本集简介
双语字幕
仅展示文本字幕，不包含中文音频；想边听边看，请使用 Bayt 播客 App。
这是一个iHeart播客节目。
This is an iHeart podcast.
品质保证，人性呈现。
Guaranteed Human.
我是乔纳森·戈德斯坦。
I'm Jonathan Goldstein.
在《重头戏》新一季中，于是我拿枪指着他说道，这可不是玩笑。
And on the new season of Heavyweight And so I pointed the gun at him and said, isn't a joke.
一个14岁时抢劫过银行的男人。
A man who robbed a bank when he was 14 years old.
还有一位百岁老人重新寻回八十年前错失的爱情。
And a centenarian rediscovers a love lost eighty years ago.
一位101岁的老妇人如何能再度坠入爱河？
How can a 101 year old woman fall in love again?
请在iHeartRadio应用、苹果播客或任何你获取播客的平台收听《重头戏》。
Listen to heavyweight on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
当你将五十年代的好莱坞元素融合在一起，会得到什么？
What do you get when you mix nineteen fifties Hollywood?
一位怀揣梦想的古巴音乐家，加上一部史上最具标志性的情景喜剧。
A Cuban musician with a dream and one of the most iconic sitcoms of all time.
你得到了德西·阿纳兹。
You get Desi Arness.
在这档由德西·阿纳兹和威尔默·瓦尔德拉玛主持的播客中，我将带你探索德西的人生历程，看他如何重新定义美国电视，以及这对我们这些在荧幕外期待看到相似面孔的观众意味着什么。
On the podcast starring Desi Arness and Wilmer Valderrama, I'll take you on a journey to Desi's life, how he redefined American television, and what that meant for all of us watching from the sidelines, waiting for a face like ours on screen.
请在iHeartRadio应用、Apple播客或你获取播客的任何平台收听《德西·阿纳兹与威尔默·瓦尔德拉玛主演》。
Listen to starring Desi Arnaz and Wilmer Valderrama on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
本周《亲爱的切尔西》节目，由我切尔西·汉德勒主持。
This week on Dear Chelsea with me, Chelsea Handler.
尼古拉斯·斯帕克斯今天来到了现场。
Nicholas Sparks is here.
我想你应该收到过很多反馈，说你设定的浪漫标准让很多男性难以企及。
I would imagine that you've gotten a lot of feedback about setting a standard of romance that a lot of men can't measure up to.
我听过一些故事。
I have heard stories.
同时，我在签售会上收到了七次求婚。
At the same time, I've had seven marriage proposals in lines to sign my book.
真的吗？
Really?
到桌子这边来。
Get up to the table.
杜德晚上跪下了。
Doodle dropped his knees at night.
我当时就想，老兄，你可是在阿拉巴马州伯明翰的沃尔玛啊。
And I'm like, dude, you're in a Walmart in Birmingham, Alabama.
你懂吗？
You know?
请在iHeartRadio应用、Apple播客或任何你获取播客的地方收听《亲爱的切尔西》。
Listen to Dear Chelsea on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
不要用昨日的成功标准来衡量今日的进步。
Don't judge today's progress by yesterday's definition of success.
曾经重要的事如今可能已不再重要。
What mattered then might not matter now.
不要被年轻时的梦想束缚住自己。
Don't hold yourself hostage to the dreams of your younger self.
如果你已经超越了那些梦想，这完全没问题。
It's okay if you've outgrown them.
不要将现在的自己与早已不合时宜的旧标准相比较。
Don't compare today's version of you to an old standard that no longer fits.
昨天的目标适合当时的你。
Yesterday's goals were right for who you were then.
今天的目标适合现在的你。
Today's goals are right for who you are right now.
排名第一的健康与养生播客节目。
The number one health and wellness podcast.
杰伊·谢蒂
Jay Jay Shetty.
独一无二的杰伊·谢蒂
The one, the only Jay Shetty.
嘿，
Hey,
各位
everyone.
欢迎回到《On Purpose》节目
Welcome back to On Purpose.
我是你们的主持人杰伊·谢蒂
It's your host, Jay Shetty.
无论你是在做饭、打扫卫生、赶着去上班、在健身房锻炼还是遛狗，我都非常感谢你能收听节目
And whether you're cooking, whether you're cleaning, whether you're rushing off to work, whether you're at the gym, you're walking your dog, I'm so grateful that you're joining me.
谢谢你让我走进你的生活和耳朵
Thank you for letting me into your life and your ears.
我不会把你们的时间视为理所当然。
I don't take your time for granted.
我想让这30分钟成为改变你思维模式的最佳时光。
And I wanna make this the best thirty minutes to shift your mindset.
感谢你投入这段时间，让我们开始吧。
Thanks for investing this time and let's go get it.
所以如果你感到困顿，感到落后，感到被生活甩在身后，这期节目就是为你准备的。
So if you've been feeling stuck, if you're feeling late, if you're feeling behind, this episode is for you.
也许你正看着朋友们纷纷结婚，而你在想：我甚至不知道未来会和谁在一起。
Maybe you're seeing all your friends get married right now and you're thinking, I don't even know who I'm going to be with.
也许你的朋友们都在升职或搬进更好的公寓，而你在想：我还住在父母家。
Maybe all your friends are getting promoted or moving into a nicer apartment and you're thinking, I'm still living at home.
也许你们中有些人环顾四周，只觉得别人似乎都过得更好。
Maybe some of you are looking around you and just thinking everyone seems to be doing better.
每个人都看起来更幸福。
Everyone seems happier.
每个人都看起来生活丰富多彩，而我觉得无聊。
Everyone seems like they have more going on and I'm feeling bored.
如果你有过这些感受，我想让你知道，你此刻的想法和感受其实是你成就最好自我的跳板，而非终点。
If you felt any of those things, I want you to know that what you're thinking and feeling right now is actually the launch pad to your best self, not a dead end.
看，现实是这样的。
See, here's the reality.
我们的目标并未改变。
Our targets haven't changed.
只是它们现在看起来比以往任何时候都更难实现。
They just feel more unattainable than ever.
我们成长在一个强调上大学、拿好学位、找好工作、结婚的世界，所有这些都要在特定年龄前完成。
We grew up in a world that was all about going to college, getting a good degree, getting a good job, getting married, and all these things had to happen by a certain age.
然后在特定年龄前生孩子，在特定年龄前升职，而我们似乎仍在用这些标准衡量自己，尽管世界已发生巨变。
Then having kids by a certain age, promoted by a certain age, and it almost feels like we're still living by those metrics, but in a world that is drastically changed.
在一个实际上以完全不同方式运作的世界里。
In a world that is actually processing itself completely differently.
行业已经改变，应用程序被发明出来，人工智能和技术领域发生了翻天覆地的变化，但我们仍然在用同样的成功标准生活。
Industries have changed, apps have been invented, there is so much happening with AI and technology, but we're still living by the same metrics of success.
今天我想探讨的是你们头脑中的情绪反应、想法和感受，并与你们讨论重置、数据以及对我们生活中真实发生的事情进行反思的方法。
What I want to address today is talk about the emotional response and the thought in your head and the feelings that you're having, and talk to you about the reset, the data, and the reflective approach to what's really happening in our lives.
所以现在我们很多人首先想到的，也许你也有这种想法，就是我落后于所有人。
So the first thought that a lot of us are having right now, and maybe you've had this one as well, is I am behind everyone.
我落后了。
I'm behind.
我被落下了。
I've been left behind.
每个人都比我领先。
Everyone's ahead of me.
我不知道该怎么办。
I don't know what to do.
社会学家称之为'社会时钟'的概念。
Sociologists call this the idea of a social clock.
诸如在特定年龄结婚、生子或事业有成的里程碑。
Milestones like marriage, kids, or career by a certain age.
但研究表明，偏离社会时钟的人往往报告同等或更高的生活满意度。
But studies show that people who deviate from the social clock often report equal or greater life satisfaction.
所以我们以为如果按部就班，就会更幸福。
So we think if I stay on track, I'll be happier.
但事实是，那些不走寻常路的人要么同样幸福，要么可能更幸福。
But the truth is those who deviate are either equally as happy or potentially even more happy.
没有所谓的迟到。
There's no late.
只有属于你的时刻。
There's only your time.
社会时钟是社会为我们设定的不言而喻的时间表。
The social clock is the unspoken timeline society sets for us.
二十出头毕业，二十七八岁结婚，三十岁前生子，三十五岁前买房，四十岁前达到事业巅峰，诸如此类。
Graduate by your early twenties, marry by your late twenties, kids by 30, house by 35, career peak by 40, etcetera, etcetera.
但研究人员发现，他们研究了那些按时遵循社会时钟的成年人，以及那些偏离预期里程碑、或早或晚的人。
But what researchers found is that they studied adults who were on time, following the clock, and those who were off time, later or earlier than expected milestones.
结果如何？
The result?
那些对自己的节奏感到自在的人，即使偏离了社会时钟，报告的生活满意度与严格遵循时钟的人相当甚至更高。
People who felt comfortable with their own timing, even if it deviated, reported equal or greater life satisfaction compared to those who rigidly followed the clock.
我真的希望你们能好好消化这一点。
I really want you to digest this.
我真的希望你们能深深吸一口气，把这些话真正听进去。
I really want you to inhale and breathe this in.
那些偏离社会时钟的人，即使不比遵循者更快乐，至少也同样快乐。
Those who deviate from the social clock are equally as happy if not more happy.
如果你还没结婚但觉得应该结了，如果还没升职但觉得应该升了，如果还没生孩子但觉得该有了——这些都不会偷走你拥有幸福、快乐、美好人生的机会。
If you're not married yet and you think you should be, if you haven't got promoted yet and you think you should be, if you haven't had kids yet and you think you should have, that doesn't steal your chance at a happy, joyful, wonderful life.
事实根本不是这样的。
That's just not how it works.
关键因素不在于人生里程碑何时发生，而在于人们对自己生活有多少掌控感和意义感。
The key factor wasn't when milestones happened, but how much control and meaning people felt over their lives.
我们内心深处挣扎的是，三十岁、三十五岁和四十岁这些数字给了我们一种掌控的错觉。
What we're struggling with at the root is thirty and thirty five and forty gives us a sense of control.
所以当我们32岁还没找到命中注定的人时，我们就觉得自己失去了掌控。
So when we get to 32 and we haven't found our person, we think we've lost control.
我们以为自己失去了自主权。
We think we've lost agency.
我们以为自己失去了选择的能力。
We think we've lost the ability to choose.
其实我们担心的并不是年龄。
We're actually not worried about age.
我们真正担心的是失控感。
What we're really worried is about control.
我想要掌控自己的人生，如果大家都在30岁完成某件事，那就意味着我失控了。
I want to be able to control my life and if everyone's doing something at 30, that means I'm out of control.
那我们该如何应对这种情况？
So what do we do with that?
掌控那些你能改变的事情。
You control the things you can change.
掌控那些你能影响的事情。
You control the things you can impact.
掌控那些你能左右的事情。
You control the things you can influence.
正是这些才会让你的生活幸福。
It's that which is going to make your life happy.
这在心理学上的重要性在于：对自己选择的主导感比按时间表达成里程碑更能预测幸福感。
Why this matters psychologically is that feeling in charge of your choices predicts happiness more than hitting milestones on a schedule.
对自己选择的主导感。
Feeling in charge of your choices.
这才是我们作为人类真正追求的。
That's what we're looking for as humans.
我们希望能明确知道自己为何要做这件事。
We want to feel like I know why I'm doing this.
但让我们先看看这个。
But let's take a look at this.
如果你基于某个里程碑做决定，而唯一理由是'我觉得自己落后了'，那你并没有真正掌控自己的选择。
If you make a decision based on a milestone, and your only reason is I think I'm late, you're not going to feel in charge of your choices.
如果你唯一的想法是'我不想被落下'，那你并没有真正掌控自己的选择。
If your only thought is I don't want to be left behind, you're not really in charge of your choices.
如果你唯一的念头是'所有人都在做，为什么我不做'，
If your only thought is everyone's doing it, why am I not?
那你并没有掌控自己的选择，这会导致糟糕的决定。
You're not in charge of your choices, which leads to bad decisions.
我常对人们说：宁可单身并应对由此带来的心理挑战，也好过与不合适的人在一起所要面对的难题。
I always say to people, it's better to be single and deal with the challenges that come with that in your mind and in your thoughts than the challenges of being with someone who's not right for you.
后者会带来更多负担和压力。
It comes with so much more baggage and stress.
明白自己掌握选择权将改变你的人生。
Knowing you're in charge of your choices will change your life.
那些感到时间压力的人常报告说，如果觉得自己落后了，就会产生焦虑、抑郁或不满情绪。
People who felt pressured by the clock often reported anxiety, depression or dissatisfaction if they felt behind.
但那些按照自己方式重新定义成功的人往往拥有更健康的心理状态。
But those who redefined success on their own terms tended to have healthier mental well-being.
这就是当今社会的现状。
And this is how that plays out today.
自20世纪60年代以来，社会时钟已经变得宽松。
The social clock has loosened since the 1960s.
人们结婚更晚，更频繁地转换职业，推迟生育，我们将在视频后面详细讨论这些现象。
People marry later, they switch careers more often, they delay kids, and we're going to talk about all of those things later on in this video.
但这种压力依然存在，并且被社交媒体放大了。
But the pressure still exists and it's just amplified by social media.
研究人员的发现比以往任何时候都更具现实意义。
The researchers' finding is more relevant than ever before.
如果你将自我价值与社会时钟脱钩，实际上会提升生活满意度的概率。
If you detach your self worth from society's stopwatch, you actually increase your odds of life satisfaction.
研究证实了我们一直试图逃避的真相。
The research proves what we keep trying to avoid.
你没有落后。
You're not late.
只有按照别人的时钟生活时，你才会觉得自己落后。
You're only late if you're living by someone else's watch.
这就像你住在纽约，却盯着新加坡居民的生活节奏，然后觉得自己落后了。
It's almost like you're living in New York, but you're looking at someone who lives in Singapore and thinking you're behind.
当然你会觉得落后。
Well, of course you're behind.
因为你住在纽约啊。
You live in New York.
你本就不可能和新加坡处在同一时区。
You couldn't possibly be on the same time as Singapore.
这是否意味着你落后了？
Does that mean you're behind?
澳大利亚比我们所有人都先庆祝新年，这很奇怪吗？
Is it weird that Australia celebrates New Year's before all of us?
这是否意味着我们落后了？
Does that mean we're behind?
不，我们只是遵循不同的时钟。
No, we're just following a different clock.
别再追随别人的时间线了。
Stop following everyone else's timeline.
别再相信别人精心剪辑的高光时刻了。
Stop believing everyone else's highlight reel.
别再追逐别人定义的成功了。
Stop chasing everyone else's definition of success.
别再试图达到别人设定的里程碑了。
Stop trying to reach everyone else's milestones.
别再因别人已把人生规划好而感到压力。
Stop feeling everyone else's pressure to have it figured out.
别再寻求他人的认可。
Stop needing everyone else's validation.
当你的灵魂指向另一条路时，别再追随他人的轨迹。
Stop following everyone else's path when your soul is pointing another way.
这样你才能体验到平静。
That's how you experience peace.
现在，假设你的想法是：我还没找到职业方向或人生目标。
Now, let's say your thought is I haven't found my career or my purpose yet.
美国劳工统计局发现，美国人平均一生会换12次工作。
The US Bureau of Labor Statistics found the average American changes jobs 12 times in their lifetime.
职业发展道路已远不如从前那样笔直。
Careers are far less straight lines than they used to be.
这些转变大多发生在35岁前，意味着你的20岁到30岁出头常常是尝试、调整和实验的阶段，而非锁定一条完美道路。
Most of these changes happen before age 35, meaning your 20s and early 30s are often about testing, shifting, and experimenting, not locking in to one perfect path.
这就是为什么你会感到落后的原因。
See that's why you feel behind.
你正处于一个更倾向于尝试和探索的年龄段。
You're at an age that is actually more predisposed to experimentation and testing.
但因为很多人选择不去这样做，他们可能加倍努力，所以你感到落后了。
But because so many people are choosing not to do that, and they might be doubling down, you feel behind.
但你实际上正按照自然的节奏前进。
But you're actually at a natural pace.
你实际上正在寻找自我、发现自我、积累技能、收集经历和故事。
You're actually finding yourself, you're discovering yourself, you're collecting skills, you're collecting experiences and stories.
如果你总是盯着时间线和轨道，即使你正在经历人生中最美好的时光，你也会感到落后。
If you're always looking at the timeline and the track, you'll feel left behind even if you're having the best experience of your life.
想在这个给予的季节真正做出改变吗？
Want to make a real difference this giving season?
今年12月，Purpose播客将参与「播客抗击贫困」活动。
This December on purpose is part of Pods Fight Poverty.
播客团队携手帮助卢旺达的三个村庄摆脱极端贫困。
Podcast teaming up to lift three villages in Rwanda out of extreme poverty.
我们通过与GiveDirect合作实现这一目标，该组织直接将现金发放给家庭，让他们自主选择最需要的帮助。
We're doing it through GiveDirectly, which sends cash straight to families so they can choose what they need most.
请访问givedirectly.org/onpurpose进行捐赠。
Donate at givedirectly.org onpurpose.
首次捐款将获得匹配，使您的影响力翻倍。
First time gifts are matched, doubling your impact.
我们的目标是在年底前筹集100万美元，足以帮助700个家庭摆脱贫困。
Our goal is $1,000,000 by year's end enough to lift 700 families out of poverty.
加入我们，请访问givedirectly.org onpurpose。
Join us at givedirectly.org onpurpose.
事实是，经济已经发生了变化。
Here's the truth, the economy has shifted.
前几代人通常会在同一家公司或同一个岗位上工作几十年。
Previous generations often stayed in one company or one role for decades.
如今，行业变革迅速。
Today, industries transform quickly.
科技、媒体、医疗等领域都在快速变化，人们必须适应。
Tech, media, healthcare, so people have to adapt.
说实话，我现在从事的工作在十五年前几乎不存在。
Literally, the job I do today didn't really exist fifteen years ago.
我刚和朋友聊到，自从我开始创作内容这九年来，一切都变了。
And I was just talking about this with my friend about how even in nine years since I started creating content, everything has changed.
我刚开始时TikTok还不存在。
TikTok didn't exist when I started.
那时YouTube正风靡一时。
YouTube was having a moment.
如今YouTube又迎来了新的热潮。
YouTube's having another moment today.
播客也没有现在这么火爆。
Podcasting wasn't as big as it is.
六年前我推出播客时，全平台只有70万档播客节目。
When I launched my podcast six years ago, there were 700,000 podcasts.
如今这个数字已经增长到约500万档。
Today, there's like 5,000,000 of them.
一切都在飞速变化。
Everything is changing rapidly.
你怎么可能确定自己该选择哪条职业道路呢？
How could you possibly know what career path you have to take?
今天我们将探讨人工智能对各行各业的影响。
Today, we're looking at the impact of AI on every industry.
这令人振奋。
It's exciting.
无需对此感到恐慌。
It's not something to get scared about.
其中蕴藏着无限机遇。
There's so much opportunity.
但我们害怕的是，为什么我不知道自己在做什么？
But what we get scared about is why don't I know what I'm doing?
现实是，你命中注定要做的事情可能还不存在。
The reality is, what you're meant to be doing may not even exist yet.
价值观已经转变了。
Values have shifted.
千禧一代和Z世代尤其重视意义、灵活性和成长，而不仅仅是稳定。
Millennials and Gen Z especially prioritize meaning, flexibility, and growth over stability alone.
这很正常。
It's normal.
心理学家阿尔内和坦纳在2006年将18至29岁描述为成年初显期，这个阶段本就应该进行身份探索，而不是迷失的标志。
Psychologists Arne and Tanner in 2006 describe ages 18 to 29 as emerging adulthood, a stage where identity exploration is expected, not a sign of being lost.
从心理学上讲，这不是迷失的标志，而是探索。
It's psychologically not a sign of being lost, it's exploration.
当你以为自己迷失时，你其实是在探索。
When you think you're lost, you're exploring.
当你觉得自己被困住时，其实你正在发现新可能。
When you think you're stuck, you're discovering.
当你以为走到死胡同时，其实你正站在起点上。
When you think you've hit a dead end, you're actually at the beginning.
职业的曲折路径反而更健康。
Career zigzags are healthier.
研究表明，允许自己转变方向的人通常工作满意度和投入度更高，因为他们能更好地发挥自身优势。
Studies show people who allow themselves to pivot often report higher job satisfaction and engagement because they align better with their strengths.
直线式发展已经过时。
Linear parts are outdated.
认为职业需要完美直线发展的观念植根于工业时代，而非当今流动的、以技能为基础的经济环境。
Thinking you need a perfect straight line career is rooted in the industrial era, not in today's fluid, skill based economy.
你的人生意义不等于你的工作。
Your purpose is not your job.
工作会变。
Jobs change.
人生意义不会被解雇。
Purpose doesn't get fired.
你的人生意义不等于你的技能。
Your purpose is not your skills.
技能只是工具。
Skills are tools.
人生意义才是你拿起工具的原因。
Purpose is why you pick them up.
你的人生意义不等于你的成就。
Your purpose is not your achievements.
奖杯终会积灰。
Trophies gather dust.
人生意义永远闪耀。
Purpose keeps shining.
你的人生意义不等于你的头衔。
Your purpose is not your title.
头衔在你走出门的那一刻就褪色了。
Titles fade the moment you walk out of the door.
你的目标不是你的收入。
Your purpose is not your income.
金钱衡量交易。
Money measures transactions.
目标衡量意义。
Purpose measures meaning.
你的目标不是某个瞬间。
Your purpose is not a single moment.
它不是那件大事。
It's not the one big thing.
它是贯穿你所有时刻的那条线。
It's the thread running through all your moments.
你的目标不是外界的认可。
Your purpose is not external approval.
点赞、掌声和认可都是不稳定的。
Likes, applause, validation are unstable.
当掌声停止时，剩下的才是人生目标。
Purpose is what remains when the clapping stops.
你的目标就是你做事的初衷。
Your purpose is why you do what you do.
这就是你存在的意义。
It's why you exist.
你的目标简单来说就是积累与联结。
Your purpose is simply to collect and connect.
用一生去积累技能、经历和故事，终有一天你会发现它们如何相互关联。
Spend your life collecting skills and experiences and stories and at one point you'll find how they connect.
也许你现在想的是'我买不起房子'。
Now maybe your thought is I can't afford a home.
我查阅了相关统计数据。
I took a look at the statistics.
想和你分享这项研究。
Wanted to share the research with you.
五十年前买房就像爬个小山坡。
Fifty years ago buying a house felt like climbing a hill.
如今却像攀登一座高山。
Today, it feels like scaling a mountain.
收入增长根本跟不上房价涨幅。
Incomes simply haven't kept up with the rise of housing prices.
1970到1990年代，普通住宅价格约为家庭平均收入的2.5到3倍。
In the 1970s to 1990s, a typical home cost about 2.5 to three times the average household income.
举例来说，若你收入3万美元，平均房价约7.9万美元。
Example, if you earn $30,000, the average house was around $79,000.
虽艰难但靠储蓄仍可实现。
It's hard but doable with savings.
到了2000年代，这个比率已攀升至接近收入的3倍。
In the 2000s, that ratio crept up closer to three times income.
那时房屋价格已开始让预算吃紧，但对多数人而言仍可负担。
Houses were starting to stretch budgets but still within reach for many people.
2010年代金融危机后，房价反弹速度远超收入增长。
In the 2010s, after the financial crisis, home prices rebounded much faster than incomes.
房价收入比跃升至约4.5倍。
The ratio jumped to about 4.5 times income.
而如今到了2025年，这一差距更是进一步扩大。
And today, in 2025, the gap has grown even more.
在美国许多地区，中位数房价已超过家庭收入中位数的六倍。
A median home costs over six times the median household income in many parts of The United States.
举例来说，若家庭平均收入为7.4万美元，而平均房价达43万美元——现在买不起房并不意味着你落后了。
For example, if the average household income makes $74,000 the average home costs $430,000 You're not behind if you can't buy a home right now.
游戏规则本身已经改变。
The game itself has changed.
情况早已今非昔比。
Things haven't stayed the same.
相比父母或祖父母的时代，房价涨幅已是收入的两倍。
Homes have outpaced incomes by 2x compared to your parents' or grandparents' time.
不要用五十年前人们的目标来衡量今天的自己。
Don't measure yourself today by the goals people had fifty years ago.
时代已经不同了。
Things are different.
你也不同了。
You're different.
不要用过去的成功标准评判今天的进步。
Don't judge today's progress by yesterday's definition of success.
那时重要的事现在可能已无关紧要。
What mattered then might not matter now.
不要被年轻时的梦想绑架自己。
Don't hold yourself hostage to the dreams of your younger self.
如果你已经超越了那些梦想，这完全没问题。
It's okay if you've outgrown them.
不要用不再适用的旧标准来评判今天的你。
Don't compare today's version of you to an old standard that no longer fits.
昨天的目标对当时的你来说是正确的。
Yesterday's goals were right for who you were then.
今天的目标对现在的你来说是正确的。
Today's goals are right for who you are right now.
也许你现在想的是我还没结婚。
Now maybe your thought is I'm not married yet.
或者我还没遇到真爱。
Or I'm not in love yet.
还没找到对的人。
Haven't found my person.
在美国，初次结婚的中位年龄现在是男性30岁、女性28岁。
The median age for your first marriage in The United States is now 30 for men and 28 for women.
相比1970年代，这个数字已上升了近十年——根据皮尤研究中心2021年的数据。
That's up nearly a decade from the 1970s from Pew Research in 2021.
我知道你在想什么，杰伊，我已经30了，32了，已经落后了，落后四年了，你刚说女性平均28岁结婚。
Now I know what you're thinking Jay, I'm 30, I'm 32, I'm already behind, I'm four years behind, you just told me it's 28.
等等。
Well, a second.
你是想结婚吗？
Do you want to be married?
还是想要一段成功的婚姻？
Or do you want to have a successful marriage?
那跟年龄无关。
Well then it's not about age.
你是想恋爱吗？
Do you want to be in love?
还是想要一段健康的关系？
Or do you want to have a healthy relationship?
那跟年龄无关。
Well then it's not about age.
你是想找个人陪伴，以免孤单吗？
Do you want to find someone so you're not alone?
还是想要一个终身伴侣？
Or do you want a life partner?
因为那样的话，年龄就无关紧要了。
Because then it's not about age.
如果你想要一份持久真挚的爱情、健康的关系、一个终身伴侣，这与年龄毫无关系。
If you want a real lasting love, a healthy relationship, a life partner, it's got nothing to do with age.
关键在于成熟度。
It's all about maturity.
关键在于情商。
It's all about emotional intelligence.
关键在于自我掌控能力。
It's all about self mastery.
关系的持久或破裂，并不取决于你们相遇时的年龄。
Relationships don't last or fall apart because of the age you met.
感情不会因为你们在30岁前相遇就更美好，也不会因为30岁后相遇就更糟糕。
Relationships are not better because you met before 30 and worse because you met after.
感情更美好是因为你们彼此都更了解自己。
They're better because you got to know yourself and so did that person.
婚姻成功的关键在于成熟度，而非时机。
Married success is about maturity, not timing.
这与年龄无关。
It's not about age.
我一直觉得这很奇妙。
I've always found it fascinating.
我热爱婚礼。
I love weddings.
我热爱爱情。
I love love.
我有幸为多对新人主持过婚礼。
I've had the fortune of officiating marriages.
当我主持婚礼时，心里不断对自己说的只有一句话：别哭，别哭，千万别哭。
And when I'm officiating a wedding, the only thing I'm saying to myself in my mind is don't cry, don't cry, don't cry.
因为我太热爱爱情了。
Because I love love so much.
我热爱婚礼。
I love weddings.
我热爱誓言。
I love vows.
我热爱这一切。
I love all of it.
但问题是。
But here's the thing.
根据我指导过的所有人和共事过的对象，人们花在策划婚礼上的时间和金钱远多于策划婚姻。
From everyone I've coached and people I've worked with, people spend so much more time and money planning a wedding than they do planning a marriage.
当你策划婚礼时，你考虑的是宾客名单。
When you're planning a wedding, you're thinking about the guest list.
如果你规划过婚姻，你就会明白余生想与谁共度。
If you planned your marriage, you'd know whose company you'd want for the rest of your life.
当你筹备婚礼时，你满脑子都是预算问题。
When you're planning a wedding, you're thinking about the budget.
当你规划婚姻时，我们却常常回避关于金钱的对话。
When you're planning a marriage, we often avoid conversations about money.
当你筹备婚礼时，你满怀期待、心潮澎湃。
When you're planning a wedding, you're excited, you're looking forward to it.
当你身处婚姻中时，可能会逐渐失去那份激情。
When you're living in a marriage, you may lose that spark.
我们花在筹备婚礼上的时间远多于经营婚姻——尽管婚姻才是伴随余生的事，而婚礼不过一夜狂欢。
We spend more time planning a wedding than we do a marriage, even though the marriage is what we're going to have for the rest of our life and the wedding is going to be over in a night.
我并不是说婚礼不重要。
And I'm not saying weddings are not important.
我自己就曾拥有过一场心仪的婚礼。
I had a wedding that I loved.
那是个非常非常美好的日子。
Was a beautiful, beautiful day.
试图帮助我们将注意力转向经营婚姻而不仅仅是婚礼，培养爱情而不仅仅是不再孤单。
Trying to help us shift our focus onto building a marriage, not just a wedding, and building love, not just not being lonely.
如果你现在32岁、30岁、34岁、35岁、40岁、50岁，无论年龄多大，我希望你提醒自己，并对自己说：晚婚并不意味着我的生活会变得更艰难。
If you're someone who's 32, 30, 34, 35, 40, 50, whatever it is, here's what I want you to remind yourself, and I want you to say this to yourself: Marrying later doesn't mean my life will be harder.
这意味着我更清楚自己想要什么。
It means I have more clarity about what I want.
我花时间成长、工作、了解自己，实际上让我更有机会获得一段美好健康的关系。
The time I've taken to grow, to work, to know myself is actually giving me a better chance for a good, healthy relationship.
婚姻的幸福不在于结婚的早晚。
Happiness in marriage doesn't come from marrying young or old.
它来自于沟通、共同的价值观和情感上的准备。
It comes from communication, shared values and emotional readiness.
我们必须重新编程我们的思维。
We've got to reprogram our mind.
我们必须转变思维方式。
We've got to shift the way we're thinking.
35岁结婚并不算晚。
You're not late if you get married at 35.
40岁遇到对的人并不算晚。
You're not late if you find your person at 40.
当别人都在晒婚纱照时你依然单身也不算晚。
You're not late if you're still single while everyone else posts wedding photos.
你的爱情故事比朋友们开始得晚也不算晚。
You're not late if your love story starts later than your friends.
在选择他人之前先选择自己也不算晚。
You're not late if you choose yourself before choosing someone else.
你等待健康的爱情而非匆忙投入有毒关系也不算晚。
You're not late if you waited for a healthy love instead of rushing into a toxic one.
当别人都已安定下来而你仍在探索自我时也不算晚。
You're not late if you're still figuring out who you are while others settle down.
如果你先建立自己的生活，再让爱情随后加入，你并不算晚。
You're not late if you build your life first and let love join it later.
你并不晚。
You're not late.
也许你现在正有这样的想法。
Now maybe the next thought is the one you're having.
我还一事无成。
I haven't achieved anything yet.
也许你找到了一份喜欢的工作。
So maybe you found a job that you like.
也许你的感情生活还算顺利，但你却在想自己一事无成。
Maybe you're doing alright in your relationship, but you're thinking I haven't achieved anything.
现在有些亿万富翁才21岁、30岁。
Right now there's billionaires that are 21 years old, 30 years old.
我在做什么呢？
What am I doing?
现在有些16岁的网红已经是百万富翁了。
Now there's influencers that are millionaires at 16.
我的人生在做什么？
What am I doing with my life?
我还一事无成。
I haven't achieved anything yet.
我没获得过任何奖项。
I haven't won any award.
我还没被注意到。
I haven't been noticed.
我还没得到认可。
I haven't been recognized.
我确信有这种感觉是很自然的。
I'm sure it's very natural to feel that way.
顺便说一句，现在的奖项数量比以往任何时候都多。
By the way, there's more awards than ever existed before.
以前我们只有艾美奖、奥斯卡、格莱美奖和托尼奖，对吧？
Before we had the Emmys, the Oscars, the Grammys, and the Tonys, right?
如今似乎有上百万种奖项对应上百万种不同事物。
Today, there's like a million different awards for a million different things.
感觉我们只是在编造奖项来颁发。
Feels like we're just making up awards to give them out.
但请思考一下这个问题。
But think about this for a second.
在本周的《下一章》节目中，我迪迪·杰克斯有幸采访了媒体大亨、慈善家和全球开拓者奥普拉·温弗瑞。
On this week's episode of the next chapter, I, Didi Jakes, get to sit down with Oprah Winfrey, a media mogul, philanthropist, and global trailblazer.
我的人生虽然看似特殊，但只因我始终听从内心的召唤才得以实现。
My life, although it may look like an anomaly, it has only been possible because I was obedient to the calls.
本期节目将深入探讨奥普拉如何将名气转化为使命，以及在万众瞩目下进化的真正含义。
This episode dives deep into how Oprah turned fame into purpose and what it really means to evolve with everybody watching.
我人生中的每个决定都源于与灵魂对话，并询问上帝：您希望我首要做什么？
Every decision I have ever made has come from sitting with the spirit and asking God, what would you have me do first?
展开剩余字幕（还有 180 条）
无论你是在重建、重新构想，还是仅仅试图维持现状，这一期节目都将与你产生共鸣。
Whether you're rebuilding, reimagining, or just trying to hold it together, this one will speak directly to you.
请在iHeartRadio应用、Apple播客或你获取播客的任何平台收听《下一章》，每周更新。
Listen to next chapter on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast episodes drop weekly.
你好。
Hi.
我是丹尼·夏皮罗，热门播客《家庭秘密》的主持人。
I'm Danny Shapiro, host of the hit podcast family secrets.
当时我们在车里，《像一块滚石》这首歌响起，他说歌词里有句关于你母亲的话。
We were in the car, like a rolling stone came on, and he said, there's a line in there about your mother.
我反问：什么？
And I said, what?
如果我感觉不被接纳，我会选择一种别人无法拥有的身份。
What I would do if I didn't feel like I was being accepted is choose an identity that other people can't have.
我知道半夜发生了些事，但就是想不起来具体发生了什么。
I knew something had happened to me in the middle of the night, but I couldn't hold on to what had happened.
这些只是我将在《家庭秘密》第十三季中探讨的部分动人而重要的故事。
These are just a few of the moving and important stories I'll be holding space for on my upcoming thirteenth season of Family Secrets.
无论你是从第一季就与我同行，还是刚刚加入《家庭秘密》这个大家庭，我们都非常高兴有你相伴。
Whether you've been on this journey with me from season one, or are just joining the Family Secrets family, we're so happy to have you with us.
我将深入探讨秘密的惊人力量——那些塑造我们身份、考验我们关系、最终揭示真实自我的秘密。
I'll dive deep into the incredible power of secrets, the ones that shape our identities, test our relationships, and ultimately reveal who we truly are.
请在iHeartRadio应用、Apple播客或你获取播客的任何平台收听《家庭秘密》。
Listen to Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
当1950年代的好莱坞、一位怀揣梦想的古巴音乐家，与史上最具标志性的情景喜剧相遇，会产生什么？
What do you get when you mix nineteen fifties Hollywood, a Cuban musician with a dream and one of the most iconic sitcoms of all time?
你会遇见德西·阿纳兹——一位开拓者、商人、丈夫，或许最重要的是，首位打破黄金时段壁垒的拉丁裔明星。
You get Desi Arnaz, a trailblazer, a businessman, a husband, and maybe most importantly, the first Latino to break prime time wide open.
我是威尔默·瓦尔德拉玛，没错，我从小看着他长大，可能就像你和数百万观众一样。
I'm Wilmer Valderrama, and yes, I grew up watching him, probably just like you and millions of others.
但对我来说，我在他的故事中看到了自己的影子。
But for me, I saw myself in his story.
从种植金丝雀笼到纽约的这个夜晚，这是一段漫长的旅程。
From planting canary cages to this night here in New York, it's a long ways.
在这档由德西·阿纳兹和威尔默·瓦尔德拉玛主演的播客中，我将带你走进德西的人生历程，那些他与我的生命交汇的时刻，他如何重新定义了美国电视，以及这对我们这些在旁观等待屏幕上出现相似面孔的人们意味着什么。
On the podcast starring Desi Arnaz and Wilmer Valderrama, I'll take you in a journey to Desi's life, the moments he has overlapped with mine, how he redefined American television, and what that meant for all of us watching from the sidelines, waiting for a face like ours on screen.
这是一个关于一个人的聚光灯如何为众多后来者照亮道路，以及我们今日如何传承他遗产的故事。
This is a story of how one man's spotlight led the path for so many others and how we carry his legacy today.
请收听由德西·阿纳兹和威尔默·瓦尔德拉玛主演的节目，作为My Cultura播客网络的一部分，可在iHeartRadio应用、Apple Podcasts或任何你获取播客的地方收听。
Listen to starring Desi Arnaz and Wilmer Valderrama as part of the My Cultura podcast network available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.
看看这项研究。
Take a look at this research.
早慧并不能保证持久的成功。
Early bloomers don't guarantee lasting success.
哈佛大学格兰特研究——这项历时最长的成人发展研究发现，70岁时的生活满意度与关系质量的相关性高于早期职业成就。
Research from Harvard's Grant study, the longest running study of adult development, found that life satisfaction at age 70 correlated more with relationship quality than with early career success.
什么能预测70岁和80岁时的幸福感？
What predicts happiness at age 70 and age 80?
不是他们的名气
It wasn't their fame.
不是他们的收入
It wasn't their income.
最能预测晚年幸福程度的并非他们早期的职业成就
It wasn't their early career achievements that best predicted who was happier later on.
而是他们与家人朋友关系的温暖程度
It was the warmth of their relationships with family and friends.
是他们社区的亲密程度
It was the closeness of their community.
那些在50岁时拥有亲密满意人际关系的人，在老年时期更健康、更幸福、更具韧性
People who had close satisfying relationships at age 50 were healthier, happier, more resilient into old age.
中年时期对人际关系满意度较高的人，到80多岁时往往身体更健康，认知衰退更缓慢，慢性疾病更少，心理和情绪状态更好
Those who reported being very satisfied in their relationships at middle age tended to have better physical health by their 80s, slower cognitive decline, less chronic illness, mental and emotional well-being.
即使生活遭遇痛苦，无论是失去、疾病还是挫折，身处温暖关系中的人在情感和身体上都能更好地应对
Even when life was painful, whether you had loss, illness or setbacks, people in warm relationships weathered it better, emotionally and physically.
二三十岁时的大成就、显赫头衔、金钱和认可，如果人际关系不牢固，并不能持续带来晚年更好的健康或更深层次的快乐。
Big wins in your 20s or 30s, big titles, money recognition didn't consistently lead to better health or deeper joy later in life, if the relationships weren't strong.
一些早期看似风光的人，如果社交关系薄弱，后来往往会陷入困境。
Some people who seemed on top early floundered later if their social bonds were weak.
与此同时，一些成就平平但人际关系牢固的人报告了更高的生活满意度。
At the same time, some with modest achievements but strong connections reported greater life satisfaction.
不要用你的成就来衡量你的人生。
Don't measure your life by your wins.
用那些为你胜利欢呼的人来衡量人生。
Measure it by the people who cheer when you win.
不要用你的成就来衡量你的人生。
Don't measure your life by what you've achieved.
不要用你的胜利来衡量人生。
Don't measure your life by your wins.
用那些在你失败时仍与你并肩的人来衡量人生。
Measure your life by the people who stand with you when you lose.
不要用你取得的成就来衡量你的人生。
Don't measure your life by what you've achieved.
要用那些真心为你庆祝的人来衡量它。
Measure it by who's there to truly celebrate you.
不要用你拥有的粉丝数量来衡量人生，而要用友谊的深度来衡量。
Don't measure your life by the size of your following, measure it by the depth of your friendships.
不要用陌生人的认可来衡量人生，而要用真正了解你的人的关爱来衡量。
Don't measure your life by the validation of strangers, measure it by the love of the ones who truly know you.
我们中有太多人都搞错了这一点。
So many of us are getting this wrong.
最近我参加了两个人的七十岁生日会。
I recently was at two people's seventieth birthdays.
两位朋友，一位是家族友人，另一位则是我的私人朋友。
Two friends, family friends, one of them and another as a personal friend.
我有幸参加了他们的七十岁生日派对，这确实是我生命中最特别的经历之一。
And I got to go to their seventieth birthday parties which was truly one of the most special experiences of my life.
他们两人都是如此。
Both of them.
在其中一人的生日会上，我们某晚坐在一起，现场大概有100人，都是这个人几十年来认识的。
At one of them we sat one night, probably about a 100 people there that this person had known for decades.
他们的孩子，以及孩子的朋友们。
Their children, their children's friends.
他们还有来自人生各个阶段的朋友——无论是求学、经商、生活还是工作中结识的。
They had their friends from all over the years whether it was school, business, life, work.
真正有趣的是，当他们的朋友谈论他们时，尽管这些人在物质层面取得了相当非凡的成就，却没有人提及这一点。
And what was really interesting is when their friends spoke about them, even though these people had achieved something pretty phenomenal in their life from a material perspective, no one mentioned it.
人们并没有把他们赚了多少钱作为成功的标准之一来谈论。
People didn't talk about how much money they made as one of their success points.
人们没有谈论他们拥有多少名声。
People didn't talk about how much fame they had.
人们没有谈论他们的职业智慧或商业策略是什么。
People didn't talk about what their career acumen was and what their business strategy was.
人们谈论的是他们作为人的品质。
People talked about how they were as people.
他们是忠诚的朋友，总是随叫随到。
They were loyal friends who always showed up.
在需要时，他们总是充满关怀与同情心。
They were caring and compassionate when they were needed.
而且他们始终都在那里。
And they were always there.
这就是我们留下的遗产。
That's what our legacy is.
这才是会被铭记的东西。
That's what will be remembered.
专注于此吧。
Focus on that.
也许你脑海中的想法是现在开始任何新事物都为时已晚。
Maybe the thought in your head is it's too late to start anything new.
神经可塑性研究表明，大脑在60至70岁时仍能生长、重组和良好适应。
Well studies on neuroplasticity show the brain can grow, rewire and adapt well into your 60s and 70s.
大脑天生具备在任何年龄重塑的能力。
The brain is built for reinvention at any age.
几十年来，科学家们认为大脑在童年后就固定不变了。
For decades scientists believed the brain was fixed after childhood.
但现代神经科学颠覆了这一认知。
But modern neuroscience flipped that belief.
大脑终生保持可塑性，能够持续变化。
The brain remains plastic, changeable throughout life.
神经可塑性意味着即便在60岁、70岁甚至更老时，你仍能建立新的神经连接、学习新技能并适应新环境。
Neuroplasticity means you can form new neural connections, learn new skills, and adapt to new environments even in your 60s and 70s and beyond.
70多岁开始学习新语言的人，其大脑活动显示出可测量的变化，认知健康也有所改善。
People in their 70s who took up a new language showed measurable changes in brain activity and improved cognitive health.
甚至学习乐器的老年人也表现出新的神经生长和更好的记忆力。
Even older adults who learned an instrument showed new neural growth and better memory.
生命的法则是这样的：你的大脑不是一块会装满并锁死的硬盘。
The principle for life is this: Your brain is not a hard drive that fills up and locks up.
它更像一块肌肉。
It's more like a muscle.
以新方式使用它，它就会重塑并持续成长。
Use it in new ways and it reshapes and continues to grow.
这意味着：开启事业、培养技能或开辟新道路永远不会太晚。
Which means this: You're never too late to start a career, build a skill, or create a new path.
你的生理机能其实站在你这边。
Your biology is actually on your side.
如果你想在40岁学习新技能，你的大脑确实会重新布线。
If you want to learn a skill at 40, your brain will literally rewire.
如果你想在50岁转行，你的大脑能形成新的神经通路。
You want to switch careers at 50, your brain can form fresh pathways.
如果你想在60岁重头再来，你的大脑仍具备成长能力，只是稍慢一些，但完全可能。
You want to start over at 60, your brain is still capable of growth, just a little bit slower, but still possible.
重新开始永远不会太晚。
It's never too late to start again.
寻找真爱永远不会太晚。
It's never too late to find love.
开始一份你真正热爱的事业永远不会太晚。
It's never too late to start a career you actually enjoy.
重返校园或学习你一直想掌握的技能永远不会太晚。
It's never too late to go back to school or learn a skill you always wanted.
掌控自己的健康永远不会太晚，无论你过去有什么习惯。
It's never too late to take control of your health, no matter your past habits.
修复对你重要的关系永远不会太晚。
It's never too late to repair a relationship that matters to you.
开始储蓄、投资或更明智地理财永远不会太晚。
It's never too late to start saving, investing or getting smarter with money.
当你构建的生活不再适合时，改变方向永远不会太晚。
It's never too late to change directions when the life you built doesn't fit anymore.
也许你正想着：我已经老得无法快乐了。
And maybe your thought is I'm getting too old to be happy.
幸福的巅峰其实比你想象中来得更晚。
Happiness actually peaks later than you think.
很多人说'我怀念过去的好时光'，其实他们真正怀念的是大学时光。
A lot of people say I miss the good old days and what they mean is I miss being at college.
但真相是这样的。
Now here's the truth.
如果你刚大学毕业，我向你保证那不必是你人生中最好的年华。
If you just graduated college, I promise you that does not have to be your best years.
如果你十年前大学毕业，我向你保证，那也不必是你人生中最好的年华。
If you graduated college ten years ago, I promise you, those do not have to be your best years.
想象一下余生都认为大学才是自己最美好的时光。
Imagine living the rest of your life and thinking college were my best years.
我向你保证，只要你愿意，每个十年都可以比上一个更精彩。
I promise you, every decade can get better than the last if you want it to.
只要你愿意，每个十年都可以更加充实。
Every decade can be more fulfilling if you want it to.
大学时光绝不应该是你人生中最美好的岁月。
College should never be your best years.
它们可以是精彩的、有趣的时光，但绝不该是你最好的岁月。
They should be great years, fun years, but never your best years.
大规模研究发现幸福感遵循U型曲线规律。
Large scale studies found that happiness follows a U shaped curve.
生活满意度在40多岁时会下降，然后在50岁及以后重新攀升至顶峰。
Life satisfaction dips in the 40s, then rises again peaking in the 50s and beyond.
这里有个原则：你可能还未迎来人生最幸福的阶段。
Here's the principle: You may not even have hit your happiest years yet.
你怎么可能错过自己的人生巅峰？
How can you be late to your own peak?
基于对超过34万美国人的大规模调查，参与者对日常情绪和整体生活评价进行了评分。
Based on large scale surveys of more than 340,000 Americans, participants rated daily emotions and overall life evaluation.
研究发现：20多岁的青年时期，人们乐观度和兴奋度较高，但同时压力、焦虑和攀比心理也更严重。
What they found was this: early adulthood, 20, higher optimism, excitement, but also higher stress, anxiety, and comparison pressure.
40多岁的中年阶段，生活满意度跌至低谷，常被称为中年危机或低谷期。
Midlife 40s, life satisfaction hits a low point, often called the midlife crisis or slump.
这与同时应对工作、子女、经济压力、年迈父母和未实现的期望有关。
This is linked to juggling work, kids, money, pressures, aging parents, and unfulfilled expectations.
50岁以后的晚年阶段，生活满意度开始回升，往往比青年时期更高。
Later life 50s plus, life satisfaction begins to climb again, often higher than in early adulthood.
人们报告感受到更多感恩、满足和情绪稳定。
People report more gratitude, contentment, and emotional stability.
幸福感往往在五十多岁、六十多岁、七十多岁时持续上升，具体取决于健康状况和社会支持。
Happiness tends to rise through the fifty's, sixty's, seventy's depending on health and social support.
原因如下。
And here's why.
人到中年时，人们会重新调整期望，不再以不切实际的目标作为衡量标准。
By midlife, people recalibrate expectations and stop measuring against unrealistic goals.
年长者在情绪稳定性上得分更高，因为他们的情绪波动更少，愤怒和嫉妒心也相对减弱。
Older adults score higher on emotional stability because there are fewer mood swings, less anger, less envy in comparison.
研究表明，年长者更重视时间、人际关系和意义，而非地位或攀比。
Studies show how older adults value time, relationships, meaning more than status or comparison.
他们专注于数量更少但更深层次的关系。
They focus on fewer but deeper relationships.
所以如果你40岁并感到落后，科学表明你正处于人生曲线的自然低谷期。
So if you're 40 and feeling behind, science suggests you're in the natural dip of the curve.
没有破碎，也没有迟到。
Not broken, not late.
从统计数据来看，情况会变得更好。
Statistically things get better.
幸福感的反弹意味着你五六十岁时可能比二十多岁时更加满足。
The happiness rebound means your 50s and 60s may bring more contentment than your 20s ever did.
幸福并非提前预支的。
Happiness isn't front loaded.
它是U型的。
It's U shaped.
如果你正处于低谷，数据显示你正在向高峰攀登。
If you're in the valley, the data says you're climbing toward a peak.
我希望这个答案能帮助你思考你脑海中浮现的一些想法。
I hope that that answers helps you think about some of the thoughts that are going on your mind.
我希望你能利用这一集来打破那种思维模式。
I hope you use this episode as a way to interrupt that pattern.
这些想法只是模式而已。
These thoughts are just patterns.
我不够好。
I'm not good enough.
我落后了。
I'm behind.
我迟到了。
I'm late.
我还没结婚。
I'm not married yet.
我还没找到对的人。
I haven't found my person.
这些都只是模式。
They're just patterns.
是你不断重复的模式。
Patterns that you've repeated.
本期内容就是要打破这种模式。
This episode is about breaking that pattern.
反复听，直到你意识到自己的时间线没有问题。
Listen to it again and again and again until you realize that your timeline is fine.
你的手表走得很准。
Your watch is working.
你的时钟是准确的。
Your clock is accurate.
当你专注于当下拥有的时间，你将创造出一个精彩的未来。
And when you're present with the time you have, you'll create an amazing future.
感谢收听。
Thanks for listening.
请务必订阅，并与朋友分享本期内容。
Make sure you subscribe, share this with a friend.
请记住，我永远站在你这边。
And remember, I'm forever in your corner.
我会一直为你加油。
And I'm always rooting for you.
非常感谢你收听这次对话。
Thank you so much for listening to this conversation.
如果你喜欢本期内容，你一定会爱上我与亚当·格兰特关于'不适感是成长关键'的对话，以及解锁你隐藏潜能的策略。
If you enjoyed it, you'll love my chat with Adam Grant on why discomfort is the key to growth and the strategies for unlocking your hidden potential.
如果你希望今年突破自我、成就更多，现在就立即去收听吧。
If you know you want to be more and achieve more this year, go check it out right now.
你今天设定了一个目标。
You set a goal today.
六个月后你实现了它。
You achieve it in six months.
当它实现时，你几乎只是感到解脱。
And then by the time it happens, it's almost a relief.
没有意义感和目的感。
There's no sense of meaning and purpose.
你某种程度上预料到了这个结果，如果它没实现你反而会失望。
You sort of expected it, and you would have been disappointed if it didn't happen.
我是阿诺·奥尔蒂斯。
It's Ano Ortiz.
我是马克·因德利卡多。
And I'm Mark Indelicado.
你可能知道
You might know
我们是希尔达
us as Hilda
和贾斯汀。
And Justin.
来自《丑女贝蒂》。
From Ugly Betty.
欢迎收听我们的新播客《万岁贝蒂》。
Welcome to our new podcast, Viva Betty.
耶。
Yay.
我们将从头到尾重温这部剧集。
We're rewatching the series from start to finish.
并采访标志性嘉宾，比如贝蒂本人——亚美莉卡·费雷拉。
And talking to iconic guests like Betty herself, America Ferrera.
当眼镜戴上的那一刻，我们就知道——这就是我们的贝蒂。
There was this moment when the glasses went on and it was like, this is our Betty.
请在iHeartRadio应用、Apple播客或您获取播客的任何平台收听《Viva Betty》。
Listen to Viva Betty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
嗨。
Hi.
我是丹尼·夏皮罗。
I'm Danny Shapiro.
我们在车里时，《像一块滚石》这首歌响起，他说里面有句歌词是关于你母亲的。
We were in the car, like a rolling stone came on, and he said, there's a line in there about your mother.
我就问，什么？
And I said, what?
如果我感觉不被接纳，我会选择一个别人无法拥有的身份。
What I would do if I didn't feel like I was being accepted is choose an identity that other people can't have.
我知道半夜发生了些事，但我记不清具体发生了什么。
I knew something had happened to me in the middle of the night, but I couldn't hold on to what had happened.
这些只是我《家庭秘密》第十三季中部分感人而重要的故事。
These are just a few of the moving and important stories on my thirteenth season of Family Secrets.
在iHeartRadio应用、Apple播客或任何你获取播客的地方收听《家庭秘密》。
Listen to Family Secrets on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
这部剧在展现黑人家庭方面领先于时代，呈现了电视前所未见的方式。
The show was ahead of its time to represent a black family in ways that television hadn't shown before.
确实如此。
Exactly.
我是特尔玛·霍普金斯，也被称为瑞秋阿姨。
It's Telma Hopkins, also known as aunt Rachel.
我是凯莉·威廉姆斯，也就是劳拉·温斯洛。
And I'm Kelly Williams or Laura Winslow.
在我们的播客《欢迎来到这个家庭》中，与特尔玛
On our podcast, welcome to the family with Telma
和凯莉一起，我们将重温《家庭事务》的每一集。
and Kelly, we're rewatching every episode of family matters.
我们会分享制作这部剧的幕后故事。
We'll share behind the scenes stories about making the show.
是的。
Yeah.
我们还会邀请一些特别嘉宾来爆料些内幕。
We'll even bring in some special guests to spill some tea.
欢迎收听由塞尔玛和凯莉主持的《欢迎来到这个家庭》，可在iHeartRadio应用、Apple播客或任何你获取播客的平台收听。
Listen to welcome to the family with Thelma and Kelly on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
这是iHeart播客《人类保证》。
This is an iHeart podcast, Guaranteed Human.
关于 Bayt 播客
Bayt 提供中文+原文双语音频和字幕，帮助你打破语言障碍，轻松听懂全球优质播客。