我试过一切方法来摆脱心碎，只有这个有效。

这实在有点过头了。

This is too much.

所以看电影这条路行不通了。

So movies weren't working.

明白了。

Sure.

我妹妹特别喜欢拼图，她住在亚特兰大，经常去玩密室逃脱。

And my sister is a big puzzle fan, and she loved doing escape rooms in Atlanta, which is where she lives.

她带我去了一次密室逃脱。

And she brought me to an escape room.

她是怎么提起这事儿的？

How did she even bring this up?

这听起来可不像是平常约出来玩的常规选择啊。

This does not feel like on the bevy of normal, like, hangout options.

对吧？

Right?

她是怎么跟你提起这个的？

Like, how did she even bring this up to you?

我觉得那些来探望我的人，可能私下商量好了，得每天逼我出门一趟，给我找点事做，因为我啥都不决定，也不提任何建议。

Well, I think the people who are coming in to visit me were tasked to they might be huddling behind my back, tasked with getting me out of the house at least once a day and with coming up with something to do because I was making no decisions or offering.

我拒绝了所有提议。

I said no to everything.

于是她就跟我说：‘姐，咱们去玩个密室逃脱吧。’

And so she was like, hey, sis.

咱们去玩个密室逃脱吧。

We're gonna go to an escape room.

你第一反应是什么？

Was your immediate reaction?

我一开始还以为密室逃脱是公司团建用的。

Really thought that they were for corporate team building.

对。

Yes.

对我来说，这就像扔斧头。

To me, it's like axe throwing.

这种活动好像只存在于科技公司的团队建设活动中。

It's like that only exists for like the corporate retreat of the tech company.

对吧？

Right?

没错。

Exactly.

真的吗？

Really?

我们要参加那种三甲公司员工用来增进感情的活动？

We're gonna do this some like, the thing three m employees do to bond?

我不想参加这个。

I don't wanna do that.

但我也没别的主意，而且奇怪的是，我居然愿意让别人替我做决定。

But I also didn't have any other ideas, and I weirdly was open to people just taking control of my body and mind.

她有跟你提过是什么类型的密室逃脱吗？还是说直接到了地方才知道？

Did she tell you anything about like what type of escape room, or do just roll up to a place and you're surprised?

就是到了地方才知道。

Roll up to a place.

我记得那家店叫‘六十Out’。

It's I believe it was called sixty Out was the company.

它开在一个废弃的购物中心里，位置挺特别的，就在韩国城和西尔弗湖之间。

And it's in like a derelict strip mall on a weird in between neighborhood, like in between Koreatown and Silver Lake.

挺有意思的。

Cool.

是啊。

Yeah.

对。

Yeah.

我当时就想，哦，不错。

And I'm like, oh, cool.

我们十点半就到了，来这儿翻垃圾桶，或者干点别的该干的事。

We're here at 10:30AM to dumpster dive or whatever we're supposed to be doing.

我给你点线索吧。

And I'm gonna put you some context clues.

60 Out，意思就是你得在六十分钟内逃出去。

60 out you have sixty minutes to get out.

真聪明。

Smart.

我倒没往这上面想。

I hadn't thought about that.

哦，原来你是去玩了密室逃脱。

Oh, you had to to an escape room.

下次带我去吧。

Take me next time.

好。

Okay.

所以你也跟我说说这事儿吧。

So and and bring me into this.

其实咱们先别急着开始，不如先聊聊逃出密室到底是怎么一回事？

Actually, before we even do this, why don't we zoom out and just talk about how escape rooms work?

我从来没玩过这个。

I have never done this.

你能大概讲讲，逃出密室是个什么样的玩法吗？

Can you describe just sort of broadly what an escape room is?

当然可以。

Yes.

这些公司管这叫沉浸式互动体验，听起来可能是你听过最啰嗦的术语了，不过没错。

So the companies themselves call it an immersive interactive experience, which is maybe the most jargony thing you've ever heard an experience, but yes.

对。

Yes.

简单说，就是你进到一个有主题的房间里。

Basically, you go into a themed room.

对。

Mhmm.

想象一下那种每个房间都有不同主题的廉价旅馆。

Think like a cheesy motel that would have different themes to each room.

海盗、海底、太空，什么主题都行。

Pirates, undersea, outer space, whatever the theme is.

是的。

Yeah.

我挺期待的。

I'm excited.

而且里面的布景还挺酷的。

And there's, like, pretty cool set deck.

看起来有点像私立高中的舞台剧。

It kind of looks like a a private high school's play.

你就会觉得，哎，他们在这上面确实花了点钱。

You know, you're like, oh, they spent some money on this.

这看起来不错。

This looks good.

还有一个解谜高手，按我的经验，通常是个十九岁左右的男孩，头发又长又乱，留着山羊胡。

And there's a puzzle master, which in my experience is usually a 19 year old boy with kind of long stringy hair and a goatee.

对。

Mhmm.

他会讲解游戏规则和房间背后的故事。

And he explains the rules of the game and the story of the room.

对。

Mhmm.

然后你就得完成一个任务，比如救出家族族长，或者找到藏起来的宝藏。

And then you basically have a task, which is, you know, to free the patriarch of the family or find the hidden treasure.

接着是一系列越来越难的实体谜题。

And there's an escalating series of physical puzzles.

实体的。

Physical.

把墙上的这些照片按正确顺序排好，钥匙就会弹出来。

Arrange these photos on the wall in the right order to make this key pop out.

你被困在这样一个主题房间里，六十分钟内解谜找线索，墙上有个大计时器，显示你还有多少时间，你得在倒计时结束前解开最后一个谜题。

So you're in this themed room solving these puzzles, finding clues for sixty minutes, and there's a big timer on the wall that shows you where you're at, and you're trying to solve the last puzzle before the timer.

明白了。

Okay.

这个信息很有用。

So this is good to know.

这个信息很有用。

This is good to know.

所以你最后是卡在60分钟的时候。

So you roll up to 60 out.

对。

Mhmm.

你一进门。

You walk in.

带我看看第一个场景。

Bring me into this first one.

任务是什么？

What was the mission?

我姐姐选了一个以奥林匹斯山为主题的密室逃脱。

My sister had picked a Mount Olympus themed escape room.

挺酷的。

Cool.

我记得目标是结束泰坦和众神之间的战争，恢复奥林匹斯山往日的和平与荣耀。

I believe the objective was to end there was a war between the titans and the gods, And we needed to end it and restore Mount Olympus to its place of peaceful glory.

你们俩周一早上十点半干这个，倒也合理。

That makes sense as a mission for you two on, 10:30 on a Monday.

我觉得是这样。

I I think so.

是的。

Yeah.

得由那位孕妇来完成这个任务。

Pregnant lady is the one to do this.

不是赫拉克勒斯之类的人。

Not Hercules or anything.

应该由我来。

It should be me.

所以，这个谜题的设计者——根据你的描述——是这么告诉你的吗？

And is this puzzle master, I assume, given your description, is telling you this?

你姐姐以前也玩过这种游戏。

You know, your sister has done these before.

这是你第一次听说，说说你现在是什么感受。

This is the first time you're hearing Tell me how this is hitting you.

你是不是翻了个白眼，觉得这太荒唐了？

Are you, like, rolling your eyes like this is ridiculous?

还是你心里想着，走吧，干就完了？

Or are you feeling like, let's go?

我觉得我当时哭了

I think I was crying

他正要说的时候。

as he was going to.

我姐姐听得连连点头。

My sister was nodding avidly at his story.

我已经泪流满面，拼命憋着，心里想着自己的生活。

I was already in tears, like trying to stifle them back thinking about my life.

我觉得那个解谜大师心里肯定在想：这到底发生啥了？

I think the puzzle master was like, what in the hell is going on?

我要轻轻关上门，把这位哭得不行的孕妇留在里面。

I'm gonna close the door gently behind this sobbing pregnant woman.

但马上他就把门关上，计时器又开始了。

But immediately, he closed the door and the clock went on.

我不确定是不是当年当乖乖高中生时留下的那种 Tracy 情结。

And I don't know if this is the Tracy flick in me left from being like a studious high school student.

我一下子就进入状态了。

I just like went into gear.

哇哦。

Wow.

我当时就想，好吧，我们得干了。

I was like, okay, I think we have to do this.

哦，还有个难题加倒计时？

Oh, a problem and a countdown clock?

不用说了。

Say no more.

我心里突然一亮，就觉得我必须解开它。

And something just clicked inside of me, and I was like, I have to solve this.

这道题摆在我面前，我是能解出来的。

This is a problem before me that I can solve.

跟我详细说说那种感觉。

Tell me more about that feeling.

自从离婚后，你有这种感觉吗？

Had you felt that way since the divorce?

完全没有。

Absolutely not.

完全没有。

Absolutely not.

当时我甚至没意识到，这是我第一次不再纠结自己的处境。

I didn't even realize at the time that I was for the first time not thinking about my circumstances.

我根本没想起自己怀孕这回事。

I didn't even think about the fact I was pregnant.

眼前就摆着一个简单的谜题，还有倒计时，我就专心解谜了。

I was just there was a simple puzzle objective in front of me and a countdown clock, and I just focus on the puzzle.

那种感觉真的特别轻松。

And it was such a relief.

接下来呢？

What's next?

我们到了奥林匹斯山，但我觉得不是那样。

We get out on Mount Olympus, and then I believe no.

对。

Yeah.

我们就只是在奥林匹斯山。

We're just at Mount Olympus.

你知道这事是怎么发生的。

You know how that happened.

我和我妹妹在奥林匹斯山下了车。

Me and my sister get off at Mount Olympus.

是的。

Yeah.

在西尔弗湖有个购物中心，能带你去奥林匹斯山。

Strip mall in Silver Lake that takes you to Mount Olympus.

我记得你当时进了，呃，那是六年前的事了。

I believe you went into I mean, this was six years

但那是以前的事了

But ago

有个特别漂亮的圆形大厅，四周是爱奥尼柱，估计是纸板做的，毕竟这是个密室逃脱。

kind of this beautiful heavenly circle with ionic columns that were probably made out of cardboard because it is an escape room.

但后来有个地板突然打开了。

But at some point, a trap door opens.

我知道这事。

I know that.

这间房里就这点小瑕疵。

That was the one hiccup in this room.

我完全沉浸进去了。

I was so into it.

到了第四十五分钟，通往地下的暗门打开了。

And then at minute forty five, the trap door to go underground opened.

那就是米诺陶斯的洞穴。

It was the Minotaurs Cave.

哦，太棒了。

Oh, cool.

我当时就想，我这感觉跟怀孕似的，可没法从这儿爬过去。

And I was like, I feel like I'm pregnant and shouldn't slither through this one.

于是我妹妹下去了，我就在那儿等着，看她把矿洞尽头的线索找完。

So my sister gets down to do it, and I just I'm kind of waiting her for her to, you know, spelunk to the end of the Minotaur's cave.

然后她回来找你了吗？

And then does she come get you?

你当时是怎么做的？

Like, what do you do?

不是那样的。

How does that No.

她出来的时候，手里拿着一把钥匙，那是迷宫尽头的最后一个线索。

She came out with there was a key at the end of the Minotaur's cave as which was the final clue.

然后我们得用它打开那个盒子，把和平条约送到奥林匹斯山。

And then we had to unlock the box that would bring the peace treaty to Mount Olympus.

但那时候她在里面摸索，我闲着没事，过去的事突然一股脑儿全想起来了。

But during that time when she was slithering around and I had nothing to do but wait, things came flooding back to me.

我想问一下，是不是就像刚醒来的那一刻，你一下子又想起了自己的处境？

Going to ask, was it like that moment upon waking where you kind of recognized again your circumstance?

是的。

Yes.

天哪。

Shoot.

事情就这么突然发生了。

It happened that fast.

对。

Yeah.

她终于从迷宫里出来了。

So she came out of the minotaur's cave.

我的意思是，她花了大概五分钟。

I mean, it took her about five minutes.

她真的得爬着走。

She really had to slither.

我又感到很难过。

And I was like, sad again.

但后来我们成功逃出了密室。

But we then solved the escape room.

我们做到了。

We did it.

我觉得那个管理员对我们印象挺深的。

I think the guy was very impressed with us.

当你在

When you are

那里，和你姐姐一起凯旋时，让我也进入你的身体和你的思绪里。

there, triumphant with your sister, bring me into your body and your brain.

我的意思是，这对你来说，真的就是一场逃离。

I mean, feels like, you know, quite literally, this was an escape for you.

回家路上，你那时候感觉怎么样？

How were you feeling, I don't know, in in the moments after in the car ride home?

我感到如释重负，我觉得这可能是成年人能体会到的最棒的情绪了。

I was feeling relief, which I really think is the greatest emotion you can have as an adult.

就是一种彻底的放松。

Just relief.

我终于能从那种全身心的紧张状态里抽身了——那种持续的焦虑、喉咙发紧、身体紧绷的感觉，在解谜的那段时间里，总算消失了。

You know, I think I was able to get out of, you know, just a full nervous system response, just constant dread and the lump in your throat, like the physical symptoms for at least a good chunk of that escape room were gone.

回家的路上，她还打算再待五天。

And I think on the way home, she was staying about five more days.

我妹妹。

Your sister.

我妹妹。

My sister.

我说我还想再玩一次，这可是过去六周以来，我第一次主动提出要做什么事。

And I said, I would do another one, which is the first time I had offered to do anything in the last six weeks.

这可是你自己做出的决定。

That's you making a decision.

其实啊，密室逃脱就是一连串快速做出的决定。

And actually, you know, the escape room is a series of very quick, rapid decisions.

我觉得，经历了那段完全动弹不得的时期后，你终于得果断行动了，而你也确实做到了。

I mean, it strikes me that after this period of feeling completely paralyzed, this was a moment where you had to be extremely decisive, and you were.

对。

Yes.

这意味着你非得再玩一次密室逃脱吗？

Did that mean to you that, like, you had to do another escape room?

是因为你发现了这个东西，所以觉得非做不可？

Like, it felt imperative to do one because you'd found this thing?

或者

Or

我确实很好奇。

I definitely felt curious about it.

我注意到，这是自从出事以来，除了睡觉之外，我第一次没有一直想着它。那时候我才意识到，我其实一直在用各种方式直面问题——比如做心理咨询、接受灵气疗愈，还有跟人倾诉。

I noticed that this was basically the first time besides for sleep when I wasn't thinking about it and thought, you know, I was doing all these things that address the problem head on, like therapy and Reiki, and you're talking through it.

对我来说，我特别害怕自己会失去照顾这个即将来到这个世界的生命的能力。

And I think for me, I was so scared that I was gonna be incapable of taking care of this human life that was about to come into the world.

仅仅只是完成一个把肖像画按顺序挂墙上的简单拼图，就让我感到前所未有的成就感。

Just feeling capable of a dumb puzzle of putting portraits in order on a wall was such a gratifying feeling.

自从那件事发生后，我第一次觉得自己在任何方面都不再有能力了。

I just hadn't felt capable in any way since it happened.

这就像一个刺绣靠垫上写的那句话：我能应对困难的事。但说实话，我真的很需要这样的证明。

And it was just proof as, you know, a stitch pillow might say, I could do hard things, but I kind of needed that.

我太需要这样的肯定了，需要有人告诉我，我大脑里那个能解决问题的部分还没有消失。

I just needed that so much, like some validation that that part of my brain still works.

你能做到。

That you could do it.

对。

Yes.

我们马上回来。

We'll be right back.

你又和你妹妹一起去玩密室逃脱了，是吧？

Your sister you do another escape room with your sister, it sounds like?

对。

Yes.

不过她后来就不跟你一起玩了，你算是正式入了密室逃脱这个圈子。

She eventually leaves, though, your entrance into the escape room community.

她走了之后，你接下来打算怎么办？

So once she's gone, what's your plan?

你一个人做什么？

What do you do?

我开始一个人白天去玩，说实话，那场面简直太奇怪了。

I start doing them by myself during the day, which is such I can't tell you what a crazy sight this is.

首先，一个人去本身就挺怪的。

One, it's just weird to go.

我不明白他们为啥总安排上午十点半的场次，

I don't know why they have ten thirty AM time slots,

但就是这么安排的。

but they do.

确实挺早的。

Early.

是啊。

Yeah.

感觉确实有点早。

It feels a little early.

而且既然是团体活动，一般人会这么想吧。

And it is like a group activity, one would assume.

对吧？

Right?

所以一个人去，也总觉得有点怪。

So going alone also feels

太奇怪了。

so weird.

很特别。

Unique.

有些根本没法一个人完成。

Some of them aren't even possible to do alone.

得有一个人站在这标记上，另一个人去做那边的动作。

You need someone to stand on this mark while the other person does that.

遇到这种，解谜主持人就会进来帮我。

And for those, the puzzle master would just come in and help me.

这些本来就是设计来促进团队协作的。

They're literally supposed to be for group bonding.

但我发现自己越来越擅长了。

But I found I got better and better at them.

对。

Uh-huh.

我发现我完全沉浸到了谜题里。

And I found just I could fully lose myself in the puzzle.

我就突然明白了。

I just was like, got that.

我把这些线索拼在一起。

I'll put these clues together.

我根本不会去想未来的事。

And I did not think at all about the future.

我就能完全活在当下。

I could just be in the moment.

这是唯一能让我专注当下的事。

It was the only thing that brought me to the moment.

你要是拍电影的话，给我来个你在密室逃脱的蒙太奇片段。

Give me like a you're you're in the movie biz.

给我看看你在这些密室里是怎么闯关的，就像电影里的那种快剪镜头。

Give me like the movie montage of you in these escape rooms.

你知道吗，第一关的时候，你看到什么了？

You know, first slot, like, what are you seeing?

场景是什么样的？

What are the sets?

有哪些谜题？

What are the puzzles?

你遇到了哪些人？

Who are the people you're meeting?

要是能描述一下，就给我还原一下那个片段吧。

Like, give me that montage if you can.

我玩过一个黑手党主题的密室，最后那个被黑手党杀害的人的骨头突然掉在了我身上。

I did a mafia escape room where at the end, the bones of the guy the mafia killed fall out on you.

我当时就惊了。

And I was like, woah.

这种场景能用在孕妇身上吗？

Can I do that to a pregnant woman?

我觉得你的怀孕本身也是一件事

I do feel like also your pregnancy is something that

我懂。

I know.

肯定有点吓人。

Must have been a little scary.

有一个场景是氧气快耗尽了，你得赶紧去运氧气回来。

Space one where the stakes are you're running out of oxygen, so you have to bring oxygen back.

我当时真的完全代入了，紧张得不行。

And I was really able to fall for the stakes, I would get really nervous.

是啊。

Yeah.

但我认为这样挺好。

But I think that was good.

因为我信了，才能全身心投入进去。

My ability to believe it let me really hone in.

是的。

Yeah.

我演过最搞笑的一个角色是‘链子上的僵尸’，就是让一个演员独自扮演一位孕妇。

The funniest one I did is I did zombie on a chain, which involves a live actor just alone as a pregnant woman.

哦，你得详细说说这个场景。

Oh, you gotta describe that one.

你不能光说‘链子上的僵尸’，好像谁都知道这是啥一样。

You can't say zombie on a chain like I know what zombie on a chain is.

那‘链子上的僵尸’到底是什么情况？

So what was happening in zombie on a chain?

其实这名字本身就已经说明白了。

Well, it turns out it's very self descriptive.

当然。

Sure.

房间里一端有个演员，身上拴着链条，扮演一个僵尸。

There's an actor who is a zombie on a chain at one end of the room.

每过五分钟，链条就会松开一英寸左右。

And every five minutes that goes by, the chain loosens up about an inch.

一旦僵尸抓到你，游戏就结束了。

And if the zombie gets you, the game is over.

所以这不光是看时间长短。

So it's not just time.

关键是僵尸能不能够到你并对你发起攻击。

It's like if the zombie can reach you and attack you.

挺吓人的。

It's like scary.

就像鬼屋和密室逃脱的结合体。

It's like haunted house ex escape room type thing

跨界合作。

collab.

没错。

Exactly.

那时候我怀孕快八个月了，差不多八个月零一周。

And this I was about eight months pregnant, maybe eight months in a week.

天哪。

Oh my god.

说实话，我反而把那个真人演员吓到了。

Truly, I scared the live actor more than he scared me.

他特别担心我会被吓到早产。

He really was worried about, like, sending me into labor.

所以他根本没使出全力。

So he was like, like, really not giving in his all.

有一会儿他还说：‘你挺好的。’

And at one point, was like, you're doing okay.

我说：别演了。

And I'm like, don't put a character.

别装了。

Don't put character.

这可是我付的钱。

I paid for this.

那个拴着链子的僵尸还冲我喊：嘿，女士。

The zombie on a chain is like, hey, lady.

你听我说。

Listen.

我可不想担这个责任。

I don't wanna be responsible for anything like that.

没错。

Yes.

他说：这事儿要惹上官司了。

He's like, there's a lawsuit here.

我可不打算。

I'm not gonna

你倒说，这可是我付的钱。

have You're like, I paid for this.

天哪。

Oh my god.

这事儿处理得真不错，你是在那个链着的僵尸之前就解决了吗？

That's so well, did you did you solve it before the zombie on joint?

我解决了。

I did.

我解决了。

I did.

这些你都搞定啦？

Are you solving all of these?

我正在处理。

I I'm solving

结果我发现我在这方面还挺在行的。

turns out I'm also good at this.

听上去确实如此。

I mean, it's sounding like it.

这些听起来好复杂啊。

Like, these sound complicated.

这些明明很难，你却把所有房间都逃出来了。

These sound, like, difficult, and it seems like you escaped from all of these rooms.

是的。

Yes.

大概有一两个我没赶在时限前完成，但差点就成功了。

I think there were one or two I didn't make it in time but got close.

但即便如此，那种成就感还是特别棒。

But even then, it just is such a nice sense of accomplishment.

对。

Yeah.

这其实没什么意义。

It is meaningless.

你身处一个完全虚构的故事里，在一个完全虚构的世界中，可解出谜题的感觉却特别好。

You're in a totally made up story in a totally made up land, but it feels so good to solve something.

你是在说，那些时刻里，你会觉得自己有能力，会感到放松，会完全沉浸其中。

You're talking about how in these moments, feel capable, you feel relief, you feel locked in.

没错。

I mean Yes.

你会有一种极度专注的状态，让其他一切都变得无关紧要。

You feel this kind of intense focus that allows all things to fall away.

我有点好奇，当这种感觉如此强烈、如此解脱的时候，会不会有回落？

I guess I wonder, like, when it's such a high like that, when it's such relief, is there a comedown?

你从那些房间出来后，会不会觉得天啊，我得回到现实生活中了？还是说，现实反而没那么可怕了？

Like, would you leave these rooms and feel like, oh my god, I gotta go back to my real life, or did real life start to feel a little less scary?

可能还是挺吓人的，但我确实觉得，它慢慢没那么可怕了。

It might it was still terrifying, but I do think it started to feel a little less scary.

你知道吗，我刚开始玩这些密室的时候，连婴儿房都没准备。

You know, at the same time, when I started doing these rooms, I hadn't even planned a nursery.

我根本没地方让宝宝睡觉。

There was nowhere for my baby to sleep.

我让我爸妈去买婴儿家具，然后我就进去玩《阿耳忒弥斯2号》，救飞船脱离太空危机。

I sent my parents out to buy baby furniture, And then I would go in and I would save, you know, Artemis two from space peril.

对。

Right.

玩完了再出来。

And then come out.

我还和我妈一起去Mini Crate & Barrel逛，挑了换尿布台。

And I think I went shopping at mini Crate and Barrel with my mom for a changing table.

你知道吗，那时候我觉得自己总算做成了点事。

You know, it was like I accomplished something there.

我慢慢让自己的大脑和身体重新适应解决问题的感觉。

I got my brain and body used to the feeling of solving things again.

之后我才慢慢能把它迁移到别的事情上。

And then I was able to translate a little bit.

但我真不觉得我能解决自己的生活，或者想清楚宝宝出生后我会怎样，又或者制定出一个让人安心的未来计划。

I don't think I could solve my life or figure out what was going to happen to me after the baby came or come up with a satisfying plan for the future.

但我能一点一点地，把未来的事情慢慢安排好。

But I could take care of things increment by increment into the future.

我现在能为宝宝的房间做规划了。

I could plan my baby's room now.

说实话，这种感觉真的很有力。

That feels really powerful, honestly.

虽然你说是一点一点来的，但以前你肯定不会跟妈妈一起去宜家买东西。

Even though you say it's increment by increment, going to Home Depot with your mom, does not sound like something you could have done before the escape rooms.

没错。

No.

确实以前做不到。

It absolutely wasn't.

我觉得另一部分原因是，我一直很自责，觉得自己忽略了婚姻里的种种信号——没注意到丈夫那么不开心，没察觉那些明显的线索。

And I think another aspect of it was I was feeling so bad about myself for either ignoring or missing the signs of my marriage, you know, for not noticing that my husband was so unhappy, for not picking up on the clues.

我一直以为自己是个敏锐、有直觉的人，可这件事彻底动摇了我对自己的信心。直到后来，我走进密室，找到藏宝的线索，才重新感觉到：哦，我其实还是能看清事情的。

And I always thought I was an observant, intuitive person, and it totally broke my confidence in that notion that going into a room and finding clues for where the pirate's treasure is made me feel like, okay, I can see things.

我的意思是，也许我在察觉情绪信号这方面不太行。

I mean, maybe I'm less good at the emotional clues.

但至少我能找到藏宝的位置。

But But you're I can find clues for where the treasure is.

对。

Yes.

嗯，倒也不是。

Like well, no.

我的意思是，我也能理解这一点。

I mean, that that makes sense to me too.

就像我们之前说的，这类事情会让你对自己的身份产生怀疑。

It's like, yeah, we talked about how these kinds of things just sort of your identity is thrown into question.

你以前觉得能做的事，现在全都不行了。

All these abilities, whatever, like, things you thought you could do, you can't do anymore.

所以我觉得，你重新找回这种细致观察的能力，其实很自然。

And so it makes sense to me that even this ability to, like, look really closely would feel like something you were reclaiming almost.

没错。

Absolutely.

你离开的时候有给小费吗？

Did you, like, tip them a lot when you left

逃出密室的时候？

the escape room?

我给了。

I did.

我给了。

I did.

我觉得我肯定会给五百块之类的。

I feel like I would be like, here's $500 or something.

你们帮我的地方太多了，你们

You guys are helping me more than you You

说实话，我真没想到，逃出密室居然真的救了我一命。

know, it felt crazy to be earnestly escape rooms really saved my life.

但他们确实做到了。

But they did.

我是把它变成了一段经历，但他们真的帮了我。

I mean, I turned it into a bit, but they did.

是的。

Yeah.

你提到一天中最糟的部分，就是醒来后想起来那些事。

You mentioned the worst part of your day being waking up and remembering.

你开始玩密室逃脱后，这种情况有减少吗？

Was that happening to you less when you started doing escape rooms?

有预约密室逃脱的那天，确实有好转。

On the days I had an escape room booked, yes.

醒来的时候，还是会有那种心头一沉的感觉。

I mean, there's still that initial gut punch when you wake up.

但紧接着，我就想起：哦，我上午十一点还有场密室。

And then immediately after the gut punch, I think, oh, I have an 11AM booked.

你知道，你至少能知道接下来要做什么，这样就减轻了那种对未知的恐惧。

You know, you kind of know what you're gonna do in the immediate future, and it lessens the unknown horror of it all.

是的。

Yeah.

同时，听起来你正在为宝宝准备空间。

And meanwhile, it sounds like you are preparing space for the baby.

我是说，实实在在地在布置婴儿床和各种用品。

I mean, literally, physically with the crib and all the stuff.

情感上，你也更能想象自己会怎样照顾这个孩子了。

And emotionally, it seems like you're better able to imagine, you know, caring for this Yes.

孩子。

Child.

当然，你不可能一直这样下去。

And, of course, you can't keep doing it.

你马上就要怀孕了，每天都在接近这个时刻。

Like, you are getting pregnant or in pregnant or by the day.

对。

Right.

所以你终究得停下来。

So you had to end it at some point.

是的。

Yes.

你还记得吗？快到预产期的时候，我的产科医生说：好了。

Do you remember your last remember very close to my due date, my OB was like, okay.

你的分娩计划是什么？

So what is the birth plan?

就是说

Which is

你跟产科医生提过这个吗？

you tell your OB about about this?

这个。

This.

我不这么认为。

I don't think so.

开玩笑的。

Just kidding.

好吧。

Okay.

你继续说。

Keep talking.

他们

They

问我说，分娩计划是什么？

were like, what is the birth plan?

她说她问过了。

She said she asked.

我一直拖着没定，因为我也不清楚。

And I had been putting it off because I didn't know.

我就说，我不知道。

I'm like, I don't know.

如果孩子不自己出来，我要不要催产呢？

Do I wanna be induced if it doesn't come out?

有好多问题都要回答，可我一直拖着没答。

There's all these questions you have to answer, and I had been putting off answering any questions.

我之前玩过五六间密室逃脱，那时候我才突然明白，我想好了。

And I think I might have done maybe five or six escape rooms when I was like, oh, I think I know what I wanna do.

等等。

Wait.

我当时就想，

And I was like

劳伦，这真的让我特别感动。

Lauren, that is really it's really moving to me, actually.

哎呀。

Like Aw.

你已经玩过五六间密室了。

You'd worked five or six escape rooms.

你居然用这个来衡量时间，我真的很喜欢这一点。

That is your measure of time, which I really like.

是的。

Yes.

那你后来定下的计划是什么？

And so what was the plan that you came up with?

你还是做出了这些决定。

You were able to make these decisions.

所以当时你决定的是……

So what was the

什么决定？

decision?

对。

Yeah.

我觉得我不希望分娩的时候措手不及。

I I think I didn't want to be surprised by birth.

那实在太吓人了。

It was that was too scary.

我生活中曾经遭遇过一次巨大的意外，彻底打乱了我的世界。

I just had a big surprise in my life that offended my world.

所以我选择了催产。

So I chose to be induced.

我们定好了催产的日期。

We set a date to be induced.

尽管那时候全球新冠疫情正全面爆发，我还是觉得这个决定很好。

And besides for it being the first week of full blown COVID everywhere, I really liked that decision.

我知道自己即将经历什么，心里有种掌控感。

I was like, I know exactly what's happening to me, and I feel in control of the situation.

天哪。

Oh my god.

但那时候正好是疫情啊。

Was COVID, though.

这真的太强烈了。

That's really intense.

那时候就是疫情。

It was COVID.

实在太紧张了。

It was so intense.

我戴着N95口罩生的孩子。

I gave birth in a full blown n 95 mask.

孩子一出来，他们就把姐姐赶出去了。

They kicked my sister out after

天哪。

Oh, man.

孩子出生了。

The baby came out.

那时候真的有一刻，我在口罩里吐了，当时我就觉得

It was really at one point, I threw up in my mask, and I was

我得换一下。

like, I need a change.

天哪。

My god.

那真的太煎熬了。

That was really intense.

你生孩子的时候有你姐姐在场，听起来是家人陪着的。

You do this with your sister, sounded like with family present.

那时候你前夫在场吗？

Is your ex husband in the picture at all at this time?

现在？不在。

Right now, no.

因为

Because

就在那一刻。

In that moment.

去医院只能带一个人，我根本不想要他。

You could only bring one person to the hospital, and I did not want him.

我想带我妹妹去。

I wanted my sister.

但孩子出生后，我们回到公寓，他很快就出现了，过来照顾孩子，像个父亲一样陪伴左右。

But after the baby was born and we got back to my apartment, he came into the picture very soon and came over and was a dad and had spent time.

现在我们平分育儿责任，各占一半。

And now we co parents 50%, fiftyfifty.

所以现在一切都挺好。

So things are good.

他是个非常尽责、充满爱意的爸爸。

You know, he's a very present loving parent.

就在那一刻，我想一直留在那个时刻。

In that moment, I wanna stay in that moment.

你知道吗，我听过很多妈妈这么说，包括我自己。

You know, I've heard this from, you know, many mothers, my own included.

你刚生完孩子，人家就说你感觉像被丢下了一样。

You know, you're handed this you'd said you felt alien.

人家直接把你扔给一个完全陌生的婴儿。

You're handed basically this alien.

然后他们就说：好了。

And they're like, okay.

回家吧。

Go home.

你心里想：什么？

And you're like, what?

你懂我的意思吧？

You know?

这下全得我一个人扛了？

Like, this is on me now?

这确实如此。

This is Yeah.

你之前提到过，当时你根本无法理解，自己怎么可能会照顾好这个女儿。

And you'd mentioned being just you you know, it was like incomprehensible to you how you could care for this baby, this daughter.

你有个女儿，对吧？

You had a daughter.

是的。

Right?

对。

Mhmm.

头几天、头几周和她在一起的时候，真实情况是怎样的？

What was the reality of these first days, weeks with her?

你当时能做决定吗？

Did you were you able to make decisions?

你知道该怎么做吗？

Did you know what to do?

是的。

Yeah.

不知怎么的，一切都特别美好。

I somehow, it was wonderful.

她出生后，我感觉完全不像产后抑郁，反而像被唤醒了一样。

She came out and it felt like I had the opposite of postpartum depression.

它好像一下子把我拉了回来。

It like snapped me back somehow.

这真是太好了。

That's really wonderful.

我觉得自己完全准备好应对了。

I felt ready to handle it.

因为当时是疫情期间，我们基本都待在公寓里，确实挺隔离的。

And because it was COVID and we were kind of isolated to our apartments Sure.

我一点都没觉得错过了什么。

It I really didn't feel like I was missing out on anything.

你知道吗，就算有孩子，我本来也会这样宅在家里。

You know, this is what I would be doing with a baby anyways, kind of hunkering down.

感觉就像在玩密室逃脱一样。

And it kind of felt like it had an escape room vibe.

我们被困在一个空间里，不过我现在已经习惯了。

Like, I'm like, we're trapped in a space together, and I'm used to this now.

那所以呢？

So what's

这里的任务是什么？

the mission here?

培养一个有同理心、懂得关心他人的成年人，没错。

Raise an adult that's empathetic and caring and yeah.

这一条要难一点，

So that one's a little harder,

而且不是花一个小时就能做到的。

and it takes more than an hour.

你有更长的时间限制。

You get a longer time limit.

太好了。

Thank god.

我在想，

I wonder

你知道吗，在发现这个密室逃脱之前，你对自己能否重新找到爱情还挺担心的。

too, you know, before The Escape Room Discovery, you were nervous about finding romantic connection again.

我也很好奇，这件事后来是怎么发展的。

And I wonder how that progressed too.

其实都是我自己的想法，离婚后我也约会过几个人，都是挺好的人。

It was all in my head, all I of my have dated a couple people, like lovely people since my divorce.

我现在有个特别好的男朋友，他也是个电视剧编剧，也离过婚。

And I'm currently have a very lovely boyfriend who is also a TV writer, also divorced.

我们俩居然特别喜欢一起玩密室逃脱。

And we weirdly love to do escape rooms together.

连这句话都说出来。

Even say that.

你是怎么在个人资料里写的，或者你们在线上认识的时候？

How did you was that, like, on your profile or whatever if you met online?

没有。

No.

没有。

No.

我只好在第一次约会时，把它当个玩笑悄悄带出来。

I had to bury it as kind of a joke in an early date.

你知道的，刚认识一个人，你会说：咱们去看场电影吧。

You know, when you're pitching with someone new, you're like, we could see a movie.

咱们去那家餐厅吃饭吧。

We could go to this restaurant.

咱们去玩个密室逃脱吧。

We could do an escape room.

我就把它夹在一堆选项中间提了出来。

I, like, threw it in the middle of a bunch of options.

他一听就说，我超爱密室逃脱。

And he was like, I love escape rooms.

我就回他，哦，行吧。

And I was like, okay.

现在我们都放开了，不藏着了。

We're masks off now.

我们俩差不多每两周就去玩一次。

So we do them maybe one every two weeks, just the two of us.

真的假的。

No way.

等一下。

Wait.

对。

Yes.

你在大洛杉矶地区快把密室逃脱玩完了吗？

Are you running out of escape rooms in the Greater Los Angeles metropolitan area?

嗯，对。

Okay.

他们每隔几年就会更新一次，不过我们最近放慢了节奏，怕把能玩的都玩光了。

Revamp them every few years, but, like, we've had to slow our roll because we don't wanna run out.

我正想说，这频率也太高了吧。

I was gonna say that's really often.

是的。

Yes.

新开了一家叫Escapeology的密室逃脱公司，我们就去试了。

A new place there's a new company that just opened here called Escapeology.

最近一直在刷他们家的店。

So we've been, like, running through theirs.

你们简直是他们最铁杆的顾客了。

You're like their first and best customers.

每两周来一个，确实挺让人惊艳的。

One every two weeks might wow.

这真是完完整整地转了一圈。

What a truly full circle.

和恋人一起玩密室逃脱是什么感觉？

What does it feel like to do an escape room with, like, with a romantic partner.

他玩得怎么样？其实他

Is he good at them, actually, is

我对象特别擅长这个。

my main very good at that.

明白了。

Okay.

他特别有解谜的头脑。

He's very, like, puzzle brained.

明白了。

Okay.

我还以为会是那种特别震撼、特别圆满的时刻呢。

I thought it was gonna be this grand, like, wow, full circle.

看看我，脑子里想了这么多。

Look at me, all these thoughts I had.

我平时对他玩这个其实就有点烦。

I'm usually just, like, slightly annoyed with him doing them.

我就说，把书给我吧。

I'm like, give me the book.

你一个人霸着书干嘛。

You're hogging the book.

你懂的吧。

You know?

他说，我得先假设是对的。

He's like, I need to assume yeah.

我的意思是，没错。

I mean Yeah.

他是那种人吗？

Is he yeah.

你们在房间里是怎么互动的？

What's your dynamic in the room?

你们是主导者吗？

Are you the leaders?

你们俩都是主导者，所以才这么难搞？

He are you both leaders and that's why it's tough?

我们俩都是主导者。

We're both leaders.

明白了。

Okay.

我觉得正因如此，只让我们俩才合适。

I think that's why it's good we cap it at just us.

要是拉上朋友，他们肯定会被我们烦死。

I think if we added friends and they would be so annoyed with us.