#1077 - 克里斯·贝利 - 为什么有些目标感觉毫不费力（而另一些却令人痛苦）

对吧？

Right?

所以，具体的、可衡量的目标不也是具体的吗？

So aren't specific aren't measurable goals also specific, for example?

我研究了这项研究的来源，发现SMART目标最初是一篇发表在管理评论上的文章。

And I looked into the research on where did this actually come from, and it came from SMART goals originated as an article in a management review.

它并不是发表在学术期刊上的。

It wasn't an academic journal.

它只是有人写的一篇文章，讲如何更好地管理员工，而且它最初的意思和现在的缩写含义并不相同。

It was just kind of an article somebody wrote on how to better manage your employees, and it didn't stand for what the current acronym does today.

所以这就像一万步规则或一万小时规则，这些听起来似乎很合理的东西，因此自它们被提出以来，就因为文化中的‘传话游戏’而被不断扭曲和传播。

And so it's kind of like the, you know, the 10,000 step rule or the ten thousand hour rule, these nice kind of things that sound like they should work, and so there's a virality that's associated with it that, you know, kind of gets morphed in a a cultural game of telephone ever since they were introduced.

这实际上让我非常惊讶，因为这些目标听起来太好了，我记得当我发现这项研究时，还在书里写过相关内容。

And so I would this was actually quite a big surprise for me because these sound so good, and I remember, you know, encountering this research, writing about it in the book.

我其实已经草拟了一个关于SMART目标的章节，但我想了想，算了。

I I actually had a little bit of a chapter drafted about SMART goals, and so I but I thought, okay.

我需要一些研究依据来支持这一点。

I need some research backing here.

你知道吗？我深入研究了相关文献，发现许多研究者认为，围绕SMART目标存在大量研究浪费，因为这些目标看起来似乎值得研究。

You know, did did a deep dive into the research and found that there's, you know, a lot of researchers say that there's even research waste that occurs around SMART goals because it seems like they make sense to study.

太多企业都在使用它们。

So many businesses do them.

我迫不及待想踏上演讲巡回，向每一个

I can't wait to hit the the speaking circuit for this book and and tell every

企业毁掉所有人。

business Ruin everyone.

是的。

Yeah.

没错。

Exactly.

真的就是想在这些公司里引发一些争议。

Really just, you know, cause controversy within all these companies and stuff.

生产力方面的争议可能是你所能想象到的最无关紧要、最低风险的争议。

Productivity controversies are probably the lowest stakes and least important controversy you can ever imagine.

我知道现在有些政治议题看起来也同样愚蠢，但确实如此。

I know there's some political ones at the moment that seem equally stupid, but yeah.

是的。

Yeah.

是的。

Yeah.

愚蠢的争议到处都是，多得数不清。

There's stupid controversy and enough of it to go around it.

在这个充满愤怒、由算法驱动的世界里，任何时候都充斥着各种无谓的争议，但说到SMART目标，也许我们确实需要一些东西，因为这样我们才能设定真正更好的目标，这些目标不仅根植于我们的价值观，而且我们还能随着时间调整目标，使其更契合我们的价值观，同时也能克服许多阻碍我们实现目标的因素，比如与我们所处社会环境的不一致，还有拖延——这是另一个严重影响我们日常和人生成就的巨大障碍。

At any given time in this kind of outraged driven algorithmic world that we're in, but yeah, SMART goals, maybe we should have something because then we could set actually better goals that are rooted in not only our values, right, we can edit our goals over time so that they're better fit for our values, we can actually overcome a lot of the things that are getting in the way of our goals too, like a lack of alignment with the social environments we're a part of, like procrastination, which is another huge, huge inhibitor to just how much we're able to accomplish in in our day, in our life.

是的。

Yeah.

我们来谈谈拖延吧。

Let's talk about let's talk about procrastination.

比如，得假设拖延对很多人来说都是个问题。

Like, have to assume procrastination gets in the way for lots of people that there's a thing.

他们明白自己的意图。

They understand their intention.

这意图并没有溜走。

It hasn't got slippery.

它也没有从他们的脑海中消失。

It hasn't dropped out of their mind.

但不知为什么，为了实现这个意图而需要做的事情，他们就是没法开始，或者总是中途停下什么的。

And for some reason, the thing that they need to do in order to move themselves toward achieving the intention, for some reason, they can't can't get started or they keep on stopping or something.

那你学到了什么？

So what did you learn?

拖延，从大方向上看。

Procrastination, big picture.

是的。

Yeah.

所以从宏观角度看，非常宏观的角度。

So big picture, very big picture.

对于任何目标，我们都有一个欲望功能，要么是渴望去做它，这通常实际上与我们的价值观一致。

There are for any goal, we have this function of desire where we either desire doing it, which is usually aligned with our values actually.

因此，某件事与我们的价值观越一致，就越能激发我们的动机，我应该说，这是我们独特的动机本质。

So the more aligned something is with what we value, that's our motivational nature, our unique motivational nature I should say.

所以这就是欲望部分，价值观部分。

And so that's the desire component, the values component.

但还存在厌恶成分，要衡量你真正关心或想做某事的程度，你需要从欲望的量中减去你对做这件事的厌恶程度，有时我们会陷入负值状态。

But then there's the aversion component where to get how much you actually care about something or wanna do something, you have to subtract how much aversion you have to doing it from the amount of desire, and sometimes we end up in the negative.

因此，有很多目标我们并不想坚持下去。

And so there's a lot of goals that we don't wanna follow through with.

围绕这些目标存在着负面的能量，所以我们把它们一再推迟到以后。

There's a negative amount of energy around that goal, and so we punt it down the street for a later day.

这就叫拖延。

It's called procrastination.

但关于拖延症有趣的是，它纯粹是一种对不想做之事的本能和情绪反应。

But the the interesting thing about procrastination is it's a purely visceral and emotional reaction to something that we don't wanna do.

这其中几乎没有任何逻辑成分。

There's very little logic embedded within it whatsoever.

所以，事实证明，某些任务会带有特定的触发因素，这些因素会增加我们的反感，从而导致拖延。

So, you know, it turns out that there are certain triggers that a task can have that lead us to a greater amount of aversion, which leads to procrastination.

比如，某件事是否无聊。

So those are whether something is boring.

一件事越无聊，我们就越不想去做。

The more boring something is, the less we wanna do it.

挫败感是另一个因素。

Frustration is another one.

做某件事的过程非常令人沮丧。

So the process of doing something is very frustrating.

不愉快，对吧？

Unpleasantness, right?

这只是做起来不愉快的事情。

It's just something that's just not pleasant to do.

当某件事在遥远的未来时，越遥远的事情，我们越不想做，因为我们能为自己找借口。

When something's far away in the future, right, the further away something is, the less we desire to do it because we can justify to ourselves.

我们感觉不到即将来临的截止日期带来的压力。

We don't feel, you know, the impending deadline of having to do it.

当事情缺乏结构时，这也是拖延的另一个诱因。

When something is unstructured as well, that's another trigger of procrastination.

关于这一点，有趣的是，它让我有点沮丧，因为你可以为事情制定结构。

And the interesting thing about that is that one kind of frustrates me because you can structure things.

如果你因为这个原因感到抵触，比如因为没有健身计划就不想去健身房，这是很容易解决的，对吧？

If you feel aversion for that reason, if you don't wanna go to the gym because you have no workout plan or something, that's very solvable, right?

其他的那些则更糟糕、更混乱。

The other ones are kind of uglier, they're messier.

请再从头给我讲一遍这个列表。

Take me through the list from the top again.

是的，无聊、令人沮丧、不愉快、未来遥远、没有结构，最后一个是毫无意义的。

Yes, so boring, frustrating, unpleasant, far away in the future, unstructured, and the final one is meaningless.

所以它与我们的价值观不一致，这一点我们之前已经讨论过。

So it's not aligned with our values, which we've which we've covered.

好的。

Okay.

对人们来说，最简单的解决方案是什么？

What are the easiest solutions for people?

对。

Yeah.

那些感觉有点重复，比如无聊、令人沮丧，对吧。

Does it some of those feel a little redundant, like boring, frustrating Yeah.

毫无意义。

Meaningless.

我觉得我不明白为什么我们要在这里玩文字游戏，但它们看起来有点相似。

They feel I don't know why we're playing semantic games here, but they seem a little similar.

八二法则？

The eighty twenty?

人们克服拖延的八二法则是怎样的？

What's the eighty twenty of people overcoming procrastination?

是

Is

某种无结构的东西吗？

something unstructured?

给它结构化。

Structure it.

你知道，这是克服拖延最简单的办法。

You know, that's the lowest hanging fruit for procrastination.

而且通常当你交叉比对时，你会发现，没错，确实有重叠。

And usually you'll find when you cross reference, and you're right, there is overlap.

在研究中，关于这些是否是任务的不同特征，还存在一些争议。

You know, there is some debate in the research on whether these are distinct characteristics of tasks.

但一般来说，你会发现，当某件事令人反感时，往往会触发多个因素，对吧？

But generally, you know, you can kind of, because you'll find that when something's aversive, it sets off multiple ones, right?

你不想报税，因为它们很无聊、没有结构、令人沮丧、不愉快，所以你会拖延，也许你会把它们一拖再拖，放到以后再说。

You don't want to do your taxes because they're boring, they're unstructured, they're frustrating, they're unpleasant, and so you procrastinate, and maybe they're, you know, you kick them down the street for a later day.

但给事情加上结构是解决拖延问题最简单的方法之一，那你要怎么给报税这件事增加结构呢？

But structuring things is some of the lowest hanging fruit you can do for so how could you add structure to doing your taxes?

你能不能直接请人帮你做呢？

Can you just hire somebody to do it, right?

当某件事可以委托出去时，委托就是克服拖延最容易的方式。

Delegating something is the easiest way to overcoming procrastination on it when it's something that's delegatable.

所以，增加结构，然后回到目标调整上。

So add structure and go back to goal editing.

对吧？

Right?

如果你有一个目标让你非常反感，但它仍然在你的清单上，而你确实能看到完成它后带来的切实回报，对吧？

If you have a goal that's really aversive for you, but it's still on your list and you really see the tangible payoff of having done it, right?

不是做这件事的过程，也不是做这件事的乐趣，而是完成它之后带来的切实回报。

Not of doing it, not the enjoyment of doing it, but the tangible payoff of having done it.

调整目标，使其更符合你的价值观，对吧？

Edit the goal so it's more in line with your values, right?

把‘在夏季前练出六块腹肌’这种目标，转变为‘希望在退休时能安心，不用担心心脏会出问题’这样的目标，对吧？

Turn the goal from that six pack abs by beat season face goal into that goal of, you know, having a feeling secure in your body that your heart isn't going to attack you in retirement or something, right?

与背后更深层的意义建立联系，并与你最重要的两个价值观建立联系，例如。

Connect with the deeper meaning behind it and connect with your top two values, for example.

但同时，也要尽可能让这个过程对你来说真正变得愉快。

But also, do what you can to make it an actual enjoyable process for you.

这又回到了目标缺乏结构这一特点，其中

And this goes back to the unstructured nature of a goal where

但可能也不太愉快，对吧。

But also unpleasant, presumably.

是的，也不愉快，也很无聊，令人沮丧，这些因素往往同时存在。

Yeah, also unpleasant, also boring, you know, frustrating, you know, a few of these different things at once.

你能不能用一杯精致的拿铁来代替它？

Can you do it over, I don't know, a fancy latte?

你能不能列一个抗拒事项清单？

Can you do, can you, you know, have a resistance list?

这是我最喜欢的生产力策略之一，就是列出所有你抗拒去做的事情，然后设定一组奖励，当你完成这些事时就可以犒赏自己，对吧？

This is one of my favorite productivity strategies where, you know, make a list of everything you're resisting doing, and then a set of rewards that you can treat yourself when you do those things, right?

也许可以给每件事分配一些积分，用来兑换那些奖励。

Maybe assign a number of points that you can redeem for those rewards or something.

我在书里称它们为习惯积分。

I call them habit points in the book.

所以，你知道，有办法让这个过程更有趣，把一件你不想做的事变成一场游戏。

So, you know, there are ways of making the process more enjoyable, making a game out of something that you don't wanna be doing.

提高享受程度，比如喝一杯红酒，或者你正在喝的那杯色彩缤纷的饮料，然后把它留到那个时间段再享用。

So upping that enjoyment level, you pos Having a glass of wine or whatever that colorful drink is that you're having while you're And saving it for that period of time.

习惯叠加，对吧？就是当你做那些你不喜欢的事情时，同时培养一些你内心觉得有点罪恶的愉悦习惯。

Habit stacking, right, where you invest in the habits that you are kind of like guilty pleasures almost on some level, investing in those when you do the averse of things.

但有很多不同的方式可以帮助我们克服对各种事情的抗拒心理。

But there's so many different, you know, overcoming the resistance level we have to things, that that we can do.

在继续之前，我非常支持减少酒精摄入，但历史上，无酒精啤酒的味道简直像屎。

Before we continue, I am a massive fan of reducing your alcohol intake, but historically, nonalcoholic brews taste like ass.

你不需要进行什么大规模的戒断调整。

You don't need to be doing some big reset.

也许你只是想喝一瓶冰镇啤酒，却不想第二天早上感觉糟透了，这正是我如此推崇Athletic Brewing Co的原因。

Maybe you just want to crack a cold one without feeling like garbage the next morning, which is why I am such a huge fan of Athletic Brewing Co.

他们有50多种无酒精饮品，包括IPA、金色啤酒，甚至还有像鸡尾酒风格的帕洛玛和莫斯科骡子这样的限量款。

They've got 50 types of NAs, including IPAs, Goldens, and even limited releases like a cocktail inspired Paloma and Moscow Mule.

关键是这一点。

And here's the thing.

你可以随时随地喝。

You can drink them anytime.

无论是深夜、清晨、看比赛还是运动，都没关系。

Late nights, early mornings, watching sports, playing sports, doesn't matter.

没有宿醉。

No hangover.

没有妥协。

No compromise.

这就是我与他们合作的原因。

And that is why I partnered with them.

你可以在附近的杂货店或酒类商店找到 Athletic Brewing Co 最畅销的产品系列，或者更好的选择是订购包含四种口味的完整组合装，直接送货上门。

You can find Athletic Brewing Co's best selling lineup at grocery or liquor stores near you, or best option, get a full variety pack of four flavors shipped right to your door.

现在，通过访问下方描述中的链接或前往 athleticbrewing.com/modernwisdom，你可以享受首次在线订购15%的折扣。

Right now, you can get 15% off your first online order by going to the link in the description below or heading to athleticbrewing.com/modernwisdom.

网址是 athleticbrewing.com/modernwisdom。

That's athleticbrewing.com/modernwisdom.

至于那些你明知会很艰难、必须直面却无计可施的事情呢？

What about the I get I'm thinking about stuff that's just going to be tough that you're just sort of facing, and there's not really anything.

牺牲与回报的关系，这是无法回避的，而且只会让人难受。

The sacrifice reward dynamic, there's no way around this, and it's just going to suck.

我想你可以尝试一边听你喜爱的优质音乐来缓解一下。

I guess you could try and stack listening to good music that you enjoy at the same time.

你可以去咖啡店，让这件事变得轻松一点。

You could go to the coffee shop to try and make it a little bit easier.

我只是想知道，人们通常会多少次这样做到底对不对。

I'm just wondering how people how many times does someone right.

我正放着我最爱的歌。

I've got my favorite song on.

我去了我最爱的咖啡店，点了杯拿铁，然后操。

I've gone to my favorite coffee shop, my latte, and fuck.

我打开了Instagram。

I opened Instagram.

该死。

Shit.

哎呀。

Whoops.

是的

Yeah.

所以这通常意味着你必须逼自己别无选择地去做某事。

And so so this comes down to often giving yourself no choice but to to do something.

因此，你知道，Freedom 是我电脑上最喜欢的应用之一，就是出于这个原因。

So, you know, Freedom is one of my favorite apps on the computer for this reason.

我和那个饮料没有任何关联，就像这个播客应该由那个叫什么来着的赞助一样？

And I'm not affiliated, much like you and that drink, you know, this podcast should be sponsored by what's the name of it again?

BloomPop。

BloomPop.

BloomPop 和 Freedom。

BloomPop and Freedom.

Freedom 是我最喜欢的应用之一。

Free Freedom is one of my favorite apps.

那你熟悉它吗？

So are you are you familiar with it?

你用过吗？

Do you use it?

我用的是Cold Turkey，我觉得它和这个差不多。

I use Cold Turkey, which I think is something similar.

是的。

Yeah.

差不多。

Same difference.

Freedom，Cold Turkey。

Freedom, cold turkey.

对。

Yep.

我认为Self Control是另一个这样的应用，它本质上会禁用你发现比真正应该做、或你真正想做的事情更吸引人的那些东西的访问。

I think self control is another one where essentially you disable access to a lot of the things that you find more attractive than the thing that you really ought to be doing, than the thing that you want to be doing over a broader period of time.

所以，我个人在写作时，总会不自觉地去关注那些比写作更有趣的事情。

So personally, whenever I write, I find I gravitate to things that are more interesting than writing.

我会想再检查一次我的邮件。

I'll I'll wanna check my email one more time.

我会想，你知道的，打开社交媒体。

I'll want to, you know, fire up social media.

我并不是特别热衷于社交媒体，但有时候我会打开看看朋友们在做什么，看看新闻，诸如此类的事情。

I'm not, you know, big into social media, but sometimes I'll fire up social media, see what my friends are up to, check the news, you know, whatever it might look like.

所以Freedom会屏蔽掉那些比你该做的事更具吸引力的网站或应用。

And so freedom disables the things that are more attractive on your computer than what you ought to be doing.

你可以提前设置一个屏蔽列表。

You can specify a block list ahead of time.

所以即使你想访问这些内容，在你设定的时间段内，你也必须重启电脑。

So even if you want to access these things, you have to restart your computer if it's in the time period that you specify.

我另一个最喜欢的习惯是厌恶日记。

Another one of my favorite habits is aversion journaling.

我会拿过我的笔记本——它一直放在我工作时手边，还有我的派通Pilot Precise V5 RT笔，你知道的，既然我们已经在抛出各种生产力建议了，或者不管怎样，就试着制造点争议吧。

So so what I'll do is I'll grab my notepad, which is always by my side as I work, and my Pilot Precise V five RT pen, which, you know, as long as we're throwing productivity fire out there or whatever, try trying to cause controversy.

这是市面上最好的笔。

This is the best pen available.

可以出来

Can come That's out

最好的笔。

the pen available.

是的。

Yeah.

这是市面上最好的笔。

It's the best pen available.

是什么让它成为最好的笔？

What what makes it the best pen?

哦，你试过用一支叫Pilot Precise V5 RT的笔写字吗，克里斯？

Oh, have you tried writing with a, what's it called, Pilot Precise v five RT, Chris?

没有。

No.

没有。

No.

给我讲讲吧。

Tell me about it.

体验怎么样？

What's the experience like?

哦，它在视频里显示不出来。

Oh, well, well, it it won't come through at video.

对吧？

Right?

你需要确认一下。

You need to okay.

没有。

No.

是的。

Yeah.

这就像你上学时的女朋友一样，哦，她去的是另一所学校，你根本不会知道。

This is the same as who's your girlfriend in school, and it's like, oh, she goes to a different school, you wouldn't know.

嘿。

Hey.

不。

No.

不。

No.

不。

No.

不。

No.

我保证。

I promise.

我保证。

I promise.

它只花两美元左右。

It costs like $2.

人们可以自己试试。

People can try for themselves.

你再也回不去了。

You'll never go back.

我和我妻子有一次吵架，因为我当时说我知道最好的笔是什么。

My my wife and I got in an argument one time because I said, I know what the best pen is.

她说：不，我知道最好的笔是什么。

She said, No, I know what the best pen is.

我们在说出各自说的笔之前，就已经开始争论了。

And we had this argument before sharing what pen we were talking about.

结果发现，我们说的都是百乐Precise V5 RT。

It turns out we were both talking about the Pilot Precise V five RT.

我用百乐Precise V5 RT的时候，念起来特别顺口，对吧？

What I'll do with the Pilot Precise V five RT is, rolls right off the tongue, doesn't it?

我会拿个笔记本，做一些我称之为‘厌恶日记’的东西：当我发现自己抗拒做某事时，我会写下原因。

Is I'll grab the notepad and I'll do some, I call it aversion journaling, where when I find that I'm resisting doing something, I'll write down why.

你知道，有时候我会很系统地逐一分析每个触发因素。

You know, and it won't sometimes it'll be as methodical as going through each of the triggers.

你知道吗？

You know?

是无聊吗？

Is it boring?

是的。

Yeah.

是让人沮丧吗？

Is it frustrating?

不是。

No.

但确实很无聊。

But it's really boring.

所以有时候我会逐一分析这些触发因素，也可能更随意、更松散一些。

So I'll I'll go through the triggers sometimes, or it can be more loosey goosey, more casual.

我会随手拿起笔记本开始写，为什么我觉得这件事这么讨厌，我能做些什么来抵消这种讨厌感，对吧？让事情不那么令人抗拒。

I'll just grab the notepad and start writing, why do I find this thing so ugly and what can I do about it to counterbalance that ugliness, right, to make it less aversive?

每次我都会带着一些具体的策略离开，让我自己觉得没那么讨厌；如果做不到这一点，至少我对这件事的态度也会有一点改变。

And I always leave with some tactical thing that I can do to make it less ugly for myself, and if not that, you know, my relationship with it changes a little bit.

我明白了是什么让它如此令人抗拒，所以给自己一个选择：要么做一下抗拒日记，要么直接去做这件事。

I understand what makes it so aversive, and so give yourself a choice to either do some aversion journaling or do the thing.

最终时间会证明一切，你一开始可能会倾向于写日记，但最终你会解开那些让你不愿行动的结，从而克服对它的抗拒。

And so eventually the time will and you'll gravitate to the journaling at first, but you'll end up untangling the knots that you have to doing something and overcome that resistance to doing it.

这是一项很有趣的策略，但对我个人来说，几乎每次都有效。

So it's an interesting tactic, but it it works almost without fail for me personally.

它可能——我觉得对读者、听众，甚至观众也有效。

It might it might I I think it will for readers, listeners too, viewers.

那丑陋的目标和有吸引力的目标之间有什么区别呢？

What about the difference between ugly goals and attractive goals?

因为同样地，我正在尽量考虑尽可能多的异议处理方式。

Because there's some again, I'm trying to think about as much objection handling as possible.

有些目标就是比其他目标更有趣。

There are some things that are just funner goals than others.

有些目标比较讨厌，有些目标则更有吸引力。

There are some goals that are uglier and some goals that are more attractive.

嗯。

Mhmm.

是的。

Yeah.

每个目标在这一基本层面上都有所不同。

It's it's just every goal is a bit different on on that fundamental level.

所以，你经常会对目标进行修改，尽可能把它调整到最好的状态，但即便如此，在很多情况下它仍然很讨厌，还是很糟糕。

And so, you know, often you'll edit a goal, and you'll get it to as good, in good a shape as you possibly can, and it's still ugly, it's still fugly in a lot of cases.

因此，到了这一步，你别无选择，只能决定：这个目标值得追求吗？

And so, you got no choice at that point to decide, is this goal worth pursuing?

有时候，你虽然反复修改了一个目标，但依然觉得它很糟糕，这可能是一个信号，说明这个目标从根本上与你的身份和价值观不符，或许值得放弃。

And sometimes the fact that you have tried to edit a goal extensively and you still find it ugly, sometimes that's a sign that it could be worth dropping when it's just fundamentally not aligned to who you are and what you care about.

但你清单上也有一些目标，比如降低胆固醇，可能很少有人想做，但如果你的胆固醇偏高，那你确实应该去做。

But then you have the goals on your list that's like, lower my cholesterol or something, which probably few people wanna do, but if your cholesterol is high, you should probably do it.

于是你就有了那些你真正应该实现的目标。

And so then you have the goals that you really ought to be achieving.

所以判断标准是，想想看：我会因为做了这件事而感到开心吗？它会对我的生活带来哪些切实的改变？

And so the litmus test is, you know, is thinking, okay, will I be happy that I did this thing and what tangible difference will it make to my life?

因为，我不记得是谁说的了，但有人说过，要想让我们的日子有所不同，我们的生活就必须有所改变。

Because, and I forget who said it, but somebody said, you know, for our days for our days to be different, our life needs to be different.

我觉得，你可以反过来想：要想让我们的生活有所改变，我们的日子就必须有所不同。

I think, you know, you can kind of transpose those, for our life to be different, our days need to be different.

嗯。

Mhmm.

你的目标在日常生活中具体是什么样子的？

What what do your goals look like on a tangible daily basis?

因为我们常常陷入另一个陷阱，我称之为复古色调的目标，即我们对改变生活后会有多么不同，有着美好的幻想。

Because another trap we fall into a lot of times, I call them sepia toned goals, where you know, we have these beautiful fantasies of just exactly how different our life will be after we integrate a change into our life.

对我而言，最常出现的是每天早上5:30起床。

The one that comes up for me is waking up at 05:30 every morning.

我很喜欢当一个早起者这个想法，我确实多次尝试并把这一目标融入生活，比如我会在5:30起床，做一堆我觉得理应对我有益的事情。

So I love this idea of being an early riser, you know, and I've struggled and I've integrated this goal into my life several times actually, where, you know, I'll wake up at 05:30, I'll do all these, you know, things that feel like they should be good in my head.

我会像往常一样起床后冥想。

I'll meditate like I usually do when I wake up.

我会去健身房，读报纸。

I'll go to the gym, I'll read the paper.

我本来想说，还是会拿纸质报纸，但我还没那么老。

I was gonna say still get the physical paper, but I'm not that old.

读每天早上送来的纸质报纸，还有这些早晨的神圣仪式，但后来我意识到我根本讨厌这套流程。

Read the physical paper though that arrives every morning, you know, all these holy things with the morning, but then I realized that I absolutely hate the ritual.

对吧？

Right?

为了获得足够的睡眠，我不得不早点睡觉，即使朋友们想聚会，有精彩冰球赛播出，或者我生活中正发生着有趣的事情。

I have to go to bed in order to get a good enough sleep when people wanna hang out, when good hockey games are on, when shit's actually happening that's interesting in my life.

所以，有时候这种改变的想法是怀旧色调的，它导致了一些我们实际上并不想要的切实变化。

So there's this idea of a change sometimes that is sepia toned that leads to these tangible changes that we don't really actually want.

顺便说一下，关于早起，如果你像我一样是夜猫子，据我所知，蒂尔·罗嫩伯格的研究发现，一个人的起床时间与其社会经济地位没有关联。

And by the way, for waking up early, if you're a night owl like I am, that actual research on it, I believe by Till Ronenburg, has found that there's no difference in somebody's socioeconomic standing based on their wake up time.

所以，早上8点起床的人和早上5点起床的人一样成功，真正关键的是我们对时间的规划和用心程度。

So people who wake up at 8AM are just as successful as people who wake up at 5AM, but it's how deliberate, how intentional we are with our time that makes the biggest difference.

你知道吗？

You know?

我还是会起床，好，7点半或8点，看报纸、冥想，只是所有事情都往后推了。

Still wake up at, yeah, 07:30, eight, read the paper, meditate, just everything has just shifted over.

你觉得，人们有多少目标其实只是社会认可的野心伪装？

Do you think, how many goals do you think people have that are just kind of socially acceptable cosplays of ambition?

我觉得太多人喜欢宣称自己有这样一个目标。

I think so many people love the idea of saying that I have this goal.

也许很多人没有实现他们的目标和意图，原因在于，如果他们再仔细审视一下，就会意识到这些目标根本不是他们自己的。

And maybe the reason that lots of people aren't achieving their goals and their intentions is that if they were to look a little bit more closely, they'd realize that they weren't theirs.

他们只是在穿一件看起来很酷、很时髦的T恤，当别人问起他们的目标时，他们可以脱口而出：‘我在吃生酮饮食’，或者‘我现在只吃肉和水果’，或者‘我在微量服用致幻剂’，但这些其实并不是他们真正想要的。

They're doing it as this sort of cool, trendy T shirt that they can wear that when other people ask them what their goals are, they can say, oh, I'm I'm I'm doing a a keto diet, or I'm doing meat and fruit at the moment, or I'm I'm microdosing you know, I'm do but that's not actually what they want.

他们真正想要的，是让别人听到他们说自己想要什么。

It's what they want other people to hear them saying that they want.

是的。

Yeah.

对。

Yeah.

我正在微量服用肉和水果。

I'm microdosing meat and fruit.

你知道的，不管是什么吧。

You know, whatever it is.

这在其中占据了很大一部分。

That's such a big part of it.

所以，我大力提倡的一个策略是把你的目标列成清单。

And so, you know, one tactic that I'm a big advocate for is keeping a list of your goals.

是的。

Yeah.

我会根据情境来分类我的目标。

And divide mine based on context.

因此，我会把个人和工作方面的目标，按照它们所关联的价值观来分类。

So personal and work and inside, I list the goals under the values that they're a part of.

当我开始这么做时，我意识到清单上有很多目标，比如早起，这仍然让我觉得有意思——因为我们没有达到他人对我们的期望时，比如早起，会感到内疚。

And when I started doing this, I did realize that there were a lot of goals on the list, like waking up early is one of them, where I feel it's it's still interesting, you know, that the the guilt that we experience when we don't follow through with the expectations that other people have of us, like waking up early.

对吧？

Right?

我知道所有的研究，也知道什么对我有效。

So I know all the research, and I know what works for me.

我知道我的生物最佳时段，也就是我们天生最适合发挥的时刻。

I know what my biological prime time is, which is when we're wired to perform.

我知道这些事情。

I know all these things.

我知道我的生活更好了。

I know I have a better life.

我更享受生活了。

I enjoy life more.

我睡得晚一点时，工作表现得更好，创造的东西也更出色，但当我比自己心里认为合理的起床时间晚一些才起床时，仍然会感到内疚。

I do better work, I create better things when I wake up later, but still, I feel guilty when I roll out of bed at a later hour than, you know, than whatever I deem justifiable in my head.

所以，你知道，我很喜欢你用的那种角色扮演式的表达方式，这很有趣，因为我觉得我们的关系会根据我们在不同情境下的价值观而有所不同，而顺从是人类最基本的价值之一。

And so there is this, you know, I love the cosplay phraseology that you use, and it's interesting because I feel our relationship is different depending on our values in that context where, you know, conformity is one of the fundamental human values.

有些人确实重视顺从，如果你也是这样，那可能不太可能，因为你正在听这个播客，但昨晚我和几个人待在一起，他们把顺从列为自己的核心价值之一，我觉得这很有趣。

Some people do value conformity and so if that's you, which is probably unlikely if you're listening to this podcast, but I was hanging out with with a couple people last night who's they identified that as one of their highest values, which I I found interesting.

但如果你非常重视顺从，而别人期望你达成某个目标，研究显示，你会觉得实现这个目标很有意义，因为你是在满足他人对你的期待。

But if that's a high value for you and there's a goal that other people expect you to achieve, what the research shows is you will actually find it meaningful to achieve that thing because you're living within the expectations that other people have of you.

但如果你不重视顺从——对我来说很低，而根据我对你的了解，你的可能也很低——你就很难从那些你觉得自己‘必须’做的事中找到意义。对我而言，自我导向的价值极高，远超其他所有价值，而顺从的价值则极低，如果我觉得自己必须做某事，反而会让我更不想去做。

But if you don't have that value, which it's low for me, it's probably low for you too knowing knowing you to some extent, you're not gonna find much meaning in you know, for me, my value of self direction is so highest, the highest by a wide wide margin, and my value of conformity is so low that if I feel I have to do something, that'll make me not wanna do it.

这会让我想要反抗别人对我的期望，但那种根本性的内疚感依然存在。

It'll make me wanna rebel against the expectations other people have of me, but there still is that fundamental guilt.

所以这真的就像你问别人：‘你工作怎么样？’

So it really is a, you know, it's kind of like when you ask somebody how, you know, how's work for you?

他们说：‘哦，我太忙了。’

And they say, oh, I'm so busy.

你知道，我有太多事情要处理。

You know, I have so much going on.

这种忙碌，首先，人们往往会高估自己工作的时间；其次，他们把忙碌当作一种荣誉的象征，仿佛在说：‘世界多么需要我，我多么被世界需要，所以我这么忙。’

Where the busyness, you know, people overestimate how long they work for, first of all, but second of all, they wear that busyness as almost a badge of honor of, you know, oh, the world needs me so much, you know, and and I'm so wanted by the world, so needed by the world, and being so I'm so busy.

我们有时也会用目标进行类似的地位展示，但关键是，深入这种自我反思的能力变得尤为重要。

We have kind of a similar status projection with our goals sometimes, but, you know, tapping into that that's what makes tapping into that self reflective capacity just so much more important.

如果我们从不开启自我反思的能力，就永远无法真正得到我们想要的东西。

If we never tap into our self reflective capacity, we'll never truly get what we want.

本集由Whoop赞助播出。

This episode is brought to you by Whoop.

我已经佩戴Whoop五年多时间了，早在它成为节目合作伙伴之前。

I have been wearing Whoop for over five years now, before they were a partner on the show.

根据应用程序的记录，我已经追踪了超过一千六百天的生活数据，这简直不可思议。

I've actually tracked over sixteen hundred days of my life with it according to the app, which is insane.

它是唯一一款我坚持使用的可穿戴设备，因为它追踪了所有重要的数据：睡眠、锻炼、恢复、呼吸、心率，甚至步数。

And it's the only wearable I've ever stuck with because it tracks everything that matters, sleep, workouts, recovery, breathing, heart rate, even your steps.

而最新的5.0版本是迄今为止最好的版本。

And the new five point o is the best version.

它保留了所有让Whoop不可或缺的优势，体积缩小了7%，同时电池续航长达14天，并新增了HealthSpan功能，用于追踪你的生活习惯如何影响你的衰老速度。

You get all the benefits that make Whoop indispensable, 7% smaller, but now it's also got a fourteen day battery life and has HealthSpan to track your habits, how they affect your pace of aging.

它还为女性提供了荷尔蒙洞察功能。

It's got hormonal insights for ladies.

我是Whoop的超级粉丝。

I'm a huge, huge fan of Whoop.

这就是为什么它是唯一一款我坚持使用的可穿戴设备。

That's why it's the only wearable that I've ever stuck with.

最重要的是，你可以免费加入。

And best of all, you can join for free.

无需支付任何费用即可获得全新的Whoop 5.0手环，而且第一个月免费，并享有30天无理由退款保障。

Pay nothing for the brand new Whoop five point o strap, plus you get your first month for free, and there's a thirty day money back guarantee.

所以你实际上可以免费获得它。

So you can buy it for free.

免费试用一下吧。

Try it for free.

如果你在29天后还不满意，他们会全额退款给你。

If you do not like it after twenty nine days, they just give you your money back.

现在，你可以通过点击下方描述中的链接或访问 join.whoop.com/modernwisdom 来获取全新的Whoop 5.0和30天试用期。

Right now, you can get the brand new Whoop five point o and that thirty day trial by going to the link in the description below or heading to join.whoop.com/modernwisdom.

网址是 join.whoop.com/modernwisdom。

That's join.whoop.com/modernwisdom.

是的。

Yeah.

我想看看。

I suppose look.

社会压力是一种极强的推动力。

Social pressure is a a hell of a improver.

当我们想要完成某件事时，它是一种极强的助力。

It's a hell of a assistance when we want to try and get something done.

这就是为什么你通常在课堂上训练得比独自一人时更努力。

It's why you train harder when you're in a class than when you're on your own, typically.

我还好。

I alright.

我想知道，人们如何让自己的目标和意图显得更有深度？

I guess, how can people make their goals and intentions feel deeper?

当然有一些目标能深深引起我们的共鸣，而另一些则不然，但我们希望它们也能引起共鸣。

There's certainly some that resonate with us a lot, and then there's others that don't so much, but we wish we that they did.

我们有没有办法让目标显得更有深度？

Is there something we can do to make goals sort of feel deeper?

是的。

Yeah.

所以价值观这一部分是一个关键因素，而且是非常重要的一个方面。

So the values component is one, and that's a big one.

你提到的正是我们所处的社会环境。

And there is, you know, you're touching on the social environments that we're a part of.

现在有很多所谓的‘生产力极端分子’，他们会说，永远不要和那些不支持你和你目标的人待在一起。

There are kind of a lot of productivity extremists out there, I'd call them, you know, people who, you know, they'll say never surround yourself with people who don't support you and your goals.

但生活远比这复杂得多。

But life is just more complex than that.

举个例子，我有一些好朋友，他们有一些不好的习惯。

You know, we have good friends that have bad habits, you know, speaking personally.

当我和家人在一起时，他们的很多行为——我不会点名批评——但确实不太符合我自己的目标。

When I'm around family, a lot of their, I'm not gonna call anyone out, but a lot of their habits aren't conducive to, you know, the goals that I have.

但我若因此把他们从我的生活中剔除，那就太冷漠无情了；不过，确实存在一种积极的社会传染效应，我认为我们可以为很多目标主动营造这种效应：当你设定一个全新的重大目标或想培养一个新习惯时，可以好好反思一下：我该如何进一步强化自己在这个目标上所受到的积极影响？

But still, I'd be cold and heartless to weed them out of my life or, you know, some But there is kind of positive social contagion that I think we can introduce for a lot of our goals, where if you have a big new goal, a big new habit that you're trying to integrate into your life, you can really reflect, okay, how can I actually double down on how much contagion I'm experiencing for this goal?

因此，我们可以为任何目标叠加这种刻意性。

And so there is that level of deliberateness that we can layer on top of whatever that goal is.

比如，我可以加入一个跑步小组吗？

Where it's like, can I join a running group?

我的目标是完成一定的锻炼时间或跑步时间。

You know, my intention is to get a certain workout time or a certain run time.

你加入了一个编织小组，对吧？我以前比现在更爱编织，我想更多地投入其中，因为这是一种很好的社交方式。

You're joining a knitting group, right, I used to be a bigger knitter than I am right now and I wanted to get more into it because it's a great way to scatter your Knitting is a group.

是的，是的，所以这就像是

Yeah, yeah, and so it's Like all

一个让人们一起编织的聚会。

meetup for people to knit.

是的，我以前住的城市里有一家编织用品店。

Yeah, and there was a knitting store in the city that I used to live in.

我算不上是个出色的编织者，但我觉得这真是个不错的方式。

I'm not a good knitter, you know, by any stretch, but I found it a great way.

我喜欢你现在那种得意的笑容。

I love the smirk that you have right now.

这

It's

我简直震惊于居然有人在晚上聚在一起练CrossFit。

like I'm blown away by the fact that there's people getting together, like CrossFit on an evening.

哦，是的。

Oh, yeah.

交叉编织。

Cross knit.

是的。

Yeah.

交叉编织。

Cross knit.

是的。

Yeah.

是的。

Yeah.

那会很好。

That'd be good.

是的。

Yeah.

唉，我不行。

Well, I'm no good.

比如，我能做些抹布之类的东西，但当我住在以前的城市时，参加那个编织小组，说实话，我那时在这件事上的进步速度和现在完全不一样。

Like, I can make dishcloths and and stuff, but but when I was a part of the knitting group in in the city that I used to live in, man, I like, my level of improvement with that habit was a a different curve than it is right now.

说真的，我正任由这个习惯慢慢消退。

If anything, it's I'm kind of letting the habit die right.

我以前住的城市里有一家编织店，会组织这种聚会。

There's a knitting store in the city that I used to live in, which hosted this kinda meetup.

那里都是些上了年纪的女性，她们是我最喜欢的人。

All, you know, older women, of the, like, my favorite people in the world were in that group.

所以，你知道，这种社会传染性真的能帮助你养成想要的习惯。

And so, you know, having that social contagion can really support you in the habits that you wanna form.

这是一种让习惯更深入的方法。

That's one way to make it deeper.

在我们的生活中，没有什么比人与人之间的连接更深刻了。

Nothing feels deeper in our life than human to human connection.

好的。

Alright.

综合所有这些，结构是什么样的？

Taking all of this together, what's the what's the structure?

有人认同意图很重要这个观点。

Someone is bought into the fact that intentions are important.

他们意识到拖延是存在的。

They realize that procrastination's there.

他们已经有了目标。

They've got goals.

他们有行动。

They've got actions.

他们有每日的明确目标，以及其他所有相关内容。

They've got daily daily purp all the rest of the stuff.

把这一切整理成一个可遵循的格式，最好的方法是什么？

What's the best way to put this into a format to follow?

人们应该如何设计更好的意图？

How should people design better intentions?

嗯哼。

Mhmm.

是的。

Yeah.

所以，我现在非常相信，变得更加有意识是一种可以通过时间不断提升的技能。

So it's interest something that I really believe now is becoming more intentional is a skill that we can get better at over time.

所以，如果你看看自己的执行力，这本书最初叫《执行力》，但在英国，这个说法有一些我之前不知道的奇怪含义。

So, you know, if you look at your level of follow through, the book was originally called Follow Through, but it has weird connotations in The UK that I was not aware of.

你可能对它们很熟悉，对吧？

You're probably familiar with them, right?

说到坚持，是的。

Follow through, yes.

是的。

Yeah.

对。

Yes.

人们可以自己去城市词典上查。

People can go on Urban Dictionary in their own time.

但如果你希望提高实现目标的执行力，我应该说，你查了之后就会明白了。

But if you're looking to increase your level of follow through with your goals, I should say, It'll make sense when you look it up.

让我不得不给这本书改名，这完全出乎我的意料，因为‘执行力’这个说法原本概括得非常好。

That was like totally out of left field for me having to rename the book, because it was such a good encapsulation.

它就是

It was

最初叫《Follow Through》？

originally called Follow Through?

是的，原本是这样。

Yes, it was.

哇，本来可能会是这样，不过不，你只在英国需要改名，在美国本来就没问题。

Wow, would have been, well no, you only need to rename it in UK, it would have been fine in The US.

是的，在美国本来就没问题。

Yeah, in The US it would have been fine.

英国出版社的市场营销真的很尴尬，当你有不同的书名时，我很幸运的是，只有我的副标题在不同地区有所不同，但要意识到，提高你的执行力确实是一项可以通过时间磨练的技能。

The UK publisher really, marketing is so awkward when you have differently named books, I'm fortunate that only my subtitles have been different across geographies, but realize that increasing your level of thought through is really a skill that you can get better at over time.

所以也许你设定了目标，现在也设定了意图，对于某个目标，你确实坚持执行了。

So maybe you set goals, you set intentions right now, and maybe for a given goal you follow through with it.

我们假设这是常态，对吧？

Let's say the default, right?

我们只有8%的时间能坚持完成新年决心。

8% of the time we follow through with our New Year's resolutions.

也许当你决心做一件大事时，只有8%的时间能坚持到底。

Maybe when you resolve to do something big, you follow through with it 8% of the time.

但你可以培养这种有意识的技能，也可以为那些不得不做的枯燥事情，比如降低胆固醇，建立有意识的习惯。

But you can build this skill of intentionality, and you can build these practices of intentionality for, you know, there's the obligatory ugly stuff lowering your cholesterol.

你可以把拖延的习惯用在这些事情上。

You can deploy the procrastination habits on those.

所以，如果你想开始做某件事，我最喜欢的一个策略就是降低做这件事的阻力。

So just looking to get started on something, one of my favorite tactics out there is shrinking your resistance level to doing things.

比如，如果你在写一本书，即使你已经断绝了所有干扰，但仍然在抗拒，你能否缩短每天做这件事的时间，直到克服这种抗拒？

So if you're writing a book, for example, and you have freedom mom or something, cold turkey on, but you're still resisting it, can you shrink how long you do it for until you overcome that resistance.

对吧？

Right?

这能增加结构感。

It adds structure.

它让事情不那么无聊，不那么令人沮丧，诸如此类。

It makes it less boring, less frustrating, all that stuff.

所以你可能会想，好吧，我想要写一个小时吗？

So you might think, okay, do I wanna write for an hour?

绝对不可能。

No way in hell.

那四十五分钟呢？

What about forty five minutes?

不行。

No.

三十分钟呢？

What about thirty?

不行。

Mm-mm.

那就对吧。

What about yeah.

二十分钟。

Twenty.

我可以写二十分钟。

I I could write for twenty.

所以，你通过缩短做某事的时间来克服这种抗拒，同时对自己更友善一些。

And and so you overcome that resistance by shrinking how long you do something for, being kinder to yourself in the process.

因此，对于那些必须做的、令人讨厌的事情，拖延策略其实非常有用。

So, you know, so the procrastination for the obligatory ugly things, the procrastination tactics are very helpful for those.

但通常情况下，我们在调整目标时拥有的灵活性，比我们想象的要大得多。

But usually, there's more latitude in editing our goals than we believe.

对吧？

Right?

所以，也许有一项你不想做的项目。

So maybe there's some project that you don't wanna do.

举个例子，你可能得写一份员工手册之类的东西。

One one, you know, one example, maybe you have to write some employee handbook or something.

所以，在你的待办事项清单上，写着‘写员工手册’，或者在列目标时，也是‘写员工手册’。

And so, you know, on your to do list, it's write employee handbook, or maybe you're making the list of goals, it's write employee handbook.

这让人反感，对吧？

That's aversive, right?

它感觉像是你必须做的事情，这符合顺从的价值观。

It feels like something you have to do which fits with that value of conformity.

但也许你可以调整一下，也许你最重要的价值观是仁慈，即帮助他人。

But maybe you edit it, maybe your biggest value is benevolence, so helping other people.

也许是自我导向，即走自己的路。

Maybe it's self direction, so going your own way.

因此，一个更好的目标或目标框架可能是指导新员工，并在手册项目中发挥创意。

And so a better goal, a better frame for the goal might be mentor new employees and get creative with the handbook project.

所以，你可能在每个目标下执行相同的一系列行动，但其中一个感觉像是你不得不做、却与你的价值观不符的事情。

So you might actually perform the same set of actions under each goal, but one feels like something you have to do that isn't aligned with what you value.

而另一个则感觉真正与你内心深处的人类动机相连。

The other feels like something that is actually connected with what truly motivates you on that deep fundamental human level.

所以，也要了解你的核心价值观。

So know your top values as well.

所以，我们之前在播客里提到过这十二个价值观。

So, you know, we mentioned the 12 of them earlier in the podcast.

不会再一一重复了。

Won't go through them again.

我们已经讨论过它们了。

We've already talked about them.

但对你来说，最强的两个价值观是哪两个？你如何让更多的目标与它们保持一致？

But what top two are the strongest for you, and how can you align more of your goals to them?

对吧？

Right?

判断一件事、一个目标是否与你最深层的价值观一致，最简单的方法就是：你已经做过它了。

The the easiest way to tell if something if a priority, if a goal is aligned with your deepest values is you've done it already.

对吧？

Right?

因为最好的、最契合的目标，它们会让你感觉毫不费力。

Because the best, most aligned goals, they feel effortless.

它们感觉就像是我们自身的自然延伸。

They feel like just an extension of who we are.

好了，这下讲完了拖延的问题。

So, okay, that covers procrastination.

我们给人们设计一个小系统吧。

Let's give it a little system for people.

这涵盖了对那些讨厌的事情的拖延，也涵盖了那些可以换种方式看待的编辑工作，提升你的欲望，以及调整你的社交环境。

That covers procrastination on the ugly stuff, editing the stuff that can be framed differently, increasing your desire, right, modifying your social environments.

但有一个很重要的方面，就是你要看到并接纳你生活中不同层次的意图，那就是同时在多个时间维度上设定意图。

But a big one where you see and you accommodate the different layers of intention in your life is setting intentions across multiple timeframes at once.

我最喜欢的一个规则是‘三法则’，我试着回想一下，以前我们聊到过这个‘三法则’吗？

One of my favorite rules for this is the rule of three, I'm trying to remember, on one of the past times we were did I mention the rule of three?

也许吧。

Maybe.

再给我们讲一遍吧。

Give us it again.

好的。

Okay.

所以，简单来说，每天早上我都会先设定当天的目标，因为这样你才能看清实际情况，进而形成不同的意图。

So all this is is, you know, at the start of every day, I like to start with the goal on a daily basis, because then you see kind of where the rubber meets the road, and you can begin to form different intentions.

所以每天早上，你在脑海中提前展望一天结束时的情景，然后问自己：到今天结束时，我最希望完成哪三件事？

So at the start of the day, you fast forward to the end of the day in your head, and you ask yourself, what are the three main things I will want to have accomplished by the day's end?

就这么简单。

That's it.

到今天结束时，我最希望完成哪三件事？

What are the three main things I'll want to have accomplished by the day's end?

因为你只能选三件，这迫使你对当前的任务进行优先级排序。

And because you can only pick three, it forces you to to prioritize what's on your plate.

你必须选出三件重要的事，其余所有不重要的事就往后放。

You have to choose three things that are important and everything else that isn't.

但如果你发现这个规则每天都很有效，你可能会想：那么这一周我想完成哪三件事？

But if you find the rule works every day, you might think, okay, what are three things that I want to accomplish this week?

对吧？

Right?

可能在工作和个人生活两个方面都适用。

Maybe in a work context and a personal context.

这样，当你设定每日目标时，就可以参考每周目标，思考：这些目标如何助力我更宏大的计划？

So that when you set the daily intentions, you can look to the weekly ones and think, okay, how can these contribute to the broader plans that I have?

这样一来，你的每日目标就开始融入你的整体规划中。

So in this way, your daily intentions begin feeding into your plans.

因此，当你设定每周目标时，可以参考你的目标清单。

And so when you set your weekly intentions, you can look to your goal list.

对吧？

Right?

你可以思考：今天我打算完成多少这样的事情？

You can think how much of this stuff do I want to bite off today?

于是，你开始建立起生活中不同层次的意图体系。

And so you begin to develop the different layers of intention that you have in your life.

你的每日意图与每周意图相契合，而每周意图又与你的计划、目标相契合，随着你不断调整，这些最终还能与你的价值观保持一致。

Your daily intentions fit with your weekly intentions, which fit with your plans, your goals, which can fit with your values as you edit them more over time.

因此，这是一种我们可以培养的技能：在更长的时间跨度内设定更好的意图，提升执行力和目标达成率，如果你重视成就的话。

So this is kind of the skill that we can develop in setting better intentions over the longer arc of time and upping our level of follow through, the goal kind, as well as our level of accomplishment if that's something that you value.

你觉得我知道这本书是新出的，对吧？

What do you think I know the book's new.

是的。

Yeah.

你认为人们从你提出的这个宏大论点中忽略了什么？

What do you think is something that people are overlooking from this big thesis that you've put together?

你知道，人们肯定会关注那些显而易见的东西，比如关于拖延的见解，以及如何重新定义意图之类的。

You know, you've got the the the obvious things that people are going to zero in on, probably the insights around procrastination and ways to reframe intentions and stuff like that.

但有没有什么不太吸引人却非常有力的元素，是你觉得大多数人忽视了的？

But is there something that so a less sexy but powerful element that you think most people are overlooking?

是的。

Yeah.

我来分享一下我个人最喜欢的。

My I'll I'll share my personal favorite.

我们的价值观是由我们的默认意图构建而成的。

It is that our values are constructed out of our default intentions.

所以我们的默认意图会形成一种模式，你可以从中看到，这种模式就是我们的价值观。

So our default intentions, they form a shape, And so you can look at and the shape is the values that we have.

你可以观察所有你习惯性做的事情，而这些习惯性行为背后总是有潜在的动机。

So you can look at all the things you do by default, and there's always an underlying motivation behind the things that you do by default.

对吧？

Right?

你习惯冥想，是因为这能让你更接近自己想要的自我掌控，或者让你内心更安心、更平静。

You have a default habit of meditating because that allows you to get closer to what you want with self direction or, you know, you feel more secure in your mind, you feel calmer.

你有给朋友打电话的习惯，这可能与仁爱和帮助他人的价值观相关。

You have habits to call friends and that might connect with different values of benevolence and serving others.

但即使是简单的事情，比如吃得过多，也可能源于对安全和不挨饿的生物性需求。

But even the simple things, right, overeating or something might fit with that biological need for security and not starving.

从那些深深根植于心的、我们形成的默认意图来看，这些构成了我们价值观的框架。也许这个答案对这个问题来说太过细节了，但我觉得这一点被严重低估了——我们的价值观正是由我们日常的行为所塑造的。

So from the deeply, deeply ingrained to the default intentions that we form, so these form the framework of our values, and this might be too in the weeds for an answer to this question that's interesting, but I think this is very underrated, where our values are made out of the things that we do by default.

正因为这个观点，我认为我们的默认意图并不是什么值得沮丧的东西，比如‘我为什么总是暴饮暴食？’‘我为什么要做这个、做那个？’

And it's for this idea that I think our default intentions aren't, you know, they're not just something to get frustrated by, you know, oh, why do I overeat, or why do I do this, why do I do that?

在很多层面上，其实都值得钦佩，对吧？

There's something on many levels to admire, right?

我们可以观察自己纯粹凭着习惯能量行事，比如下意识地和孩子玩耍。

We can observe ourselves acting through pure habit energy and playing with our kids on habit, whatever it might look like.

我认为，我们的默认习惯有时确实值得我们感到沮丧，并在学到某些东西后，或者在激活自我反思能力后，设定新的意图。

And I think our default habits, you know, sometimes they're worth getting frustrated by and setting a different intention after something we've learned maybe or maybe after tapping into that self reflective capacity.

但其他时候，它们也值得我们惊叹。

But I think other times they're worth marveling at.

是的？

Right?

事实上，在我看来，我们拥有所有这些美丽的默认意图，它们让我们成为真正的人——因为我们不仅被自然塑造成某种行为模式，还能欣赏那个由过往选择所塑造的自己。

We have all of these, frankly, in my opinion, beautiful default intentions that I think make us human, right, because we're not only ingrained in a certain way to act in a certain way, but we also, you know, we can also admire the person that not only nature has formed, but also that we have formed through the decisions that we've made in the past.

而我们可以将这些有意识的意图叠加在生活的默认模式之上，这是一种绝佳的方式，能让我们走向不同的方向，真正引导自己和人生走向新的路径。

And those deliberate intentions that we can layer on top of the defaults of our life, this wonderful way that we can go in a different direction and really guide ourselves and our lives to go in a different way.

目标是其中的重要部分，价值观也是如此。

And goals are a big part of that, but values are a big part of that.

优先事项、计划和每日意图。

Priorities, plans, and daily intentions.

所以我认为，对我们的默认模式感到惊叹，是这本书中一个被低估的观点。

So I I just think marveling at our defaults is an underrated idea from the book.

没错。

Heck yeah.

克里斯·贝利，各位女士们、先生们。

Chris Bailey, ladies and gentlemen.

人们应该去哪里了解你所有的项目和内容？

Where should people go to check out everything that you got going on?

哦，哦，是的。

Oh, oh, yeah.

首先，非常感谢你再次邀请我上这个播客。

Well, first of all, thank you for having me on on the pod again.

《刻意：如何完成你开始的事情》是这本书的名字。

Intentional How to Finish What You Start is the name of the book.

如果你有兴趣了解，这本书也有有声书版本，适合喜欢听书的人。

If you feel inclined to check it out, there's an audiobook too if that's your style.

chrisbailey.com 是我通讯稿的发布地，也是你能找到的所有精彩内容的所在地，我不知道该怎么称呼它，反正就是克里斯·贝利的世界吧。

Chrisbailey.com, that's where my newsletter is and then all the good stuff that you can find in the, I don't know what you wanna call it, the Chris Bailey verse, whatever.

是的。

Yeah.

再次感谢你邀请我。

Thanks for having me on again.

明白，老兄。

I got you, man.

非常感谢你。

I appreciate you.

我喜欢你的作品。

I like your work.

继续坚持下去。

Keep on doing it.

哦，谢谢，兄弟。

Oh, thanks, buddy.

和你聊天总是很愉快。

Great to chat with you always.

当我刚开始接触个人成长时，我特别想读最好的书、最有影响力的作品、最有趣的书，以及最容易阅读、内容最丰富又引人入胜的书。

When I first started doing personal growth, I really wanted to read the best books, the most impactful ones, the most entertaining ones, the ones that were the easiest to read and the most dense and interesting.

但当时并没有这样的书单，于是我不断搜索、搜索、再搜索，最后放弃了，干脆自己开始读。

But there wasn't a list of them, so I scoured and scoured and scoured and then gave up and just started reading on my own.

然后我整理了一份我所读过的一百本最佳书籍清单，你现在可以免费获取。

And then I made a list of 100 of the best books that I've ever found, and you can get that for free right now.

所以，如果你想花更多时间阅读那些不会让你读一页就崩溃、记忆力和注意力全被耗尽的好书，去 chriswillx.com/books 获取我这份免费的百本必读书单吧。

So if you want to spend more time around great books that aren't going to completely kill your memory and your attention just trying to get through a single page, go to chriswillx.com/books to get my list completely free of 100 books you should read before you die.

那是 chriswillx.com/books。

That's chriswillx.com/books.