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这是iHeart播客。
This is an iHeart podcast.
百分百真人制作。
Guaranteed human.
嗨。
Hey.
我是乔尔。
It's Joel.
还有马特。
And Matt.
来自《如何理财》。
From how to money.
如果你的新年决心是终于理顺财务状况，我们支持你。
If your New Year's resolution is to finally get your finances in shape, we've got your back.
物价仍然很高，经济也起伏不定。
Prices, they're still high, and the economy is all over the place.
但2026年是你该有意识地行动并取得实质性进展的一年。
But 2026 is the year for you to get intentional and make real progress.
没错。
That's right.
是的。
Yeah.
每周，我们都会剖析与你财务相关的情况、最需要关注的重要问题，以及那些能带来巨大改变的小举措。
Each week, we break down what's happening with your money, the most important issues to focus on, and the small moves that make a big difference.
自信地开启新的一年。
Kick off the year with confidence.
在iHeartRadio应用、Apple Podcasts或你收听播客的任何平台收听《How to Money》。
Listen to how to money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
这是梅尔斯医生，《Mailroom》播客的主持人。
This is doctor Jesse Mills, host of the Mailroom podcast.
每年一月，男性们都承诺要变得更强壮、更努力工作，并修复那些破损的东西。
Each January, men promise to get stronger, work harder, and fix what's broken.
但如果真正的努力根本不是身体上的呢？
But what if the real work isn't physical at all?
我与心理学家史蒂夫·波尔特博士坐下来，探讨羞耻、焦虑以及男性从未被教导如何命名的情感痛苦。
I sat down with psychologist doctor Steve Poulter to unpack shame, anxiety, and the emotional pain men were never taught how to name.
一部分是
Part of
走出绝望谷底的方式之一，就是意识到这种情况已经发生，你必须做出选择：是继续留在其中，还是向前迈进。
the way through the valley of despair is realizing this has happened, and you have to make a choice whether you're gonna stay in it or move forward.
我们的两部分对话现已上线。
Our two part conversation is available now.
请在iHeartRadio应用、Apple Podcasts或您收听播客的任何平台收听《Mailroom》。
Listen to the mailroom on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite shows.
看，马特。
Look, Matt.
哦，我明白了。
Oh, I see.
我的眼睛。
My eye.
哦，看那边。
Oh, and look over there.
哇。
Wow.
那是文化吗？
Is that culture?
是的。
Yes.
天哪。
Oh my goodness.
哇。
Wow.
叮咚。
Ding dong.
失落的文化主义者在打电话。
Lost cultureist is calling.
我们今天需要一些笑声。
We needed some laughter today.
哦，是的。
Oh, yes.
哦。
Oh.
像这样的星期，我曾经做梦。
On a week like this, I used to dream.
更好的日子。
Better days.
我曾经做梦，希望永远不要醒来。
I used to dream and I hoped I'd never wake up.
我度过了今年，或者说过去六个月以来第一次美妙的睡眠。
I had my first amazing sleep of, I guess the year, but I guess the last like six months.
哦，我最近睡得特别差。
Oh, I've been sleeping so bad.
你觉得你的良好睡眠归功于什么？
What would you attribute your good sleep to?
不再用眼罩了。
No more eye mask.
不再用了。
No more
哦，你不再用它了吗？
Oh, you're not using it anymore?
这太奇怪了。
It's crazy.
我觉得是因为冬天。
I think it's the wintertime.
这真的无聊到极点
This is so deeply boring to
说这个。
talk about.
那我们就跳过吧。
I Then let's just skip it.
跳过吧。
Let's skip.
需要
Need
不要在这里谈。
to Not talk about here.
不。
No.
不。
No.
不。
No.
别进来这里。
Don't Don't come in here.
我不喜欢你现在的姿势。
It's I don't like the posture that you have right now.
需要一个解释。
Have an explanation.
青蛙婊子。
Frog ass bitch.
你就是只青蛙。
You're a frog
婊子。
ass bitch.
因为我有理由解释我为什么这样坐着。
Well, because I have an explanation as to why I'm sitting like this.
说吧。
Go ahead.
所以，你之前想说的第一件事是什么？
And so why don't we just, so you had a first thing you wanted to say in quotes.
那就是第一件事。
That's the first thing.
萨拉带了一把枪来录音室，而且
Sarah brought a gun to the studio and
这就是她想让我们说的。
it was That's what she wanted us to say.
你最好再问一次我，我有第一件事要说，尽管我们对常驻嘉宾通常不会这样做，但你还是再问一次我吧，我们是怎么定义文化的？
You better, I have a first thing to say, and you better ask me again, even though this is not what we do with our repeat guests, ask me again what was the culture that we say culture is
对我来说。
for me.
你对这个怎么解释？
What's your explanation for this?
我必须这样坐着，因为你知道，我今天来录音室时头上顶着一个三角形。
I have to sit like this because as you know, I came to the studio today with a triangle head.
什么意思？
Means what?
我的头发是三角形的吗？
Because is my hair a triangle?
金字塔头？像《寂静岭》那样？
A pyramid head, like in Silent Hill?
我分不清你是希望我回答是还是不是。
I couldn't tell if you wanted to be told yes or no.
我就只是，不。
I just like, no.
如果你们是我朋友，你们会说：宝贝，你今天确实有个三角形脑袋，但没关系，就坦然接受吧。
If you guys are my friends, you would be like, girl, you do have triangle head today, but that's okay, and just rock it.
或者我直接告诉你你有什么。
Or I told you what you have.
你有的不是三角形的形状。
You have it's not a triangle shape.
这是一个二十面体。
It's an isosahedron.
一个二十面的图形。
A 20 sided figure.
不是这个名字。
Not the name.
因为我念对了。
Because I said it right.
二十面体。
An isosahedron.
靴子。
Boots.
你能查一下吗？
Can you look that up?
二十面。
20 sided.
一个二十面的图形。
A 20 sided figure.
某种厚的东西是一个二十面体。
Something thick is an isosahedron.
天啊。
Oh my god.
该死。
Shit.
我以为你在开玩笑，为了搞笑。
I thought you were kidding for being hilarious
到这一步了。
at this point.
我不
I don't
知道该怎么说好了。
know how okay.
我看到了
I saw
我看到了萨加翁？
I saw sagaon?
我看到了萨加翁。
I saw sagaon.
我看到了电视节目《萨加翁》。
I saw the TV sagaon.
我看到了电视节目《Glow Sagan》。
I saw the TV Glow Sagan.
我看到了电视节目《Glow Sagan》。
I saw the TV Glow Sagan.
前几天晚上我喝了一杯。
I had a drink the other night.
我看到了萨甘。
I saw Sagan.
好的。
Sure.
我们的嘉宾是《周六夜现场》的演员。
Our guest is a cast member on Saturday Night Live.
她以前上过这个节目。
She's been on the show before.
她是我们的好朋友之一。
She is, you know, just one of our great friends.
我们的一位
One of our
很棒，不过我只想说一下简·钱伯斯执导的《房间》的力量吗？
great Although this is, I can I just say the power of The Room directed by Jane Champion?
《房间》的力量，这是我们三个人第一次聚在一起。
The power of The Room, this is the first time the three of us have been in the room together.
不。
No.
知道。
Know.
嗯，你知道发生了什么吗？
Well, you know happened?
我短暂休息了一下。
I took a very short hiatus.
我认为只停了一集。
I believe it was a one episode hiatus.
因为你当时在拉斯维加斯参加凯莉·克莱森的节目。
Because you were you were in Vegas in Kelly Clarkson.
我在拉斯维加斯做我的事，而你是嘉宾。
I was in Vegas doing my thing, and you were the guest.
我当时想，太好了。
And I was like, great.
好的。
Okay.
现在我必须让她明显地转过身来再回来。
Now I have to have her turn obviously right back around and come back.
这真的太疯狂了。
That's actually crazy.
为什么？
Why?
因为有一集你没出现，而偏偏就是你妹妹出现的那集。
Because it's there was one episode you weren't on, and it just happened to be the episode that your sister was on.
我知道。
I know.
那集是
It was
我在长岛。
I was Long Island.
我
I
真的是双鱼座。
really Pisces.
跑步者。
Runner.
双鱼座。
Pisces.
跑步。
Running.
我们喜欢相同的东西。
We like the same things.
猜猜我的事情是去拉斯维加斯看凯莉·克拉克森。
Guess my your thing is going to Vegas to see Kelly Clarkson.
那是你的。
It was yours.
那也可能是你的。
It could be yours too.
你想一起来吗？
You wanna come?
我又要去看莫里亚·夏尼亚了。
I'm going again to see Moriah Shania.
哦。
Oh.
我现在在亚罗。
I'm at Yarrow.
我刚刚才得知自己有空，打算去。
I literally just found out that I'm available and I'm going.
莫里亚·夏尼亚，那是不是说我也有空了？
Moriah Shania, does that mean I'm available too?
或者就像是
Or it's like
是的。
Yes.
这意味着你也有空。
It means you're available too.
你来吗？
You wanna come?
我看看。
I'll see
你在那里。
you there.
来吧。
Come.
等等。
Wait.
拉斯维加斯？
Vegas?
拉斯维加斯输了。
Vegas lost.
我们要玩得特别
We're gonna have such
开心。
a ball.
维加斯，我输惨了。
Vegas, I'm a loss.
莎拉最喜欢的就是我检查这个的时候，可能让人担心的是，她每周都这么说，这周我们又要失忆了。
Sarah's favorite thing is when I examine this, what could be troubling is that she always, every week is going, we're blacking out this week
首先，根本从来没发生过。
By at the after the way, first of all, never once happens.
其次，你猜我要喝多少才会失忆？
Number two, guess how much it takes me to blackout?
可能只要四点二口金酒和塔可就够了。
Maybe four and a half point two sips of one gin and taco.
哦，你根本不是酒量好的人嘛。
Oh, you're you're not a tank at all.
哦，不。
Oh, no.
可不是他们以为的那种谢尔曼坦克。
Not a Sherman tank, as they would like to think.
喝一口就会上天花板吃煎饼。
Pancakes on the ceiling after a sip.
你是在开玩笑吧。
You're kidding me.
这太恶心了。
That's disgusting.
那么，要立刻喝醉吗？
Well, to to black out immediately?
我以为等等。
I thought wait.
‘煎饼贴天花板’意思是你会扔出某种硬物，打到天花板上，然后整块煎饼就卡在那里不下来？
Is pancakes on the ceiling meaning you throw some hard projectile, it hits the ceiling and never comes walloped pancakes whole?
就像随机的酱料。
It's like random sauce.
等等。
Wait.
你为什么那样坐着？
What's the reason you were sitting like that?
所以我就只是，嗯，有点，就像，你根本看不到那个三角形。
So I I could just, like, kind of, like, you wouldn't really see the triangle.
根本没什么三角形。
There's no triangle.
你懂我的意思吧？
You know I'm saying?
哥们儿，
Like, guys,
我会假设
I'd be like, assuming the
叫No.
name of No.
Hystosagon.
Hystosagon.
它的。
Of it.
Hystosagon.
Hystosagon.
她明显说她不会念这个单词。
She clearly Sebecca clearly said she couldn't pronounce it.
她随便在嘴里嘟囔了一堆音节，然后
She threw a bunch of sounds together in her mouth and
希望Rebecca解释一下。
wished Rebecca explained it.
那当然。
That's for sure.
丽贝卡。
Rebecca.
摩擦。
Rub.
我从来没把你当成过丽贝卡。
I've never even thought of you as being a Rebecca.
你才是贝卡。
You're Becca.
我一直都是这么觉得的。
Is how I've always felt.
等等。
Wait.
你的项链根本就和我们不一样。
Your necklace literally not to be like us.
哇哦。
Woah.
她要带来雷贝卡的项链？
She's bringing Rebecca necklace?
因为
Because
我妈妈说，这是她给我的礼物
my mother was like, this is my gift to
以非常拉丁风格的方式。
you in very Latin fashion.
我要送你一条巨大的金项链
I'm gonna give you a giant gold
太酷了。
So cool.
你戴上了吗？
Your on it?
上面有名字吗？
With name on it?
政府名称。
Government name.
好的。
Okay.
太酷了。
So cool.
我总是用
I always go by
贝卡。
Becca.
好的。
Okay.
对我来说这很正式。
It's formal to me.
Rebecca是
Rebecca is
有点像你忘了我的全名是马修。
sort of like how you forget that my full name is Matthew.
只要你认真想上两秒，你就会想起来。
You really think about it for even two seconds, you'll remember.
对。
Right.
但你本来是不会知道的。
But you wouldn't have known.
你不会知道的。
You wouldn't know.
了解一下莎拉·尼科尔的力量。
Find out about the power of Sarah Nicole.
莎拉·尼科尔？
Sarah Nicole?
莎拉·尼科尔应该当你的艺名。
Sarah Nicole should be your stage name.
莎拉·莎拉·尼科尔。
Sarah Sarah Nicole.
那是我的风格。
That's my, like, alley.
你就像是安吉拉·比尔博德。
It's like you're it's like you're Angela Billboard.
我就想看到一张安吉琳的照片，上面到处都是莎拉·尼科尔。
It's like I just wanna see like an Angeline s photo and and like all over it with just Sarah Nicole.
你胸很大。
You big titties.
晃动着你的胸脯。
Rocking I titties
我想要一个刻着‘犹太美国公主’的丽贝卡名牌。
want I want a Rebecca nameplate that says Jewish American princess.
哇。
Wow.
我是莎拉·尼科尔。
I'm Sarah Nicole.
你记得什么吗？
Do you remember what?
那是什么？
What was that?
就是那个。
That was it.
三角形。
The triangle.
我试着把它移开。
I tried to get it out of the way.
我不得不这么做，因为我知道每个人都会说，抱歉。
Just had to because I knew everybody was gonna be like, sorry.
你的读者打开书的时候会看到我
Your readers are gonna be opening the book and seeing that I
有什么？
had What?
首先要找到的是我
To find First of I
我不喜欢拿我们开玩笑。
don't like fun of us.
我不喜欢你那样咬字的方式。
I don't like the way that you You bit?
你每一句话都裹着毒液。
You had poison venom wrapped around every word of that.
你的作家们将会打开
Your I'm writers are gonna open the
今天感觉有点调皮。
feeling naughty today.
所以莎拉今天有点调皮。
So Sarah's I'm naughty today.
所以有一件事我一直无法停止思考，当我们观看《叛徒》新一季时，萨拉已经将这个节目简化为人们彼此之间说的话。
So something I can't stop thinking about as we're watching the new season of The Traitors is Sarah has boiled it down to that show basically being people saying to each other.
什么？
What?
人们彼此说
People saying to each
你这是在作恶。
other this, this, you're being evil.
你这是在作恶。
You're being evil.
这就像是
It's like
所有现实和伪装都烟消云散了。
all reality and like pretense melts away.
我忘了自己在哪
And I forget where
这全是伪装。
It's all pretense.
但就像他们忘了这其实是个游戏。
But it's like they're forgetting that it's a game.
对。
Right.
不。
No.
我喜欢这个。
I love that.
我喜欢当界限模糊、人们真的痛哭流涕、感到被背叛的时候。
I love when the lines blur and people are really crying hard and feel betrayed.
比如，当好吧。
Like, when okay.
所以给交易者们剧透一下。
So spoiler alert for the traders.
如果你还没看过，我们来聊聊它。
If you haven't watched it, we're gonna talk a little bit about it.
当托尼被投票出去的时候
When Tony got voted
了，哦，太疯狂了。
out Oh, that crazy.
你们是叛徒。
Were a sellout.
你是个叛徒。
You were a sellout.
你是个叛徒，罗布。
You were a sellout, Rob.
你是个警察。
You're a cop.
哦，闭嘴吧。
Oh, shut up.
哦。
Oh.
你把他拿捏得很准。
You got him well.
因为当时他太不知所措了。
Year because he was so overwhelmed.
天啊。
Oh my god.
是的。
Yes.
哦。
Oh.
我忘了那位绅士，那位拳击手。
I forgot the gentleman's The boxer.
对。
Yeah.
而且这恰恰体现了问题的核心：人们如果忘了这只是一个游戏，就会真的变得邪恶。
And and that was, like, the encapsulation of the problem, which is, like, people if they're forgetting that it's a game and they're, like, literally, like, you're literally being evil.
我在想
And I'm thinking
你是个冠军。
you're a champion.
你是邪恶的。
Are evil.
你的行为是邪恶的，自从叛徒被选出来之后就一直如此。
And your behavior is evil, and it's been evil ever since the traitors were chosen.
自从艾伦做出选择之后。
Ever since Alan made his choice.
我特别喜欢他们说‘自从艾伦做出选择之后’的时候。
I love whenever they say since Alan made his choice.
好像艾伦·卡明本人真的在做选择似的。
Like, as if Alan Cumming himself is actually picking.
但莎拉所表现出的语气中有一件重要的事，那就是你正在作恶。
But there's something important in the tone that Sarah is embodying, which is you're being evil.
你现在就是在作恶。
You're being evil right now.
等等。
Wait.
男生们觉得，多琳达是在装恶人吗？
Do guys think like, it's like, Dorinda is acting evil
对，多琳达真的在装恶人。
right Dorinda is acting really evil.
这就像是忘记了事实，那就是他们之所以要说艾伦·卡明做了选择的原因。
And it's like forgetting the fact that it was well, that's why they have to say Alan Cumming chose.
是的。
Yeah.
没错。
Right.
所以他们才会记住，邪恶并非与生俱来。
So so that they remember that evil is not inherent.
这是一种建构。
It's a construction.
这是一种建构。
It's construct.
然后他们就陷入混乱，开始哭起来。
Then they get lost in the sauce and they go, like they start crying.
他们会说，我得离开，因为邪恶正在蔓延。
They're like, I have to leave because evil is afoot.
去认为人可能天生就拥有邪恶。
To think that people could possess evil.
你相信人天生就是邪恶的吗，
Do you believe people are born wicked,
还是说邪恶是强加给他们的？
or do they have wickedness thrust upon them?
这其实涉及到我要说的第二件事，是的。
And this actually goes into the other second thing I had to say Yes.
带着枪走进演播室这件事。
With the with the coming into the studio with a gun.
我们甚至不知道你还有第二件事。
We didn't even know you had a second
第二件事。
thing.
对。
Right.
你没告诉我们这个，我们
You didn't tell us this We
只知道第一件事。
just knew there was a first thing.
当我发消息给你们，我说：‘你们什么时候才会问我？’
When I said I texted you guys and I was like, so when are you gonna ask me?
对我来说，文化是什么样的？
Like, what culture is for me?
我们第一次你上节目时就已经问过你了。
We we already asked you the first time you were on the show.
这真是
This is
你的第三个观点了。
your third opinion.
我们实际上
We actually
说实话，我们受够了。
have Quite frankly, we have we've had it.
皮威。
Pee wee.
我们明白了。
We understand.
皮威。
Pee wee.
你
You
想再谈一谈吗？
wanna talk about it again?
这其中有区别，而且实际上解释了我对善恶本质的感受。
There's a a diff and it explains actually how I feel about the the nature of good and evil.
好的。
Okay.
好的。
Okay.
因为实际上，你之前说文化对你而言意味着什么，那究竟是什么样的文化让莎拉你这么说的？
Because actually your So what was the culture that made you say culture was for you, Sarah?
告诉我们吧。
Tell us.
展开剩余字幕（还有 480 条）
告诉我们吧。
Tell us.
这是个搞笑的集数。
This is the laughing episode.
真的。
Literally.
嗯，这其实可以解释。
Well, it can be explained.
让我们稍作停顿，因为我们马上就要错过全球冥想活动了，我们录制这期播客是为了纪念大卫·林奇。
Let let's just take a moment because we're about to miss the worldwide meditation because we're recording this podcast in honor of David Lynch's memory.
我正想说，你
I was gonna say, you're
是谈论大卫·林奇的最合适人选
the perfect person to
这周请来你来谈论大卫·林奇再合适不过了。
have on this week to talk about David Lynch.
是的。
Yeah.
有太多原因了。
For so many reasons.
因为。
For
因为这是那个笑的片段。
for because it's the laughing episode.
这是那个笑的片段。
It's the laughing episode.
这部作品即将获得大量奥斯卡提名。
The substance is about to rack up lots of Oscar nominated.
它即将获得提名，我想我当时正坐在马桶上，你知道的，就像我平时那样，就像我们所有人那样。
It's about to rack I think I was literally think I was sitting on the toilet as I, you know, as I do, as we all do
很多人。
many people.
你最好的思考和排便
Your best thinking and shitting
当然。
Of course.
你被揭穿了吗？
Get blown did you find out?
这正是我想说的。
That's what I was gonna say.
什么？
What?
你知道吗？坐在马桶上超过十分钟是不被允许的。
Did you know you're not supposed to sit on the toilet for longer than ten minutes?
你有过吗？
Have you ever?
你有没有觉得更不公平的事？
Have you something more unfair?
这真是个美丽的地方
It's really it's it's such a beautiful place
可以说是最好的住宿地点。
sort of the best place to stay.
是的。
Yeah.
我喜欢待在那里。
I love remaining there.
有时候坐在那里，我就想，我要一直待着。
Well, sit there sometimes, I'm like, I'm gonna remain.
待着。
Remain.
别离开。
Not exit.
待着。
Remain.
不。
No.
我会留下来。
I will remain.
我在想什么才是剩下的东西？
What am I thinking of what remains?
那是奥普拉的畅销书吗？
Is that an Oprah's bestseller?
什么才是奥普拉的畅销书？
What remains Oprah's bestseller?
那是奥普拉的畅销书吗？
Is that an Oprah's bestseller?
剩下的是什么？
What remains?
有人会用谷歌吗？
Do you does anyone have the capability of Google?
你在想表象之下的是什么。
You're thinking of what lies beneath.
表象之下的是什么？
What lies beneath?
什么？
What?
你在想希拉里·克林顿发生了什么，
You're thinking of what happened by Hillary Clinton,
那是关于选举的。
which was about the election.
但她的名字
But her name
是充满爱意的
is lots of love
我得去
I've got to
做。
do.
什么？
What?
残留？
Remains?
哦，太棒了。
Oh, awesome.
什么残留？
What remains?
我在梦中接触到的东西。
Thing I've accessed in dream.
你在想
You're thinking
关于
of So
有一部2022年的电影
there's a film from 2022
那就是剩下的部分。
that's what remains.
我做不到那样。
I couldn't do that.
你在想《大地》这部皮尔·S·巴克的小说。
You're thinking of The Good Earth by Pearl S.
巴克。
Buck.
是的。
Yeah.
那太烂了。
That's shit.
我觉得那就是我想说的，你知道的？
I think that's what I'm you know?
那么，是什么样的文化让你提到文化呢？
So what was the culture that made you say culture?
我真的觉得，我们必须花点时间回顾一下，最后提到的文化是大卫·林奇。
I do think I really I think we we do have to be taking a moment for last culture is to say David Lynch.
好的。
Okay.
当然。
Absolutely.
我想我确实对你这样做了。
Think I I did to you.
基本上一无所知。
Basically know nothing.
我对大卫·林奇一窍不通。
I am so illiterate with David Lynch.
实际上，我们已经连续几个月都说要深入探讨《双峰》了。
We've actually been saying now for several months that we're gonna get into Twin Peaks.
我们实际上
We actually
到现在还没有
haven't at this
这个阶段。
point.
你知道为什么你们应该吗？
You know why you guys should?
你们喜欢美丽的女性，也喜欢悬疑情节。
You love beautiful women, and you love intrigue.
喜欢。
Love.
是的。
Yeah.
这确实是真的。
That's actually true.
希望如此真实。
Hope so true.
我不想剧透什么，但总的来说，在《双峰》三季的大剧情中，你们如此认真地盯着我，因为
And I don't wanna spoil anything, but basically, in the larger in the three season arc of Twin Peaks, you guys are looking at me so seriously at
这个，你们实际上
this You're actually
你们是真正的专家。
a true expert.
我只是觉得，你们真的非常重视女性的声音。
I just think that it's like you guys really take women's, like, voices seriously.
你们简直就是直接说，
You literally go,
你们在作恶。
you guys are being evil.
你们在作恶。
You guys are being evil.
你们实际上真的很坏。
You guys are actually, like, really evil.
你觉得你会成为一个
Do you think you'd be a
优秀的交易员还是糟糕的交易员？
good trader or a bad trader?
你会是个出色的交易员。
You'd be an amazing trader.
我觉得我不会。
I think I would no.
因为记得每次在小品里，我都得表现得很严肃吗？
Because remember every time in a sketch, I have to act serious?
某种程度上，你就像卡罗琳。
Well, you're like Carolyn in a way.
你很难被看透。
Like, you're like, you're so hard to pin down.
谢谢你这么说。
Thank you for saying that.
她就像在发疯一样。
It's like she's acting crazy.
她是在展现天才的一面。
She's acting genius.
对。
Right.
你们俩在这方面其实是一样的，大家都说，哦，莎拉就是莎拉。
It's like you're both the same in that way everyone's like, oh, Sarah's being Sarah.
但事实上，她内心深处
But in fact, she is deep down
是个天才。
a genius.
做那个我试图装正经时的表情
Do the face that I do when I'm trying to act
认真的。
serious.
如果你告诉莎拉，她必须认真一点或者在 gadget 前面板着脸，这就是她能做到的最好的样子了。
This is this is if you tell Sarah she has to, like, be, like, serious or keep a straight face in his gadget, this is this is the best she can do.
我能告诉你一件事吗？
Can I just tell you?
我注意到了。
I noticed it.
你演冷面搭档的角色是我最喜欢的，是的。
You're doing a straight man role is my favorite Yeah.
我想，顺便说一下，我们正在舞台上表演喜剧秀。
I guess it's like, we are on stage doing a comedy show, by the way.
对。
Right.
我们本应
And we're supposed
要严肃。
to serious.
我知道。
I know.
但你啊，莎拉，她真是快乐的化身。
But you Sarah but Sarah is truly joy personifying.
然后就像
And then like
我正好在笑，然后他们就说，哦，你正在演法庭场景。
I happen to be laughing and then they're like, oh, you're in a court scene.
所以我就说
And so I'm like
你能摆个法庭表情吗？
Can you do your court face, please?
但莎拉这个周六穿着《诺斯费拉图》的假肢道具。
But Sarah was in the Nosferatu prosthetics this Saturday.
她简直太棒了。
She's slayed by the way.
而与此同时，她本该看起来吓人，但每个人都说，这是我见过的最可爱的人了
And then meanwhile, like, it's she's supposed to look terrifying, but everyone's like, that's the most adorable person I've
ever seen.
ever seen.
鲁比·麦卡利斯特第二天早上十点给我打了电话，说：你知道吗？你看起来像个超级模特。
Ruby McAllister did call me at 10AM the next morning and said, did you know that you actually looked like a supermodel?
这简直太疯狂了。
It was, like, insane.
你确实做到了。
You did.
你当时
You were
非常迷人。
so captivating.
你从未看起来这么美。
You've never looked more beautiful.
这么说。
To say that.
你知道吗？
Did you
你实际上看起来像超模？
know you actually looked a supermodel?
太棒了。
Super.
我当时就说，没有啊。
And I was like, no.
我知道。
I know.
我的手臂太瘦了。
My arms are just so skinny.
那简直太疯狂了。
It was, like, insane.
因为当你有驼背时，它会制造一种视觉错觉，让你的手臂看起来真的开始...
Because, like, when when you have a hunchback, it, like, kind of, like, does the optical illusion where it's, your arm actually starts
在这里。
here.
就是莉亚·米歇尔那种情况。
The the Lea Michele thing.
来吧，我们这么干。
Like, let's do this.
好。
Yeah.
好。
Yeah.
对。
Yeah.
她可以
She can
你扮演了怪物。
You were Monstro.
你当时是
You were
怪物，但那种瘦削、时尚、性感的类型。
Monstro, but, like, but, like, skinny, chic, hot.
对。
Right.
香烟从唇边垂下。
Cigarette dangling from the lips.
诺斯费拉。
Nosfercera.
诺斯费拉。
Nosfercera.
诺斯费拉。
Nosfercera.
诺斯费拉。
Nosfercera.
妮可尔·苏。
Nicole Sue.
那个的标题。
A title of that.
怪物莎拉·妮可尔的标题。
Title of Monstros Sarah Nicole.
当你说到那个标题时，这次我知道你是专业人士，因为这话听起来非常流畅，毫无障碍。
When you say title of that, it, like this time I know you're a professional, the way it rolls off the tongue, like, without barrier.
这就是你知道他是
That's how you know he's
专业人士的原因。
a professional.
这就是你知道我是专业人士的原因。
That's how you know I'm professional.
它顺口溜出来的时候，我就知道我们拿到标题了。
The way it rolls off my tongue, I know when we get the title.
Monstrosera Nicole 就是这个标题。
And Monstrosera Nicole is the title.
当我笑到失控时，第一件事就是还没笑出声，就开始出汗。
The first thing that happens when I'm having a laughing attack is sweating before laughing coming out of my mouth.
这太棒了。
That's amazing.
所以你可能会看到我脸上闪着光，以为是水润的光泽，但实际上我因为笑得太厉害而大汗淋漓。
So I'm like, you can probably see it glistening and think it's like a dewy sheen, but I'm profusely sweating because I'm laughing so hard.
等等。
Wait.
关于出汗。
On sweating.
再谈一下交易员的事，桑瓦尔现在怎么了？
Just just to to talk about the traders one more time, what is going on with Sanderval?
哦，我觉得他像是吸了毒一样。
Oh, I think he's on, like, crack.
他是不是在戒断反应？
Is he having some sort of withdrawal?
这是
It's
一些，哦，
some oh,
这是戒断反应。
it's withdrawal.
就是这样。
That is what it is.
他明显是在玩范德普姆的套路。
He's obviously Vanderpump being rules.
对。
Right.
他从不这样表现。
He never acts like that.
他去了一座苏格兰宫殿，那里没有手机，或者他
He goes to a Scottish palace where they have no phones or He
需要国际旅行吗？
has to travel internationally?
是的。
Yeah.
然后突然间
And then suddenly
他不能把毒品
He can't bring the drugs
大量带入。
in lots.
他坐不住。
He couldn't sit still.
而且他出的汗比平时多得多
And he's sweating so much more
太多了。
than Totally.
是的。
Yes.
我能告诉你们一件事吗？其实我四分钟前一直不敢承认。
Can I tell you guys actually something that I was too afraid to admit, like, four minutes ago?
你在这里不用害怕。
You don't have to be afraid in here.
我一听到他们剧透。
I I as soon as they spoiler alert.
他们一不看了。
As soon as they stop watching.
他们一投票把林达淘汰，我就真的——当时我和我男朋友一起看。
As soon as they voted off to Rinda, I literally this was I was watching with my boyfriend.
我当场就这样了。
I went like this.
这是什么东西？
What's this thing?
是的。
Yeah.
我根本没法集中注意力。
I can't keep I can't hold my attention.
其实特别糟糕，因为他们很快就淘汰了一些很棒的人。
Was actually really rough because they they voted out some good people really quickly.
搞砸了。
Fucked up.
这真把我搞疯了。
That is fucking me.
那些被淘汰的人，真是有点可惜。
People that have gone, it's it's kind of a shame.
是的。
Yeah.
等等。
Wait.
谁？
Who?
因为然后
Because then
托尼和
Tony and
还有杰里米。
And Jeremy.
杰里米。
Jeremy.
是的。
Yeah.
托尼？
Tony?
对不起。
I'm sorry.
这太疯狂了。
That's crazy.
你还没跟上吗？
Are you not caught up?
没有。
No.
我没开玩笑。
I I'm not kidding.
每次我和我男朋友在一起，我都直截了当，
Every time my boyfriend and I'm straight,
对了。
by the way.
没关系。
That's okay.
别让衬衫出卖了你。
Don't let the shirt betray you.
我正和我的直女朋友站在一起。
I'm standing with my straight girl.
我们本该去的。
We should've gone.
今天选择了时尚。
Chose fashion today.
我之前怎么说你的衬衫的？
What did I say about your shirt?
告诉他们。
Tell them.
这看起来像海绵宝宝？
It's giving SpongeBob?
因为你看。
Because look.
哦，原来你指的是这个。
Oh, that's what you meant.
是的。
Yeah.
不。
No.
我当时在想，哪儿
Was like, where
她指的是？
she meant?
我当时在想，这是哪个海绵宝宝？
I was like, what SpongeBob is this?
这个海绵是像
Is this sponge like
我以为她是个在底部的角色。
I thought she was, like, a character on the bottom.
我当时想，
I'm like,
哦，你以为我是在说你像人质一样？
oh, you thought I was calling you, like, ransom
就因为她是个婊子。
for her be just being a bitch.
我回头查了下我之前怎么说你们对女性的看法的。
I checked back what I said about how you guys feel about women.
哦，是的。
Oh, yeah.
因为我知道
Because I know
这真的太棒了。
it's really such a go.
我是个厌女者。
I'm a misogynist.
伙计们。
Guys.
我不觉得有那么多同性恋男性？
I don't Think so many gay guys?
那我们呢？
What about us?
那同性恋男性呢？
What about gay guys?
继续说。
Go on.
时间到了。
Time.
权利正在被剥夺。
Rights being taken away.
你知道，不只是凯蒂的粉丝在听。
You know, it's not just Katie's that listen.
有些同性恋男性仍然在听。
Some gay guys do listen still.
热门的也是。
Hot ones too.
是的。
Yeah.
凯尔的。
Kyle's.
这太凯尔了。
That's so Kyle.
但有一个子群体，我们实际上说过要正式吸纳他们。
But there's a subgroup that we actually we said that we would officially induct them.
不。
No.
我们不能有五个吗？
We can't have five?
你什么意思？
What do mean?
他们说我们不能有两个。
They said we couldn't have two.
他们说我们不能有三个。
They said we couldn't have three.
他们说我们不能有Kyle的？
They said we couldn't Kyle's?
欢迎。
Have Welcome.
Kiles。
Kiles.
我喜欢Kiles。
Love the Kiles.
我简直迷死你们了。
I'm obsessed with you guys.
太疯狂了。
It's crazy.
我每天都会想到Sarah，然后微笑。
It's I'm I think about Sarah every day and I smile.
我没什么可说的，我只想坐着。
I have nothing to contribute to the conversation because I just wanna sit
坐在这里微笑。
here and smile.
闭嘴。
Shut up.
我就想走，各位。
I just wanna go, guys.
我可以
Can I
告诉你谁会对此非常生气吗？
tell you who'd be so furious about that?
所有的凯尔们。
All the Kyles.
他们很想听到你的声音，所以是的。
They wanna hear from you so Yeah.
他们是你
They're you're
哦，是的。
Oh, yeah.
你知道你自己是个同性恋偶像吗？
You know that you're a gay icon?
你是认真的吗？
Are you I'm not kidding.
我是认真的，我不会轻视这件事。
Like, I don't take that lightly.
我确实不应该这样。
And I really shouldn't.
如果你真这么做了，那就太糟糕了。
If you did, that would be fucked up.
我知道。
I know.
尤其是在我们现在的这个时代。
Especially now in the time that we're in.
他刚宣誓就职，就在现在，他正在宣誓就职。
He's sworn in, like, right he's getting sworn in, like, right
哦，天哪。
Oh, no.
我全程都看了。
I watched the whole thing.
他是怎么主持的？
How is was he serving?
我能跟你说件事吗？
Can I tell you something?
这是我的三个要点。
Here's my here's my three takeaways.
那简直像葬礼一样糟糕。
It was hell and like a funeral.
第二，我要说一件好事，我喜欢梅拉尼娅的帽子。
Two, one nice thing I'll say, I did like Melania's hat.
第三，凯莉·安德伍德唱得很难听。
Three, Carrie Underwood sounded bad.
哦。
Oh.
所有这些都发生了，而她的声音却显得吃力又尖锐。
And for all of that to go down and for her to sound strained and shouty.
真的吗？
Really?
是的。
Yeah.
那并不好。
It was not good.
你是卡莉的粉丝吗？
And are you a Carrie girl?
或者
Or
我不能说我是，你其实从来都不是。
I can't say I I was You never really were.
卡莉粉丝。
Carrie girl.
我在这档节目里从来没真正给过她应有的认可。
I've never really given her the proppers on this show.
你想知道那是什么吗？
I you wanna know what it is?
我一直对那种氛围感觉不太好。
I've always not had the best feeling on the vibes.
是的。
Yeah.
是的。
Yeah.
那种氛围一直很奇怪。
The vibes have always been weird.
但这会让你对博·莱斯产生购买后悔吗？
But does this make you go buyer's remorse on Bo Bice?
我们作为一个文化，
Do do we, as a culture,
想要
want to
把博·莱斯带回来？
bring Bo Bice back?
嗯，从一开始我就是冯·维尔·所罗门的粉丝。
Well, I was a Von Vell Solomon girly from the beginning.
我其实非常喜欢冯·维尔。
And I actually love Von Vell.
我也喜欢冯·维尔，冯·维尔是《游戏秀》的主唱。
And I love Von Vell, and Von Vell was the singer for Game Show on
Quibi。
Quibi.
就这样。
Period.
等等。
Wait.
那个长头发的是谁？
Who was long hair?
波伊斯。
Bovice.
我在波伊斯参赛时来了初潮。
I got my first period while Bovice
那时正是那种文化，
was And that's the culture that
让你说：‘我初潮了，我在流血。’
made you say, Menarche, I'm bleeding.
我装作什么事都没发生，因为
And I acted like it wasn't happening because
你还记得他唱的是哪首歌吗？
I was Do you remember what song he was singing?
因为他
Because he
他有
He had
他总是穿着棕色的，你妈妈应该让汉娜去，因为妈妈张开双臂拥抱汉娜，然后我就过去了。
a always brown the very should have your Mama, let me go into Hannah because mama arms out to Hannah, and I'll get around.
是那个吗？
Was it that?
那种感觉就像一股爬行动物般的寒意，直窜我的脊椎底部。
Because the way that just sent, like, a reptilian, like, chill to the base of my spine.
他穿着一件棕色的麂皮夹克，手里拿着一把吉他。
He had a brown suede jacket on and was holding a guitar.
就在那一刻发生的时候，他总是在场。
He was always moment it happened.
发型一丝不苟，像用熨斗烫过一样，直得惊人。
Tone on tone, perfectly, like, flat ironed hair, like, really straight
东西。
stuff.
刀片。
Blade.
当你们提到博比时，我想到的是那个灰头发的家伙。
When you guys said bobeys, I thought the guy with the gray hair.
很帅。
Hot.
泰勒·希克斯。
Taylor Hicks.
泰勒·希
Taylor He
对你来说很吸引人。
was hot to you.
莎拉，那是莎拉，
Sarah, that's Sarah,
你需要描述一下你理想中的帅哥。
you need to describe your perfect looking man.
是的。
Yeah.
描述一下你理想中的男人。
Describe your perfect man.
你知道我认为是什么吗？
Do you know what I think it is?
我想先说明一下，我今天说了太多前提和装模作样了。
I wanna preface this by saying, I think because I've been a lot prefacing and pretensing today.
我觉得是因为我的男朋友
I think because my boyfriend
奇怪。
Strange.
奇怪。
Strange.
放下你们的武器。
Put your weapons down.
把你们的武器推下去。
Push your weapons down.
我来撒尿，
I come and pees,
同性恋男生。
gay guys.
他们叫Kiles。
They're called Kiles.
我来安抚Kiles和Kadies，还有Moriahs和Shaniahs。
I come appease Kiles and Kadies alike, and Moriahs and Shaniahs.
他们没在听。
They're not listening.
嗯，Moriah忘了她做过这事。
Well Moriah forgot she did this.
那感觉就像你们快死的时候，躺在病床上那样。
That was, like, deathbed vibes when y'all are on your deathbed like this
完美
is perfect
天使风格。
angel style.
你可以这么说，我们做过这事。
You can go like, we did that.
是的。
Yeah.
你知道吗？
You know what?
完毕。
Period.
好吧，我们要说我们吃掉了那个。
Well, we're gonna say we ate that.
然后呢？
And what?
当我们79岁的时候。
When we're 79.
我们还是会继续扭臀、展现魅力、大放异彩。
We're still gonna be like, twerk and serve and slay.
我们吃掉了那份荣耀。
We ate that
彻底征服了。
down.
我们撕碎了它。
We tore.
你们俩的临终时刻将会是一百一十岁。
Deathbed for you two is gonna be one one hundred and
一百一十五岁。
fifteen years old.
我真的能想象到。
I can actually see it.
我能看见。
I can see it.
我不想活那么久。
I don't wanna live that long.
看起来会一样。
Gonna look the same.
我会看起来像诺斯费拉图，而不是时尚的英雄女主角。
I'm gonna look like Nosferat and not the chic hero heroine chic.
亲爱的，我老了。
Honey, I'm so old.
我是诺斯费拉图三号。
I'm Nosferat three.
哦，天哪。
Oh, bitch.
该死。
Damn.
你把自己拖到那儿去了，老太婆。
You dragged yourself there, old bitch.
老婊子。
Old bitch.
我太
I'm so
抱歉。
sorry.
好吧。
Okay.
等等。
Wait.
所以我们之前在谈一件事。
So we were on a thing.
完美的男人。
The perfect man.
完美的男人。
The perfect man.
哦，是的。
Oh, yeah.
完美的男人。
Perfect man.
哦，我觉得是因为我的
Oh, I think because my
泰勒·希克斯。
Taylor Hicks.
因为我觉得我那美丽又忍耐的男朋友太
Because I think my beautiful long suffering boyfriend is so
他太可爱了。
He's so cute.
他就是那种标准的帅气迷人。
He's so, like, standard cute attractive.
太可爱了。
So lovely.
而且，你知道吗，他发明了一个新词。
And, you know, he invented a new term.
什么？
What?
它叫cutiful。
It's cutiful.
就是当某物既可爱又美丽的时候。
It's when something's cute and beautiful.
这难道不美吗？
Isn't that Beautiful?
这难道不可爱吗？
Isn't that lovely?
真美。
Beautiful.
这真是太好了。
That's really good.
这不是很疯狂吗
Isn't that cray
他们不是来自？
Aren't from?
我们想听听关于他的事。
We wanna hear about him.
他最初是哪里人？
Where's he from originally?
他来自哪里？
Where's he from?
来自芝加哥南部。
South Over Chicago.
哦，我明白了。
Oh, I got I
哦，好的。
got Oh, Alright.
而且，他来自一个叫弗洛斯莫尔的小镇，所以你们自然就会听到一些梗，比如：我希望你好好刷牙，哦，
And, like, he's from a town called Flossmoor, so you, of course, you get build in jokes like, I wish you'd floss Oh,
嗯？什么？
well, what?
我
I
我不想
don't wanna
那样做。
do that.
流血？
Bleeding?
我
I
我不刷牙。
don't floss.
你不刷。
You don't.
你在撒谎。
You're a liar.
我不刷。
I don't.
你有着娱乐圈里最漂亮的牙齿。
You have the nicest teeth in show business.
是的。
Yeah.
但这恰恰证明了，他们告诉你的并不真实。
Though it just goes to show, what they're telling you is not true.
你不必这么做。
You don't have to do it.
哦，但你以前戴过牙套吗？
Oh, but did you ever have braces?
不。
No.
你在撒谎。
You're lying.
有些人觉得我的牙齿不整齐，但那是因为我讲话时只用嘴巴的一侧。
And some people think I have crooked teeth, but it's because I talk out of one side of my mouth.
什么？
What?
带着一丝微笑。
With a smirk.
就像蕾切尔·马多那样。
Like Rachel Maddow.
这是我做研究时才发现的一件事，
Something I found out when I had to do my research,
当然。
of course.
顺便说一下，你吃了那个。
You ate that, by the way.
没有。
No.
顺便说一下，你
By the way, you
知道为什么吗？
know why?
就在我的脚趾离开舞台的那一刻，每个人都很惊讶地说：嘿。
At the second my toe came off stage, every single person was like, hey.
你把所有的话都说错了。
You messed up all your words.
滚开。
Fuck off.
谁说的？
Who said that?
所有人。
Everyone.
是直播电视。
Was live television.
试着快速说十遍MSNBC。
Try saying MSNBC 10 times fast.
MSNBC。
MSNBC.
MSNBC。
MSNBC.
MSNBC。
MSNBC.
好吧。
Well, okay.
总得说一次，结果我说成了MFNB a b c。
Had to say it one time, and I said MFNB a b c.
你是在努力不说出来。
I You're trying not to say it.
如果你真的用心，是能做到的。
You could do it if you really applied yourself.
你演女同性恋时绷得那么紧。
You were you were straining so hard playing a lesbian
我知道。
I know.
因为你是个怪人。
Because you're such a straggot.
我觉得就是这样。
I think that's what happened.
然后我的大脑就开始乱了。
And then my brain just started, like, fritzing out.
你是个怪人。
You are a straggot.
你确实是。
You really are.
真的，谢谢你。
Literally, thank you.
发自内心地感谢你。
From the bottom of my heart.
我能问你个问题吗？
Can I ask you something?
之前，当我们说你是同性恋偶像，而且你根本不在意时，你变得情绪化。
Before, you got emotional when we said that you were a gay icon and that you really don't take it like it.
我只是
I just
谈谈这个。
Talk about that.
因为，我的意思是，我不想这样。
Because, I mean, not to be like this.
求你了。
Please.
除了大卫·林奇之外，你认为还有谁塑造了我们今天所知的文化？
Who do you think besides David Lynch built culture as we know it?
同性恋者。
Gay guys.
真的是同性恋者。
Literally gay guys.
奥普拉。
Oprah.
感觉你从她那里夺走了这一切。
Feels like you took that away from her.
从黑人女性身上。
From black women.
你剥夺了黑人女性的这份荣耀，这太糟糕了。
That sucks that sucks for you to rob the black women of that.
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