如何像斯多葛学派一样思考（并停止焦虑）

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Welcome to today's episode of the mindset mentor podcast. I am your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so hit that subscribe button. So you never miss another episode. And, also, if you've ever gotten anything from any episode I've ever put out, share an episode with a friend.

你可能认识某个需要听到这些内容的人，这或许能以某种方式改变你的生活。如果你这样做了，我将非常感激。今天，我要和大家聊聊一个你可能从未听说过、听起来甚至有些疯狂的概念，直到我告诉你它的好处。我们要讨论的是可视化，但不是可视化你渴望的生活，而是进行一种叫做'反向可视化'的练习。

You probably know somebody that needs to hear this, and it would be great to change your life in some sort of way. So if you do that, I would greatly appreciate it. Today, I'm gonna talk to you about something that maybe you've never heard of and actually sounds like a crazy idea until I tell you the benefits of it. We're gonna be talking about visualization, but not visualizing the life that you want. We're gonna do something that's called reverse visualization.

这也被称为消极可视化。你知道，研究一再表明可视化如何帮助你创造想要的生活。但大多数时候，当我们想到可视化时，我们想象的是最好的自己，拥有所有想要的金钱、幸福、成功和爱，我们描绘完美的未来。而我要和你谈论的恰恰与此相反。如果你彻底失败，一切变得一团糟，那会是什么样子？

It's also called negative visualization. And, you know, study after study shows how visualization can help you create the life that you want. But most of the time when we think of visualization, we think about our best selves, and we think about having all of the money and the happiness and the success and the love that we want, and we visualize the perfect future. What I'm gonna talk to you about is the absolute exact opposite of that. What does it look like if you absolutely fail and all shit hits the fan?

这就是我们今天要讨论的内容。今天，我要和你谈谈所谓的消极可视化，它也被称为防御性悲观主义。这个想法最初源自数千年前的斯多葛哲学。最简单的形式是，去可视化你最害怕发生的事情。

That's what we're gonna talk about today. Today, I'm gonna talk to you about something that's called negative visualization. It's also called defense pessimism. The idea originally comes from if you go back thousands of years ago from stoic philosophy. And at its simplest form, the idea is to visualize the thing that you are most afraid of happening.

想象可能发生的最坏情况。你可能会觉得，这听起来是个糟糕的主意。我为什么要这样做？这听起来像是我想避免的未来，为什么我还要去想象它？

Visualize the absolute worst that could happen. And you might be like, that that seems like a terrible idea. Why would I ever wanna do that? That sounds something like I I want to avoid that future. Why would I visualize it?

如果它发生了，我会感受到那些情绪。这似乎是个可怕的想法，与你所知和所学的一切背道而驰，但请相信我。随着我们今天深入探讨，你会明白的。我将向你展示如何利用消极可视化来改变你的生活，规划你的生活，以及如何对你真正害怕的事情进行脱敏。

I'm gonna feel the feelings if it's happening. It seems like it's a terrible idea. It seems counterintuitive to all the things that you know and what you've been taught, but trust me. It will make sense as we go through it today. And I'll show you how you can actually use negative visualization to change your life, to plan your life out, and then also how to desensitize yourself to the things that you're actually afraid of.

首先，这可以在事业上帮助你。如果你有一份事业或正考虑创业，我希望你做的是，如果你有事业，就想象它彻底毁灭的情景。想象你拖延、不采取行动、不做促进业务成长所需的事，也许为未能达到目标找借口，陷入各种情绪并继续拖延，也许刷Instagram或看Netflix而不是发展事业，然后想象那事业完全失败。接着想象事业完全失败带来的后果。最终，你知道，你失败了。

So the first thing that this can help you with is business. If you have a business or if you're thinking about starting a business, the thing I want you to do is to visualize the absolute destruction of your business if you have one. Visualize you procrastinating and not taking action and not doing what you need to to grow your business, maybe making the excuses of why you're not where you wanna be, maybe getting in all of your feelings and continuing to procrastinate more, maybe scrolling on Instagram or watching Netflix instead of growing your business, and then visualize that business failing completely. And then what the the effects of that business failing completely are. Then you end up you know, you you fail.

你最终会浪费大量时间。损失大量金钱。耗尽所有精力。付不起账单。失去你的房子。

You end up losing a bunch of time. You lose a bunch of money. You waste all of your energy. You can't pay your bills. You lose your house.

你无家可归。无法养活自己。挨饿。死亡。这就是哇。

You're homeless. You can't feed yourself. You starve. You die. That's woah.

这就是我们可能走到的最糟糕境地。把这一切都想象出来。我要你看到其中的每一步。我要你看到它，我要你看到的不是那种，嘿，生意失败了，你走出门，被陨石砸中，它砸死了你和你的全家。

That's where we've gone as as as bad as it possibly can. Visualize it all. I want you to see every single step of it. And I want you to see it, and I want you to see not like, hey. The business fails, and you walk outside, and you get hit by a meteor, and it kills you and your entire family.

就像，最后那部分可能不会发生。但真的要想象你自己没有做该做的事，生意失败了，然后随之而来的一切。你知道，当我公司聘请运营副总裁时，我把她挖了过来，她当时职位很高。她是一家市值数十亿美元公司的幕僚长，她让我们做了这个策略，不是去想象它，但她有个叫做‘事前剖析’的东西，就是规划出生意会如何失败。她说，嘿。

Like, that last part's probably not going to happen. But actually visualize yourself not doing what needs to be done, the business failing, and then everything that comes from that. You know, when I brought on my VP of operations in my company, I recruited her over, and she was a, you know, pretty high up. She was a a chief of staff for a multibillion dollar company, and she had us go through this strategy, not to visualize it, but she had this thing that was called premortem, which is planning out how the business will fail. She said, hey.

如果你让我加入这个生意，我想规划出生意可能失败的每一种方式。原因在于，一旦你规划出所有生意可能失败的方式，那么你要做的就是审视那三种、五种或不管多少种方式，然后你可以规划并制定一个计划来确保它不会发生，这反过来会让生意成功。所以这是我想要你做的第一件事。如果你有生意，就规划你的生意失败。那你的关系呢？

If if you bring me into this business, I wanna plan every single way that the business could fail. And the reason why is because once you plan all the ways that the business could fail, well, then what you can do is you can look at those three ways, five ways, whatever they are, and then you can plan and put a plan together to make sure that it does not happen, which in turn makes the business succeed. And so that's the first thing I want you do. If you have a business, plan your business failing. What about your relationships?

如果你在一段关系中，想象那段关系的终结。想象你，你知道，不去约会之夜，不优先考虑他们，想象你，你知道，在情感上不关心你的伴侣，在情感上与你的伴侣断开连接。也许想象他们觉得与你如此疏远，最终背叛了你，然后你发现了。想象那段关系中可能发生的最坏情况以及那段关系如何结束。然后你要做的就是把它全部写下来，写下所有可能结束的方式，然后你可以计划确保它不会发生。

If you're in a relationship, visualize the end of that relationship. Visualize you, you know, not going for date nights, not prioritizing them, visualizing you, you know, not caring about your partner emotionally and disconnecting from your partner emotionally. Maybe visualize them feeling so disconnected from you that they end up cheating on you, and then you find out about it. Visualize the absolute worst that could happen in that relationship and how that relationship could end. And then what you could do what you do is you write it all down, and you put down all the ways that could possibly end, and then you can plan to make sure that it doesn't happen.

然后你可以改变你的行动。然后是健康。想象你不把健康放在首位。想象你说，哦，我太忙了没空去健身房。哦，我太忙了没空吃饭，所以我要停下来去吃麦当劳。

And you could change your actions. And then your health. Visualize you not making your health a priority. Visualize you saying, oh, I'm too busy to go to the gym. Oh, I'm too busy to eat food, so I'm gonna stop and get McDonald's.

想象一下你没有吃对的食物。想象一下你在未来十年里忽视所有危险信号。然后想象你走进医生的办公室，医生告诉你，嘿，你只剩下三个月生命，或者对你来说可能是其他情况。想象所有可能发生的最坏情况。

Visualize you not eating the right foods. Visualize you ignoring all of the red flags for the next ten years. And then visualize you walking into the doctor's office and then telling you, hey. You have three months left to live or whatever it might be for you. Visualize all of the worst that could happen.

天啊。这是我发布过的最令人沮丧的一期节目了，对吧？我们还没说完。想象一下你现在的工作。

Oh my god. This is the most depressing freaking episode I've ever put out. Right? We're not done yet. Visualize this job that you have.

也许你对工作感到压力很大，想象你没有采取正确的行动来展示自己的价值，想象你没有做该做的事，想象你搞砸了并失去了工作。想象所有这些事情，并且想象任何你害怕的事情，任何恐惧，任何限制性信念，害怕他人的看法，害怕失败，害怕不够好，不够聪明，你知道，害怕无法成功经营事业来支付家庭开销，无论是什么。想象你最害怕的事情。你可以想象，你知道，很多人害怕公开演讲，也许你想，我想开始公开演讲，但我太害怕了。我们就想象你没有为演讲做准备，没有做足够的研究，说话结巴，看起来像个傻瓜，在整个公司面前丢脸，无论可能是什么情况。

Maybe you stress out about your job, visualize you're not taking the right action to to show your worth, and visualize you're not doing what needs to be done and visualizing you messing up and losing your job. Visualize all this stuff, and you visualize anything that you're afraid of, any fear, any limiting belief, the fear of other people's opinions, the fear of failure, the fear of not being good enough, not being smart enough, not, you know, being able to be successful enough to run a business to be able to pay for your family's needs, whatever it is. You visualize the thing that you are most afraid of. You could visualize you know, so many people are afraid of public speaking, and maybe you're like, I wanna start public speaking, but I'm so afraid of it. We'll visualize you not preparing for the presentation, not doing enough research, fumbling on your words, looking like an idiot, embarrassing yourself in front of your entire company, whatever it might be.

然后我要你想象的最后一件事是，想象你的整个人生。想象你没有做你需要做的事来把自己塑造成最好的版本。想象你决定放弃自我提升。想象你，你知道，不做困难的事情，放弃你的潜力，没有发挥出你的潜力，最后躺在临终床上，后悔自己只活了一半的人生。现在有些听众已经感到焦虑了，我很惊讶你还在这里。

And then the very last thing that I want you to visualize, visualize your entire life. Visualize you not doing what you need to do to create yourself into the absolute best version of yourself. Visualize you deciding to skip out on your development. Visualize you, you know, not doing the hard things, give giving up on your your potential, not living up to your potential, and getting to your deathbed and regretting that you lived a life that was half lived. Now some of you guys listening already feel anxious, and I'm surprised you're still here.

我很惊讶你还没有直接关掉这该死的节目，因为那太令人沮丧了，对吧？而且你感到焦虑、悲伤或沮丧是好事。这很好，因为我们将讨论如何处理这些情绪以及为什么这样做很重要。想象你想要的生活很重要，想象你的生活一团糟也很重要。

I'm surprised you didn't just turn the shit off already because that was depressing. Right? And it's it's good that you feel anxious or sad or depressed about those things. It's good because we're gonna talk about what you do with this and why this is an important thing to do. It is important to visualize the life that you want, and it's also important to visualize your life being an absolute train wreck.

我们马上回来。现在回到节目。为什么这很重要，原因有很多。有几个不同的步骤。第一个原因是这对你非常有益，因为我们不建立事业、不采取行动或不做改变生活所需的事情的原因之一是变化中有太多的不确定性。

And we will be right back. And now back to the show. The reason why number one, this is important. There's a couple different steps. Number one reason why this is really good for you is because one of the reasons why we don't build our business or take action or do the things that we need to do to change our life is because there's so much uncertainty in change.

有太多的不确定性。当我们想象可能发生的事情时，它会消除所有的不确定性，让它感觉更确定一些。我喜欢的是，你知道，我不久前在心态大学做了这个练习，我们做了这个，每个人都试图想象可能发生的最坏情况，他们意识到可能发生的最坏情况其实没什么大不了的。就像，没那么严重。而且，你知道，他们必须深入思考，试图让情况变得更糟。

There's so much uncertainty. And when we visualize what could happen, it takes all of the uncertainty and makes it feel a little bit more certain. And the thing that I love you know, I was doing this this with Mindset University not long ago, is we did this, and everybody tried to visualize the worst that could happen, and they realized that the worst that could happen wasn't really a big deal. Like, it was, like, not that big of a deal. And, you know, they they, like, had to, like, go deeper, and they were, like, trying to make it worse.

然后当他们把事情弄得更糟时，他们却说，这绝不可能发生。但我的想法是，如果我把生意搞砸了，我可能会这样那样，然后最终会进监狱。而对方说，那太荒谬了，我绝不会进监狱。所以，你知道，这消除了不确定性，让它感觉更确定，这对人类来说非常重要，因为当存在不确定性，未来仿佛一片模糊时，人类大脑会说，危险。

And then as they were making it worse, they're like, this would never happen, though. But my mind is thinking that if I run my business in the ground, I'll somehow blah blah blah blah and blah blah blah blah, and then I'll end up in jail. And and the person's like, that's ridiculous. I would never end up in jail. And so, you know, it takes the uncertainty and makes it feel more certain, which is a really important thing for humans because when there's uncertainty and it's just kind of like the future is just, like, missed in front of us, the human brain says, no danger.

不要那样做。我想做的是想象所有可能性。这是第一点。第二点，也是非常重要的一点是，它能让你脱敏。它让你对未来感到不那么焦虑，因为你已经看到了所有可能出现在你面前的道路。

Don't do it. What I wanna do is I wanna visualize all possibilities. So that's the first thing. The second thing that it does that's really, really important is it desensitizes you. It makes you feel less anxiety about the future because you've already seen all of the paths that could possibly be in front of you.

你确信它可能不会像你希望的那样好，但可能仍然相当不错。所以，想象最坏情况的好处在于，最坏的情况能让你脱敏。就像有人非常非常害怕蛇一样。于是他们说，好吧，我们要做的是把一条蛇带进房间。

And you're sure it's probably not gonna be as good as you want to be, but it'll probably still be pretty good. And so the good thing about about visualizing the worst that could happen is that the worst that could happen desensitizes you. It's the same as when somebody is, you know, really, really terrified of snakes. And so they're like, okay. What we're gonna do is we're gonna bring in a snake into the room.

它会待在一个玻璃箱里。没什么大不了的。它无法从玻璃箱里出来，我们会把它放在房间的另一边。那个人会在房间的另一边看到它。他们会变得非常焦虑。

It's gonna be in a glass box. No big deal. It cannot get out the glass box, and we're gonna put it on the other side of the room. The person will see it on the other side of room. They get really anxious.

他们会变得非常紧张。随着时间的推移，情况没那么糟了。还好。我仍然不喜欢这样，但不像刚进来时那么糟糕了。好吧。

They get really stressed. And as time goes on, it's not as bad. It's okay. I'm I'm still not happy about it, but it's not as bad as it was when they first walked in. Okay.

现在我们要做的是，把它稍微移近一点。他们把它挪近一点点。天啊，它越来越近了。好吧。但我们让它在那里待十分钟，然后他们开始稍微平静下来。

Now what we're gonna do, we're gonna move a little bit closer to you. They move it just a little bit closer. Oh my god, it's coming closer. Okay. But let's keep it there for ten minutes, and it starts to kind of calm down just a little bit.

好吧。我正在冷静下来。没那么糟。最终，如果他们这样做得足够多，这被称为暴露疗法。如果他们进行足够的暴露疗法，最终可以做到——可能不是今天。

Okay. I'm calming down. I'm not that bad. And, eventually, if they do this enough, it's called exposure therapy. If they do this exposure therapy enough, they can eventually get and it might not be today.

可能是明天，也可能是后天。有人去握住那条对他们来说绝对可怕的蛇。这会让你脱敏，消除不确定性，让它变得更确定一些。于是在1996年对此进行了一项研究，称之为防御性悲观主义，模拟替代方案的乐观主义。

It might be tomorrow. It might be the next day. Somebody to hold the snake that was absolute terrifying to them. It desensitizes you, and it takes the uncertainty and makes it little bit more certain. And so there was a a study that was done on this in 1996, and it was called defensive pessimism, optimism in simulating alternatives.

该研究考察了防御性悲观主义，也就是负面可视化，换个词来说，与乐观主义一起，实际上发现可视化负面替代方案或想象过去事件可能变得更糟，为这样做的人提供了心理益处。防御性悲观主义者使用这些策略来缓解他们的焦虑，然后在未来感到更有准备。所以通过可视化这些事情，实际上你可能会在思考时感到更焦虑，但当你进入生活时，你缓解了焦虑，感到更有准备。这是第二点。第三点与此非常重要的是它让你能够进行战略规划。

And the research looked at defensive pessimism, which is negative visualization, just another word, along with optimism and actually found that visualizing negative alternatives or imagining how past events could have gone worse provided psychological benefits for the people who did it. Defensive pessimists use these strategies to alleviate their anxiety and then feel more prepared in the future. So by visualizing these things, they actually it it you might feel more anxious thinking about it, but when you go into life, you alleviate anxiety, you feel more prepared. So that's the second thing. The third thing that is really important with this is it allows you to strategically plan.

正如我在商业中告诉你的，这被称为事前剖析过程，即在纸上规划出你的业务可能失败的每一种方式。你也可以对你的婚姻这样做。你可以和你的伴侣坐下来，说，嘿，听着，我想规划出我们婚姻可能失败的每一种方式。

As I told you in business, it's called premortem process, which is planning out every single way that your business could fail on paper. You can do this with your marriage too. You can sit down with your with your partner and say, hey. Listen. You know, I want to plan out every single way that our marriage could fail.

这听起来很疯狂，但原因在于，一旦我们看到它可能如何失败，我们就可以制定一个逐步的过程，确保我们不做会导致失败的事情，我们不跳过约会之夜，我们不把彼此不作为优先事项。你可以规划业务的失败、关系的失败、你人生的失败，以确保它不会发生。1997年进行了一项研究，称为反事实思维，情感与功能的交汇点。该论文深入探讨了反事实思维的作用。

And it sounds crazy, but the reason why is because then once we see how it could fail, we can make a step by step process to make sure that we don't do the things that would make it fail, that we don't skip date night, that we don't not make each other a priority. And you can plan out the failure of the business, the failure of the relationship, the failure of your life, the failure to ensure that it does not happen. And there was a a study that was done in 1997. It was called counterfactual thinking, the intersection of effect and function. And the paper dives into the role of counterfactual thinking.

因此，通过在脑海中预演事情可能出错的方式，人们可以制定策略来避免他们不想要的结果，从而带来更高效和更少焦虑的方法。这是第三点。第四点，奇怪的是，它给你更多的控制感，因为你已经看到了所有可能发生的事情。如果你已经看到了所有可能发生的事情，那么无论发生什么，你都会做好准备。而且你已经看到了，也已经规划好了。

So by mentally rehearsing how things could go wrong, people can develop strategies to avoid the outcomes that they don't want, which then leads to a more productive and less anxious approach. So that's number three. And the fourth thing, oddly enough, it gives you way more sense of control because you've already you've already seen everything that could happen. If you've seen everything that could happen, then no matter what happens, you're going to be prepared for it. And you've already seen it, and you've also already planned it out.

所以你已经看到了可能发生的最坏情况。你已经规划了可能发生的最坏情况和最好情况。你看到了所有可能发生在你面前的潜在未来。然后现在你只需要朝着你想要的那个未来采取正确的行动。所以它给了你更多的控制感。

And so you've seen the worst that could happen. You've planned out the worst that could happen and the best that could happen. You see all potential futures that could possibly happen in front of you. And then now you just have to take the right action towards the one that you want. And so it gives you much more of a sense of control.

它让你在做事时能够更加主动，减少焦虑。所以现在你要做的，因为你已经看到了一切，已经规划好了一切，就是去行动，哦，是的，我以前见过这个，而不是，哦，天哪，这是我从未见过的东西。我以前见过这个。

It gives you allows you to be more proactive and less anxious in your approach as you're doing it. And so now all you have to do because you've already seen everything, you've already planned everything out, is you have to go, oh, yeah. I've seen this before versus, oh my god. This is something I've never seen. I've seen this before.

你知道吗？我已经制定了一个计划，确保事情不会走偏。1986年进行了一项关于防御性悲观主义的研究，这项研究被称为‘防御性悲观主义：利用焦虑作为动力’。研究发现，这正是防御性悲观主义这一术语的来源。研究人员真正研究的是，有些人会故意思考最坏的情况，以此作为管理焦虑的一种方式。

And you know what? I've already made a plan to make sure that it doesn't go the wrong way. And so there was a a study that was done on defensive pessimism that was done in 1986, and it was called defensive pessimism, harnessing anxiety as motivation. And the study found this is where the actual term of defensive pessimism came from. The study found and the researchers, what they really worked on was that some people deliberately thought about worst case scenarios as a way to manage their anxiety.

而那些这样做的人，在使用这一策略时感受到了更多的控制力和动力。我知道这听起来非常违反直觉，甚至适得其反，去想象负面情况，但这正是我建议你做的。而且请不要每天都这样做。我建议你选一天，早上醒来时，想象对你重要的事情彻底崩溃——你的关系、你的事业、你的生活，彻底毁灭，你看到所有可能的方式，发挥创意去想象事情可能变糟的各种可能性。

And the ones who did, those individuals felt way more control and motivation when using the strategy. And so I know it seems very counterintuitive, but also counterproductive to visualize the negative, but this is what I recommend that you do. And you don't please don't do this every single day. I recommend that you take one day and you wake up in the morning and you visualize the absolute destruction of something important to you, the absolute destruction of your relationship, of your business, of your life, the absolute destruction, and you see every possible way, and you get so creative of how things could possibly go bad. And then what you do is you then take a pen and paper, and you say, what are all of the ways that this marriage could go bad?

然后你拿起纸笔，写下所有可能的方式，这段婚姻可能会变糟？你把它们全部写下来，然后坐下来和你的婚姻伴侣（同样也应该和你的商业伙伴一起）说：‘嘿，这些是我认为我们的婚姻可能会出问题的方式。我想和你坐下来制定一个计划。’你可以对你的商业伙伴做同样的事情：‘嘿。’

And you write all of them down, and then you sit down with your, you know, marriage partner the same way it should go with your business partner, and you say, hey. These are all the ways that I think our marriage could go bad. I wanna sit down and make a plan with you. You could do the exact same thing with your business partner. Hey.

‘这些是我认为我们的事业可能会失败的方式。我想为所有这些情况制定一个计划，确保我们做正确的事情。’当你这样做时，你会开始意识到你有了更多的掌控感。你对未来不再那么恐惧，并且能够采取主动行动。然后我建议你再回头去想象你想要的生活，每天早上都这样想象，这样你就在反过来给自己洗脑，让自己相信你想要的生活是可能的。

These are all the ways that I think our business could fail. I wanna create a plan for all of these to make sure that we do the right things. What happens is you start to realize when you do this that you have more of a sense of control. You don't feel so much fear about the future, and you're able to take proactive action. And then what I would recommend is then go back to visualizing the life that you want and visualize that every single morning so that you're visualizing in your in turn, brainwashing yourself to believe that the life that you want is possible.

你在给自己洗脑，让自己相信你可以创造你想要的一切，但同时，以防万一，你也做好了准备，以防事情变得糟糕。这就是我今天这一集要分享的内容。如果你喜欢这一集，请帮我一个大忙。把它分享给你认识并爱的人，让他们也能从中受益。另外，如果你想在播客之外了解更多关于与我教练的信息，请访问 coachwithrob.com。

You're brainwashing yourself into believing that you can create every single thing that you want, but you also, just in case, are prepared in case shit hits the fan. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please do me a massive favor. Share it with someone that you know and love so that they can benefit from listening to it as well. And, also, if you wanna learn more about coaching with me outside of the podcast, go to coachwithrob.com.

再次提醒，coachwithrob.com。就这样，我会用每集结束时的同样话语告别你。让你的使命是让别人的一天变得更好。我感谢你，希望你拥有美好的一天。

Once again, coachwithrob.com. And with that, I'm gonna leave you the same way I leave you every single episode. Make it your mission, make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you, and I hope that you have an amazing day.