如何成为更好的送礼者

嘿，我是玛丽埃尔。

Hey, it's Mariel.

在今天节目开始之前，我想谈谈公共媒体。

Before we start the show today, I wanna talk about public media.

公共媒体是为你而制作的。

Public media is made for you.

它通过节目丰富你的认知和生活。

It serves you with programs meant to enrich your understanding and your life.

自在美国创立以来，公共媒体还旨在讲述那些被忽视群体的故事，并提供拓展你视野的文化洞察。

From its founding in The US, public media was also meant to tell stories from underrepresented communities and to provide cultural insight that expands your perspective.

我们 NPR 依然坚信公共媒体的这些核心承诺。

We still believe in these core commitments of public media at NPR.

但从今年秋季起，包括 NPR 和地方 NPR 频道在内的公共媒体联邦拨款已被取消。

But as of this fall, federal funding for public media, including NPR and local NPR stations, has been eliminated.

展望未来，我们需要依靠您的支持，以便继续为您带来《生活工具箱》等节目的内容。

As we move forward, we're counting on your support so we can keep bringing you episodes of shows like Life Kit.

让我们一起完成吧。

Let's do this together.

如果你是NPR Plus的支持者，谢谢您。

If you're an NPR Plus supporter, thank you.

我们非常感激。

We are so grateful.

如果不是，欢迎加入Plus社区，享受额外剧集等众多福利，并通过今天在+.npr.org注册NPR Plus来支持公共媒体。

And if not, you can join the Plus community, get a bunch of perks like bonus episodes and more from across NPR's podcasts, and support public media by signing up for NPR Plus today at +.npr.org.

您正在收听NPR的《Life Kit》。

You're listening to Life Kit from NPR.

大家好。

Hey, everybody.

我是Marielle。

It's Marielle.

你有没有给某人送过完美的礼物？

Have you ever gotten somebody the perfect gift?

蕾切尔·威尔克森·米勒绝对有过这样的经历。

Rachel Wilkerson Miller definitely has.

如果你

If you

住在纽约，只要去过餐厅，每家餐厅墙上都必须贴一张关于海姆立克急救法的海报，说明如何在别人窒息时施救。

live in New York, you and you've been to restaurants, every restaurant has to have a choking poster on their wall that explains, like, how to do the Heimlich on somebody if they're choking.

很多餐厅还会定制一些幽默或具有自身特色的海报。

And a lot of restaurants will commission ones that are tongue in cheek or specific to them.

这还是我和我女友刚约会时聊过的话题。

And it's something that my girlfriend and I had talked about when we had first started dating.

她会带我留意我们去过的不同地方的这类海报，并且特别指出了一张她非常喜欢的。

Like, she would point them out in different places we'd go, and she pointed out a specific one that she really liked.

那张海报是蓝白配色，带有度假主题。

It was blue and white and had a kind of vacation theme.

画面上人们正在热带岛屿的棕榈树下用餐，而一位穿着正式服装的男士正接受海姆立克急救，一个完整的汉堡从他嘴里飞了出来。

Like, people are having dinner on a tropical island underneath these palm trees while this dude in formal attire is getting the Heimlich and a full hamburger comes flying out of his mouth.

所以拉切尔在网上找到了这张海报，买下来，在几年后他们一起搬进新家时送给了她的女友作为乔迁礼物。

So Rachel found the poster online, bought it, and gave it to her girlfriend as a housewarming gift when they moved in together years later.

就在几个月前，她突然说：我太喜欢这个了。

And just, like, a few like, couple months ago, she was just like, I love that so much.

这是我收到过的最好的礼物。

That was the best gift I have ever received.

它太特别了。

It's so special.

每次看到它，我都感到非常开心。

It makes me so happy every time I look at it.

这种事你很难经常做到。

And, like, you can't pull that off very often.

这是一次非常精准的投其所好，我运气不错找到了它，然后，你知道的，又搁置了两年，直到最合适的时机才送出。

Like, that was a deep cut that I got lucky in terms of finding and then, you know, again, sat on it for two years until the perfect moment.

但对我来说，我真的很为这个礼物感到自豪。

But, like, to me, that was I feel very proud of that one.

顺便说一下，瑞秋不仅是个出色的送礼者。

Rachel by the way isn't just a great gift giver.

她还是《如何为人处世：为自己和他人提供支持》一书的作者，曾任《SELF》杂志主编。

She's also the author of the book The Art of Showing Up How to Be There for Yourself and Your People and the former editor in chief of SELF magazine.

她说，礼物可以帮助我们向他人表达关心和了解。

And she says gifts can help us show people that we care about them and that we know them.

因为这是一种沟通方式，不仅传达‘我在意你’，更传达‘我看见你’。

Because it's a way of communicating not just I care about you but I see you.

我看见真实的你，看见你的兴趣所在，并找到了一件你真正热爱的东西。

I see you for who you are and the things that you're interested in and I found something that you personally are really into.

当你送出一份真正用心、真挚的礼物时，我发誓，送礼者的喜悦甚至超过收礼者——因为你经历了从产生想法、挑选或制作礼物、包装、带到对方家，直到对方打开礼物、看到他们脸上表情的整个期待过程。

And when you nail it and get someone a really thoughtful, heartfelt gift, I swear it's better than being the recipient because you get the anticipation when you have the idea and when you make the thing or buy it, when you're wrapping it, when you're bringing it to their house, and then finally when they open it and you see that look on their face.

我们希望这种体验也能属于你。

We want that for you.

所以，在今天这一期《生活工具箱》中，我们来聊聊如何为节日挑选更好的礼物。

So on today's episode of Life Kit, how to give better gifts for the holidays.

顺便说一下，这些礼物不一定要昂贵，也不一定非得买。

And by the way, these gifts don't have to be expensive and you don't have to buy them.

这并不是关于花钱。

It's not about spending money.

这是关于表达爱意。

It's about showing love.

我觉得对很多人来说，送礼感觉非常令人望而生畏。

I feel like for a lot of people, gift giving feels really daunting.

对吧？

Right?

比如，有人要过生日了，你想要——或者觉得必须送他们一份礼物，但嗯。

It's like you've got somebody with a birthday coming up and you want to or you feel like you have to get them a gift, but Mhmm.

你却完全不知道从哪里开始。

You have no idea where to start.

完全同意。

Completely agree.

我觉得人们会感到不知所措，因为他们想做些特别出色或特别有意义的事情。

I think people get really overwhelmed because they wanna do something really impressive or really special.

而且很多时候，人们总想重新发明轮子。

And I think a lot of times people are trying to reinvent the wheel.

他们想给点出人意料的礼物，于是避免送对方明确要求的东西，但我认为这其实是个错误。

They wanna do something unexpected, so they avoid giving the person something that they explicitly asked for, which I actually think is a mistake.

如果有人告诉你他们想要什么，直接送他们想要的东西完全没问题。

If somebody is telling you what they want, it's totally fine to give them exactly what they want.

但即使他们没说，我觉得也有办法找出适合这个人的礼物。

But even if they didn't, I think there are ways to figure out what might be a good gift for this person.

是的。

Yeah.

我的意思是，你能给我们一个实用的指南吗？

I mean, do you have a road map we can give to folks?

给那些站在商店里，头顶上冒出大问号的人？

The ones who are just standing there in the store with a big, like, question mark popping up over their head?

与其去商店里寻找你看到的东西作为灵感，我认为应该从你离家前就开始思考：我对这个人了解多少？

Instead of going to a store and looking for inspiration in the things that you see, I think it starts with before you even leave the house thinking, what do I know about this person?

一般来说，我在这里想寻找的是什么？

Generally speaking, what am I looking for here?

他们提到过喜欢什么、对什么感到兴奋、经常使用的东西，或者他们提到想尝试的事情——回想一下你最近的对话。

What they've mentioned being into, being excited about, things that they mentioned using a lot, or things that they mentioned wanting to try, thinking back to your recent conversations.

这是一个提到非常期待和朋友一起举办游戏之夜的人。

This is a person who mentioned that they were really excited to have a game night with friends.

好吧。

Like, okay.

这说明他们喜欢游戏。

That tells you that they're into games.

这是一个很好的切入点，即使不直接买游戏，你也可以给他们买拼图、乐高套装或其他与此相关的东西。

That's a great jumping off point that maybe if not a game explicitly, maybe you get them a puzzle or a LEGO set or something else that feels related to that.

所以，如果有人说他们期待和朋友一起举办游戏之夜，这让我想到，他们不仅喜欢游戏，也可能喜欢与人聚会。

So if somebody says they're excited about a game night with friends, that makes me think, you know, they like games, but also they might like gathering with people.

就像现在，这正是他们所关注的。

Like, that's what is calling them right now.

完全正确。

Completely.

所以你可以送他们一本关于聚会的好书。

So maybe you give them a great book about gathering.

我强烈推荐普里娅·帕克的《聚会的艺术》，这是我最喜欢的书之一。

I highly recommend The Art of Gathering by Priya Parker, one of my favorites.

如果人们喜欢招待客人，这会是个很棒的礼物。

If people like hosting, it's a great gift.

但你也可以想想其他与朋友来家里玩牌夜相关的东西。

But you could also think about other things that go along with having friends over for a game night.

比如，可以送一个奶酪火腿拼盘，或者一些小吃，或者一本与制作小食相关的食谱，或者其他能丰富牌夜体验但又不一定是游戏的东西。

So maybe it is about, like, a charcuterie board or other snacks or a cookbook that's tied to making little appetizers or just other things that would, like, supplement a game night without necessarily being a game.

对。

Yeah.

或者，这份礼物甚至可以是你来组织这场游戏之夜？

Or could the gift even be that you set up the game night?

哦，当然可以。

Oh, absolutely.

比如，主动提出举办一场聚会。

Like, just offering to throw that as as a like get together.

可以说，我们想为你庆祝生日。

Say, like, we wanna celebrate your birthday.

你觉得来我家试试这些新游戏，或者只是聚一聚怎么样？

What do you think about coming over and trying out these new games or, you know, just spending time together?

我觉得这是个非常好的观点。

I think that's a really great point.

看看他们平时喜欢怎么消磨时间，专注于这些方面，为他们提供一种方式，或许能减轻他们的压力，让事情显得更特别，或者让他们不必自己操心规划。

Just look for the ways that they tend to feel like like, how do people spend their time and focusing on that and offering them a way to do that, maybe take some of the pressure off of them or makes it feel more special or just something they don't have to plan themselves.

这本身就可以是一份礼物。

That can be a gift in and of itself.

所以我想通过一个例子来说明一下，嗯。

So I wanna I wanna walk through an example Mhmm.

以我们的制片人克莱尔·玛丽为例。

Using our producer, Claire Marie.

好的。

Okay.

我有一些关于她的信息，我想知道你认为什么样的生日礼物适合她。

So I have some details about her, and I'm wondering what you might say would be a good birthday gift for her.

好的。

Okay.

这是我所知道的关于克莱尔·玛丽的一些信息。

Here are the things that I know about Claire Marie.

我知道她喜欢编织，嗯。

I know that she likes knitting Mhmm.

还有双陆棋。

And backgammon.

她也喜欢鞋子。

She also likes shoes.

她真的很想要一个黄油碟。

She really wants a butter dish.

哦，好的。

Oh, okay.

我还了解到她喜欢奢华的体验，比如她一直想做个面部护理。

I have also learned that she likes a luxurious experience like she's been wanting to get a facial.

哦，好的。

Oh, okay.

我觉得这些都很适合作为送礼的切入点。

These are great jumping off points, I think, for a gift.

那我们从 knitting 开始吧，因为我觉得这是我 actually 会做的事情。

So let's start with knitting because I think that that's something I actually do.

我对如何搭配一份出色的针织礼物有一些想法。

So I have thoughts on how to put together a great knitting gift.

也许你可以买一些小针套之类的配件，来充实她的编织包。

Maybe you get them, like, little knitting needle covers or other sort of, like, things to fill out their knitting bag.

如果你不会编织，这可能有点难，但我建议你花点时间在网上搜索编织礼物，看看有没有什么看起来可爱的东西。

This is one if you don't knit that might be difficult, but I think it's worth kind of just poking around searching knitting gifts online and see if anything comes up that feels cute.

在Etsy上寻找是个不错的机会。

Looking on Etsy feels like a good opportunity.

但我要说，任何特别个人化的东西，比如为你挑选毛线，最好避免，尤其是因为你不知道她的技能水平如何。

But I would say, like, anything that feels really personal, like choosing the yarn for your project, probably want to avoid, particularly because you don't know what her skill level is.

所以对于这种爱好，建议选择配件而不是毛线。

So think accessories versus yarn with with a hobby like that.

但你提到她想要一个黄油碟，我觉得这是找一些有趣东西的绝佳机会。

But the other thing that you said is that she wants a butter dish, and I think that's a really fun opportunity to find something that feels really fun.

但我建议去古董店、复古店，或者在Etsy上找一些更特别、更独特的物品。

But I would recommend going to, like, an antique store or a vintage store or looking on Etsy for something that's, like, a little bit more unusual or unique.

我特别喜欢的一种食物类礼物方式，就是把它和某种食物搭配起来。

And a thing that I really like to do with food related gifts is to pair it with a food of some sort.

所以在这种情况下，当你送给她时，根据具体情况，你还可以搭配一些非常好的黄油一起送给她。

So in this case, when you give it to her, depending on the circumstances, you could also give it to her with, like, some really nice butter.

比如，你可以去一家高档食品店，买他们最精致的黄油，甚至只是买一些凯瑞戈尔德黄油，但总之要让这份礼物更上一层楼。

Like, you could go to a nice high end food shop and get, like, you know, just like the fanciest butter that they've got or even just some Kerrygold, but something that that kind of takes it to the next level.

你不仅挑到了完美的黄油碟，还送了她一种全新的黄油来尝试。

So not only are you picking out the perfect butter dish, but you're giving her a new butter to try.

哦，我喜欢这个主意。

Oh, I love that.

你已经让我开始搜索了。

You have me already searching.

我正在谷歌搜索黄油碟。

I'm googling butter dishes.

是的。

Yeah.

你看，你还可以买一些精致的小黄油刀，它们可以和黄油碟搭配，或者说是奶酪刀，但我个人用它们来切黄油。

See, you could also do like, there's lots of fancy little butter knives that you can buy that kind of go with the like, or like they're like cheese knives, but I I use them for butter personally.

所以，像这样的东西也可以帮助丰富这份礼物，如果你想要再加点什么的话。

So, like, something like that could also help flesh out the gift if you wanted to add more to it.

并不是说你必须这么做，因为我觉得这已经足够了。

Not that you need to because I think this is enough.

但想想如何搭配一套小物件，而不是试图找一个完美的礼物，这也是一种不错的选择。

But just thinking about kind of, like, how to build a whole little kit of small things versus trying to find one perfect gift can also be a nice option.

完全正确。

Totally.

我在想，当你送礼物时，你和对方的关系应该如何影响你的选择。

I wonder how should your relationship with the person come into play when you're giving a gift.

比如，我是克莱尔·玛丽的同事。

Like, I'm Claire Marie's coworker.

嗯。

Mhmm.

但我们的关系感觉已经到了黄油碟这个级别了。

But we it feels like we're at the butter dish level.

我觉得你说得完全对。

I think you're totally right.

就像这个礼物感觉正好合适，因为它友好又温暖，但又不会显得太过私密或亲密。

Like, that feels like the exact correct gift because it's it's friendly and it's warm without feeling super personal or intimate.

而且这是她会用到的东西，你知道，她曾提到想要，但你对她的品味还不够了解，所以不会去挑一件昂贵的、只能选一件、必须完美的东西。

And it's like a thing that she'll use, you know, that she's mentioned wanting it, but you don't know her taste so well that you're trying to pick out a really expensive item where she can only have one and it needs to be perfect.

像黄油碟这样的东西，你就有更多余地了。

Like, you have a little more wiggle room with something like a butter dish.

所以我觉得，对于同事或者还不太熟悉的人，选择那些大致方向正确的礼物是很好的，即使不是完美无缺，对他们来说依然有价值。

And so I think with coworkers or people who you don't know super well yet, going for those gifts that you're like, you're generally getting in the right area and even if it's not perfect, there will still be value in it for them.

我觉得这是正确的做法。

I think that's the right move.

没错。

Yeah.

黄油是很中性的。

Butter is super neutral.

确实是。

It is.

每个人都能喜欢黄油。

Everyone can enjoy butter.

这真的一点都不私人化。

It's it's really not that personal.

我觉得有时候最好的礼物就像一些小宝藏。

I feel like sometimes the best gifts are like, they're little treasures.

完全同意。

Completely agree.

没错。

Yeah.

就像人们旅行时偶然买到的那些奇怪小物件，或者‘看到这个就想到你’之类的礼物。

Just like little weird things that people pick up on their travels or those I saw this and thought of you gifts.

我觉得只要看到某样东西让你想起某个人，就立刻买下来，这从来都不是个坏主意，你可以把它留到对方生日时送，或者如果东西不大，现在就送给他。

I think it's never a bad idea to just if you see something that reminds you of somebody, buy it then, and you can either save it for their birthday or just give it to them then if it's small.

就像在友谊和关系中，当你遇到一些东西时，能用心地送小礼物，这是一件很美好的事。

Like, it just it's an it's a nice thing to do in friendships and relationships to just be thoughtful and give little gifts as you come across them.

但我同意。

But I agree.

它们不需要复杂或精致。

They don't need to be elaborate or super complicated.

就是说，这里有个奇怪又有趣的东西，让我想到了你，我觉得你会喜欢。

It's just like, here's a weird funny thing that reminded me of you and I thought you'd like it.

你床底下是不是有个盒子或袋子，里面装着你攒着的所有礼物？

Do you have like a box or a bag under your bed with all the gifts you're saving up?

我没有。

I don't.

因为我觉得自己会记下想法，但通常要到时候才去买礼物。

Because I think I have idea I save ideas, but I don't usually buy the gift until it's time.

因为永远不知道会不会有更好的东西出现。

Just because you never know if something better is gonna come along.

但通常来说，遇到合适的东西时把那些想法记下来是个好主意。

But usually kind of like storing those ideas away as you come across things is a good idea.

你把想法存在哪里？

Where do you store the ideas?

通常我会用笔记应用。

Usually, like in a notes app.

给大家一个小贴士：如果你有iPhone，可以在联系人卡片里添加备注，这样当你想到要给这个人买什么礼物时，就可以记下来；或者你可以发邮件给自己，如果你的日历里已经设置了这个人的生日，也可以设置提醒。

One tip for everybody is if you have an iPhone in a contact card, you can put notes in the contact card so you can you can make a note of, like, gifts you'd like to buy this person as you think of them, or you can email them to yourself, put it in your calendar reminder if you have that person's birthday on your calendar.

最重要的是，无论用什么方式，只要能方便地找到就行。

Just wherever you can find it easily, I think is the most important thing.

这真的很聪明。

That's really smart.

我打算就这么做。

I'm gonna do that.

广告后我们继续带来更多生活指南。

We'll have more life kit after the break.

礼物能帮助你加深与某人的联系或关系吗？

Can a gift help you deepen your connection or your relationship with someone?

我觉得可以。

I think so.

特别是当你想到体验类礼物时，比如博物馆会员资格，这暗示着我们会一起去做这件事，这可能适用于家人或伴侣。

Particularly if you think about experience gifts like a, like a museum membership where the implication is like, we're gonna do this together, and that might be something with a family member or a significant other.

但我觉得，关键是这是我们可以一起做的事情，或者是我们共同拥有的东西。

But I think the idea of like, this is something that we can do together or that we have in common.

或者，如果你的父母特别喜欢某项运动，你可以为他们的生日买一张比赛门票，然后你陪他们一起去，把它变成一个特别的活动。

Or if you have a parent who's really into a particular sport, maybe you get them tickets to that game for their birthday with and you're gonna take them and you're gonna go together and you're gonna make an event of it.

我认为这可以成为加深关系的绝佳方式，因为你不仅给了他们一件特别的东西，还和他们一起享受它。

I think that can be a really nice way to deepen that bond because you're not only giving them this really special thing, but you're also enjoying it with them.

即使你个人并不喜欢，比如在你生日时，我愿意花时间参与你热爱的事情，我觉得这也能让人感到更亲近。

And even if it's something that you don't personally love, like the idea of, like, for your birthday, I'm gonna spend time engaging with the thing that you love, I think can make people feel closer.

你觉得直接问别人他们生日想要什么怎么样？

What do you think about just asking people what they want for their birthday or whatever?

我觉得这完全没问题。

I think that's totally fine.

再次强调，我认为我们不需要在没有对方任何意见的情况下，给自己施加太大压力去挑选完美的礼物。

Again, I don't think that we need to put so much pressure on ourselves to choose the perfect gift without any input from the other person.

所以，这又回到了你和那些非常亲近的人的关系上，比如家人或伴侣。

So again, it kinda goes back to your relationship with people you're really close to, like family members or partners.

我觉得完全可以直接问。

I think it's totally, like, absolutely ask.

我觉得对朋友来说可能会更复杂一些，因为你处于一种微妙的境地：我们到底要不要送礼物？

I think with friends, it can be trickier because you are in that weird position of like, are we doing gifts?

这在一定程度上取决于你们关系的亲疏，但我认为你可以优雅地表达，比如他们生日快到了，你可以问：‘今年你有什么愿望清单吗？’

It kind of depends on how close you are, but I think you can frame it elegantly of kind of like, you know, if they've got a birthday coming up, like, you know, what's on your wish list this year?

或者你可以说：‘我想送你一份特别的礼物。’

Or like, you can say like, I wanna get you something special.

我觉得给出一个类别会更好，比如：‘最近有没有哪本烹饪书是你特别想买的？’

I think giving them a category is like like, are there any cookbooks that you're really excited about that you've been wanting?

比如，给我列个简短的清单。

Like, give me a short list.

然后，你从他们提供的五个选项中选一个。

And then, like, the gift is you pick one of them, but they've given you five.

当他们给你提建议时，留一点余地，这样你还能保留一些送礼的惊喜感，我觉得很多人都期待这种感觉。

Giving them a little wiggle room when they give you ideas so that you get kind of, like, retain some of the magic of gifting, which I think a lot of people are hoping for.

是的。

Yeah.

有些人真的不想要更多的实物，或者他们没地方放。

There are some people who really don't want any more physical items or they don't have the space for it.

嗯。

Mhmm.

你可以考虑哪些类型的体验或服务作为礼物呢？

What are some kinds of experiences you could consider as gifts or acts of service even?

我认为，对于那些不想要更多物品或没有空间存放的人来说，消耗品是个不错的选择。所以，想想你们当地有没有哪家面包店做的派或面包特别好吃？

I think that consumables can be a really good option for people who don't want more stuff or don't have room for So again, thinking about, like, is there a bakery in your area that makes really great pies or breads?

比如，你可以送他们一个非常精致的礼品篮，里面的东西都会被吃光，最后剩下的只是一个纸板箱。

Like, could you get them a really nice gift basket that essentially you're gonna eat everything out of it and, like, you know, the basket is just a cardboard box at the end of the day?

像这样的东西会很不错。

Something like that could be really good.

我们之前谈到了博物馆会员卡，我觉得这是个不错的选择。

We talked about museum memberships, and I think that's a nice option.

或者，他们所在地区有没有什么他们常去的地方，你可以帮忙安排一下？

Or are there other things in their area that they like to do regularly that that you could sort of help facilitate?

汽车清洗礼品券是个很好的选择，适合所有有车的人。

Car wash gift certificates can be a really nice option that kind of work for everyone who has a car.

所以，这可以是一种提供服务和消耗品的方式，而他们可能根本没想到这些。

So that that could be a way you could do acts of service and something consumable that they might not be necessarily thinking about.

但把这几种方式结合起来，会是个不错的选择。

But kind of combining these things together can be a nice way to do it.

我觉得很多人觉得自己没有足够的预算给他人买一份像样的礼物。

I think a lot of people feel like they don't have the budget to get someone a good gift.

嗯。

Mhmm.

但根据我们刚才的讨论，礼物并不一定非得昂贵才能有意义。

But also, just based on what we're talking about, it seems like gifts don't have to be expensive to be meaningful.

同意。

Agree.

比如，我们刚才列出的很多东西都完全负担得起，甚至可能只需要你花点时间。

Like, there's a lot we've just listed that are totally affordable or even might just require your time.

嗯。

Mhmm.

当然。

Definitely.

我觉得，花束大概20到25美元就能买到。

I think that, flowers, you can probably get for $20.25 dollars.

这会非常棒。

That can be really nice.

一本你觉得他们会喜欢的书总是个稳妥的选择，特别是如果你能在书店找到作者亲笔签名的版本。

A book that you think they'll like is always a safe bet, particularly if you can find a copy signed by the author at the bookstore.

我觉得这是让礼物更上一层楼的绝佳方式。

I think that's a really nice way to take it to the next level.

你能亲手做点什么吗？

Can you make something?

你能做一炉你特别喜欢的饼干，然后包装得漂漂亮亮送给他们吗？

Can you make a really delicious batch of cookies that you like wrap up nicely for them?

所以我觉得，关键是要想想我能 personally 提供些什么？

So I think just thinking about what can I personally provide?

一件小小的艺术品。

A little piece of art.

比如，如果你会画画或绘画，能为他们画点什么吗？

Like, if you can draw or paint, can you make them a little something?

其实根本不需要搞得那么复杂。

Just it doesn't have to be a big ordeal.

它可以很小巧且富有个人意义。

It can be small and personal.

这是一种表达方式，就像在说：我在乎你。

And it's just a way of, like, saying, I care about you.

我希望你在这一天收到一些美好而特别的东西。

I wanted you to have something nice and special on this day.

是的。

Yeah.

在最好的情况下，礼物能为我们带来什么？

At their very best, what can gifts do for us?

我认为，在最好的情况下，礼物能给我们一个机会去做一些原本可能无法做到的事。

I think at their very best, gifts can give us an opportunity to do something that we might not have been able to do otherwise.

它们真正可以带来一种发现的体验。

They could really be about discovery.

所以我觉得，那些特别的礼物是那种你找到了一件完美适合我的东西，而我甚至都不知道它存在。

So I think that the the gifts that are so special are the ones that are like, you found the perfect thing for me that I didn't even know existed.

这真的很难做到。

That's really hard to pull off.

所以我们可以说，这是理想中的完美典范。

So we'll say that's like the platonic ideal.

但我觉得除此之外，礼物还能解决问题。

But I think beyond that, gifts can they can solve a problem.

它们可以在某种程度上让某人的生活变得轻松一点。

They can make somebody's life a little easier in some way.

它们能给他们带来一点快乐、喜悦或愉悦。

They can bring them a little joy or delight or pleasure.

它们能让他们感觉不那么孤单。

They can make them feel less alone.

它们能让他们感觉被看见。

They can make them feel seen.

它们可以实现上述任何一种甚至多种功能，我认为不妨想一想：我希望我的礼物起到什么作用？

They can do any number of these things, and I think it can be helpful to just think about what do I want my gift to do?

我是希望它让人笑，还是希望它让人深受触动、甚至流泪？

Do I want it to make somebody laugh, or do I want it to make them feel, like, really moved and cry?

因为这两种情况几乎肯定是完全不同的礼物。

Because those are two totally different gifts most likely.

想想你送这份礼物想达成什么目的，就从这里开始，而不是试图找到一份对每个人都很完美的完美礼物。

Just think about what you're trying to achieve with the gift and, like, start there versus trying to come up with the perfect gift that would be perfect for anyone and everyone.

克莱尔·玛丽，你觉得我该给你买个黄油碟吗？还是现在把惊喜毁了？

Claire Marie, are you feeling like I should get you a butter dish, or does has it now ruined the surprise?

不。

No.

百分之百。

A 100%.

我想要一套黄油碟。

I want I want a collection of butter dishes.

你知道的？

You know?

太棒了。

Amazing.

好的。

Okay.

我们做到了。

We did it.

你们做到了。

You guys did it.

哇。

Wow.

很好。

Good.

好的。

Okay.

很高兴认识你，蕾切尔。

Really nice to to meet you, Rachel.

你也是。

You too.

好的。

Alright.

这就是我们的节目。

That's our show.

在我们结束之前，你有没有一个会向其寻求建议的朋友？

Before we go, do you have a friend that you call for advice?

你觉得他们会喜欢《生活工具箱》吗？

Do you think they would like life kit?

为什么不跟他们分享一期节目呢？

Why not share an episode with them?

广而告之。

Spread the word.

本集《生活工具箱》由克莱尔·玛丽·施耐德制作。

This episode of life kit was produced by Claire Marie Schneider.

我们的视觉编辑是贝丝·卡尔林，数字编辑是马利卡·吉里布。

Our visuals editor is Beth Carlin, and our digital editor is Malika Girib.

梅根·凯恩是我们的主管编辑，贝丝·多诺万是我们的执行制片人。

Megan Cain is our supervising editor, and Beth Donovan is our executive producer.

我们的制作团队还包括安迪·泰格尔、玛格丽特·索里诺和西尔维·道格拉斯。

Our production team also includes Andy Tegel, Margaret Sorino, and Sylvie Douglas.

工程支持由斯泰西·阿博特提供。

Engineering support comes from Stacy Abbott.

我是玛丽埃尔·塞韦拉。

I'm Mariel Seguera.

感谢收听。

Thanks for listening.