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大家最近怎么样？
What's happening, people?
欢迎回到节目。
Welcome back to the show.
现在是2025年底了，为了庆祝，我整理了过去十二个月播客中最喜欢的一些精彩片段。
It is the end of 2025, and to celebrate, I've put together a collection of my favorite moments from the podcast over the last twelve months.
有些是你可能已经看过的重磅集数，还有一些你可能错过的，我都把它们以一种有趣的方式串联起来，安排了合适的节奏。
Some huge episodes that you probably saw, some other episodes that maybe you missed, and I've put them all together in an interesting flow and pacing.
我真的非常喜欢这些内容。
And I I really loved all of these.
我爱我所有的节目，我爱我那1040个播客‘孩子’，但这些只是2025年的部分亮点。
I love all of my I love all 1,040 of my podcast children, but these were just some highlights from 2025.
感谢你们所有人在这里。
I appreciate you all for being here.
感谢你们所有人，让《现代智慧》在今年Spotify Wrapped中成为全球第八大播客，这简直不可思议。
I appreciate you all for making Modern Wisdom the eighth biggest podcast in the world according to Spotify Wrapped this year, which is insane.
感谢你们所有的支持、分享和一切。
And, thank you for all the support and all the shares and all the everything.
谢谢你们在我尝试引入你们从未听说过的全新观点和嘉宾时保持耐心。
Thank you for staying patient with me when, I've tried to bring in new ideas and guests that you've never heard of.
我真的非常努力地想要打造一个优质的艺术画廊，即使你们不认识那位艺术家，也很可能喜欢他们的作品。
I really, really do work hard to try and curate a nice art gallery that even if you don't know who the artist is, you're probably going to enjoy their work.
感谢你们一路陪伴我探索那些你们从未预料到会喜欢的深度话题，感谢你们所有的评论和支持，尤其是今年比以往任何时候都更感激。
So thank you for sticking with me as I go down rabbit holes that you didn't know that you're going to enjoy and commenting in all of the support and and everything, especially this year more than ever.
这对我来说意义非凡。
It's meant an awful lot to me.
所以，是的，我由衷地感谢你们每一个人。
So, yeah, I I appreciate every single one of you.
在开始之前，你们需要做一个年终回顾，我用来做自我回顾的方法，是我从全球最顶尖的效率专家那里学来的，地址是 chriswillx.com/review。
Before we get into it, you need to do an end of year review, and the review process that I use for myself that I've stolen from all the best productivity guys on the planet is at chriswillx.com/review.
已经有十万人，甚至数十万人下载并使用它来完成自己的回顾，而且完全免费。
100 thousands literally hundreds of thousands of people have recorded it and done their work on it already, and you can get it for free.
把它复制到你的笔记应用中，完成你的年终回顾。
Copy it into your notes app and do your end of your review.
所以是 chriswillx.com/review。
So chriswillx.com/review.
总之，圣诞快乐。
Anyway, Merry Christmas.
新年快乐。
Happy New Year.
我们开始吧。
Let's get into it.
世界上最糟糕的结果就是没有自尊。
The worst outcome in the world is not having self esteem.
为什么？
Why?
是的。
Yeah.
这确实是个难题。
It's a tough one.
我观察那些人，我不想冒犯任何人，但我看到那些不喜欢自己的人，那是最艰难的处境，因为他们总是在与自己较劲。
I I I I look at the people, and I I don't wanna offend anybody, but I look at the people who don't like themselves, and that's the toughest slot because they're always wrestling with themselves.
面对外部世界已经够难了，没有人会比你自己更喜欢你。
And it's hard enough to face the outside world, and no one's gonna like you more than you like yourself.
所以如果你自己都在挣扎，那么外部世界就会变成一个无法逾越的挑战。
So if you're struggling with yourself, then the outside world becomes an insurmountable challenge.
而且很难说为什么人们会缺乏自尊心。
And it's hard to say why people have low self esteem.
可能是遗传因素。
It might be genetic.
也可能只是环境所致。
It might just be circumstantial.
很多时候，我认为是因为他们在童年时期没有得到无条件的爱，这种缺失会深深渗透到核心层面。
A lot of times, I think it's because they just weren't unconditionally loved as a child, and that sort of seeps in at a deep core level.
但自尊问题可能是最具限制性的。
But self esteem issues can be the most limiting.
一个有趣的想法是，某种程度上，自尊是你给自己建立的声誉。
One interesting thought is that, you know, to some extent, self esteem is a reputation you have with yourself.
你时时刻刻都在观察自己。
You're watching yourself at all times.
你知道自己在做什么，并且你有自己的道德准则。
You know what you're doing, and you have your own moral code.
每个人都有不同的道德准则。
Everyone has a different moral code.
但如果你无法达到自己的道德标准——也就是你用来要求他人的那个标准——就会损害你的自尊。
But if you don't live up to your own moral code, the same code that you hold others to, it will damage your self esteem.
因此，提升自尊的一种方式可能是严格遵守自己的准则。
So perhaps one way to build up your self esteem is to live up to your own code very rigorously.
先确立一个准则，然后严格执行它。
Have one and then live up to it.
提升自尊的另一种方式可能是为他人做些事情。
Another way to raise your self esteem might be to do things for others.
如果我回顾我的人生，想想哪些时刻真正让我感到自豪？
If I look back on my life and, you know, what are the moments that I'm actually proud of?
这样的时刻少之又少，其实并不常见。
There's very far and few between, and it's not that often.
并不是你所预期的那些事情。
It's not the things you would expect.
不是物质上的成功。
It's not the material success.
也不是学会了这样或那样的技能。
It's not having learned this thing or that.
而是当我为某人或我所爱的事物做出牺牲的时候。
It's when I made a sacrifice for somebody or something that I loved.
而正是在那时，我反而最感到自豪。
And, that's when I'm actually ironically most proud.
这虽然是通过一种明确的心理练习实现的，但我敢打赌，在某种层面上，我其实也在潜意识里记录着这些。
Now that's through an explicit mental exercise, but I'll bet you at some level, I'm recording that implicitly.
所以这告诉我，即使我没有被爱，创造爱的方式也是给予爱，通过牺牲和责任来表达爱。
So that tells me that even if I am not being loved, then the way to create love is to give love, to to express love through sacrifice and through duty.
因此，我认为做这样的事情能迅速提升你的自尊。
And so I think doing things like that can build up your self esteem really fast.
当你谈到牺牲时，这很有趣，因为很多时候，人们会说：‘我为工作付出了这么多。’
It's interesting when you talk about sacrifice because a lot of the time, people say, well, I sacrificed so much for my job.
是的。
It's like, yeah.
但那其实是你为了自己更想要的东西，而放弃了相对没那么想要的东西，而不是真正地承受了某种代价。
But that was you sacrificing something that you wanted less for something that you wanted more as opposed to genuinely taking some sort of cost.
而且，是的，我很好奇，如果自尊意味着你的行为与你的价值观保持一致，即使在困难时，甚至更困难时也如此，那么那些更内省、更有原则的人是否会因此付出某种代价？因为他们背负着更沉重的负担，需要以某种方式支付。
And, yeah, I wonder whether if self esteem is you adhering to your internal your your actions and to your values aligning, even when it's difficult or perhaps even more so when it's difficult, I wonder whether there is a price that people who are more introspective, high integrity pay because and think, well, you've got this, heavier set of overheads that you need to pay in some way.
如果遵守道德是有利可图的，那每个人都会这么做。
Well, if being ethical were profitable, everybody would do it.
对吧？
Right?
嗯哼。
So Mhmm.
在某种程度上，这确实涉及牺牲，但这种牺牲也可以被看作是着眼于长远而非短期的思考。
You at some level, it does involve a sacrifice, but that sacrifice can also be thought of as you're thinking for the long term rather than the short term.
例如，美德是一组信念，如果社会中的每个人都能作为个体遵循它们，就会为所有人带来双赢的结果。
For example, the virtues are the set of virtues are set of beliefs that if everybody in society followed them as individuals, it would lead to win win outcomes for everybody.
如果我诚实，你也诚实，那么我们就能更轻松地做生意。
So if I am honest and you are honest, then we can do business more easily.
我们可以更轻松地互动，因为我们能够彼此信任。
We can interact more easily because we can trust each other.
即使系统中存在少数骗子，只要骗子和作弊者不是太多，一个每个人都诚实的高信任社会会更好。
So even though there might be a few liars in the system, as long as there aren't too many liars and too many cheaters, a high trust society where everybody's honest is better off.
我认为许多美德都是这样发挥作用的。
And I think a lot of the virtues work this way.
对吧？
Right?
如果我不去勾引你老婆，你也不去勾引我老婆，而且我不抢先把桌上所有食物都拿走，等等，那么我们大家相处得更好，也能玩双赢的游戏。
If I don't go around sleeping with your wife and you don't sleep with mine and, you know, if I don't take all the food that's at the table first and so on, then we all get along better, and we can play win win games.
在博弈论中，最著名的博弈是囚徒困境，但那完全是关于所有人都在纳什均衡中作弊。
In game theory, the most famous game is prisoner's dilemma, but that's all about everybody cheating in the Nash equilibrium.
在那里，稳定的均衡状态是所有人都作弊。
The stable equilibrium there is everybody cheats.
而你要想玩双赢游戏，唯一的办法就是进行长期的重复互动。
And your fort the only way you can be you can play a win win game is if you have long term iterated moves.
但那实际上并不是社会中最常见的博弈。
But that's not actually the most common game played in society.
社会中最常见的博弈叫做‘猎鹿博弈’，如果我们合作，就能猎到一头大鹿，两个人都能吃上大餐。
The most common game played is one called a stag's hunt, where if we cooperate, we can bring down a big stag and both have big dinners.
但如果我们不合作，就只能去抓兔子，每个人只能吃上小餐。
But if we don't cooperate, then we have to go hunt like rabbits, and we each have small dinners.
所以，这种游戏有两个稳定的均衡状态。
So most of, and and that game has two stable equilibriums.
一种可能是我们都去猎兔子，另一种可能是我们一起猎鹿。
And one could be where we're both hunting the rabbit, and one could be where we're hunting the stag.
高信任社会是一种更道德的社会，在这里我可以相信你会和我一起猎鹿，准时到场，认真工作，并公平分配猎物。
So the high trust society is a more most more virtuous society where I can trust you to come hunt the stag with me and show up on time and do the work and divide it up properly.
所以，你希望生活在一个每个人都有自己的美德并践行它们的体系中，这样我们都能受益。
So you want to live in a system where everybody has their own set of virtues and follows them, and then we all win.
但我认为，你并不需要为了牺牲才这样做。
But I would argue you don't need to do that for sacrifice.
你不需要为了别人而这样做。
You don't need to do that for other people.
你完全可以只是为了自己而这样做。
You can do it just purely for yourself.
你会拥有更高的自尊。
You will have higher self esteem.
你会吸引其他有高尚品德的人。
You will attract other high virtue people.
我会和自己一起去猎鹿吗？
Would I go on a stag hunt with me?
没错。
Correct.
是的。
Yeah.
正是如此。
That's right.
如果你是一个长期展现出道德和美德的人，那么你就会吸引其他有道德、有美德的人。
And if you're the kind of person if you're the kind of person who long term signals ethics and virtues, then you'll attract other people who are ethical and virtuous.
而如果你像鲨鱼一样，最终你会发现自己完全游弋在鲨鱼群中，那是一种不愉快的生存状态。
Whereas if you are shark, you will eventually find yourself swimming entirely amongst sharks, and that's an unpleasant existence.
但再说一遍，这又回到了棉花糖测试的类比。
But, again, this goes back to the equivalent of the marshmallow test.
顺便说一下，棉花糖实验无法复现。
And by way, the marshmallow test does not replicate.
我亲眼见证了外行星化危机的严峻现实。
I saw the exoplanification crisis hard Right.
最近。
Recently.
但这关乎交易。
But it is about trading
用短期换取长期。
off the short term for the long term.
因此，我认为对于许多所谓的美德，从长远来看，有自私的理由去践行美德。
And so I think for a lot of these so called virtues, there are long term selfish reasons to be virtuous.
是的。
Yeah.
你过去有没有经历过自我怀疑？
Did you deal with self doubt in the past?
这对你来说是一个需要克服的障碍吗？
Is that something that was a hurdle for you to overcome?
是也不是。
Yes and no.
我觉得我确实经历过自我怀疑，比如：我不知道自己在做什么，得想办法弄清楚。
I think I I dealt with self doubt in the sense that, oh, I don't know what I'm doing, and I need to figure it out.
但我并没有像别人比我更懂我、或者我是个傻瓜、我不值得之类的方式怀疑自己，我想我受益于成长过程中充满了爱。
But I didn't doubt myself in the way of somebody else knows better than me for me or that, you know, I'm an idiot or I'm not worthwhile or anything that I I guess I had the benefit of I grew up with a lot of love.
比如，我身边的人无条件地爱我，这给了我很大的自信。
Like, the people around me love me unconditionally, And so that just gave me a lot of confidence.
不是那种认为自己知道一切的自信，而是那种相信自己能弄明白、知道自己想要什么、只有我才能决定什么对我重要的自信。
Not the kind of confidence that would say I have the answer, but the kind of confidence that I will figure it out, and I know what I want, or, only I am a good arbiter of what I want.
是的。
Yeah.
这种程度的自我信念，我想，能让你去确定什么对我重要，我的自尊。
That level of self belief, I suppose, allows you to determine what is it that matters to me, my self esteem.
我该去追求这件事吗？
Should I chase this thing or not?
我可以对此做出公正的判断，而不是被左右，但你提到的这一点非常好：即使你觉得自己没有有意识地记录正在做的事情，有些东西仍然潜藏在你的潜意识里。
I can make a fair judgment on that as opposed to being susswayed, but it's such a good point about even if you think you're not consciously logging the stuff that you're doing, there is some that's in the back of your mind.
是那个守护灵吗？
Was it the daemon?
这是古希腊人之类的人曾经谈论过的吗？
Is that what the ancient Greeks or something used to
谈论过吗？
talk about?
是的，没错。
The the yeah.
在计算机科学中，也有一个叫守护进程的概念，它是一个始终在后台运行的程序。
Also in computer science, like, there's a concept of a daemon, which is a a program that's always running in the background.
你看不见它。
You can't see it.
好的。
Okay.
但没错，这个词很可能源自古希腊的“daimon”。
But, yeah, it probably comes from the ancient Greek daemon.
但没错，你不知道自己知道的东西，远比你意识到自己知道的东西要多。
But, yeah, the I what you know that you don't even know you know is far greater than what you know you know.
对吧？
Right?
你根本无法描述出你所知道的大部分内容。
You can't even articulate most of the things you know.
你有一些感受，却找不到词语来形容。
There are feelings you have that have no words for them.
你有一些想法，是通过身体或潜意识感受到的，却从未对自己明确表达出来。
There are thoughts you have that are felt within the body or subconsciously that you never articulate to yourself.
你其实说不清语法规则，但说话时却能毫不费力地运用它们。
You don't really you can't articulate the rules of grammar, yet you exercise them effortlessly when you speak.
所以我认为，你潜意识里的知识，以及你自己都不知道的知识，远比你能表达和沟通的知识要多得多。
So I I would argue that your implicit knowledge and your knowledge that is unknown to yourself is far greater than the knowledge you can articulate and that you can communicate.
在某种程度上，你总是在观察自己。
And at some level, you're always watching yourself.
这就是你的意识。
That's what your consciousness is.
对吧？
Right?
它在观察一切，包括你的思想，包括你的身体。
It's the thing that's watching everything, including your mind, including your body.
所以，如果你想拥有高的自尊，那就赢得你自己的尊重。
So if you want to have high self esteem, then earn your own self respect.
我有一个想法，叫内在的黄金法则。
I had this idea, the internal golden rule.
黄金法则是说，要像你希望被对待的方式那样去对待别人。
So the golden rule says treat others the way that you should be treated, you want to be treated.
内在的黄金法则说的是：像别人本应对待你那样对待自己。
The internal golden rule says treat yourself like others should have treated you.
嗯哼。
Mhmm.
这是对那些没有在无条件的爱中成长的人的一种回应，是的。
And it was a a repost to maybe people that didn't grow up with unconditional love Yeah.
以这种方式。
In that way.
关于爱这一点，爱的一个有趣之处在于，你可以试着回忆被爱的感觉。
On the love thing, one of the interesting things about love is you can try to remember the feeling of being loved.
所以，回想一下曾经有人爱你、对你倾注爱意的时刻，真正地重温那种感觉。
So go back to when someone was in love with you or someone did love you, and, like, really remember that feeling.
真正地沉浸其中，尝试在自己内心重新唤起那种感觉。
Like, really sit with it and try to recreate it within yourself.
然后去体会你爱别人、陷入爱河时的那种感受。
And then go to the feeling of you loving someone and when you were in love.
我这里说的甚至不一定是指浪漫的爱，所以在这方面要小心一点。
And I'm not even talking about romantic love necessarily, so be a little careful there.
我更多指的是，比如对
I'm talking more about, like, love for
如果你谈论的是过去的浪漫爱情，有时可能会变得复杂。
It can sometimes get complex if you're talking about past romantic love.
对。
Right.
兄弟姐妹、孩子，或者类似的人，或者父母。
A sibling or a child or something like that or or a parent.
想想你曾经对某人或某物产生爱意的时候。
And think about when you felt love towards someone or something.
那么，哪种更好呢？
And now which is better?
我认为，恋爱的感觉实际上比被爱的感觉更令人兴奋。
And I would argue that the feeling of being in love is actually more exhilarating than the feeling of being loved.
被爱有点腻人。
Being loved is a little cloying.
太甜了。
It's a little too sweet.
你有点想把对方推开。
You kinda wanna push the person away.
有点尴尬。
It's a little embarrassing.
你知道，如果对方太投入，你会感到被束缚。
And you know that if that person is too much into it that you feel constrained.
另一方面，恋爱的感觉非常开阔。
On the other hand, the feeling of being in love is very expansive.
非常开放。
It's very open.
它实际上让你成为更好的自己。
It actually makes you a better version of yourself.
它让你想成为更好的人。
It makes you wanna be a better person.
所以你可以随时创造爱。
And so you can create love anytime you want.
真正的问题在于那种渴望被爱的冲动。
It's just that craving to receive it that's the problem.
周六我去了奥斯汀的一场日间浩室音乐派对。
I went to this daytime house music party in Austin on Saturday.
它叫Mushroom Cowboy。
It's called Mushroom Cowboy.
所以这是一场Micrudosta类型的活动吗？
So it's a Micrudosta kind of event?
我不知道。
I don't know.
我觉得他们似乎在暗示这一点，但场地其实是在国会街一家咖啡店外的咖啡馆里。
I think they're kind of hinting at that, but it's in a coffee well, was outside of a coffee shop off Congress.
是的。
Yeah.
所以我十点半到的。
So I turn up at half ten.
活动十点开始，但买咖啡的队伍长达250码。
It started at ten, and the queue is 250 yards long for coffee.
什么？
What?
那里肯定有1500人。
And there must have been 1,500 people there.
有个人带了一条法棍面包。
One guy brought a baguette.
他拿着法棍面包兴奋地狂舞。
He was raving with his baguette.
那些狗啊，你知道的，外表看起来挺正经的。
Those dogs, you know, pretty pretty sober looking from the outside.
也许有些人吸大麻。
Maybe some people smoking weed.
但我认为，这可能是我们见证硬核饮酒文化走向终结的开端。
But, I think this is maybe the beginning of us seeing the end of, like, hardcore drink culture.
如果你看看现在有多少Z世代的人喝酒，其实很少。
If you've looked at how few of Gen Z now drink Yes.
我觉得可能只有20%。
It's, I think, maybe 20%.
有趣的是，关于原因的各种理论。
The interesting thing is, like, the the theories on why.
因为显然一定存在一些理论，对吧？只是我们其实并不完全清楚。
Because there's obviously there there have to be theories, right, on on we don't actually know exactly.
是的。
Yeah.
其中一个理论是，年轻人把喝酒看作是他们父母那一代人的行为。
One of them is that people the youth views drinking as, like, what their parents did.
对吧？
Right?
所以这就像是，嗯，那就是
So that's like, well, that's
自然很没意思。
Naturally uncool.
是的。
Yeah.
就像我那个无聊透顶的老爸还喝酒。
Like, my fucking lame ass dad drinks.
我不感兴趣。
Like, I don't I'm not interested.
所以这是一方面。
So that's one thing.
另一方面是，现在这些年轻人对饮酒的负面影响以及它可能对身体造成的伤害了解得非常多，所以他们就想，我为什么要，你知道的，我为什么要
The other part of it is that this group of people that are the youth right now are so much more informed on what the negative aspects of drinking and what it can do to you, that they're just like, why would I, you know, why would
我反对他们，
I object to them,
是的，反对这样的事情？
yeah, to to something like that?
而且他们发现，当你想放松一下时，现在有更多其他选择。
And that they've found this whole other you know, when you wanna take the edge off, there's a lot more options.
而且今天，像微量服用、食用大麻制品或吸烟这样的做法，比二十年前更被接受了。
And it's also a lot more accepted today than it was twenty years ago, like the idea that you could microdose or do edibles or smoke.
或者你知道，我的意思是？
Or you know I mean?
然后还有像氯胺酮之类的所有东西，哦，当我想要享受休闲时光时，我有各种不同的选择。
And then there's, like, all the, you know, ketamine and everything is like, oh, I have I have different things that I do when I want to have a recreational good time.
但不可否认的是，这种情况确实大幅减少了。
And But it's it's undeniable that it's it's definitely way down.
如今美国吸食大麻的日常使用者比饮酒的还多。
There's more daily users in The US of weed now than there are of alcohol.
这真的吗？
Is that for real?
被超越了。
Overtaken.
或者至少这是我最近看到的研究结果。
Or at least that was the the most recent study that I saw.
在美国，每日或近乎每日使用大麻的人数多于每日或近乎每日饮酒的人数。
In The US, there are more daily or near daily marijuana users than daily or near daily alcohol users.
而这种想法对你现在这个年龄段的青少年来说，完全难以理解，因为如果你是在八九十年代长大的，听到这种说法会觉得荒谬至极。
And that and that that thought was just completely like, if you're a a teen right now, you don't understand how preposterous that sounds coming from like, if you were growing up in the eighties and nineties.
那时候，你只会觉得那些人几乎是边缘群体。
Like, you were just like, those were like fringe people almost.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I mean?
我的意思是，虽然大麻很流行，但真正体面的人根本不会去碰，你知道吧？
Like, yes, it was popular, but it it was not like a respectable person really wasn't doing that, you know?
那时候就像艺术圈，像嬉皮士，是的。
It was like the arts, it was like hippies, and and, yeah.
我的意思是，人们觉得那是最糟糕的事情。
It was I mean, people thought of it as like the absolute worst thing that could happen.
我的父辈那一代人把大麻和海洛因等同起来。
I mean, people from like my dad's generation likened marijuana to heroin.
他们甚至看不出有什么区别。
They didn't even see like really a difference.
他们就觉得你是个瘾君子。
They're just like, you're a junkie.
但抽一支大麻烟又怎么了？
It's like, but what for smoking a joint?
他们就是这么看待这件事的。
And, like, yeah, that's the way they viewed it.
所以现在它被如此接受，这让我难以置信。
So the fact that it's that accepted now, it's it's mind blowing to me.
我在想，是不是因为一个人在家喝酒感觉特别糟糕。
I wonder if some of it is that drinking in the house on your own feels pretty fucking bad.
是的。
Yeah.
一个人在家抽烟，你会想，我只是在打《使命召唤》。
Smoking in the house on your own, you're like, I'm just watching I'm playing Call of Duty.
是的。
Yeah.
别管我。
Leave me alone.
但如果你已经喝了六瓶啤酒，然后打《使命召唤》，那就另当别论了。
But if you're if you're six beers deep playing Call of Duty Yeah.
那就不一样了。
It's a different story.
是的。
Yeah.
而且你那时候打得也不怎么样。
And you're and you're not playing well at that.
你就只是像
You're just like
我不知道吸了大麻的人打得怎么样，但操。
I don't know how well people are playing on weed either, but Fuck.
是的。
Yeah.
是的。
Yeah.
而且你更可能喊出一些贬义的脏话。
And you're probably more likely to yell out pejorative slurs.
是的。
Yeah.
我觉得我的意思是，你看，吸烟对你仍然不好。
I I think that I mean, look, smoke smoking is still not good for you.
所以，比如说，你可能但我们都发现，你知道的，还有其他摄入和消费的方式。
So, like, you're probably but but we've discovered that, you know, there's other ways to ingest and, like, consume.
而这正是我认为年轻人远离饮酒这一青年文化现象的一部分，他们就是无所谓。
And that's that's what I think is part of, like, this youth culture thing about staying away from drinking is they're like, whatever.
我会用滴剂，或者你知道的，我吃点软糖之类的，怎么方便怎么来。
I do droplets in this or I, you know, I I have my gummy or whatever, however they wanna consume.
但他们就是绝对不喝酒，老兄。
But they're just they're definitely not drinking, man.
他们不像以前的那一代人那样喝酒了。
They're not drinking like they like everybody else before them did.
我曾经长期经营夜总会，我们看到夜生活行业出现了明显的下滑。
I used to run nightclubs for ages, and one of the big downturns we've seen has been in nightlife industry.
我认为英国每周都在失去一家夜总会。
I think The UK's losing a nightclub a week.
不是说夜总会的数量是无限的。
Not like an unlimited number of nightclubs.
几乎每周都有一家关门。
It's like one is shutting down pretty much every single week.
我问了一个仍在行业里工作的朋友，他觉得为什么会这样。
And I asked a a friend who's still in the industry why he thought that was the case.
他说，是智能手机的问题，老兄。
He said, smartphones, man.
过去，你可以随心所欲地放纵。
Back in the day, you could be as loose as you wanted.
你可以那种粗鲁、放荡的样子。
You could sort of have that larry, louty Yeah.
至少在英国，那种饮酒的文化，但他们不想被拍下来？
Drinking spirit, at least in in Britain And they don't wanna be recorded?
当然。
Of course.
是的。
Yeah.
比如，如果你在2002年的一个夜总会里搞砸了，甚至当场失禁，第二天你还能否认这事。
Like, if you mess up and, like, shit yourself in the middle of a nightclub in 2002, it's a story that you can deny the next day.
是的。
Yeah.
六个月后，大多数人可能都已经忘了。
And then after six months, most people have probably forgotten.
是的。
Yeah.
而如果这事发生在2025年，那就会被永久记录在互联网上，人人都能翻出来，拿去制作梗图。
Whereas if that happens in 2025, that's now concretized on the Internet for everybody to know and bring back up and make memes out of for the rest of
我的意思是，你可以想象，八九十年代和两千年初的职业运动员们出去后，是如何彻底摧毁女性的希望和梦想的。
I mean, it's can imagine, like, how the pro athletes of the eighties and nineties and early two thousands would just go out and just just destroy just destroy a woman's hopes and dreams.
而现在，他们全都。
And then now they're all yeah.
大家都如履薄冰。
They're like everyone's On edge.
是的。
Yeah.
每个人都拿着手机。
Everyone's got a phone out.
就是啊。
It's just yeah.
不过，你有没有想过为什么？因为我还记得，为什么嘻哈音乐和跳舞整体上在欧洲比在这里更流行？
It's it's a totally different by the way, you ever think about why because I still remember that, like, why was house music and and dancing in general so much bigger in Europe than here?
这里的人从来不像那样，让我们
People here were never like, let's
去跳舞吧。
go dance.
我不确定。
I'm not sure.
我的意思是，为什么任何一种文化现象会在任何地方出现呢？
I mean, I guess, why does any scene of any kind appear anywhere?
在英国，我们确实有很好的浩室音乐文化。
We certainly have in The UK, like, good house music culture.
是的。
Yeah.
很多人没什么别的事可做，只能出去派对和喝酒。
A lot of people didn't have much else to do other than go out and party and drink.
是的。
Yeah.
如果天气不好，那我们就不会出去到牧场去。
If the weather's bad, then, you know, we're not gonna go out to the ranch.
我们也不会去True。
We're not going to go and True.
看日落。
See the sunset.
我们不会去海滩，因为那里总是冷得要命。
We're not gonna go to the beach because all of the it's fucking freezing cold all the time.
所以你就会专注于唯一可靠的东西——啤酒。
So you kind of just zero in on the one thing that's reliable, which is beer.
是的。
Yeah.
酒吧或俱乐部。
Pub or clubs.
是的。
Yeah.
对。
Yeah.
不。
No.
我只是记得，很多次在美國時，有歐洲朋友問我：你們為什麼不喜歡去跳舞？
I just remember, like, so many times, like, being in The States and having, like, European friends who are like, why don't you guys you guys don't like to go dance?
我当时想，天啊，才不是呢。
And I was like, man, no.
我们不去跳舞，兄弟。
We're not going dancing, bro.
就是，不去了。
Like like, no.
然后我会想起，留学的时候，心想，哦，对啊。
And and then I would remember, like, studying abroad and being like, oh, yeah.
我们那时候，那可是很平常的事。
We would that's that was, like, a normal thing.
就是去一个挤满人的地方，放着震耳欲聋的音乐，大家都在跳舞。
Just go to a place that was just, like, packed and everybody just loud music dancing.
那种情况就是，我觉得这在这儿根本行不通。
It just was one of those things where I was like, it just didn't translate over here.
我的意思是，
I mean,
当然还是有夜总会的，但那种纯粹想过去听歌、好好跳舞的感觉，就是完全不一样。
there were still clubs, obviously, but it just wasn't the same type of, oh, I just wanna go listen to this and literally dance.
我觉得，在欧洲，人们比在这里更常做这样的事。
Like, that's what people I felt like were doing a lot more in Europe than here.
我认为，每个人在每一刻都会做出这三个决定。
These are the three decisions that I think everyone makes every moment.
你现在就在做其中之一。
First, you're doing it right now.
你会专注于什么？
What are you gonna focus on?
你会专注于我正在讲给你的这个故事。
You're gonna be focusing on my story I'm telling you.
你会专注于你接下来要问的问题。
You're be focusing on the next question you're gonna ask.
你会专注于你肚子的感觉，如果你还没吃饭的话。
You're be focusing on how your stomach feels if you've not eaten.
实际上，你可以专注的事情有成千上万种。
There's a million things you could focus on, literally.
但我们并没有真正体验生活。
But we don't experience life.
我们体验的只是我们所关注的生活部分。
We experience the part of life we focus on.
所以关键在于，我知道我和我父亲有着不同的体验，因为我们关注的东西不同——我关注的是食物，你知道的，那些东西真棒。
And so the bottom line is, I know my father and I had a different experience because we had different focuses that I was focused on was food, know, what a con stuff, this is cool.
他关注的是自己没有照顾好家人。
He was focused on that he had not taken care of his family.
我知道这一点，是因为他低声说了大约二十次，而我母亲当然也附和了。
And I know that because, you know, he said it about 20 times under his breath and my mother echoed it of course.
但第二个决定是，一旦你关注某件事，你的大脑就必须判断它意味着什么。
The second decision though, the minute you focus on something, your brain has to decide what does it mean.
而意义正是产生情绪的原因。
And meaning is what creates emotion.
而情绪才是你生活的核心。
And emotion is where your life is.
对吧？
Right?
所以生活的质量就是你情绪的质量。
And so the quality of life is the quality of your emotions.
如果你有一十亿美元，但每天都很生气、愤怒，那你的生活品质就是生气和愤怒。
If you got a billion dollars and every day you're pissed off and angry, your life's quality is called pissed off and angry.
如果你有三个可爱的孩子，一个你深爱的丈夫或妻子，但你总是担心，那你的生活就是担忧。
If you got three beautiful children, a husband or wife you love but you worry all the time, your life is worry.
你知道吗？
You know?
所以他的关注点，以及他赋予的意义，这才是最糟糕的部分。
So his focus and then his meaning, that was the worst part.
他赋予它的意义是：自己毫无价值，不属于这里。
The meaning he gave it was that he was worthless and didn't belong here.
而这通常会引向第三个决定：你打算怎么做？
And that usually leads to the third decision which is what are you gonna do?
比如，当你遇到某件事时，你会认为这个人是在轻视我、不尊重我，还是在挑战我、指导我，或者是在爱我？
And like if you think if the meaning is if something happens, you say this person is dissing me, you know, disrespecting me or is this person challenging me or is this person coaching me or is this person loving me?
如果你觉得对方在轻视你，你的情绪反应会和你认为对方在指导你或爱你时截然不同。
If you think they're dissing you, you're gonna have a very different emotional reaction than if you think they're coaching you or loving you.
当然，这也会改变你所做的决定。
And then of course, that's gonna change what decision you make.
因为如果你生气了，你的决定会和你感到有趣或慷慨时完全不同。
Because if you're angry, you're gonna make a different decision than if you're playful or generous or whatever the case may be.
所以这三个决定掌控着我们的生活。
So those three decisions control our lives.
但我会给我的观众或听众一个机会去审视这一点，因为你可以发现一些简单的模式，从而彻底改变你的专注方式。
But so your viewers or listeners, I give them an opportunity to take a look at it because there's some patterns that you can make some simple patterns and change your whole life of focus.
所以第一个是，我想问你们两个问题。
So the first one is, and I'd ask you two questions for you.
第一，克里斯，你认为大多数人对这个问题的回答会是什么？第二个是，如果你准备好了，你的答案又是什么？
One, Chris, is what do you think most people's answer to this question is and the other is what's yours if you're ready ready to play?
好吧？
Alright?
这其实很简单。
For it's real simple.
我们都会关注自己拥有的东西，有时也会关注缺失的部分。
We all have a pattern of focusing on what we have and at times on what's missing.
你认为大多数人更多地关注自己拥有的东西，还是关注缺失的部分？
Which one do you think most people spend more time focusing on what they have or what's missing?
缺失的部分。
What's missing?
你更关注什么？
What do you focus more on?
缺失的部分。
What's missing?
是的。
Yes.
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关注缺失的东西并不是失败者才会有的特质。
It isn't something that comes the focus on what's missing is not something that comes with someone who is a failure.
它更多地出现在非常成功的人身上。
It comes very much with people who are very successful.
那么问题来了，如果你总是关注缺失的东西，你如何维持幸福呢？
And the question then becomes, if you're always focused on missing, how can you sustain happiness?
你一直处于一种匮乏的状态。
You're in a permanent place of lack.
没错。
That's correct.
所以匮乏感一直存在。
So scarcity is there.
你会有动力继续在成就的跑轮上奔跑，但你很难获得真正的满足感，而且这种满足也无法持久。
So you'll have drive, right, to keep staying on the hamster wheel of achievement, but you're not gonna see much fulfillment and not in a sustainable way.
这是不可能的。
It's impossible.
这跟你我都没有关系。
And it has nothing to do with you or me.
对吧？
Right?
这只不过是软件而已。
It's just software.
而我们有灵魂。
And we got a soul.
我们不是软件。
We're not software.
但你太常运行你的软件了，以至于开始以为你的思维就是你，而我的思维只是我用来使用的工具。
But you run your software so often, you start thinking your mind is you versus my mind is a tool that I'm gonna use.
或者，如果我不使用它，它就会反过来控制我。
Or if I don't use it, it's gonna use me.
所以大多数人都是这样做的。
So the majority of people do that.
顺便说一下，在新冠疫情期间，这个数字激增了，因为很多人失去了很多东西，他们一直专注于缺失的部分，而这只会带来痛苦。
And by the way, during COVID, that number exploded because so many things were taken from people, they were constantly focused on what's missing and that produces nothing but pain.
第二个问题，我想我知道你对这个问题的答案，你更倾向于关注哪一个？
Second question, and I think I know your answer to this one, which do you tend to focus on more?
你认为大多数人更关注哪一个？
What do you think most people focus on more?
是他们能控制的，还是他们不能控制的？
What they can control or what they can't control?
那你更关注哪一个呢？
And then which one do you focus more on?
我认为大多数人可能会更关注他们无法控制的事情。
I think most people would probably focus on what they can't control.
我的意思是，即使在这两者之间保持平衡。
I mean, even balance, I would say, between the two.
我正在努力地
I'm working quite hard to
尝试。
try.
我本来想说，你努力是作为‘是的’的一部分。
I was gonna say you strive as part of Yeah.
你的哲学，对吧，专注于你能控制的事情。
You know, your philosophy, right, to focus on what you can control.
对吧？
Right?
所以这是斯多葛哲学整体理念的一部分。
So that's part of the stoicism whole philosophy of stoicism.
对吧？
Right?
但大多数人，你说得对。
So but most people, you're absolutely right.
在我的研讨会上，情况不同，因为有一万五千到两万人问过这个问题，绝大多数人说他们关注的是失去的东西，但绝大多数人也说他们确实关注自己能控制的事情。
Now in my seminars, it's different because I got fifteen, twenty thousand people ask that question and the vast majority of them say they're focused on what's missing, but the vast majority of them say they do focus on what they can control.
这就是他们来的理由。
That's why they came.
嗯哼。
Mhmm.
他们为什么要花钱和花时间呢？
Why would they spend their money and time?
他们希望掌控自己的事业、身体、关系，或者别的什么方面。
They wanna take control of their business or their body or their relationship or the case may be.
所以他们的信念体系是不同的。
So they have a different belief structure.
如果你这两者都失调了，就会面临真正的挑战。
If you have both of those out of whack, you got some real challenges.
大多数人至少有一项是失调的，这就会造成压力。
Most people have at least one out of whack, which creates stress.
第三个方面，当然还有更多，但为了在家观看的朋友们，我快速说一下，如果他们愿意的话，可以自己试试。
Then the third one, and there's many more than these, but just quickly for the people at home, and I'm asking them to do this for themselves if they want to.
你通常更关注哪里？
Where do you tend to focus more?
你的过去、现在，还是未来？
Your past, your present, your future?
我们都会花时间在三个方面，但你更多的时间花在哪里？
We all spend all three, but where do you spend more of your time?
你觉得大多数人会关注哪里？
Where do you think most people do?
你呢？
Where do you?
假设从现在起，你只剩下10个锻炼动作来塑造你所能达到的最好身材。
Let's say that you only had 10 exercises for the rest of time to build the best body that you could.
你会选择哪几个？
What are you gonna choose?
是的。
Yeah.
我有一个
I've got a
给我讲讲你的理念。
Talk me through the philosophy.
我已经安排好了一套训练计划。
I've got a roster set up.
当涉及到腿部训练时，我认为一直做超级重的深蹲或腿举来练股四头肌并不适合我，因为我曾经有一段时间几乎只做腿伸展。
So when it when it comes to legs, I think that the idea of a crazy heavy squats or leg press all the time as a quad builder, it just wouldn't be it for me because I've had periods of time where I basically did a leg extension exclusively.
通常，当我减脂时，我的腿伸展训练量会增加，因为从收缩感和激活效果来看，如果你用电子脉冲设备测量，或许能真实反映出它们的激活程度。
Usually, when I diet, my leg extension volume increases because, I mean, squeezing wise, activation wise, you know, if you slap electronic pulse indicators, maybe you could get a real readout of how much they're activating.
但对我来说，如果必须选一个练股四头肌的动作，我会直接把腿伸展做到极致，因为你能很好地泵感，还能稍微加重一点。
But for me, like, if I had to take a quad movement, I would just kill it on the leg extensions because you can really pump them up, go a little heavier.
嗯。
Mhmm.
如果非得选一个，那就是它了。
Like, there's if I had to pick one, they'd be they that would be it.
好的。
Okay.
至于腘绳肌，我会有点纠结，但可能最终会选择坐姿或俯卧腿弯举。
Then hamstrings would be I'd be a little torn, but I'd probably just pick, I'm very torn, either seated or laying curl.
嗯。
Mhmm.
但不管怎样，都是腿弯举。
But either way, a hamstring curl.
你必须选一个。
You gotta pick one.
我担心，萨姆，你不能……
I'm I'm afraid, Sam, you can't
我想我得选俯卧的。
I guess I'd have to pick the I'd ask for to laying.
我会选更有拉伸感的。
I would have picked a little bit more stretch.
嗯，我之所以喜欢，不只是因为那个，因为在坐姿状态下
I well, I just like not even because of that, because you would actually in a seated position
如果你向前倾的话。
If you pull forward.
你的髋部会不会因此更圆润，从而让腘绳肌的附着点拉得更开？
Would your, you know, hips not be more rounded over where your hamstrings tie in?
所以现在它们实际上被拉得更开了。
So now they're actually more stretched.
就像你弯腰摸脚趾时能感受到腘绳肌的拉伸，而不是躺下的时候。
Like, you feel your hamstring stretch when you bend your torso to touch your toes, not when you're laying down.
所以，当人们说腿弯机拉伸更充分时，我根本看不出这一点。
So, like, the idea when people talk about there's more stretch on the lane curl, I don't I don't even see it.
这取决于你是不是这样坐着。
Well, that depends if you're sat like this.
因为通常会有把手。
Because often there's handles.
是的
Yeah.
人们会把自己撑起来。
People press themselves up.
是的
Yeah.
是的
Yeah.
是的
Yeah.
所以那样的话会是
So that would be
你把这推开了，是的。
You've pushed this off Yeah.
而不是把自己拉进来。
As opposed to pulling yourself in.
所以我想这取决于你如何调整自己的姿势。
So I guess it depends how you position yourself.
所以我想，但目前我正在专注于仰卧卷腿。
So I I guess but right now, I'm on a kick of laying curl.
好的。
Alright.
所以是股四头肌伸展和仰卧腿弯举。
So quad extension, lying hamstring curl.
嗯。
Mhmm.
对于背部训练，我可能就只是做常规的下拉动作。
And then for back, I'd probably just have to do regular pull downs.
但你也可以通过向后倾斜得更远来作弊式地完成划船动作。
But you could also cheat them into a row by leaning back extra far.
好的。
Alright.
好的。
Okay.
对。
Yeah.
这是可以接受的，因为你刚刚
That's that's that's acceptable because you've just
只有一台机器。
got the one machine.
是同一个把手。
It's the same handle.
是同样的设置。
It's the same setup.
好的。
Okay.
好吧。
Alright.
但是对于，嗯。
But for yeah.
就我而言，我需要更多的背阔肌，因为我想让它们更宽。
For me, anyway, I need more lats because I want them to be wider.
我的背部厚度其实已经不错了。
Like, the thickness of my back is actually fine.
我是希望它们能向外延伸。
Like, I want them to extend out.
这才是真正营造那种视觉效果的关键。
Like, that's what really gives that sort of look illusion.
关于高位下拉，你对握距和动作提示有什么看法？
What do you think about when it comes to lat pull down, hand position, cues?
你在想什么？
What are you thinking?
因为这样你可以大大改变动作方式。
Because then you you can change it up pretty drastically.
比如，如果我做一组轻重量的，这通常是在最后阶段，我会把双手放得更开一些，这样做的感觉更像是不上下耸动肩膀，而是更多地刺激到下背部的背阔肌，以及竖脊肌的中部厚度。
Like, if I do a lighter set, which is normally toward the end, I can put my hands extra far out, and it's a bit a little bit more like rather than pulling my shoulders up and down, which kinda gets, like, a lot of my lower lats, like, of erector, like, middle thickness.
相反，如果你双手放得更宽，并围绕肩膀旋转，这样能更多地刺激到上背部的背阔肌。
Rather, you know, having wider show hands and rotating around my shoulders, that gets me a little more upper lats.
但你也可以选择超重负荷，采用更窄的握距，这样会自然地更多锻炼到前臂和二头肌。
But or you could also make it super heavy and do a closer grip, and you get a little forearm and bicep just from the nature of it.
这更像是一个复合型的划船动作。
Like, that's more of a compound movement of a row.
是的。
Mhmm.
但这样你也能真正地加大负荷。
But then you can really load it too.
好的。
Okay.
所以，股四头肌伸展、俯卧腿弯举，再加上做高位下拉时对把手做一些小调整。
So quad extension, lying hamstring curl, lat pull down with a little bit of fuckery on the handle.
嗯。
Mhmm.
是为了什么？
What's for?
是的。
Yeah.
四个练胸肌，我想我得选，哦，我有点纠结。
Four for chest, I think I'd have to pick oh, I'm a little torn.
但老实说，如果只能选一个的话。
But honestly, if I had to only pick one.
不行。
No.
你可以的，你总共有十个动作，所以你可以
You can you've got 10 in total, so you can
但你能锻炼到很多肌群。
But you get a lot of muscle groups.
你至少得覆盖全面。
You gotta at least cover your bases.
好的。
Okay.
所以，我想曾经我会说，如果我在做上斜杠铃推举，我会选上斜杠铃。
So I would say there was a time when I would say inclined barbell if I was on an inclined barbell kick.
但这对肩膀有点棘手，因为动作非常直接地
But it it's a little tricky in your shoulders because of the it's very, like, directly
我从没感觉过被压住。
Never felt mounted.
我唯一感到肩膀有锻炼的时候，通常就是做上斜杠铃的时候。
Like, the only time I ever get my shoulders is usually inclined barbell.
我喜欢这个动作，但不会一直做。
When I like it, I like it, but I wouldn't do it all the time.
所以，我会说哑铃。
So that's where I would say dumbbell.
但即便如此，哑铃的限制也很大，因为你无法使用很重的重量，而且每个哑铃可以独立移动，即使在顶部你仍然需要收紧。
But even then, dumbbell is very limited because you can go really heavy and the individual loading and the fact that they can move out the entire way, you'd still squeeze at the top.
你可以在杠铃顶部靠在长凳上休息，因为所有的力量都通过你的骨骼结构传递。
You can rest a bench with a bar at the top because it's all just going through your bone structure.
哑铃就不行了。
Not so much with dumbbells.
所以。
So
这需要调整。
it's adjusting.
是的。
Yeah.
你永远不可能在哑铃的顶部完全放松。
You you oh, you're never gonna relax on the top of a dumbbell.
但我现在觉得我可能会选择坐姿绳索推举。
But what I think I'd have to pick now would actually be a, a seated cable press.
所以如果你见过这种座位
So if you've ever seen seat here
嗯
Mhmm.
缆绳在这里，缆绳在这里，你把它拉过来。
Cable here, cable here, you pull it in.
嗯
Mhmm.
你有点像这样。
You kinda like this.
好的。
Okay.
因为在整个过程中它都是中立的吗？
Because that is neutral throughout that?
相当中立。
Pretty neutral.
是的
Yeah.
对
Yeah.
所以你不被允许
So you're not you're not allowed
不要前倾，也不要后仰，稍微把手抬起来一点。
to Not incline, not decline, like, kind of hands up a little bit.
是的
Yeah.
因为这样是一个更通用的动作设置。
Because that's a much more versatile set.
因为我可以像传统推举一样做得很重，但也可以轻一点，更强调挤压感。
Because I can do it really heavy like a conventional press, but I I can also go lighter and be much more squeeze emphasized.
嗯
Mhmm.
因为这两个动作基本上覆盖了所有部位的每一个动作。
Because those are, the two bases I basically cover for every move every body part.
如果我做重的，我会用轻的、强调挤压的动作来平衡。
If I do a heavy one, I'm gonna counter it with a lighter squeezing one.
嗯。
Mhmm.
如果只做其中一个，我认为你会限制你的刺激效果。
And to do only one, I think you'd be limiting your stimulus.
所以这就把我们带开了。
So that that puts us away.
现在已经有四个了。
There's that's that's four now.
所以肯定有一个上斜哑铃卧推，我认为对每个男性来说，这始终是胸部训练的首选。
So there's definitely on incline dumbbell press, which I think for every guy is always gonna be up there for chest.
它对肩膀的感觉很好。
It feels good on your shoulders.
当你刚进健身房时，这总是你最先做的动作之一。
It's always one of the first movements that you do when you get into the gym.
你会觉得它在塑造你想要的胸部部位，就是这里。
You feel like it's building the bit of the chest that you want, which is up here.
嗯。
Mhmm.
但如果你做一组很轻的，你不会像用缆绳器械那样有同样的感觉。
But if you do a really light set, you just don't feel it same as you do with your own cable.
所以我理解这种张力，尤其是因为你被往那个方向拉，而不是这个方向。
So I understand that tension, especially because you're being pulled that way, not that way.
对吧？
Right?
所以你始终会感受到那种，你知道的，即使在顶部也存在的扩张力。
It's So you always have that kind of, you know, widening force even at the top.
是的。
Yeah.
这是个好观点。
That's a good point.
好的。
Alright.
所以一共有四个。
So there's four.
所以是伸展、弯举、下拉、缆绳推举。
So extension, curl, pull down, cable, press.
推举。
Press.
是的。
Yep.
这是在30度的倾斜角度上做吗？
Is that on an on a little incline, 30 degrees?
基本上就是平的。
Just just flattish.
好的。
Okay.
基本上是平躺负重。
Basically flat flat loaded.
好吧。
Alright.
因为这样你可以把手放高一点，更多锻炼上胸肌；放低一点，就能更多锻炼其他部位。
Because then you could also put your hands up a little and get more upper chest, put it down a little, get more.
你可真够调皮的。
You're being very cheeky.
好的。
Okay.
第五个。
Number five.
所以对于手臂来说，五和六分别是，先练三头肌。
So a five and six for arms would be, well, for triceps first.
我可能会选一个简单的直杠弯举和下压动作。
I'd I'd probably have to pick just a easy bar curl push down.
是的。
Mhmm.
不是V型杠。
So not the v bar.
对。
Like Mhmm.
90度太多了。
90 degrees is too much.
完全平直对腕关节压力也太大。
Straight is also a little too much on your wrists.
所以稍微带点弧度，像120度那样。
So a little camber, more like a one twenty.
是的。
Mhmm.
差不多就是这样。
That's about right.
嗯。
Mhmm.
因为我也能轻一点、注重收缩，或者真正发力，增加一些重量。
Because I can also do that light and squeezing, or you can really, like, get into it and have some heft.
你对这个动作的提示有什么想法？
What are you thinking about with cues for that?
如果你髋部稍微弯曲一点，身体会更直一些吗？
Are you more upright if you got a little bit of bend in the hips?
是的。
Yeah.
保持相当直立。
Decently upright.
但如果你站得太直，那就变成腹部训练了，因为你的手臂向下负重，你必须保持紧张才能维持姿势。
But if you're if you stand too upright, well, then now you're, like, turning into an ab exercise because you're loading your arms downward, and you have to keep yourself tense to stay there.
所以我会弯腰靠近它。
So I I I'll hunch over it.
嗯。
Mhmm.
或者当我做难度大的动作时，我会把头靠在缆绳一侧，像这样稍微用力扭动一下。
Or if I'm doing a hard one, I'll put my head to the side of the cable and kinda, like, wrench it a little like that.
不是所有动作都这样，但有些会。
Not for all of them, but for some of
对。
them.
嗯。
Mhmm.
好的。
Okay.
而哑铃就是单纯的哑铃弯举。
And then dumbbells is just dumbbell curls.
我想很难再超越了。
I guess it's hard to beat.
坐着、站着、掌心向上？
Seated, standing, supinated?
这算不同的动作吗？
Would it would it count as different movements?
是的。
Yes.
得选一个。
Gotta pick one.
哦，我想我得选站着的。
Oh, I guess I'd have to just pick standing.
站着，掌心向上？
Standing, supinated?
所以更像是一个经典的动作，从自然握姿转向掌心向上，同时带动你的髋部。
So more of a regular a classic twist of neutral at your, you know, your hips into supinating.
是的
Yeah.
对
Yeah.
好
Yeah.
明白
Yeah.
因为有些动作，改变负荷会完全改变动作的风格。
Because just the with some movements, being able to change the load completely changes the style of the movement.
我可以做三十次，用力保持并收紧，或者尝试做七十次，让它变成一种更重、更吃力的感觉。
Because I could do the thirties and really hold it and squeeze it, Or I could try to do, like, the seventies and have it be a much heavier kind of brunt sort of thing.
所以这样也没问题。
So that's alright.
我们快接近了
We're getting close
到更多。
to more.
现在，你还有四个。
Now, so you got four left.
是的。
Yeah.
所以现在是六个。
So six now.
我可以休息一下肩膀，因为我已经好几年没专门练过肩膀了，因为它们本来就够大了。
I can chill on shoulders cause I don't I haven't done a real shoulder workout for like years at this point because they're just they're already big.
比如，我的手臂才更需要增长。
Like they don't relative my arms need to grow.
所以我想加一个前臂弯举的缆绳动作。
So I'd I'd I would wanna add a a forearm curl cable.
好的。
Okay.
所以你拿着一个D形手柄，把缆绳拉到这里。
So you're holding the one d handle, you know, cable up here.
我把它往下拉。
I'm loading it down this way.
这就是力量的方向。
Like, this is the force.
好的。
K.
我就这么做。
And I'm just doing this.
好的。
Okay.
动作幅度并不大。
And it's not a huge movement.
是的。
Yep.
但这已经足够让你实际上把这里加厚一点。
But it's, like, enough where you actually kind of thicken this up.
嗯哼。
Mhmm.
我以前经常做很多这种动作。
And I used to do a ton of that.
后来我的前臂变得足够粗壮了，我就再也没做过。
Then And my forearms got big enough, and I never did it again.
至少你现在又回来了。
At least Now you're back
因为手臂已经跟上了。
on it because the arms have caught up.
现在我又加了一点。
Now I added a little more.
但确实如此。
But it's yeah.
说实话，我觉得这原本是个玩笑，说的是休·杰克曼或者史泰龙之类的人疯狂锻炼前臂。
And honestly, for just I think it was a joke that Hugh Jackman or someone or Stallone worked their forearms like crazy.
因为当你演戏时，虽然不总是裸露上身，但通常都是穿无袖装。
Because when you're acting, you're not always shirtless, but you're usually sleeveless.
拥有粗壮的前臂会让你看起来更酷。
And having big forearms makes you look extra cool.
嗯。
Mhmm.
所以，我想在那之后，我可能得加个坐姿提踵练习。
So, I guess after that, I'd probably have to add a calf raise
是因为站立和坐着的区别吗？
just because Standing seated?
坐着。
Seated.
坐姿效果更好一点。
Seated is a little bit better.
好的。
Okay.
尽管你可能会做错，我总是会把它们搞反。
Even though you're gonna be hitting I can always get these the wrong way around.
胃腓肠肌和比目鱼肌，随便吧。
Gastron versus soleus, whatever.
对我来说，我能感受到，我的小腿会因此变大。
For me, I feel it, and my calves will grow from it.
所以我有自己的一套经验，证明它确实有效。
So I've got my own anecdotal evidence of it worked.
好的。
Okay.
还剩两个。
Got two left.
下一个是要用有氧自行车，但没多少人会加这个。
So the next one has to the cardio bike, which not many people would add.
嗯。
Mhmm.
因为他们觉得，我不需要做有氧运动，因为这根本不在他们的考虑范围内。
Because they are thinking, I don't even need to do cardio because it's not on their mind.
但确实如此。
But that's, yeah.
所以是坐着的，然后踏板的位置在我脚这边。
So seated, and then the pedals are, like, where my feet are over here.
有点
It's kind of
倾斜的
a reclined
再往后一点。
little bit further back.
这是一种倾斜的姿势，也是最轻松的一种。
It's a reclined position, and it's the easiest one.
小靠背。
Little backrest.
我的躯干不会动。
My torso does not move.
所以我可以想踩多久就踩多久。
So I can pedal as much as I want.
我只是坐着，玩三十分钟手机。
I'm just sitting, playing with my phone for thirty minutes.
你可以做这个，而且让它变得很简单。
Like, you can do it and also make it easy.
你有偏好的机器吗？
Have you got a preferred machine for that?
比如，预核心设计让它特别好？
Like, the pre core make it particularly good?
有些机器上有小把手。
Just some of them, they have little handles.
有时候把手离膝盖太近了，你会撞到膝盖。
Sometimes the handles are too close to where your knees are, and you'll bump your knee on them.
这可是我唯一的抱怨。
That's that's my only gripe.
是的。
Mhmm.
但我并不挑剔。
But I'm not I'm not picky.
我家里那台机器，说白了就跟在路边白送的那种差不多，但它照样能用。
The one I have at my house is like I mean, it's the equivalent of one that you'd get for free if you picked it up from, like, this side of the road, but it it still works.
好的。
Okay.
而且，实际上，我那台机器显示的消耗热量更高，因为它们计算卡路里消耗的算法并不完全准确。比如，像我这样以某个难度和速度骑三十分钟，一个奥运选手或者专业自行车手如果以同样的速度和难度骑行，反而会消耗更少的卡路里，因为他们更高效。
And, actually, that one's harder on a, well, it reads harder because sometimes the math that they do to calculate calories burned, it it's not completely because if someone like me pedaled for thirty minutes at x difficulty at x speed, An Olympic cyclist or, like, a marathon cyclist could do it at the same speed and the same difficulty, and he would actually burn less calories because he's more efficient.
是的。
Mhmm.
而我效率更低。
And I'm less efficient.
所以并不总是要追求同样的数值。
So it's not necessarily always aim for the same number.
就是那种感觉，嗯，这有点难，但也不是太难。
It's like, know the feeling of, like, this is hard, but it's not too hard.
这就是合适的能量消耗水平。
Like, this is the right energy expenditure level.
我之前用过坡度跑步机走路来进入二区心率。
I did that on a I've been getting into incline treadmill walking to get to zone two.
对我来说，二区心率很难达到。
Zone two for me is really hard to hit.
这比在普通路上走路快多了，是的。
It's way faster than a normal walk on the road Yeah.
但又比慢跑慢得多。
And it's way slower than a jog.
而且
And
是的
Yeah.
我最喜欢的坡度是3.55%。
My incline preferred is, like, 3.55%.
对我来说是3.0，15的时候是3.2，是的。
Three point oh, for me, 3.2 at 15 Yeah.
感觉还不错，但我不清楚英国那台机器的具体指标。
Is is nice, but I don't know what the metrics are of the the whatever the machine is that was in The UK.
而且那是3.215。
And it was 3.215.
我当时就觉得，这感觉不对劲。
And I was like, this doesn't feel right.
好吧。
Okay.
我就继续加到4吧。
I'll just keep going up four.
像4这个数值还是感觉不对。
Like, four still doesn't feel right.
5呢？
Five?
这个数字到底是什么鬼？
What the fuck is this number?
它升到了5.3。
It got to 5.3.
我当时想，是
I'm like was
差不多是这个数。
about that.
速度不对。
Speed was off.
是的。
Yeah.
那是英里每小时还是
Is that miles per hour or
我不知道。
I don't know.
因为在这里不会是公里，因为还是英里每小时。
Because it wouldn't be kilometers over here because it would still be miles per hour.
不管它是什么，是的。
I whatever it was Yeah.
完全一样。
The exact same.
你可以去一台新机器，做完之后你甚至不需要那么多疗程。
You go, I can go to a new machine, and after you've done you don't even need that many sessions.
什么？
What?
二十到三十次疗程之前，我就能通过呼吸的感觉大致明白自己应该是什么感觉，心率应该在什么水平。
Twenty, thirty sessions before you go, I kind of understand how I'm supposed to feel and where my heart rate's supposed to be at, like, just by a sense of breathing.
好的。
Okay.
所以你还剩一次。
So you got one left.
那是什么
What's
剩的？
left?
是的。
Yeah.
还剩一次。
One left.
我们为什么还没做？
Why haven't we done?
我们还没让你练腹肌。
We haven't good you haven't touched abs.
你还没直接练臀部。
You haven't touched glutes directly.
你还没直接练肩膀。
You haven't touched shoulders directly.
还缺什么？
What else is missing?
我觉得就这些了。
I think that's it.
可能还有下背部，如果就这些的话。
Lower back, I guess, if that's all.
在健美领域，你不希望你的下背部练得太发达，嗯。
In a bodybuilding sphere, you don't you don't want your lower back developed enough Mhmm.
哪里
Where
它有点纹理感。
it's got, like, a little texture.
但如果练得太发达，就会破坏你的腰线。
But if it gets too big, it'll take away from your waist.
因为关键就在于制造出肩膀更宽、腰部更细的错觉。
Because the whole point is this illusion of wider shoulders and a smaller waist.
既然它们已经练出来了，我可能就不会专门练腹肌了，因为即使做哑铃弯举时，腹肌也会被间接锻炼到。
So now that they're already developed, I probably wouldn't I I don't hit my abs because they get worked, you know, kinda secondarily from my even doing dumbbell curls.
我在保持身体稳定。
I'm keeping myself stable.
一旦腹肌有了，而且你还在持续锻炼，它们就不会消失，因为每次照镜子，你都会主动绷紧它们。
Like, once they're there and you're actually still working out, they're not going anywhere because you're and then every time you look at yourself in the mirror, you're gonna flex them.
它们已经得到足够的锻炼来维持状态了。
Like, they get worked enough to be maintained.
所以这就是为什么腹肌训练这么少的原因。
So that's, like, that's why there's not a lot of ab workouts.
因为我以前练得很多，现在它们根本不会消失。
Because I did a lot before, and now they're just not gonna go anywhere.
肩膀也是同样的道理。
Like, same with shoulders.
所以我有点犹豫，但我实在想不出还有什么别的想做的。
So I'd have to I'm a little reluctant, but I can't think of anything else I'd wanna do.
我会选择内收肌机器，因为那是你夹紧双腿的动作。
I'd I'd pick the adductor machine because that's where you're squeezing your legs together.
好。
K.
为什么？
Why?
这会让大腿中部稍微变厚，因为这整个系统其实与膝盖下方的腘绳肌有关联，但关键是在正中央这个部位——如果你的内收肌完全没有发育，只是挺直腰背、双腿伸直坐着，你的双腿之间会有一个很大的缝隙。
Makes your legs a little thicker in the middle because that's it's this whole kind of, like, system of, like, kind of it tie in it ties in kind of below your knee, more hamstring, but it's this sort of just piece right in the center where if your adductors were completely undeveloped and you just sit up straight with your knee straight, you'd have a really big gap between your legs.
嗯。
Mhmm.
你觉得单靠伸展动作无法完全达到这个效果吗？
And you think you wouldn't be able to fully get that with the extension?
伸展动作只是锻炼股四头肌。
Well, the extension is just quad.
嗯。
Mhmm.
因为那是针对股四头肌的膝关节屈曲动作。
Because that's a quad like a knee flexion.
嗯。
Mhmm.
而这个动作是锻炼大腿内侧的，说实话，我甚至不知道该怎么称呼它。
And this is, like, leg well, you know, I don't even know what you call it.
就是这个。
That.
是的。
Yeah.
就是这个。
That.
是的。
Yeah.
对。
Yeah.
笑话是，嗯，我不知道。
The joke is the well, it's I don't know.
这个笑话有两个版本，因为他们会把那个叫做‘压碎球’，因为当你夹紧双腿时就是那样。
There's, like, two versions of a joke because they'll call that one the ball crusher because that's what you that's when you're squeezing legs together.
但更早以前，人们常说的笑话是‘好女孩’或‘坏女孩’机器。
But the older, like, the joke that people would say before was that was either the good girl or the bad girl machine.
啊，一个是往外掰，一个是往里夹。
Ah, one's forcing it apart, one's forcing it together.
是的。
Yeah.
是的
Yeah.
好的
Okay.
所以我不想去延续那个名字，但那确实是在指那些东西。
So I I don't wanna don't wanna I perpetuate that name, but that was that's kind of a reference to to those.
好的。
Okay.
非常好。
Very good.
本集由Shopify赞助播出。
This episode is brought to you by Shopify.
看。
Look.
2026年将是你们终于启动那个酝酿已久的事业的一年，因为正如我反复强调的，列个待办清单并不等于真正去做这件事。
2026 is the year that you're finally going to launch that business you've been thinking about for ages because, as you've heard me harp on about, making a to do list for the thing isn't doing the thing.
告诉别人你打算做这件事，依然不等于在做这件事，但好消息是。
Telling people you're gonna do the thing still isn't doing the thing, but here's the good news.
Shopify 让你真正把这件事做起来变得难以置信地简单。
Shopify makes it unbelievably easy to actually do the thing.
他们让你非常轻松地创建品牌、开业并完成第一笔销售。
They make it very simple to create your brand, open for business, and get your first sale.
他们提供了数千个可自定义的模板，你只需要拖放即可。
They've got thousands of customizable templates, so all you need to do is drag and drop.
你不需要任何编程或设计技能。
You don't need coding skills or design skills.
你可以通过一个简单的仪表板管理物流、税费和支付等所有事项。
You can manage things like shipping, taxes, payments, all from one simple dashboard.
在将浏览者转化为买家方面，他们的表现堪称行业最佳。
And when it comes to converting browsers into buyers, they are best in class.
与其它领先的电商平台相比，他们的结账流程平均表现高出36%。
Their checkout is 36% better on average compared to other leading commerce platforms.
通过 Shop Pay，你可以将转化率提升高达 50%。
And with Shop Pay, you can boost conversions up to 50%.
Shopify 将经营业务的所有繁琐事务都替你承担，让你能专注于你来到这里真正要做的事——设计并销售一款出色的产品。
Shopify takes all of the messiness of running a business off your plate so that you can focus on the job that you came here to do, which is designing and selling an awesome product.
现在，你可以通过点击下方描述中的链接，或访问 shopify.com/modernwisdom（全部小写）注册每月仅需 1 美元的试用期。
And right now, you can sign up for a $1 per month trial period by going to the link in the description below or heading to shopify.com/modernwisdom, all lowercase.
访问 shopify.com/modernwisdom，今天就开始销售吧。
That's shopify.com/modernwisdom to start selling today.
你所能培养的最了不起的技能，就是在没有任何值得开心的事情发生时，依然保持良好的情绪。
The single greatest skill you can develop is the ability to stay in a good mood in the absence of things to be in a good mood about.
我觉得这条推文一直是我 2025 年的主题。
I think that tweet has been my theme for 2025.
这挺有趣的，因为这是我迄今为止被分享最多的推文。
It's been it's it's funny because that was the most shared tweet I've ever had.
而且它几乎总是和伊朗恰恰相反。
And it was it was like it's always almost not the opposite of Iran.
这很贴切。
It was fitting.
对吧？
Right?
这完全符合这一年的状况。
It was completely fitting for the year.
而且今年，我经历了一系列不幸的事件，这些事真的考验了我的应对方法。
And it's been because like this year, I've had a just I would say a series of unfortunate events that has occurred and it's really tested my tools.
对吧？
Right?
那些用来重新定义现实的工具，让我能让自己没那么痛苦。
Tools in the tool belt for reframing reality so that I can make my experience less, you know, miserable.
于是我思考了这个问题。
And so I thought about that.
如果把所有你能学到的技能都浓缩成最核心的一项，而我们所做的一切最终都会过时，那么你能培养的最重要技能，就是在没有任何理由开心的时候，依然保持好心情。
It's like if I were if I were to boil everything down, of all the skills that you can learn, if everything that we do eventually becomes irrelevant, then the single greatest skill that you can develop is being in a great mood in the absence of things to be in a great mood about.
所以另一个视角是，大多数人不会质疑一个情绪低落的人。
And so one of the other frames on this is most people don't question someone who's in a bad mood.
我只是情绪不好。
I'm just in a bad mood.
所以，如果你能毫无理由地情绪低落，那还不如毫无理由地保持好心情，因为至少好心情对你有益。
So it's like, well, if you can be in a bad mood for no reason, it's like you might as well be in a good mood for no reason because that one at least serves you.
因此，我一直在尝试练习，因为一方面，我们可以数一数值得感恩的事情。
And so I've been trying to exercise because there's on one degree, there's like, let's count things to be grateful for.
另一方面，为什么我必须有值得感恩的事，才能拥有好心情呢？
On the other side, it's like, why do I have to have things to be grateful for in order to be in a good mood?
为什么寻找值得感恩的事，成了拥有好心情的前提？
Like, why is trying to find things a requirement of being in that mood?
难道我不能在没有找到任何理由的情况下，依然选择保持好心情吗？
Like, can I not find things and still choose to be in a good mood?
因为我明明没有理由情绪低落，却还是情绪低落过。
Because I've certainly not had things to be in a bad mood about and been in a bad mood.
是的。
Mhmm.
所以我一直在努力锻炼这一点，也就是，当然，我们可以找到值得感恩的事情。
And so I've been trying to flex that, which is like, sure, we can find things to be grateful for.
当这些事情出现时，是的，而且当然，这是一种练习。
When those things pop up, yes, and of course, a, you know, it's a practice.
你会越来越熟练。
You get better at it.
但要是我能直接保持好心情呢？
But like, what if I could just be in a good mood?
所以我一直试图打破这两者之间的关联，因为那样会让好心情依赖于我能找到的东西。
And so I've just tried to try to break that that relationship between the two because then it makes it contingent on something that I can find.
你在这方面成功了多少？
How successful have you been at
呢？
that?
一般。
Mediocre.
嗯，听上去是个很棒的想法，是的。
Well, look, I think it's a it's a a lovely idea Yeah.
单独来看，当然。
In isolation Sure.
理论上是这样，但我对它在实际中的效果持怀疑态度，因为人类天生具有负面偏见。
In theory, but I'm not convinced about how effective it is in practice for the reason that humans have a negativity bias.
你知道，这完全是我们的心理熵。
You know, it's our psychological entropy 100%.
你察觉潜在风险的能力，远胜于察觉纯粹愉悦事物的能力。
And your ability to detect things that are a risk to you significantly better than your ability to detect things that are just pleasant.
比如今天早上，我给你发了条消息，说：嘿，老兄。
Like, this morning, I texted you, and I was like, hey, man.
我真的喜欢在我们录播客之前，早晨那种期待的感觉。
Like, I really love the feeling I have of anticipation on a morning before we do a podcast.
这对我来说是一种正常、无聊、平凡的快乐来源。
That's a normal, boring, mundane source of pleasure to me.
是的。
Yeah.
如果我不认真训练自己去留意这一点
If I'm not really, really training myself to notice that
是的。
Yeah.
我只是会因为一个事实而完全忽略它，比如我点了杏仁奶，但我觉得用全脂牛奶可能会更好。
I just it just fucking falls away with the fact that, I asked for almond milk and I bet this would have been better with, like, whole milk.
如果这就是让你一整天心情变糟的事情的话。
If that's the thing that ring that ruins the day.
但关键是，你确实注意到了。
And the thing is is you do notice it though.
对吧？
Right?
你确实注意到了。
You do notice that.
所以今年我有一个主题，就是关注那些时刻，无论是积极的还是消极的。
So I've had one of my themes this year has been focusing on moments and on both the positive and the negative.
所以当我们回想起过去，如果我回想去年，对吧？
And so like when we think back on if I think back on last year, right?
我大概不记得全年95%的事情。
I don't remember probably 95% of the year.
就像，你知道的，我做的都是同样的事情。
Like I, you know, I did the same things.
所以那些事情根本没被记录下来。
And so it's like, just didn't get recorded.
没什么特别的事情发生。
Like nothing notable happened.
因此，当我们思考一年的时候，实际上只记得少数几个时刻，仅此而已。
And so really like when we think about a year, we really just recall a handful of moments and that's it.
这些时刻通常都非常短暂。
And those moments in time are usually very short.
所以我一直在思考那些糟糕的时期，也许那并不是一个糟糕的时期。
And so I've been trying to think about the bad you know, seasons as well, maybe it wasn't a bad season.
也许我只是经历了五天糟糕的日子，或者五个糟糕的瞬间，然后我整个季度都在回想它们，把原本只有五分钟乘以五的时间，变成了一个完全糟糕的一年。
Maybe I had five bad days or really five bad moments that I then thought about for the entire season and turned what would have otherwise been five minutes times five into an entirely bad year.
所以问题是，我们可以在负面情况下这么做，那在正面情况下能不能也这么做呢？
And so it's like, okay, well, we can do that in the negative, can we do in the positive?
这显然是值得练习的事情。
Which is, you know, obviously the thing to to exercise.
但正如你之前提到的，我们识别威胁和风险的能力，远优于识别好事的能力。
But to the point that you said earlier about our our ability to detect threat and risk at such a such better accuracy than our ability to detect good things.
这非常有趣，因为如果你利用大脑的这一部分——当然，这不是要跑题——我觉得这在商业中极大地帮助了我。
It's so interesting because if you use that side of your brain, not to derail us, but like I think that has been one of the things that's helped me a tremendous amount in business.
因为当我思考一个企业并希望它成长时，我会想：有哪些事情可能毁掉这个企业？
Because when I think about a business and I want to grow it, for example, I would think, okay, what are all the things that can destroy this business?
这是查理·芒格。
And this is Charlie Munger.
这可不是我说的。
This isn't me.
但他基本说的是：逆向思考，永远逆向思考。
But basically, he says, invert, always invert.
爱因斯坦也这么说过。
And Einstein said that too.
因为这样你可以利用一种更强大的思维引擎，比如：我如何让我的企业成长？
And it's because like you get to use this this way stronger horsepower engine of like, how do I grow my business?
你当然可以这样想。
That's You could obviously think that way.
但另一种方式是：我如何用最少的步骤彻底摧毁这家企业？
But the alternative would be like, how would I absolutely destroy this business in the fewest possible moves?
当你列出这些步骤后，你会觉得：太棒了。
And then when you list out those moves, you're like, cool.
现在我们来做相反的事情。
Now let's do the opposite of that.
事实上，我许多最伟大的创意时刻都源于这些看似显而易见、却可能毁掉我们的想法。
And that has been Honestly, a lot of the Some of the sources of my greatest kind of creative moments have come from these apparently obvious things that would kill us.
如果我们做更显而易见的事——做那些不会毁掉我们的事情，会怎样？
Well, what if we did the even more obvious thing and did the the opposite of what would destroy us?
这确实奏效了，效果甚至好过我应得的。
And it's worked it's worked better than I deserve.
所以这是一个问题。
So this is a problem.
是的。
Yeah.
你在职业上可能会因此得到回报
You can be rewarded professionally
是的。
Yeah.
专注于那些你不想专注的个人事情上。
For focusing on things that you do not want to focus on personally.
瑞安·朗教过我这一点。
And Ryan Long taught me this.
他谈到自己是一名加拿大喜剧演员，非常有趣。
He was talking about how he's he's a comedian, Canadian comedian, really funny guy.
他花大量时间打磨这些段子， obsessively 地琢磨如何让它变得更好。
Spends all of this time, you know, dialing in these bits and obsessing over how it could be better.
然后他对自己说，是的，但你在人际关系中可不能这样。
And then he says to himself, yeah, but I don't want you do that in your relationships.
不行。
No.
当你面对伴侣、朋友，或你的身材形象时，你能放下这种心态吗？
Can you let that go when it comes to the way that you show up for your partner or your friends or your body image or whatever?
我的意思是，你不能把这种事割裂开来处理。
I mean, you don't get to compartmentalize stuff like that.
而这个世界有一个非常不幸的讽刺：你通常需要具备的那些商业成功所需的技能，恰恰是你在生活中获得幸福时需要摒弃的。
And it is a very unfortunate irony of the world that the skill set you often need to become successful in business Yeah.
正是你需要摆脱的技能。
Is the one you need to get rid of to be happy in your life.
是的。
Yes.
所以我一直在思考你之前提到的关于风险以及我们识别风险能力的问题。
So I was I was thinking about what you were saying earlier with regards to risk and our ability to detect it.
另一个有趣的部分是，我们不仅更容易察觉到威胁，还往往过度放大这些威胁可能带来的灾难性后果。
So the other part of that that's been really interesting is we also Not only do we detect more threats, we also overemphasize how catastrophic they could be.
与此相反的是，我们很少能识别出潜在的机遇。
And the converse of that is we rarely identify the upside.
即使识别出来了，我们也通常会低估这些机遇的价值。
And when we do, we typically underestimate the upside.
我认为这一点是很多人很少谈论的。
And I think this is something that a lot of people don't talk about as much.
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