age is 44.

我当时就想，什么？我做过面部提升啊。

And I was like, what the I had a facelift.

我不该是这样，他们还说你的皮肤松弛度是……我当时就懵了。

I should not be and they're like, and your laxicity is I was like, what the hell?

我气死了。

I'm so mad about it.

我一直在想这件事，根本停不下来。

I have not stopped thinking about this.

我当时就想，这对我来说真是个大问题。

And I was like, this is a major issue for me.

我的脸怎么可能44岁呢？但我明白原因，刚从海滩回来，晒得太狠了，皮肤损伤太严重了。

Like, my face age should not be 44, but I know why it's because I just got back from the beach and like I so much sun damage crazy.

明白了。

Okay.

我这周的亮点是，我们每人拿到了一千美元。

My good week is that I got us each $1,000.

真的吗？

Oh.

我太兴奋了。

I'm so excited.

我们打赢了一场官司。

We won a lawsuit.

所以当时搞了个集资。

So there was a mass.

不客气。

You're welcome.

我偷偷帮你办好的。

I did it without you knowing.

等等，是那本书的事吗？

Wait, is this the book one?

对，就是那个。

Yes, there was

我之前发给你们的。

that I had sent this to you guys.

你们还说这像是骗人的，是个骗局。

And you said it was like a fraud thing or was a scam.

可能是我从律师那儿拿到的，她跟我说：对了，今天是填表的最后一天。

Maybe I got it from our lawyer and she was like, hey, by the way, it's the last day to fill this out.

所以实际情况是，当我们和企鹅兰登书屋合作时，他们被黑了，本来我们能拿到两千美元的版税，结果没了。

So basically what happened is when we had books with Penguin Random House, Penguin Random House got hacked or something and they took not lady secrets just like a lady or we would have gotten $2,000.

他们用我们的书，还有其他很多书，来训练AI写书。

And basically, they used our book and many other books to train AI how to write books.

是的。

Yeah.

所以我们提起了一起集体诉讼。

And so then we got to sue as a class action lawsuit.

我填了相关表格，每个书名我们能拿到三千美元。

And as part of it, I filled out the paperwork and we each well, we get $3,000 per title.

这笔钱当然要三个人平分。

And we're gonna split it three ways, obviously.

真没想到。

Wow.

我特别兴奋。

And I'm very excited.

我不清楚这个月的钱什么时候到账。

I don't know when the month's money's coming.

我不知道什么时候能正式胜诉，但咱们确实打赢了这场官司。

I don't know when we win, but like we we won a lawsuit.

我真替那些AI感到抱歉，它们居然用这种内容来训练未来的作家。

And I'm so sorry to AI that act like a lady is what's training the future writers of the world.

这就像是自助类书籍一样。

And it'd be like self help.

试着振作起来，你知道的。

Try to, you know, get up.

总之，把卫生棉条蘸上椰子油放进阴道里。

Anyway, stick a tampon on coconut oil on your vagina.

因为咱们在女性权益相关的官司里输得太多了。

You know, because we've had so many bad lawsuits on lady gang.

我只希望能有一次成功。

I wanted to have a success.

我的意思是，三千美元也不算少。

I mean, I $3,000 is not bad.

我们的标题。

Our title.

我就想，你难道不想知道女性的秘密吗？

And I'm like, well, don't you don't want lady secrets?

你知道吗？

You know what?

最低谷了吗？

Rock bottom?

没这回事。

Nope.

总之。

Anyway.

哎哟。

Ouch.

我们回来之后，已经问过那群女生了，但我有件很重要的事要告诉贝卡。

We come back, we have asked the lady gang, but I have something very important to tell Becca.

哦。

Oh.

对。

Mhmm.

出去吃饭会不会让你感到压力，比如吃完之后身体不舒服？

Does going out for a meal make you stressed out, you know, because of how you might feel after the meal?

用了Fodzyme，你就能尽情享受最爱的食物，再也不用担心难受了。

With Fodzyme, you can enjoy your favorite foods without the pain.

Fodzyme是一种无味的粉末，直接撒在食物上就行。

Fodzyme is a tasteless powder you sprinkle right onto your food.

它能帮助分解食物中的FODMAPs——那些容易引起胀气、腹胀和腹痛的难消化成分。

It helps break down FODMAPs, the hard to digest components in food that can cause bloating, gas, and pain before they cause discomfort.

你可以把它想象成针对大蒜、洋葱、小麦、豆类、奶酪这些常见含FODMAPs食物的‘乳糖酶’。

Think of it like lactate, but for garlic, onions, wheat, beans, cheese, and other common foods with FODMAPs.

它能快速融入食物，而且包装小巧便携，随身带着去哪儿都方便。

It mixes into your food fast, and it comes in portable packets you can take with you everywhere.

让我跟你说说。

Let me tell you.

这真是我的新宝贝，因为我特别敏感。

This is my new best friend because I am very sensitive.

每次外出吃饭，吃完我都觉得不舒服。

And when I go out to eat, I don't enjoy the feeling after.

要是胀气、恶心，我干脆后悔吃这一顿。

If I am bloated, feeling icky, I just regret the meal altogether.

用了它，我才能真正吃得开心。

This makes it so I can really enjoy myself.

每位顾客都能免费获得一位注册营养师的一对一咨询，帮你量身指导如何使用Fodzyme。

Every customer gets access to a free product consultation with a registered dietitian who can walk you through how to use Fodzyme for your specific needs.

而且很多人用了Fodzyme之后，吃饭时感觉更自信、更放松了。

Plus, many people report feeling more confident and relaxed around food after using Fodzyme.

现在，你和你的肠胃终于可以好好享受生活了。

So now you and your stomach can go live your best life.

我们非常高兴能与 Fodzyme 合作，只要你访问 icaneatagain.com/ladygang，首单立减 30%。

We're so excited to partner with Fodzyme and offer you 30% off your first order when you go to icaneatagain.com/ladygang.

访问 icaneatagain.com/ladygang，首单享 30% 折扣。

That's icaneatagain.com/ladygang for 30% off your first order.

终于，你可以安心享用最爱的食物，不再受痛苦困扰。

Finally, you can enjoy your favorite foods without the pain.

赶紧去 icaneatagain.com/ladygang 吧。

Just go to icaneatagain.com/ladygang.

你们都知道我对 Nutrafol 的态度。

You guys know how I feel about Nutrafol.

我真心喜欢 Nutrafol，你们也该试试。

I absolutely love Nutrafol, and so should you.

现在限时优惠，首月订阅立减 10 美元，还包邮。

And for a limited time, Nutrafol is offering $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping.

去 nutrafol.com，输入促销码 LGPOD。

Visit nutrafol.com and enter promo code LGPOD.

如果你有掉发、头发问题或者发量变少，Nutrafol 是一种主动应对方案，直击根本原因。

If you've got shedding, hair issues, hair thinning, Nutrafol is a proactive approach and it targets root causes.

长出来的头发，比你天生的还要更好更健康。

The hair literally comes out of your head a better set of hair than you were born with.

Nutrafol 是皮肤科医生推荐最多的护发补充剂品牌。

Nutrafol is the number one dermatologist recommended hair growth supplement brand.

此外，通过 Nutrafol 的订阅服务，你能省最多 20%，还能享受自动配送，再也不用担心忘记吃。

Plus with the Nutrafol subscription, you can save up to 20% and you have automated deliveries, which make it so easy to remember to take your Nutrafol.

让你的头发不再成为你需要操心的事。

So let your hair be one less thing you worry about.

我最近在考虑留刘海，所以更得让头发状态好起来。

And I'm thinking about cutting bangs, and so I really need my hair to be in good shape.

坚持使用 Nutrafol，三到六个月就能看到头发明显更浓密、更强韧、长得更快。

See visibly thicker, stronger, faster growing hair into three to six months with Nutrafol.

现在限时优惠，访问 nutrafol.com 并使用促销码 LGPOD，首月订阅立减 10 美元，还包邮。

And for a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping when you visit nutrafol.com and enter promo code LGPOD.

就是 nutrafol.com，拼写是 n-u-t-r-a-f-o-l，促销码 LGPOD。

That's nutrafol.com spelled mutrafol.com, promo code LGPOD.

你觉得很多蛋白粉都特别粉感重、味道很普通吗？

Do you feel like a lot of protein powders are just really chalky and generic?

我想跟你分享一款我最近特别喜欢的蛋白粉。

I am excited to tell you about the one that I have been loving.

成分干净，味道也特别好。

It's clean, tastes great.

我说的是 Clean Simple Eats 这个品牌。

We're talking about Clean Simple Eats.

我每天早上都会把香草味的蛋白粉加进咖啡里。

I put the vanilla protein powder in my coffee every morning.

真的很好喝。

It is delicious.

这就像早上起来的一点小享受，接下来我给你讲点科学知识。

It's like a little treat first thing in the morning, and I'm gonna give you a little science.

Clean Simple Eats 使用的是草饲乳清蛋白分离物。

Clean Simple Eats uses brass fed whey protein isolate.

品质很高，效果也很显著。

It's high quality and highly effective.

乳清蛋白分离物是一种完整蛋白质，含有全部氨基酸。

Whey protein isolate is a complete protein with a full amino acid profile.

那这到底意味着什么？

So what does that mean?

意思是，每份提供的20克蛋白质，你的身体都能充分利用，帮助维持肌肉、减少馋嘴，促进恢复。

It means your body can utilize all 20 grams of protein per serving to support lean muscle, curb cravings, and aid recovery.

你可能担心乳糖的问题。

Maybe you're concerned about the lactose factor.

Clean Simple Eats 吸收快、乳糖含量低，还添加了消化酶，对肠胃很友好。

Clean Simple Eats is fast absorbing low lactose and made with digestive enzymes, making it easy on digestive.

而且不含任何人工色素、甜味剂或添加剂，如果你喜欢蛋白粉口味多样一些，这正好适合你。

Plus, no artificial colors, sweeteners, or ingredients, and you like a little variation with your protein options.

他们甚至还推出了蛋白粉组合装。

They even have a protein powder variety pack.

你可以试吃多种口味的单份装。

You can try individual servings of multiple flavors.

我就是这么做的。

This is what I did.

味道简直太棒了。

It is divine.

Clean Simple Eats 真正纯净，而且百分百美味。

Clean Simple Eats is undeniably clean and a 100% delicious.

去 cleansimpleeats.com 购买口感最好的蛋白粉吧。

Shop the best tasting protein powders at cleansimpleeats.com.

现在回到女性团体的话题。

Now back to the lady gang.

好的。

Okay.

我们回来了。

We are back.

我之前说过，有好几次半夜醒着，明明困得要死却睡不着。

Now I have laid awake as late I said, laid awake asleep.

自从上一期播客你聊到要给小公主取什么名字之后，我好多晚上都翻来覆去睡不着。

I've laid awake for many nights since our last podcast where you talked about what are you gonna name baby girl Martin.

对。

Mhmm.

我一直想找个名字，能跟汤姆·托宾扯上点关系。

And I have been trying to come up a name for a baby girl that involves Tom Tobin.

好的。

Okay.

因为我觉得我们特别喜欢汤姆，没什么能比这让他更开心了。

Because I was like, we love Tom and nothing would make Tom happier.

他是比尔之后最支持Lady Gang的人。

He's the number one supporter of Lady Gang after Bill.

所以他实际上是Lady Gang的第二号支持者。

So he's actually the number two supporter of Lady Gang.

没错。

True.

我当时就想，得用个带‘Tom’的名字。

And I was like, we need a Tom name.

总不能给女儿取名叫Tommy吧。

So I'm like, well, she's not gonna name her baby girl Tommy.

虽然我觉得这名字挺可爱的。

Even like even though I think it's a cute name.

这名字真的很可爱。

It's really cute name.

挺可爱的。

It's cute.

所以我往下爬了一个大洞，发现有个女人专门研究古老的墓碑

So I went down a large hole and I found a woman who goes through ancient

墓碑上的名字。

gravestones.

哦，像阿巴拉契亚地区的那种？

Oh, like the Appalachian ones?

对。

Yes.

她会找那些当年阿巴拉契亚地区常用的名字，因为我也在全力推贝卡用马丁当女儿的名字。

And finds Appalachian names from back in the day because I did also I mean, Becca, I am full court press for baby girl Martin.

好。

Great.

明白了。

Okay.

我查了一整份榜单，把所有热门婴儿名字都过了一遍。

I went down a list of like, I did all the top baby names.

这太离谱了，各位。

This is ridiculous, guys.

不对。

No.

我之前在那个播客里就跟你说过，最差的就是这个。

I told you this on the on one of the They're podcast the worst.

我太糟糕了。

I am Terrible.

简直震惊了。

Shocked.

还有怎么

And how

Becca，七个n加一个h。

Becca with seven n's and an h.

不对。

No.

是玛莉莎，拼法有两个m，然后啊，天哪，还有好多押韵的名字，我都快晕了。

It was Marissa that has like two m's and then like it's it's the oh god there's like all these rhyming ones that I'm like

我太震惊了。

I'm so shocked.

所以我向你们推荐一个宝宝名字，来自1907年的女孩名——Crilla。

So I present to you baby names I think you should name baby Martin girl From nineteen o seven, I present Crilla.

这让我立刻想到克罗地亚。

It just reminds me of like Croatia.

克罗地亚。

Croatia.

1919年。

1919,

哥特曾经是个名字。

goth was a name.

那时候真有人叫哥特。

People were just named goth.

雅克

Jac.

这名字挺适合你的。

That could be good for you.

挺好看的。

That's pretty

可爱。

cute.

威克姆。

Wickham.

是姓吗？

Is the last name?

不是。

No.

这是名。

It was a first name.

哇。

Wow.

这些都

These are

是墓碑上的名字。

all first names from the gravestones.

我看到过。

I saw them.

蒂尔夫。

Tilf.

贝特鲁德，我知道你肯定不会用这个。

Bertrude, which I know you're not gonna use.

真怪。

Weird.

韦尔科姆这个名字里没有字母e。

Welcome was a name with no e.

嗯，

Well,

这还挺有意思的。

that's kinda fun.

W e l c o m.

W e l c o m.

Welcome.

Welcome.

好吧。

Okay.

Kaldonia。

Kaldonia.

我觉得好像有款身体喷雾叫这个名字，对吧？

I think there's like a body spray named that, right?

挺有意思的，我看到Kaldonia和Bonny Bell这些名字时，还想着这不会是润唇膏的名字吧。

It was interesting because I saw Kaldonia and Bonny Bell as names and I was like, can't like a lip smacker.

那如果你是Bonny Bell呢？

What if you're like Bonny Bell?

那时候Meta还是个小宝宝。

Was also little baby Meta.

Meta那时候是个名字。

Meta was a name.

这太离谱了。

That's crazy.

哇哦。

Wow.

META？

M E T A?

是的。

Yeah.

真厉害。

Wow.

敖德萨，我特别喜欢这个地方。

Odessa, which I love.

是的。

Yeah.

这不错。

That's good.

木兰。

Magnolia.

爱丽丝，不过拼法是 A-L-L-A-S。

Alice, but it's a l l a s.

哦，我有点儿

Oh, I kinda

喜欢这个。

like that.

小雀，我特别喜欢这个名字。

Birdie, which I love.

不是那个植物的Birdie，是B-E-R-D-I-E这个拼法。

Not birdie as in birdie the plant, b e r d I e.

Birdie。

Birdie.

这名字可真流行。

That's a super popular name.

确实。

It is.

我侄女就叫Birdie。

My niece's name is Birdie.

明白了。

Okay.

Ellie Mae，我觉得这名字以前挺常见的。

Ellie Mae, which I feel like was on the list of popular names.

你可以用这个名。

You can have that.

吉利？

Gilly?

G-I-L-L-Y？

G I l l y?

E。

I e.

这名字挺可爱的。

That's cute.

E

I

E。

e.

你也是那种以E结尾的名字吗？

Are you like an are you like an e name?

像比利、吉利这样的？

Like Billy, Gilly?

她可以叫E，因为Martin是姓氏。

She can e name because Martin is the last name.

比如要是叫Martin E，总不能说Gilly Martin吧。

Like if it was Martin e, you don't have Gilly Martin

E。

e.

对。

Yes.

但对我来说，这些名字听起来特别女性化。

But those like for me, it's like those names are very that makes it very girly.

你是喜欢这种女性化的名字吗？

Like are you into a girly name?

这得看具体名字，你知道的。

I it depends on the name, know?

是的。

Yeah.

这完全看名字本身。

It's just as name dependent.

Effie。

Effie.

这名字真可爱。

That's cute.

我喜欢Effie这个名字。

I like the name Effie.

Vesta，我超喜欢。

Vesta, which I love.

Vesta。

Vesta.

V-e-s，Vesta。

V e s Vesta.

听起来像Vespa。

T It's like Vespa.

不错。

Cool.

Vesta 和 Ford？

Vesta and Ford?

太棒了。

That's so cool.

对你来说可能有点怪。

Too weird for you probably.

对。

Mhmm.

Miletta。

Miletta.

哇。

Woah.

Marana。

Marana.

我最受欢迎的一个名字，我觉得特别棒，叫Alsie。

And my most popular one that I think actually could be great, Alsie.

A-l-s-i-e。

A l s I e.

然后你可以叫她Al。

And then you could call her Al.

大Al。

Big Al.

不会吧？

No?

你认识Becca吗？

Do you know Becca at all?

我知道阿巴拉契亚地区的名字确实挺难搞的，但我就是想问，你真确定要叫宝宝Krilla吗？

I know Appalachian names really didn't help but I just thought are you sure baby Krilla?

对，不了。

Yeah, no.

小宝宝克里拉·马丁。

Little baby Crila Martin.

我有个习惯，就是一定要用家族名字，因为这种名字你突然觉得 trendy 可能会后悔，但家族名字不会，毕竟它是家族传承。

I have to do I I have a thing where I'm like, I have to do family names because it's the type of thing where you you you could regret something trendy just out of nowhere, but you can't really regret a family name because it's a family name.

所以它本身就带着意义，不可能让我后悔。

So it's it just it automatically has meaning so that it can't be something that I regret.

我知道，但我以为如果你叫克里斯汀，就可以用克里拉。

I know but I thought if you had a Christine you could do Crila.

不行。

No.

我觉得不太合适。

I don't think so.

不过还是谢谢你。

But thank you.

好的。

Okay.

我们还是说回我画的这个吧

Back to the I'm drawing really

我正在弄这个。

working on this.

不好意思。

I'm sorry.

不用。

No.

挺好的。

It's good.

我相信你已经给不少准妈妈们提供了不错的点子。

I'm sure you've given some people some good ideas out there, some pregnant lady gangers.

我喜欢用身体部位命名。

I do like body abalination names.

我觉得这些名字特别酷。

I think they're so cool.

我觉得这些名字也很棒。

I think they're cool too.

吉莉？

Gilly?

奥莉西是个很好的名字。

Allsie's a great name.

也许不适合叫小马丁，但奥莉西真的特别可爱。

Maybe not for baby Martin, but Allsie is so cute.

奥莉西？

Allsie?

所以……

So

读起来挺难的，你一看见就以为是‘LC’，然后大家都会问：啥？

hard to, like, you read it, and then everyone's like, LC, what?

我不想选一个让人一听就得再问一遍的名字。

What is your I don't want a name that people hear and then they have to be like, come again.

作为一个名字和常见名字很像的人，

Well, as somebody that has

我的名字是

a name that's

和某个更流行的名字很相似。

similar to a more popular name.

我不建议任何人这样取名，比如Alyssa、Alicia这种拼写变体，太难记了，根本没人能记住你的名字。

I don't recommend that for anybody or like a different like spelling Alyssa, Alyssa, Alicia, like those are so hard because nobody's ever going to remember your name.

所以这正是我用别的名字的原因。

So that's like, it's literally why I go by.

Keltie Knight可太懂这个了。

Well, Keltie Knight knows all about it.

非常感谢。

Thank you so much.

Keltie Knight。

Keltie Knight.

凯尔蒂·奈特懂的。

Keltie Knight knows.

明白了。

Okay.

不过，你有更接近一点了吗？

Anyway, are you any closer?

没有？

No?

没有。

No.

我们会继续努力的。

We'll keep working.

好的。

Okay.

我真等不及了。

I can't wait.

好吧。

Alright.

去问问那群女士吧。

Ask the lady gang.

喂。

Hey.

嗨，各位女士。

Hey, lady gang.

我昨天听了那个播客，想问问你们和雅克·贝克威斯有没有给我一些建议。

I was listening to the podcast yesterday and I'm wondering if you and Jac Beckwith helped me with some advice.

我和我丈夫结婚四年了，在一起八年了。

My husband and I have been married for four years together for eight.

我们本来一年多前就开始备孕，但他突然改变主意，告诉我他感到焦虑，还没准备好。

We're supposed to try conceiving over a year ago, but he changed his mind and let me know that he feels anxious and not ready.

过去这一年特别动荡，严重影响了我们的婚姻，我们现在都在接受心理咨询，我也冻存了卵子，因为之前的生育检查结果不太理想。

It's been a really tumultuous year that has impacted our marriage both and we're both in therapy and I've frozen my eggs because I had bad fertility results.

我快四十了，真的很想生孩子。

I'm in my mid thirties and I really wanna have kids.

我担心我丈夫永远都不会同意。

Worried my husband will never come on board.

我该怎么办？

What do I do?

提前感谢你们的建议。

Thanks advance thanks in advance for your advice.

你们总能让我的一周变得明亮起来。

You ladies always brighten my week.

我不明白为什么我会想到这个，但我觉得你可以给他一段明确的时间，之后就不再提孩子的事。

I don't know why I thought of this but I feel like you give him a certain amount of time to where you table the conversation and you tell him we're not gonna discuss babies.

我不会再暗示要孩子了。

I'm not gonna hint at babies.

我们就给自己整整六个月的时间。

You know, we're gonna give ourselves exactly six months.

所以这六个月里，你该干嘛就干嘛，好好想想，也许是一年，我也说不准。

So for six months, I want you to do whatever you need to do, deliberate, or maybe it's a year, I don't know.

但不管定多久，时间一到，你就坐下来，和他认真谈一次。

But whatever that time frame comes up, when the timer, you know, the buzzer goes off, you sit down at the table and you have a real conversation.

如果他还是没一点想生孩子的意思，那你就得好好考虑了，他是不是你真正想共度一生的人。

And if he's still not any closer to wanting to make that decision to have children, then it's a it's time to really start thinking about is this your person.

对。

Yeah.

因为强迫别人跟你生孩子，这事儿从一开始就是个错误。

Because there's nothing worse than forcing someone to have a child with you because that is an automatic you're from the beginning.

就算两个人都特别想要孩子，养孩子都已经够难了。

It's hard enough to have a kid with somebody who wants a kid as equally badly as you do.

我真的很理解你，这事儿确实特别棘手，但你自己清楚想要什么。

I'm very sorry because that's really really tricky but you know what you want.

这事儿一旦做了就回不了头，可你真觉得……

Like this is something you can't really go back on and it's But you don't think

男人有时候就是这样，就像克里斯，我们领养卡莉的时候他根本不想养狗。

men come around like Chris didn't want a dog when we got Cali.

我知道他不是孩子，但一旦你真的看到了，感觉就不一样了。

Know he's a child but like now it's like once you see it you don't feel differently.

不，我觉得如果六个月到一年后，他还是没什么变化，那可能他需要去接受一些心理辅导。

No and I think that he if in six months to a year like he's like not any closer than you know, maybe there's some therapy he needs to go to.

他得弄清楚，到底是什么在阻碍他迈出这一步。

Maybe he needs to figure out exactly what it is that's kind of standing in his way of making that next move.

因为他显然并不害怕承诺。

Because clearly, he's not afraid to commit.

你看，他和你在一起。

Like he he's with you.

他娶了你。

He married you.

他和你已经相处这么久了。

You know, he's been with you for so long.

所以我觉得你应该问问自己，你到底在怕什么？

So I think it's like, what are your fears?

也就是说，有哪些问题是你真正需要面对的？

Like, what are the things we can really get out there?

还有，不管他说什么，都别急着去评判他。

And also like, don't judge him for whatever he says.

不管是什么原因，那都是他的真实想法。

You know, whatever the reason is his reason.

先认可他的感受，但等到合适的时候，你还是得跟他来一次认真的谈话。

So validate it, but then you really do have to have a hard conversation whenever that time comes.

这确实很难，因为……

Well, it's hard because it's

你从来不想给人下最后通牒，但在这个情况下，这可能是你为自己做的唯一选择。

like you never wanna give somebody an ultimatum, but in this situation, that's the only thing that you can really do for yourself.

而且你都三十多岁了，显然也该考虑尽快要孩子了。

And it's like, if you're in your mid thirties, obviously, you probably want to try to start having kids somewhat soon.

所以你就像是被逼着走在一条平时不会有的时间线上，尤其是在感情关系里。

So it's like you are on this timeline that you normally wouldn't be on for something else, like in a relationship.

就像你说的，要么他愿意，要么他不打算继续，那你就得做个艰难的决定。

And it's like, like you said, it's either he's in or he's out, and then you're going have to make a hard decision.

你更在乎的是和他在一起，还是更想要孩子，想要一个完整的家庭？

If it's like, do you care more about being with him or do you care more about having a kid and having a baby and a family?

这种处境真的特别难，因为当初结婚的时候，他们明明想法一致，可后来却变了。

And then it's such a tough situation to be in because it seems like when they got married, they were on the same page and then something changed.

我有个朋友，情况不太一样，他们结婚前就说好了都不想要孩子。

I have a friend who, this is different because they both went into a marriage saying that neither of them wanted kids.

结果结婚几年后，她突然意识到：天啊。

And then a couple years into the marriage, she decided, oh, fuck.

我其实还是想要孩子。

I do want kids.

而且

And

他们有了孩子，现在离婚了。

they had kids, and now they're divorced.

在他们分居期间接受治疗时，他坦言自己对她非常怨恨，当然，她并不是故意的。

And a huge part of, like, their therapy while going through the separation, he admitted to being very resentful to her because, you know, not that she did it on purpose,

但他们原本是有计划的。

but They had a plan.

他们原本是有计划的。

They had a plan.

这是为他的人生规划好的。

Plan for his life.

是啊。

Yeah.

是啊。

Yeah.

但事情也不总是这样发展的。

And it doesn't it doesn't always happen like that.

有时候还挺好的。

Sometimes it's fine.

结果很圆满，大家都挺开心的。

It works out great, and everybody's happy.

不过，唉，真抱歉。

But, yeah, it's I'm sorry.

这确实挺难的。

That's really tough.

我

I

明白。

know.

真的很难。

Really tough.

感觉太难受了。

Feel so bad.

你们在听这个播客，说明你们好奇心很强。

Are listening to this podcast, so I know you've got a curious mind.

这里有个有用的冷知识，你可能还不知道。

Here's a helpful fact you might not know yet.

改用Progressive保险的司机，平均能省下900多美元。

Drivers who switch and save with Progressive save over $900 on average.

整个流程特别简单。

They make it super simple.

上progressive.com，回答几个问题就行。

Pop over to progressive.com and answer some questions.

你会立刻拿到一份报价，保险方案会根据你的需求量身定制。

You'll get a quick quote with coverage options tailored to your choices.

还能看到你能享受哪些优惠，比如在线报价折扣，或者一次性付清的省钱福利。

Plus, you'll see which discounts you may qualify for, like the online quote discount or savings for paying in full.

事实上，99%的Progressive汽车保险客户都能拿到至少一项优惠。

In fact, 99% of Progressive Auto customers earn at least one discount.

换到Progressive，看看你能省多少。

See if you could save when you switch to Progressive.

做出这个明智的选择，你会觉得特别踏实。

You'll feel good about making a savvy choice.

上progressive.com，看看能不能多拿点返现。

Visit progressive.com and see if you can enjoy a little extra cash back.

Progressive意外保险公司及其关联公司。

Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates.

根据2024年6月至2025年5月间新客户的调查数据，平均每年可节省946美元。

National average twelve month savings of $946 by new customers surveyed who saved with Progressive between June 2024 and May 2025.

实际节省金额可能有所不同。

Potential savings will vary.

这条信息专门献给所有爱看电视的朋友。

This one's for all my TV lovers.

我用DirecTV的娱乐套餐，能一次性获得60多个频道，还包括Disney+、Hulu和HBO Max。

My entertainment from DirecTV gets you 60 plus channels and Disney plus Hulu and HBO Max all in one pack.

但关键是这样。

But here's the thing.

我这个娱乐套餐里有这么多好剧，你肯定忍不住想跟人聊你最近看的那些。

With so much great TV in my entertainment, you're gonna want to talk about everything you've been watching.

不过别忘了，朋友可能没你追得那么勤。

Just remember that your friends might not be as well watched as you.

别剧透，鼓励他们也来订这个娱乐套餐，每月只要34.99美元。

Don't be a spoiler and encourage them to get My Entertainment for just $34.99 a month.

去 directtv.com/genrepacks 注册吧，现在就行动。

Go to directtv.com/genrepacks and sign up today.

仅限新用户。

New customers only.

服务按月自动续订，除非你主动取消。

Service renews monthly unless canceled.

需要提供信用卡。

Credit card required.

应用服务需符合相关条件。

Conditions apply to apps.

DirecTV五天试用期结束后，HBO Max基础版（含广告）自动生效。

HBO Max basic with ads begins after DirecTV five day trial.

了解更多，请访问directtv.com。

Learn more at directtv.com.

具体限制条款适用。

Restrictions apply.

你正在收听《女士帮》。

You're listening to the lady gang.

下一个。

Next one.

凯尔蒂、雅克和贝卡，这太离谱了。

Keltie, Jac and Becca, this is crazy.

我好害怕，这辈子都走不出我男朋友比我矮的阴影。

I'm terrified that I'll never get over my boyfriend being smaller than me.

他是我见过最棒的男人，我们关系稳定，眼看就要一辈子在一起了，可我就是忍不住老纠结他比我轻二十磅这事。

He is the greatest man I've ever met, and we're well on our way to forever together, but I can't help getting in my can't help getting in my head about him weighing twenty pounds less than me.

我们都身材不错，身高也一样，五英尺八英寸。

We're both fit and five eight.

他真的特别健硕。

He is just extremely fit.

我要么得学会更接纳自己——他一直很支持我，理解我的困扰，要么就干脆分手。

Either I need to become more secure with myself, he's been supportive of my whole dilemma about this, or end it.

有没有一种可能，我能放下这个心结，而不是觉得这事儿让我无法接受？

Is there a world where the former happens or the later isn't despicable to me?

帮帮我吧。

Please help.

我认识好多朋友，她们都比老公高大。

I have a lot of friends that are bigger than their husbands.

我觉得

I think

归根结底，还是得看两个人有没有自信。

it all comes down to the confidence in both people.

对。

Yes.

有些人，尤其是男人，根本不在乎这个。

Because some people, some men don't care at all.

他们就喜欢丰满一点的女生。

They like bigger women.

他们也喜欢个子高的。

They like taller women.

对他们来说，这根本不是事儿。

It is like a nothing thing to them.

和谁在一起，他们都能自在得很。

They feel confident with whoever they're with.

女生也一样，有些女人根本不在意这些。

And the same thing with women where it's like some like some women just don't care.

他们喜欢那种矮个子却很有气场的男人。

They love like a short king.

显然，她在某些方面有些困扰。

Obviously, there's some like issues on her end.

看起来并不像是

It doesn't seem

她觉得自己差劲。

like This is she's like less.

对，这更像是她对自己缺乏信心。

Yeah, it this seems like more of a she doesn't feel good about herself.

是的。

Yeah.

没错。

Yeah.

我甚至觉得这跟她是否自信没关系。

I don't even think it's her feeling good about herself.

或者可能还真是这样。

Or maybe it is.

我不确定。

I don't know.

我觉得更多是他们两人之间的相处模式问题。

I think it's just more so just the dynamic of the two together.

我完全能理解。

And like, I totally get it.

我以前总是想找个比我高的对象。

I was always a person that wanted to date somebody taller than me.

你可以说这很肤浅，随你怎么想吧。

It's you can say it's shallow, I guess whatever.

但说实话，我也不知道该怎么解决这种问题。

But yeah, it's just I don't know what the solution is for something like that though.

如果这真是个你无法跨越的障碍。

If it like is an issue that you cannot get over.

我们真被难住了。

We're stumped.

你把这群女生彻底问住了。

You've stumped the lady gang.

我的想法是，如果他真的是个完美的男人，而你又对他有感觉，那你就该想，哪怕我只有五英尺八英寸，我还是想和他在一起。

I mean, my thing is is that like if he's the greatest man ever and you are attracted to him, like you're like, oh, even though I five eight, like I wanna have sex with this man.

我真的爱他。

Like I love him.

我对他特别有吸引力。

I'm very attracted to him.

这跟他是比你矮还是跟你一样高没关系。

So it's not about him being shorter than you or same size.

听起来问题其实出在，你需要更自信一点。

It sounds like it's like, I need to become more secure with myself.

那这事儿得靠心理咨询来解决吗？

So is that therapy for you?

还有啊，我就想说一点，男人是越老越有魅力，这真让人头疼。

And then also, like, just one thing I will say is that men get hotter as they age and it's annoying.

你就想啊，如果他一直这样，你们结婚生子了，你产后激素乱套，说不定还胖了十斤、二十斤，甚至更多，

It's like, if he continues to like, be that and like, say you guys get married and you have babies and you're postpartum and like, you know, all of your hormonal shit happens and you maybe even gain 10 more pounds or 20 more pounds or whatever.

那时候你心里真能好受吗？

Like, is that going to make you feel worse?

我觉得你得从各个角度想想，因为——

Like, I think you have to look at it from all sides because

但这事儿太苛刻了。

But isn't safe.

如果这真是唯一的缺点，其他方面他都完美，对你支持、温柔、真心待你，

It's if if this is the one thing like this is the one thing and he is perfect in every other way and he's supportive and kind and cares for you.

你得学会放过自己。

And I need to get over yourself.

就因为这一点，你们分手了，再去别处找个人，

And this is the one thing and you guys break up and you try to find somebody else.

男人真够烂的。

Men are trash.

想找一个那样的好伴侣太难了，尤其是个子高的，因为大部分高个子男人都是骗人的。

It's going to be so hard to find a good companion like that and especially a tall one because tall guys for the most part, are a scam.

他们都是混蛋。

They're assholes.

我们约会的高个子男人多了去了，可他们压根没怎么培养过自己的个性。

They've never had to develop a personality as we all date tall men, but we're we're with tall men.

但说实话，高个子男人根本没传说中那么好。

But for the most part, it's like tall men are not what they're cracked up

就是这么回事。

to be.

你都忘了。

And you forget.

我现在根本注意不到扎克的身高了。

I mean, I'm now I don't even notice Zach's height anymore.

我根本注意不到。

I don't notice.

我不看这些，我只在乎他作为一个人的内在品质。

It's just not something It's that I walk around what I notice is how his his qualities as a human, what's on the inside.

是的。

Yeah.

你明白吧？

You know?

十年后，你和一个六英尺三英寸的人坐在一起，如果他在情感上或智力上没法让你满意，那这个人对你来说就是浪费。

It's really something that you could sit across the table from someone in ten years that's six three, but if he doesn't deliver on the emotional level or intellectual level, it's a waste of a person for you.

如果你太在意别人怎么看，那我有个朋友就是个例子。

And if you're worried about optics of other people, I believe that so I have a really good friend of mine.

她个子很高。

She's very tall.

差不多一米八。

She's like five eleven.

她丈夫大概五英尺九英寸。

Her husband is five nine maybe.

也许吧。

Maybe.

不是的。

No.

我觉得他们身高差得更多。

I mean, I think there's even a bigger height difference.

他特别自信。

He's so confident.

她也特别自信。

She's so confident.

两人走在一起，很自然。

They walk around with each other.

根本没人注意到她比他高。

Not a single person notices that she's taller than him.

比如路人什么的可能注意不到，但对我们来说，他真的特别有魅力。

Like, maybe, yeah, like a passerby or whatever, but they're in our like to us, he's super hot.

对我们来说，他简直太吸引人了。

To us, he's super like desirable.

他真是个绝佳的对象。

He's such a catch.

这根本就不是个问题。

And it actually is just like a non issue.

如果你是担心别人怎么看，那就别在意这些外在的视角了。

It's just such a so I don't think you should if this has to do with other people in the optics of it, like, just let that go.

如果是你自己的心结，那就去调整心态，接受每个人的身体都不一样。

And if it's a you thing, then do the work on yourself to just be like, bodies come in all different sizes.

每个人的身体条件也各不相同。

Bodies come in all different abilities.

你明天可能遭遇车祸，身体就变样了。

Like you could be in a car accident tomorrow and become disfigured.

你脸上的样子，可能跟他眼中看到的完全不一样。

Your face could look entirely different from the beautiful face that he sees.

他会留在你身边，因为他是个好人。

He's gonna stay with you because he's a good person.

我还要说一句，我朋友安娜以前跟我约会时总这么说，说我找高个子男朋友，她说躺下来的时候大家都一样高，就是说在床上的时候。

I will also say as my friend Anna always said this to me when I was dating and trying to find a tall man tall man, she always says we're all the same height laying down, which means when you're I'm in bed.

这根本不重要。

Doesn't matter.

归根结底，我们最后都会变成皱巴巴的老人。

And also we're all gonna become like shriveled up old people at the end of the day.

是啊，我才不会呢。

Yeah, I'm not.

你的皮肤可不这么想。

Your skin says you are.

说得对。

True.

确实。

True.

好的。

Okay.

最后一个。

Last one.

好的。

Okay.

这话说得有点深了。

This is kind of deep.

我和我丈夫在一起七年半了，结婚三年半。

My husband and I have been together seven point five years, married for three and a half.

我们有个八个月大的女儿。

We have an eight month old daughter.

他是个好人，也很勤奋，但一直很看重自己的独立空间和独处时间。

He's a good man and hardworking, but he's always really valued his independence and his me time.

即使有时候很难，我一直以来都很尊重这一点。

It's something I've always respected even when it's been hard.

最近是他弟弟的30岁生日，本来计划要出去玩。

Recently, it was his younger brother's 30 birthday and there were plans to go out.

我完全支持。

I was completely supportive.

但让我印象很深的是，他特意说不会玩到半夜，想早点回家陪家人。

What stuck with me though was that he made a point to say he wouldn't stay out all night and that he wanted to be home with his family.

他没等我开口，自己就说了这些。

He did not he didn't I didn't ask for that.

是他主动提出来的。

He offered it.

说实话，这让我特别感动。

And honestly, it meant a lot.

那天晚上一开始挺轻松的。

The night started casually.

他弟弟和朋友们过来了。

His brother and friends came over.

然后他们开车去了打靶场。

Then they went driving to the driving range.

接着他们叫了优步。

Then they Ubered.

他一直保持沟通。

He was communicative.

整晚都在给我发消息，告诉我他们的动态。

He was texting me, sending me updates throughout the night.

有段时间他说，他们要离开酒吧去吃点东西。

At one point, he said they were leaving the bars to go get food.

我记得当时心想，哦，他们要收尾了。

And I remember thinking, oh, they're wrapping up.

我晚上十点给他发了晚安，告诉他我爱他，然后就去睡了。

And I texted him good night around 10PM, tell him I loved him, went to bed.