与此同时 | 成人呼啦圈健身

这里是斯蒂芬·科尔伯特主持的《深夜秀拳击秀》。刘易斯，你们在那儿玩得开心点。天啊，真是太棒了。

It's The Late Show Punch Show with Stephen Colbert. Lewis, you guys all have fun out there. Man. A great time. Oh my god.

那晚太有趣了。我最喜欢的部分之一是我们得知获奖时，我亲了伊薇。我站起来转身对大家喊，快来，都下来吧。对，对。

It was such a fun night. One of my favorite parts of it when is we when we found out that we won, I kissed Evie. I stood up and turned around and told everybody, come on, come on down. Yeah. Yeah.

就在我这么做的时候，我走到这边。突然看到一道闪光，原来是你从座位上飞扑过来，几乎是抱住我的胸口，然后我们一起冲上舞台。对，对，那是当晚的高光时刻。哦，能在台上真是太开心了。

And and while I was doing that, I come over here. I just I see this flash from over here, and it's you hurling yourself out of the seats, out of one of the rows, tackle me basically around the chest and you know I run up on stage together. Yeah, yeah. Highlight of the night. Oh, I was so happy to be up there.

各位，我大部分时间都在古希腊新闻工作室里，从帕罗斯和拉尔特斯的大理石中挖掘最热门的故事，按照希腊化时期胜利女神尼刻的完美形象雕刻——她降落时的姿态如此精准，衣衫仿佛仅凭风就紧贴身体，创造出永恒的萨莫色雷斯胜利女神像，这就是我的独白。但偶尔，只是偶尔，我会赢得艾美奖，这也很不错。给我来段'与此同时'，宝贝。与此同时。与此同时。

Folks, I spend most of my time right over there in the ancient Greek news workshop sourcing the most topical Parian and Lartian story marble, which I shape under the Hellenistic ideal of the goddess Nike alighting after flight with such delicate precision that the fabric of a tunic seems to cling to her body held in place only by the wind to create for the timeless winged victory of Samothrae sculpture that is my monologue. But sometimes, just sometimes, I win an Emmy, which is also very good. Hit me with that meanwhile, baby. Meanwhile. Meanwhile.

与此同时，密歇根州新开了一家养生度假村，成年人在那里玩呼啦圈。参与者将圈圈转在手臂、腿、脖子和腰间。甚至还有胸部转圈工作坊——这也是你得提醒爷爷别这么称呼WNBA的词。与此同时，丹麦的诺和诺德公司（Ozempic制造商）裁员约9000人。这家公司...

Meanwhile, in Michigan there is now a wellness retreat where fully grown adults use hula hoops. Participants twirl hoops on their arms, legs, necks, and midriffs. There's even a workshop for boob hooping, which is also what you have to ask your grandpa not to call the WNBA. Meanwhile, in Denmark, Novo Nordisk, maker of Ozempic, lay off about 9,000 people. The company is yeah.

没错。公司正在'瘦身'，很快就会变成自己过去的奇怪消瘦版——顶着同样的大脑袋。与此同时，宾州男子的情感支持鳄鱼再也不能陪主人进沃尔玛了。令人震惊的是这事居然不是发生在佛罗里达。另外我很好奇，鳄鱼能提供多少情感支持？

Yeah. The company is slimming down and will soon and will soon look like a weird skinny version of its old self with the same giant head. Meanwhile, a Pennsylvania man's emotional support alligator can no longer accompany her owner inside a Walmart. That is shocking that this story did not happen in Florida. Also, I gotta guess, just how much emotional support can you get from an alligator?

它是爬行动物，没有感...等等，你给它穿毛衣？我收回刚才的话。快看天上那条鳄鱼现在提供了多少情感支持。

It's a reptile. It's in capable of feel wait. You put it on a sweater? I stand corrected. Look at all the emotional support that alligator is now providing in the sky.

但各位请注意，仅仅因为这是一件可爱的毛衣，并不意味着它的威胁性降低。我们都记得克里斯·埃文斯在《利刃出鞘》里的表现。懂吗？谋杀我吧，老爸。

But just just just just a warning everybody. Just because it's an acute sweater does not make it any less threatening. We all remember Chris Evans in Knives Out. Okay? Murder me, daddy.

我不明白这是什么意思，我只是照着提词器念。这位主人对爬行动物情有独钟，他还养了六条蛇、一只豹纹守宫、一只科莫多龙、一只蓝舌石龙子和第二只鳄鱼。哦，你对第二只鳄鱼很有感觉嘛。

I don't know what that means. I just would read it in the prompter. The owner is really into reptiles. He also owns six snakes, a leopard gecko, a Komodo dragon, an oscillated skink, and a second alligator. Oh, you got a feel for the second alligator.

他给你买毛衣了吗？看起来没有。谁在给你情感支持？反正不是那只蓝舌石龙子。与此同时，一位女士为救她的狗拳打鳄鱼。

Did he buy you a sweater? Doesn't look like it. Who's giving you emotional support? Because it ain't the oscillated skink. Meanwhile, a woman punched an alligator to rescue her dog.

等等，那只鳄鱼穿毛衣了吗？说不定它只是想给你的狗一个情感支持之吻。顺便说，上面这个故事确实发生在佛罗里达。这才是正确操作。与此同时，欧洲正禁止某些凝胶指甲油中使用的一种化学物质，将其归类为生殖毒性物质——这引发了一个令人不安的问题：她们到底把指甲油涂在哪儿了？

Hold on, Was the alligator wearing a sweater? Maybe he was just giving your dog an emotional support kiss. By the way, this story up here did happen in Florida. That's how you do it. Meanwhile, Europe is banning a chemical used in some gel nail polishes classifying it as a reproductive toxicant, which raises the disturbing question, where are they brushing on that polish?

另一边，发明了'沙克胡椒oni披萨'及后续'沙克心脏病发作'的棒约翰披萨。上周，棒约翰低调推出了新产品——他们称之为'可颂披萨'。他们知道法国有核武器对吧？而本月底，在运营三十多年后，美国在线(AOL)终于要关闭其拨号上网服务了。

Meanwhile, Papa John's, the inventors of the Shaq a Roni pizza and the subsequent Shaq cardiac arrest. Last week, Papa John's soft launched its new pizza, a product they are calling the croissant pizza. They know France has nuclear weapons. Right? Meanwhile, at the end of the month, after more than thirty years, AOL is finally shutting down its dial up internet service.

为纪念这一互联网巨头的落幕，我们制作了这段致敬视频。'我会记得你'。感谢收听《史蒂芬·科拜尔深夜播客秀》。最后提醒，如果想看更多我的内容，请前往《深夜秀》YouTube频道观看更多片段和独家内容。

And in honor of the ending of this major internet institution, we put together this tribute video. I will remember you. Thank you for listening to The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert. Just one more thing, if you wanna see more of me, come to the Late Show YouTube channel for more clips and exclusives.