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柠檬水。
Lemonada.
嘿，大人们。
Hey, grown ups.
我是李。
Lee here.
我们非常激动能带着第八季回归。
We are so excited to return with season eight.
但在节目开始前，我想花一分钟时间，请求大家帮助我们一起完成这一季。
But first, I'd like to take just a minute here before the episode starts to ask for your help with finishing the season.
首先，有个好消息。
First, some good news.
本季我们与名为柠檬水媒体的新网络平台合作，他们为节目注入了新鲜资源和活力。
We've joined forces with a new network this season called Lemonada Media, and they're bringing fresh resources and energy to the show.
我们对他们的支持感到无比欣喜。
We're so thrilled for their support.
同时也很感谢所有收听节目的创作者俱乐部会员。
We're also grateful for all of you listening that are members of Creator Club.
你们的支持对我们至关重要，尤其是在当下。
Your support means the world to us, especially right now.
如果你还不是会员，我们同样感谢你的收听，欢迎我们进入你的生活。
And if you're not a member yet, we're so grateful that you're here listening, welcoming us into your homes.
我们特别感激你们每年寄来的成千上万原创儿童故事。
And we're especially grateful for the tens of thousands of original kids stories that you send us every year.
现在说个不太好的消息。
Now the not so great news.
我们想诚实地告诉听众，当前对教育媒体提供商（包括像《故事海盗》这样的儿童家庭播客）来说确实是个非常艰难的时期。
We wanna be honest with our listeners that it is a really challenging time right now for educational media providers, including kids and family podcasts like Story Pirates.
过去几年间，尽管有数十万听众依赖儿童与家庭类节目，播客行业却几乎完全放弃了这一领域。
Over the past few years, the podcast industry has turned almost entirely away from kids and family programming despite the fact that hundreds of thousands of listeners rely on it.
我们知道你们需要它，因为你们亲口告诉过我们。
And we know you rely on it because you tell us.
你们告诉我们，故事海盗如何让每天的上学路更有趣，让长途旅行更易忍受，或让睡前时光更安宁。
You tell us how story pirates helped make driving to school every day more fun, a long road trip more bearable, or bedtime more peaceful.
而且这一切都不需要屏幕。
And all of it is screen free.
如果你曾听过我们节目的片尾名单，就知道有许多人在为此工作。
If you've ever listened to the credits for our show, you know that a lot of people work on it.
有音乐团队为每集配乐、创作歌曲并制作歌曲。
There's the music team who scores every episode and writes the songs and produces the songs.
当然还有出色的演员、歌手、编剧、剪辑师等众多人员，他们每周至少努力制作一期节目。
There's, of course, the amazing actors, singers, writers, editors, and so many more people that work so hard to put this show out at least once a week.
但除非我们能筹集更多资金，否则这一季可能会遗憾地缩短。
But unless we're able to raise more funds, this season could unfortunately be a short one.
现在我们需要你们以新的方式伸出援手。
And right now we need your help in a new way.
因此我们首次推出个性化视频服务。
So we're offering for the first time personalized videos from us to you.
没错。
That's right.
只要捐款，我们就会为你、你的孩子或任何你认为会喜欢的人（多半是你的孩子）发送个性化视频，内容可以是问候、生日祝福、光明节快乐、圣诞快乐等等。
For your donation, we'll send you, your kids, whoever in your life that you think will appreciate it, probably your kids, a personalized video saying, hello, happy birthday, happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, whatever.
你可以选择由我、彼得、梅根、尼米尼、埃里克甚至罗洛录制的视频。
You can choose a video from me or Peter or Megan or Nimini or Eric or even Rolo.
这是我们唯一一次提供这种服务，短期内不会再次推出。
This is the only time we've ever offered this and we're not going to be offering it again anytime soon.
这就是你的机会。
So this is your chance.
为你生命中那个充满想象力的特别孩子获取一段视频，帮助故事海盗完成我们的季度。
Get a video for that special imaginative kid in your life and help the story pirates finish our season.
如果你听到这些且恰好有更多资源可以支持，我们正在寻找一两位大赞助人，或许有兴趣与我们洽谈成为节目的署名制片人。
And if you're hearing all of this and you happen to have more significant resources to spare, we're looking for one or two larger patrons who may wanna have a conversation with us about becoming credited producers on the show.
若你对此感兴趣，请给我们留言。
If that sounds like you, drop us a line.
你可以立即行动，今天就在storypirates.com/support获取专属定制视频。
You can do that and get your own personalized video today @storypirates.comslashsupport.
该链接也附在今天这期节目的备注中。
That link is also in the show notes for today's episode.
好的。
Okay.
感谢收听，再次感谢你们的支持。
Thanks for listening, and thanks again for all your support.
这对我们而言意义重大。
It really does mean the world to us.
在给大人们再说几句后，节目继续。
Onto the show after a few more words for the grown ups.
尼米尼？
Nimini?
我给尼米尼点了一杯三份半小杯玛奇朵，配菜是斑豆。
I got a triple half calf macchiato with a side of pinto beans for Nimini.
就在这里，罗洛。
Right here, Rolo.
抱歉久等了。
Sorry for the wait.
我今天有点忙得不可开交。
I'm a little swamped today.
是啊，豆子大卖场生意火爆。
Yeah, the bean emporium is hopping.
我从没见过这么忙的时候。
I've never seen it so busy.
嗯，你知道人们常说的在公海航行时对豆子饮食的强烈渴望吧。
Well, you know what they say about sailing on the open ocean and having a strong desire to eat and drink beans.
不知道。
No.
我也不知道。
Me neither.
我还指望你知道呢。
I was hoping you did.
总之，我在海盗船上经营生意遇到了严重的人手问题。
Anyway, I'm having real staffing issues running a business on a pirate ship.
我所有的员工都经常不来上班。
All of my employees keep not showing up for their shifts.
你说所有员工，是指我们这些故事里的其他海盗吗？
By all your employees, do you mean us the rest of the story pirates?
我就是这个意思。
I do.
对。
Yeah.
抱歉。
Sorry.
嘿，尼米尼。
Hey, Niminy.
嘿，罗洛。
Hey, Rolo.
哇哦。
Woah.
李，你拿的那一大摞纸是什么？
Lee, what's that humongous stack of papers you're carrying?
哦，这个吗？
Oh, this?
只是我们的邮件而已。
It's just our mail.
我们收到很多邮件。
We get a lot of it.
处理这些邮件是我晨间例行工作的重要部分，而且必须等我喝完晨间咖啡才能开始。
Going through it all is a big part of my morning routine, which I can't do until I've had my morning coffee.
老样子吗？
The usual?
猜猜看，罗拉，一大杯咖啡基弗。
Guess, Rola, one large coffee keefer.
不要咖啡。
Hold the coffee.
好吧。
Alright.
让我看看。
Let's see.
账单、账单、账单、账单，还有成千上万孩子们写的精彩故事。
Bills, bills, bills, bills, tens of thousands of incredible stories written by kids.
账单、账单、账单。
Bills, bills, bills.
嘿，这是什么？
Hey, what's this?
那是个精致的信封。
That's a fancy envelope.
你的咖啡，李。
Here's your coffee, Lee.
谢谢，罗洛。
Thank you, Rolo.
嘿，李，你今天不是应该在豆子和粥店上班吗——那些全直接泼我脸上了。
Hey, Lee, weren't you on schedule to work today at the bean and por- All of that went directly in my face.
看。
Look.
这是什么？
What is it?
我们受邀成为StorytellerCon的主题演讲嘉宾。
We've been invited to be the keynote speakers at StorytellerCon.
什么会？
At what?
StorytellerCon。
StorytellerCon.
这可是故事史上最具声望的讲故事者盛会。
It's only the most prestigious event for storytellers in the history of stories.
所有讲故事领域的重大时刻都发生在这里。
It's where all the biggest moments in storytelling have happened.
荷马首次公开《奥德赛》的另类结局，格林兄弟在自由式说唱对决中击败安徒生，《凛冬的寒风》四年前曾在这里秘密发布。
Homer first unveiled his alternate ending to The Odyssey, the Brothers Grimm defeated Hans Christian Andersen in a freestyle rap battle, and Where the Winds of Winter was secretly released four years ago.
天啊。
Oh, man.
李，听起来太棒了。
Lee, that sounds great.
为什么你对此似乎很沮丧？
Why do you seem so sad about it?
因为我一直想去参加StorytellerCon大会，但我们永远去不了。
Because I've always wanted to go to StorytellerCon, but of course, we never can.
为什么不行？
Why not?
因为尼米尼，虽然我们探索过海洋、天空甚至太空，但这个活动在全宇宙唯一我们飞船无法到达的地方——陆地。
Because, Nimini, while we've explored the ocean, the sky, even space and beyond, this event is in the one place in the entire universe that we can't drive our ship, land.
我一直觉得自己很有杰克·凯鲁亚克的那种气质。
Always thought I had some strong Jack Kerouac energy.
我最大的梦想就是征服开阔的公路，但这不可能实现。
My greatest dream is to tackle the open road, but it's impossible.
什么？
What?
你知道我在第二季就给飞船装了轮子对吧？
Well, you know I installed wheels on the ship all the way back in season two, right?
你做了什么？
You did what?
我只需要把飞船切换到正确的模式就行。
All I have to do is switch the ship to the right mode.
什么是正确模式？
What's the right mode?
它叫'公路旅行'模式。
It's called road trip.
没错。
Yes.
它
It
让我内心充满喜悦。
just filled me up with joy.
我妈妈很喜欢这些笑话。
My mom loves the jokes.
哟。
Yo.
哟。
Yo.
抹茶。
Matcha.
这让我对自己的写作感到非常自豪。
It made me very proud about my writing.
是啊。
Yeah.
我们正在深入探讨，可以说是哲学层面的东西。
We're just getting, like, really deep into, like, I wanna say philosophy.
我现在绝对认为自己能更有创造力。
I definitely think I can be more creative now.
我是冠军。
I'm a champion.
佐利海盗。
The Zoli Pirates.
欢迎大家回到故事海盗播客。
Welcome back to the story pirates podcast, everyone.
在这里我们会演绎孩子们写的故事。
Where we take stories written by kids.
把它们改编成喜剧小品。
And turn them into sketch comedy.
还有歌曲。
And songs.
好吧，海盗们。
Alright, pirates.
听好了。
Listen up.
你们都知道我为什么把大家召集到这里。
You all know why I've gathered you here.
我还以为这是豆类专卖店的员工会议。
I thought this was a bean emporium staff meeting.
在李接手之前确实是。
It was before Lee took it over.
罗洛，为此我要感谢你。
And I thank you for that, Rolo.
大家都知道，我们在旅程中去过很多地方。
Now, as you know, we've been to a lot of places on our journeys.
我们探索过公海、天空、外太空、海洋深处和地核。
We've explored the high seas, the skies, outer space, the ocean depths, the earth's core.
我们甚至去过纽约市。
We've even been to New York City.
但我们将要开始最奇特的旅程——一次公路旅行。
But we're about to embark on our strangest journey yet, a road trip.
哦。
Oh.
听起来像是我的
That sounds like my
天啊。
god.
小种子。
Little seed.
但Storyteller大会是个高雅的活动，而我们的飞船一团糟。
But Storyteller Con is a classy event, and our ship is a mess.
我们不能这样开到会议中心去。
We can't drive up to the convention center looking like this.
所以我觉得需要来次春季大扫除。
So I think a little spring cleaning is in order.
非做不可吗？
Do we gotta?
是的，瑞秋。
Yes, Rachel.
我们非做不可。
We do gotta.
说真的，我们八年没倒过垃圾了。
We literally haven't taken the trash out in eight years.
有道理。
Fair point.
开始干活吧。
Let's get to it.
趁这机会，我们来讲第一个故事。
And while that's happening, let's do our first story.
听众们，关于第一个故事我有件非常激动人心的事要分享。
And listeners, I have something very exciting to share about this first story.
本季我们将改编部分来自StoryQuest项目的故事，这是我们全新的全数字化校园创意写作项目。
This season, some of the stories we are adapting are from our StoryQuest program, which is our brand new, completely digital creative writing program for schools.
但最酷的部分来了。
But here's the cool part.
我们的非营利机构'故事海盗变革者'，让StoryQuest课程变得对各地学校都经济实惠。
Our nonprofit arm, Story Pirates Changemakers, helps make StoryQuest affordable to schools anywhere.
一些第一类学校甚至能免费获得这个项目。
And some Title I schools even get the program for free.
你们猜怎么着？
And guess what?
今天的第一篇故事就来自其中一所学校的杰出小作家。
Today's first story comes from an incredible author at one of those schools.
现在有请他们来介绍自己的故事。
Here they are to introduce their story.
嗨。
Hi.
我叫贝瑟妮。
My name is Bethany.
我九岁了，住在纽约。
I'm nine years old, I live in New York.
这是我的故事《床》。
This is my story, The Bed.
本特利医生是位儿科医师
Doctor Bentley's a pediatrician
帮助孩子们康复是我的使命
Helping kids feel better is my mission
无论是在诊所还是远程诊疗 随着病人越来越多 上周候诊队伍排到了门外 医生打着哈欠说道
At the office clinic or through telehealth With patients coming more and more Last week the line went out the door The doctor started yawning and said
自言自语道
to himself,
我真是累坏了。
I'm feeling really beat.
我得让双脚歇歇。
Gotta get off both my feet.
我需要让脑袋休息。
I need to rest my head.
所以我说这位医生需要张床。
So I said this doctor needs a bed.
床在哪里？
Where's the bed?
我来给医生铺床。
I'll bed for the doctor.
某种床。
Kind of bed.
我来给医生铺床。
I'll bed for the doctor.
床在哪里？
Where's the bed?
我来给医生铺床。
I'll bed for the doctor.
医生困了。
The doctor is sleepy.
嘿，医生。
Hey, doctor.
试试这台X光机。
Try this x-ray machine.
它很舒适而且非常干净。
It's cozy and it's very clean.
但是医生，我们能看到你的骨头。
But, doctor, we can see your bones.
那张床不太好。
That's not a good bed.
嘿，医生。
Hey, doc.
这里有台核磁共振仪。
Here's an MRI machine.
这里很安静，非常宁静。
It's quiet here and so serene.
没关系。
Never mind.
医生休息室里的沙发太小了。
The couch that's in the doctor's lounge is way too small.
轮椅会滑动，所以根本不行。
And wheelchairs roll, so that won't work at all.
这里没有床，所以我要消失了。
There's no bed here, and so I'll disappear.
我想我还是回家吧。
I guess I'll just go home.
啊，甜蜜的家。
Ah, home sweet home.
但还是没有等等。
But still no sign of a Wait a second.
我房间里有张床。
I have bed here in my room.
一张完美的床，适合
A bed that's perfect for a
有一张床。
There's a bed.
给医生准备的床。
A bed for the doctor.
一张大号双人床。
A queen-size bed.
这对医生来说正合适。
That's right for the doctor.
在那张床上。
And on that bed.
床。
Bed.
你把我吵醒了。
You woke me up.
哎呀。
Oops.
医生刚才在睡觉。
The doctor was sleeping.
嘿，李。
Hey, Lee.
我有所有想处理掉的东西。
I have all my stuff I wanna get rid of.
我该放哪儿？
Where should I put it?
很好，埃里克。
Very good, Eric.
到这边甲板上来，你会看到我分了四堆：垃圾、保留、捐赠和回收。
Over here on the deck, you'll see that I've made four piles, trash, keep, donate, and recycle.
哇哦。
Woah.
回收堆里怎么这么多机器设备？
What's with all the machinery in the recycle pile?
哦，妮米妮刚才来过。
Oh, Nimini was here earlier.
我想她是因为自己的发明总给我们惹麻烦而感到内疚，所以决定来个大扫除。
I think she feels bad that all her inventions keep getting us into trouble, so she decided to clean house.
什么？
What?
她的发明什么时候给我们惹过麻烦？
When have her inventions ever gotten us into trouble?
嗯，让我想想。
Well, let's see.
她的万能机器在上季意外让成千上万个角色活了过来。
Her anything machine accidentally brought thousands of characters to life last season.
她把彼得变成了鹅，虽然我还挺喜欢那样的。
She turned Peter into a goose, although I kinda like that.
无限立方体差点用自我复制的物品把我们所有人都淹没了。
The infinity cube almost drowned us all in self duplicating objects.
模拟室让我以为自己是个国王。
The Simul room made me think that I was a king.
模拟室？
The Simul room?
第三季的时候你还没
Season three, you weren't
来呢。
here yet.
我是不是永远都摆脱不了新人的身份了？
Am I ever not gonna be the new guy?
大概不会。
Probably not.
关键是，那些东西随处乱放不安全。
The point is, it's not safe to have all that stuff lying around.
我想是吧。
I guess.
不管怎样，这些是我要处理掉的东西。
Anyway, here's what I'm getting rid of.
我的第二条冲浪短裤，还有《愤怒与速度》DVD合集。
My second pair of board shorts and my swift and irritated DVD collection.
但那些是你最爱的电影啊。
But those are your favorite movies.
而且这并不容易
And it isn't easy to
放手。
let them go.
但我还有它们的流媒体版、镭射碟版、Betamax版和原始胶片版。
But I still have them on streaming, and Laserdisc, and Betamax, and the original film reels.
我带着我的东西来了。
I'm here with my stuff.
嘿，彼得。
Hey, Peter.
你有什么收获？
What do you got?
我有四万八千个迷你酸奶空盒。
I have 48,000 empty mini yogurt containers.
哇。
Wow.
还有一桶48000液盎司的酸奶。
And a vat of 48,000 fluid ounces of yogurt.
我该问吗？
Should I even ask?
最好别问。
Probably not.
因为我不记得了。
Because I do not remember.
捐赠还是
Donate or
扔掉。
Trash.
明白了。
Got it.
这是我的东西。
Here's my stuff.
你好啊。
Howdy.
你好。
Hello.
你好。（法语）
Bonjour.
瑞秋，其他这些瑞秋都是从哪来的？
Rachel, where did all these other Rachel's come from?
他们都来自瑞秋星球。
They're all from Planet Rachel.
我都忘了还有这些东西。
I forgot I even had them.
去吧，瑞秋的。
Go, Rachel's.
自由了。
Be free.
我们自由了。
We're free.
它们
Where
要去哪里？
are they going?
我们还在海上呢。
We're still on the ocean.
最好别问这些问题。
Better not to ask questions.
好吧。
Okay.
西格弗里德。
Sigfried.
我带来了强大的塔恩盔，这是我在斩杀巨龙法夫纳时获得的强大头盔。
I have brought the mighty Tarnhelm, a helmet of great power that I won when I slew the dragon Fafnir.
佩戴者能获得隐身的能力。
It grants its wearer the power of invisibility.
你为什么要丢掉它？
Why would you get rid of that?
每次我戴上它，就真的找不到自己了。
Every time I put it on, I literally can't find myself.
从隐喻意义上也是。
Metaphorically too.
存在主义的恐惧真的让人兴致全无。
The existential dread really takes the fun out of it.
嘿，李。
Hey, Lee.
有堆肥堆吗？
Is there a compost pile?
小胡子宝宝，你房间里能有什么可堆肥的东西？
Baby with a mustache, what could you possibly have in your room that's compostable?
我有几瓶发霉的牛奶，一罐过期的有机胡须蜡，还有这个，五个季节的脏尿布。
I have a few moldy bottles of milk, a tub of expired organic mustache wax, and this, five seasons worth of dirty diapers.
这就是为什么整艘船闻起来像
Is that why the whole ship smells like
如此美妙。
So good.
不客气。
You're welcome.
我也在这里。
I'm here as well.
哦，梅根，你吓到我了。
Oh, Megan, you startled me.
抱歉。
Sorry.
我不太习惯你这么... 你知道，悄无声息地进房间？
I'm not used to you entering a room so, you know, subtly?
是的。
Yes.
因为通常来说，我有点过分。
Because normally, I'm a bit much.
我来这里是为了丢弃无用的物品，包括这张我把自己P进去的凯莉·库恩签名照。
I'm here to discard my useless possessions, including this, a signed headshot of Carrie Coons that I photoshopped myself into.
但是梅根，那是你最喜欢的照片。
But, Megan, that's your favorite picture.
这张是我独角戏《六十秒小姐》的节目单，我在剧中全程以尼古拉斯·凯吉的造型演绎《六十秒小姐》。
This playbill from my one woman show, miss Psy gone in sixty seconds, in which I performed all of miss Psy gone in sixty seconds as Nicolas Cage.
但那明明是你最出色的作品。
But that was the best thing you've ever done.
最后是这个，我坚持用来签名的超大羽毛笔——尽管根本没人向我要签名。
And finally, this, My dramatically large quill that I insist on using to give autographs that no one's asked me for.
好吧。
Okay.
肯定有什么不对劲。
Something is definitely not right.
梅根绝不会放弃她的羽毛笔。
Megan would never part with her quill.
梅根，你到底怎么了？
Megan, what is wrong with you?
没什么。
Nothing.
我...我在上面？
I'm I'm Up here?
（倒吸一口气）
Gasp.
是穿着彼得潘戏服的梅根在吊桶里吗？
It's Megan up in the bucket thingy and a Peter Pan costume?
啊，完美落地。
Ah, stuck the landing.
哇哦。
Woah.
她刚刚从船帆上荡下来100英尺。
She just swung down 100 feet from the sails.
好吧。
Okay.
这才叫梅根的登场方式。
Now that is a Megan entrance.
因为我才是真正的梅根。
Because I'm the real Megan.
梅根，你为什么穿成这样？
Megan, why were you all dressed up like that?
过去八年里我每天下午都穿着这身戏服守在上面，就等着机会来这么个登场。
I've spent every afternoon for the past eight years up there in this costume just waiting for an opportunity to make that very entrance.
这么说就有点煞风景了。
That sort of ruins it.
真幽默。
Funny.
当初你从她的生日蛋糕里跳出来时，吉恩·斯玛特也是这么对我说的。
That's what Jean Smart said to me When you jumped out of her birthday cake.
话说，你不是我，但怎么对我这么了解？
Say, you're not me, but how do you know so much about me?
解释清楚。
Explain yourself.
我来解释。
I'll explain.
是我们。
It's it's us.
这
The
邪恶机器人故事海盗。
evil robot story pirates.
天啊。
Gasp.
稍事休息后我们马上回来，先给大人们说几句话。
We'll be right back after a few words for the grown ups.
嘿，大人们。
Hey, grown ups.
我是Lee。
Lee here.
如果你的家人喜欢故事海盗，那我猜你也希望生活中的孩子们热爱阅读和写作。
If your family loves story pirates, then I'm guessing that you are also interested in the kids in your life loving to read and write.
知道我要给你推荐什么吗？
Well, have I got something for you?
来认识一下
Meet Mrs.
Wordsmith女士，这个获奖创作团队让词汇学习变得超级有趣。
Wordsmith, the award winning creators who make vocabulary learning ridiculously fun.
我对Wordsmith女士创作的一切都着迷不已。
I am so obsessed with everything that Mrs.
Wordsmith制作的东西。
Wordsmith makes.
快来看看吧。
Check it out.
首先登场的是《单词标签》，这款电子游戏能提升孩子的词汇量并培养阅读理解能力。
First up, Word Tag, a video game to boost your child's vocabulary and build reading comprehension.
内含专业设计的任务和小游戏，玩家一年可学习多达1500个新单词。
Packed with expertly designed missions and mini games, players learn up to 1,500 new words a year.
甚至还附带退款保证。
And it even comes with a money back guarantee.
你在开玩笑吗？
Are you kidding me?
接下来，你可以在厨房餐桌上放一本《每日一词》翻页书，每天翻开一个新的描述性词汇，包含同义词和故事开头提示。
Next, you can pop a storytellers word a day flip top book on your kitchen table and flip a new descriptive word every day complete with synonyms and story starters.
早餐烹饪时闲聊词汇的完美选择。
Perfect for chatting vocabulary while breakfast is cooking.
如果可以的话，请给我留些培根。
And if you can, please save me some bacon.
游戏之夜可以拿出《词汇大师》。
On game night, you can break out vocabularius.
一盒包含三款趣味卡牌游戏，让词汇练习变成家庭竞技活动。
With three hilarious card games in one box, vocab practice becomes a competitive family event.
如果你邀请我来玩，我保证会手下留情。
And I promise to go easy on you if you invite me over to play.
最棒的是，有抱负的小故事海盗们会爱上《如何写故事》这本练习册，它提供了创作引人入胜故事所需的一切。
Best of all, budding story pirates will love how to write a story, a workbook that gives kids everything they need to craft captivating tales.
包含易于遵循的带插图故事结构规划图和情节构建指导。
It includes easy to follow illustrated story graph planners and guidance on structuring plots.
展开剩余字幕（还有 480 条）
这是帮助孩子真正写出他们构思已久故事的最佳方式。
It's the perfect way to help your kids actually write that story that they've been thinking about for a long time.
无论是书籍、卡牌游戏还是应用程序，Mrs.
Whether it's books, card games or apps, Mrs.
Wordsmith将学习变成游戏。
Wordsmith turns learning into play.
立即访问mrswordsmith.com/storypirates，使用优惠码PIRATE享受专属折扣。
So set sail for mrswordsmith.com/storypirates and use code PIRATE for an exclusive discount.
网址是mrswordsmith.com/storypirates。
That's mrswordsmith.com/storypirates.
解锁文字的力量，见证孩子想象力的翱翔。
Unlock the power of words and watch your child's imagination soar.
谁知道呢？
And who knows?
或许他们会成为下一位故事海盗。
It may lead them to becoming the next story pirate.
邪恶机器人故事海盗？
The evil robot story pirates?
什么？
What?
谁？
Who?
为什么？
Why?
怎么做到的？
How?
什么时候？
When?
我们是全新升级版的故事海盗。
We are the new and improved story pirates.
我们被设计得比你们更优秀——高效、理性且守时。
We were created to be better than you, efficient, logical, and on time.
我们将以最高效的方式进行自我介绍。
We will now introduce ourselves as efficiently as possible.
我是邪恶机器人李。
I am evil robot Lee.
我和李很像，但更有条理。
I'm just like Lee, but organized.
我很有条理。
I'm organized.
对吧，史密提？
Right, Smitty?
史密提？
Smitty?
哦，糟糕。
Oh, shoot.
我忘了邀请史密提。
I forgot to invite Smitty.
我是邪恶机器人尼米尼。
I am evil robot Nimini.
我和尼米尼很像，但没那么冲动。
I'm like Nimini, but less impulsive.
我不冲动。
I'm not impulsive.
哦，糟糕。
Oh, shoot.
我刚不小心发明并造出了手持黑洞发生器。
I just accidentally invented and built a handheld black hole generator.
哦，我把它丢进回收堆吧。
Oh, I'll add it to the recycle pile.
我是邪恶机器人，瑞秋。
I'm evil robot, Rachel.
我从不坐下。
I never sit.
但椅子。
But chairs.
那些美丽的椅子。
The beautiful chairs.
我是邪恶机器人，埃里克。
I'm evil robot, Eric.
我和埃里克一模一样。
I'm exactly like Eric.
只是为了更符合空气动力学，我剪掉了脏辫。
Except to be more aerodynamic, I cut off my dreadlocks.
你一点都不像我。
You're nothing like me.
我是邪恶机器人，彼得。
And I'm evil robot, Peter.
你确实很像我的样子。
You actually do seem a lot like me.
只是我不吃东西。
Except I do not eat.
这是个怪物。
It's a monster.
我不明白。
I don't understand.
谁会想要一个更可靠、高效、准时的我们版本？
Who would want a more reliable, efficient, on time version of us?
我们是不是有个被遗忘的宿敌什么的？
Do we have an old arch nemesis that we've forgotten about or something?
海豚妈妈啊，我都记不清当初是不是好聚好散了。
Mother porpoise, I can't remember if I left things on good terms or not.
罗洛那只老鹦鹉，噗奇？
Rolo's old parrot, Poochy?
毕加索·瑞秋？
Picasso Rachel?
查尔斯·奇普·查格利？
Charles Chip Chugly?
哇哦。
Wow.
这些可都是陈年旧账了。
These are some deep cuts.
不是。
No.
莫向敌人寻答案，因造物主就在你们中间。
Look not to your enemies for the answer, for our creator is amongst you.
你是说故事海盗里有人干的？
You mean one of the story pirates did this?
我不信。
I don't believe you.
这不可能是真的。
That can't be true.
恐怕是真的，瑞秋。
I'm afraid it is, Rachel.
罗？
Ro?
是的。
Yes.
是我创造了你们的复制体。
It was I who created duplicates of you all.
但为什么，罗洛？
But why, Rolo?
为什么？
Why?
因为你们都没来轮班工作。
Because none of you were showing up to your shifts to work.
我一直在独自经营豆子商场。
I've been running the bean emporium alone.
所以今早尼米尼把她的所有小玩意扔进回收堆时，我随机组合了一些来创造出会准时出现的你们。
So when Nimini dumped all her gadgets in the recycle pile this morning, I used a random combination of them to create versions of you that actually show up.
这有那么糟吗？
Is that so bad?
拜托。
Come on.
会没事的。
This is gonna be fine.
最坏能发生什么？
What's the worst that could happen?
在我们存在的二十分钟里，我们听完了故事海盗播客的全部往期内容，还做了笔记。
In the twenty minutes that we've been alive, we listen to the entirety of the Story Pirates podcast back catalog, and we have notes.
等等。
Wait.
但众所周知我们从不做笔记。
But we famously don't take notes.
我们知道。
We know.
而且我们知道你不会听我们说，你的播客被低效的荒谬内容拖累了。
And we know that you won't listen when we say that your podcast is bogged down by inefficient absurdities.
还有不必要的古怪行为。
And unnecessary wackiness.
以及那些对推进情节毫无帮助的笑话。
And jokes that do not further the blot.
你们觉得
Do you guys think
打喷嚏是不是就是有话要说的打嗝？
a sneeze is just a burp with more to say?
而且我们知道当我们告诉你关于孩子们写的故事的真相时，你不会听。
And we know that you will not listen when we tell you the truth about stories that are written by kids.
什么真相？
What truth?
就是它们太奇怪了。
That they are too weird.
卡斯帕，你怎么敢这样？
Casper, how dare you?
我们知道你无法改变，所以我们给自己下达了新指令。
We know that you cannot change, so we have given ourselves a new directive.
去经营豆子专卖店？
To staff the bean emporium?
不是。
No.
要在我们能产生最大影响的地方，诋毁你们那种讲故事的方式。
To discredit your brand of storytelling in the one place where we can have the greatest impact.
不。
No.
不是故事电话会议。
Not Story telecon.
是的。
Yes.
是的。
Yes.
哇。
Woah.
哇。
Woah.
哇。
Woah.
那是什么？
What was that?
我们搁浅了。
We've run aground.
我们到陆地了。
We've reached land.
来吧，邪恶的机器人。
Come evil robots.
让我们下船。
Let us disembark.
你们不会得逞的。
You won't get away with this.
我们很快就会再见面的，故事海盗们，在这条路的尽头，在讲故事大会上，喷气背包。
We will see you soon enough, story pirates, at the end of the road, at storyteller con, jet packs.
效率真高。
That was efficient.
我知道
I know
我们不吃东西，但可以
we don't eat, but can
我们还是要为六点停下来吗？
we still stop for six?
好的。
Okay.
为什么我感觉大家都会为此责怪我？
Why do I feel like everyone is gonna blame me for this?
因为我们确实会，罗洛，而且我们需要很长时间才能消气。
Because we are, Rolo, and it is going to take a whole lot for us to stop being mad at you.
请大家喝免费咖啡怎么样？
How about free coffee for everyone?
好耶。
Yay.
而且
And
再加一个故事。
also another story.
告诉我。
Tell me.
现在有请作者来介绍。
And here to introduce it is the author.
嗨。
Hi.
我是玛洛丽。
I'm Mallory.
我九岁了，住在弗吉尼亚州。
I'm nine years old, and I live in Virginia.
这是我的故事。
This is my story.
请勿打扰。
Do not disturb.
终于到周末了。
Finally, the weekend.
我刚放学回家，现在终于能独自待在我的房间里了。
I'm home from school and in the one place I can be alone, my room.
嘿，玛洛丽。
Hey, Mallory.
多萝西，我不是说过进我房间要先敲门吗？
Dorothy, what have I told you about coming to my room without knocking?
我不知道啊。
I don't know.
是要我敲门吗？
To do it?
是不要直接进来。
To not do it.
天啊。
Jeez.
你真烦人。
You are so annoying.
出去。
Get out.
好的。
Okay.
我就不能有点自己的时间吗？
Is it too much to have a little time to myself?
我不想这样，但我得做个牌子。
I don't wanna have to do this, but I'm making a sign.
请勿打扰（愤怒脸）。
Do not disturb angry face.
好了。
Okay.
我这就把它挂到门上，搞定。
I'll just take this to the door, and there.
现在终于能躺下放松了。
Now I can finally lay down and relax.
喂，
Hey,
马尔。
Mal.
你看到我的老花镜了吗？
Have you seen my reading glasses?
爸，你没看到我的牌子吗？
Dad, didn't you read my sign?
不戴眼镜我什么都看不清。
I can't read anything without my glasses.
爸，你的眼镜就在老地方，你自己头顶上。
Dad, your glasses are where they always are, on top of your head.
现在请出去。
Now get out.
哦。
Oh.
哦。
Oh.
哦。
Oh.
爸爸。
Dad.
哦，谢谢，亲爱的。
Oh, thanks, hon.
好的。
Okay.
现在该看书了。
Now time to read.
玛洛丽，这是你的衣服。
Mallory, here's your laundry.
妈妈，你到底想怎样？
Mom, what is your deal?
牌子上明明写着请勿打扰，所以你就别打扰。
The sign literally says do not disturb, so you do not disturb.
哦，那这是不是意味着你想开始自己洗衣服了？
Oh, so does that mean that you wanna start doing your own laundry?
当然不想。
Of course not.
我只是随便说说。
I just come on.
是啊。
Yeah.
我就知道是这样。
That's what I thought.
二十分钟后吃晚饭。
Dinner in twenty.
我真是烦死了。
I am so annoyed.
我得再做个告示牌把事情搞大点。
I'm gonna have to take this up a notch with another sign.
招聘保镖。
Bodyguards wanted.
有意者请于明日（8月29日）早上6点来我家面试。
If interested, show up at my house tomorrow, August 29 at 6AM.
但他们怎么知道我家在哪？
But how will they know where I live?
哦，我有办法了。
Oh, I got it.
我会穿着蓝色碎花睡衣上下蹦跳。
I will be jumping up and down in my blue flower PJs.
完美。
Perfect.
现在要把这些告示贴遍全镇。
Now to put these up all over town.
第二天早上6点。
It's the next day, 6AM.
该开始蹦蹦跳跳了。
Time to start jumping up and down.
嘿。
Hey.
嘿。
Hey.
嘿。
Hey.
这里是保镖职位的面试地点吗？
Is this where the interview for being a bodyguard is?
哦，是的。
Oh, yeah.
实际上是的。
It's actually Yeah.
别
Don't
知道在哪
know where
是的。
it Yes.
没错。
It is.
你好啊，想当保镖的家伙们。
Hello, wannabe bodyguards.
准备好迎接你们有史以来最棒的工作了吗？
Are you ready for the best job you've ever had?
守护我的房间免受家人打扰。
Guarding my room from my family.
哇哦。
Woo.
噢，不。
Oh, no.
那就是我们想雇的小孩吗？
That's the kid we're looking to work for?
她疯疯癫癫的。
She's bananas.
我听到了，我向你保证，我非常理智。
I heard that, and I assure you, I'm very sensible.
哦，是我的错。
Oh, my mistake.
现在排好队，轮到面试时，你可以爬梯子进我房间，或者用蹦床跳进窗户。
Now line up, and when it's your turn to be interviewed, you can either climb up that ladder to my room or jump in the window via the trampoline.
但为什么要
But why would
待会儿
See you
见。
in a minute.
我
I
成功了。
made it.
欢迎来到我的房间，一号保镖。
Welcome to my room, bodyguard number one.
请坐在这张婴儿椅上。
Please have a seat in this baby chair.
好的。
Okay.
现在告诉我，你为什么想当保镖？
Now tell me, why do you wanna be a bodyguard?
说实话，我需要
Well, frankly, I need to make
嘿，马洛里。
Hey, Mallory.
多萝西，你想要什么？
Dorothy, what do you want?
我不知道。
I don't know.
从我房间出去。
Get out of my room.
好吧。
Okay.
我对此非常抱歉。
I am so sorry about that.
你刚才说什么？
You were saying?
我想我对保镖工作的热情始于
I think my passion for bodyguarding began when I was
嘿，马儿。
Hey, Mal.
你看到我的手机充电器了吗？
Have you seen my phone charger?
爸爸，它就在你手里。
Dad, it's in your hand.
哦，
Oh,
爸爸。
dad.
天啊。
God.
你看到我要应付什么了吗？
You see what I have to deal with?
好的。
Okay.
你完蛋了。
You're done.
我得到这份工作了吗？
Did I get the job?
我看你经验丰富，还有一头蓝发，很酷。
I see you have a lot of experience, and you have blue hair, which is cool.
我会在三十分钟内给你回复。
I will get back to you in thirty minutes.
哦，好的。
Oh, okay.
谢谢。
Thanks.
我
I
现在从窗户跳出去。
Now jump out the window.
但我现在。
But I Now.
好的。
Okay.
蹦床。
Trampoline.
哇。
Woah.
哎哟。
Ow.
好的。
Okay.
下一个是谁？
Who's next?
马洛里。
Mallory.
妈妈。
Mom.
怎么了？
What is it?
别再让陌生人从窗户爬进来了。
No more letting strangers climb through your windows.
但是
But
还有，五分钟后吃早餐。
Also, breakfast in five.
我想我们只能把他们全雇了。
I guess we'll just have to hire them all.
嘿。
Hey.
想不想在草坪上当保镖？
Wanna be bodyguards out on the lawn?
你们都被雇用了。
You're all hired.
太好了。
Yay.
我正需要这个。
I needed this.
明天一早，天亮前到前面来见我。
Meet me out front tomorrow morning, bright and early.
保镖们，早上好。
Bodyguards, good morning.
早上好，老板。
Morning, boss.
我们已准备好开始守卫您的房间。
We're ready to start guarding your room.
任何东西都别想从我们这儿溜过去。
Nothing's gonna get past us.
特别是在我们安装完这个之后。
Especially after we install this.
哇哦。
Woah.
那是
Is that a
确实是。
It sure is.
我表姐昨晚用卡车送来的。
My cousin delivered it last night in her truck.
哦，你表姐是在机场工作还是怎么的？
Oh, does your cousin work for the airport or something?
什么？
What?
朱丽叶五个月大了。
Juliet is five months old.
那就太荒谬了。
That would be ridiculous.
等等。
Wait.
什么？
What?
我们开始
Let's get to
工作吧。
work.
我无聊死了。
I'm bored.
我想去看看玛洛丽在忙什么。
I guess I'll see what Mallory is up to.
她门口放着台机场安检机？
There's an airport security machine in front of her door?
我直接挪开它。
I'll just move it.
女士请立刻停下。
Hold it right there, ma'am.
您有预约吗？
Do you have an appointment?
见我亲妹妹还要预约？
To see my sister?
没有预约。
No appointment.
禁止入内。
No entry.
下一个。
Next.
打扰一下。
Excuse me.
这都是些什么？
What's all this?
我得把
I have to take
这些衣物送到马洛里的房间？
this laundry into Mallory's room?
这些衣物里有皮带、鞋子、液体或笔记本电脑吗？
Does this laundry contain any belts, shoes, liquids, laptops?
没有。
No.
把它放进灰色箱子里，然后通过机器传送。
Place it in a gray bin and send it through the machine.
外面怎么这么吵，保镖们？
What is all the noise out here, bodyguards?
这两个人试图进入，但我已经把他们赶走了。
These two were trying to gain entry, but I've turned them away.
干得好。
Excellent work.
如果有人找我，我会在自己房间里，恕不接待。
If anyone needs me, I'll be in my room, unavailable.
马洛里，我已经
Mallory, I've
终于搞定了，啦
got so much Finally, la
我成功了。
I've done it.
玛洛丽，你真是个天才。
Mallory, you're a genius.
哦，快看。
Oh, and look.
有东西从机器里传送过来了。
Something is coming through the machine.
可能是我的脏衣服？
My laundry perhaps?
它来了。
Here it comes.
是嘿，瓦莱丽。
It's Hey, Valerie.
多萝西，你怎么通过安保的？
Dorothy, how did you get past security?
我从机器里过来的。
I went through the machine.
我的鞋都脱了。
My shoes are off.
滚出我的房间。
Get out of my room.
嘿。
Hey.
玛尔。
Mal.
爸，你是想通过蹦床进我房间吗？
Dad, are you trying to get into my room via the trampoline?
哦，是啊。
Oh, yeah.
他们不让我从门进来。
They wouldn't let me through the door.
我要关窗了。
I'm closing the window.
现在，Dorothy，立刻离开我的房间。
Now, Dorothy, get out of my room right now.
小心。
Look out.
哇哦。
Woah.
爸。
Dad.
哦，天哪。
Oh, boy.
抱歉啊。
Sorry about that.
嘿，Mal。
Hey, Mal.
你看到我的社保卡了吗？
Have you seen my Social Security card?
你刚刚撞穿了我的窗户。
You just crashed through my window.
好吧。
Alright.
我受够了这个。
I'm sick of this.
女士，你
Ma'am, you
不能进去。
can't go in there.
哦，我不能进去？
Oh, I can't go in there?
进我女儿的房间也不行？
Into my daughter's room?
有本事就拦我试试。
Just try and stop me.
给我让开。
Out of my way.
妈妈生气了。
Mom's mad.
糟了。
Uh-oh.
马洛里，妈妈，你搞这么多安保措施，机场安检级别的，还雇保安，就为了躺你床上。
Mallory, mom, you got all the security, the airport thing, the security guards just to lay on your bed.
我需要空间不行吗？
I need the space?
我在...我在长身体。
I'm I'm growing.
你被禁足了，这就是你的现状。
You're grounded is what you are.
但五分钟后吃晚饭。
But Dinner in five.
谢谢，亲爱的。
Thanks, hon.
哈罗德，把玻璃收拾干净。
Harold, clean up this glass.
没问题。
You got it.
我只是
I just
觉得这太疯狂了。
thought it was bonanos.
噢，保镖们快起来。
Oh, get up bodyguards.
你没事的。
You're fine.
结束。
The end.
现在李将与作者对话。
And now Lee speaks with the author.
那么，马洛里，你写了'请勿打扰'。
So, Mallory, you wrote do not disturb.
是的。
Yes.
你是怎么想到这个故事的创意的？
How did you come up with the idea for that story?
今年夏天，我的老师问我妈妈是否想参加暑期写作俱乐部。
So over the summer, my teacher asked my mom if, I wanted to do summer writing club.
然后我说，好啊。
And I said, yes.
她问我最近都在哪里写作。
She asked me where I had been writing lately.
我说没写多少。
And I said, not much.
就写了这个'请勿打扰'的牌子。
Just this do not disturb sign.
这就是我构思出故事的由来。
And that's how I came up with my story.
你是说真的在自己房间写了个'请勿打扰'的牌子？
Like, you were writing a literal do not disturb sign for your own room?
对。
Yes.
我觉得你故事里她真的找来机场保安和保镖在门外站岗特别好笑，实际上这样反而会更吵吧。
I think it's funny that in your story, she actually gets airport security and bodyguards to work outside her door, which sounds like it would be pretty disruptive, actually.
这正是重点所在。
That's the point.
能再详细解释一下吗？
Can you explain that a little bit more?
这本来就是个搞笑故事。
It's supposed to be, like, a funny story.
就是要让角色们产生'你现在在搞什么名堂'的疑问。
So it's supposed to, like, make characters think, like, what are you doing now?
你懂的，这样反而会让人更烦躁。
You know, that's just gonna, like, disturb you more.
我想有时候我们越努力避免被打扰，这个问题反而会变得更严重。
I guess sometimes the harder we work to not be disturbed, the easier it is for that problem to get worse.
确实。
Yeah.
你喜欢家里有一个专属于你的空间吗？
Do you like having a place in your house that is just for you?
喜欢。
Yes.
我特别喜欢我的书桌区域，因为桌子是我最爱的颜色，还配有台灯和一些美术用品。
I love my desk area because my desk is my favorite color, and it has a light and some art supplies.
我也非常喜欢我的床。
And I really like my bed too.
感觉就像我的私人小岛，可以随心所欲。
Feels like my own private island where I can do whatever I want.
你会装饰自己的房间吗？
Do you decorate your room?
会啊。
Yeah.
每隔几年我就会重新布置一次。
Every few years, I, like, redo it.
几年前我重新装修时，选择了粉色花朵的主题风格。
A few years ago, I redid it, and I went with sort of, like, a pink flower theme.
你已经在考虑明年要怎么改造房间了吗？
Are you already thinking about how you wanna remodel next year?
对呀。
Yeah.
我父母说我明年就10岁了，可以让我自己选颜色粉刷卧室。
My parents say that since I'm turning 10 next year, they're gonna let me paint my bedroom whatever color I want.
哇。
Woah.
太棒了。
That's amazing.
你对那些想让自己房间变得特别、成为私人空间的孩子有什么建议吗？
Do you have any advice for any kids who are like, I wanna make my room special and feel like my own private space?
他们应该考虑自己最常使用的区域。
They should think about what areas they use the most.
如果不受预算限制，可以随心所欲设计的话，他们会想要在里面放些什么。
And if they could, like, design it any way they want, no budget, like, what they would want in there.
有时候我会问我父母，如果他们能拥有梦想中的房间，他们会放些什么进去？
Sometimes I, like, ask my parents, like, if they can have their dream room, what would they put in it?
然后我就帮他们画出来。
And then I draw it for them.
这个主意真棒。
That's a great idea.
能说说你父母梦想中的房间是什么样子的吗？
What are some examples of your parents' dream rooms?
我妈妈说她想在房间里放些植物、书和椅子。
My mom, she said she wants plants and books and chairs in her room.
我爸爸则想要一张画桌和一个电脑工作站，这样他就能叫上朋友一起玩《龙与地下城》。
And my dad, he has a painting table and, like, a computer station where he can call his friends, and they can play D and D together.
那你梦想中的房间呢？
And what about your dream room?
虽然现实中你可能没法把所有想要的东西都放进房间，但如果可以的话，你会放些什么？
You probably can't have every single thing that you want in your own room, but if you could, what would you have in there?
嗯，我特别喜欢猪和泰勒·斯威夫特。
Well, I really love pigs and Taylor Swift.
所以我会在墙上贴泰勒·斯威夫特的海报和一些小猪海报，铺上漂亮的地毯，放个大书桌区，还有张舒适的阁楼床。
So on the walls, I would, like, I would put, like, posters of Taylor Swift and some posters of pigs up on there and a nice carpet and a big desk area and a nice bed, nice loft bed.
泰勒·斯威夫特和小猪并排的画面想想就很有趣。
I love the image of Taylor Swift and pigs right next to each other.
我能想象那个场景。
I can picture that.
马洛里，你的故事太棒了。
Mallory, your story is so good.
非常感谢你让我们表演它。
Thank you so much for letting us perform it.
不客气。
You're welcome.
再见，马洛里。
Bye, Mallory.
再见。
Bye.
稍后回来时，我们将进入'故事之爱'环节，我和彼得会朗读更多孩子们创作的故事。
And when we come back, it's time for story love, where Peter and I read even more stories written by kids.
我们还邀请了特别嘉宾艾莉森·皮尔加入。
And we're joined by special guest, Alison Pill.
在插播几条给大人的广告后，我们马上回来。
We'll be back after a few words for the grown ups.
欢迎回到'故事之爱'，我们在这里朗读并讨论孩子们创作的故事。
Welcome back to Story Love, where we read stories written by kids, and we discuss them.
我和彼得在一起。
I'm here with Peter.
你好，彼得。
Hello, Peter.
你好，李。
Hello, Lee.
还有一位非常特别的嘉宾，我们节目的老朋友艾莉森·皮尔。
And a very special guest, long time friend of the show, Allison Pill.
嗨，艾莉森。
Hi, Allison.
你好。
Hello.
能来到这里我太开心了。
I'm so happy to be here.
让我们开始第一个故事吧。
Let's get into our first story.
艾莉森，能请你为我们朗读这第一个故事吗？
Allison, would you do us the honor of reading this first one?
我感到非常荣幸。
I would be so honored.
这个故事来自11岁的奥黛丽。
This story is by Audrey, who is 11.
她来自科罗拉多州。
She's from Colorado.
《与会说话的南瓜持不同意见的松鼠》
The squirrel that disagreed with talking pumpkins.
南瓜。
Pumpkins.
谁需要它们呢？
Who needs them?
人类，
Humans,
谁需要
who needs
它们？
them?
松鼠完全可以统治这个世界。
Squirrels could totally rule this world.
抱歉，我有点得意忘形了。
Sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself.
我叫艾娃，松鼠艾娃，我遇到了一个问题。
My name is Ava, Ava the Squirrel, And I have a problem.
那就是会说话的南瓜。
It's called talking pumpkins.
它们是可怕的怪物，嘲笑我们松鼠，因为过去在南瓜会说话之前我们常吃它们。
They are monstrosities who mock us squirrels because we used to eat pumpkins before they started talking.
你问这是怎么发生的？
How did it happen, you say?
嗯，有个人买了个南瓜，想让她女儿在生日时雕刻成杰克灯，但南瓜放得太久了。
Well, there was a human who bought a pumpkin for her daughter to carve into a jack o'-lantern for her daughter's birthday, but they left the pumpkin out too long.
它开始听懂人类说的话。
It started to hear words that the words the humans were saying.
后来它被放置得更久，南瓜就开始说话了。
Then it had been left out still too much longer, and the pumpkin started to talk.
人类吓坏了。
The humans were so scared.
他们带着它去杂货店询问。
They took it to the grocery store to ask.
但在店里，南瓜从他们怀里滚出来，教会了整个大杂货店里所有其他南瓜说话。
But at the store, the pumpkin rolled out of their arms and taught all the other pumpkins in the entire large grocery store how to talk.
然后南瓜们逃离杂货店，开始骚扰我们松鼠，因为我们过去常吃南瓜。
Then the pumpkins ran away from the grocery store and started annoying us squirrels because we used to eat pumpkins.
它们用难解的谜语折磨我们。
They made us miserable with hard riddles.
我最好的朋友詹姆斯，我最好的朋友詹姆斯遇到了一个几乎不可能解开的谜题。
My best friend James my best friend James got a practically impossible riddle.
是时候让这一切彻底
It's time that this stops once and
结束了。
for all.
松鼠同胞们，团结起来。
Fellow squirrels, come together.
我们必须齐心协力阻止这些会说话的南瓜威胁。
We have to bend together to stop these talking pumpkin menaces.
于是在那天晚上，我们告诉那些南瓜，适可而止了。
So that night, we told those pumpkins, enough is enough.
我们受够了这些难解的谜题。
We're so tired of these hard riddles.
我们受够了彼此间的愤怒。
We're so tired of us being mad at us.
受够了你们的嘲笑，也受够了你们让所有松鼠都感到沮丧。
So tired of you mocking us, and so tired of you frustrating all the squirrels.
我们不能做朋友吗？
Can't we be friends?
与其整天整夜地烦我们，南瓜让我们考虑考虑。
Instead of you annoying us all day and all night, let us think about it, the pumpkins told us.
好好想想吧。
Think about it.
噢，我真是烦透了。
Oh, how annoyed I am.
我是松鼠艾娃，我反对会说话的南瓜。
I am Ava the squirrel, and I disagree with talking pumpkins.
就在第二天，南瓜说，我们考虑后决定，当然可以。
The very next day, the pumpkin said, we thought about it and decided, sure.
鸡蛋。
The egg.
我是说，我是说
I mean, I mean
真的吗？
What a Really?
你真的
You really
给了松鼠艾娃一些生命力，在那段我
gave Ava the squirrel some life in that I
我喜欢任何以角色自言自语开场，然后注意到并转向观众的独白。
love any monologue that starts with a character, like, muttering to themself, and then noticing and addressing the audience.
是的。
Yes.
实际上这很有莎士比亚的风格。
It's very Shakespearean, actually.
不是吗？
Isn't it?
就像理查三世。
It's like Richard the third.
是的。
Yes.
嗯哼。
Mhmm.
我也喜欢人类的表现——这很合理，毕竟那是个出了岔子、放置过久的南瓜灯。
I also like that humans are and rightfully so given that it was a jack o'-lantern gone awry and left out too long.
所以他们确实应该承担部分责任。
They so they do deserve some of the blame.
但在那一刻，你只是觉得，等等。
But at the time, you're just like, wait.
什么？
What?
而我，而我爱
And I and I love
关于这一点。
that about it.
比如，人类做了什么？
Like, what did the humans do?
我最喜欢的场景其实是人类拿着会说话的南瓜灯问，我们该怎么办的画面。
My favorite scene actually is the image of the humans with a talking jack o'-lantern going, what do we do?
我们去向商店投诉吧。
Let's complain to the store.
于是他们带着南瓜灯进来了。
So they come in with their jack o'-lantern.
比如，打扰一下。
Like, excuse me.
然后，哇哦。
And then, woah.
然后它就从他们手里逃走了。
And then it gets away from them.
是啊。
Yeah.
还引发了一群南瓜的暴动。
And starts a mob of pumpkins.
说实话，这个故事里我最喜欢的部分就是人类（或南瓜们）用超难的谜语来烦人
So my other obviously, my other really favorite part of this story is that the humans are using or the pumpkins are using really hard riddles to annoy Out
突然冒出来
of nowhere.
毫无预兆地出现
Out of nowhere.
冒出来的
Come from.
老实说，这我深有体会
Which, honestly, I relate.
总有那种人，自称'我是谜语达人'
There's always like that guy who's like, I'm a riddle guy.
'我有一大堆谜语要考你'
I got lots of riddles for you.
我就觉得，一个谜语还好，但它们都太难了
And I'm like, one riddle is great, but they're so hard.
我永远猜不出来，因为这些谜语设计出来就是让人猜不到的
I'm never gonna get them because they're built to not be gotten.
原文是这样写的：'他们用难题把我们折磨得很惨'
And the way it's written, they made us miserable with hard riddles.
我最好的朋友詹姆斯就遇到了一个几乎无解的谜题
My best friend James got a practically impossible riddle.
说到几乎无解的谜题，我倒是有个谜语要考考你们俩
Well, speaking of practically impossible riddles, I do have a riddle for you two.
哦豁
Oh, boy.
好吧
Okay.
哦，天哪。
Oh, boy.
我想看看你们能不能猜出来。
I wanna see if you guys can figure out.
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