386. 26年里我学到的26堂课

第11课。

Lesson number 11.

如果有去海滩的机会，你就应该总是去。

If there is an opportunity to go to the beach, you should always go.

你年纪越大，就越能意识到水和大自然的治愈力量。

The older you get, the more you realize the healing power of water and the healing power of of nature.

这被称为海洋疗法。

It's called thalassa therapy.

我非常支持这一点，关于这一课，我就不多说了。

I'm a big proponent, and I'm gonna say nothing more about that lesson.

我觉得这一点很明显。

I feel like that one's pretty obvious.

第12课：即使觉得毫无意义，也要努力去做某件事，不管是什么。

Lesson number 12, work hard at something even if it feels meaningless, whatever it is.

通常，我觉得我们把所有的努力都留给了别人。

Typically, I feel like we save all of our hard work for others.

我真心觉得，我们把所有的努力都留给了老板、父母、同事，以及那些我们想给对方留下好印象的人。

I honestly think we save all of our hard work for our boss, for our parents, for our coworkers, for people we want to impress.

留一些努力给自己，用在那些对你个人有意义的事情上。

Save some of that hard work for you, and use it for things that feel personally meaningful.

即使当时看起来毫无意义，或者觉得不会有任何结果，努力工作依然能带来很多好处。

There is so much good that comes from working hard even if it at the time, it seems like there's no point or, like, nothing is gonna come from it.

努力写一本没人会读的小说。

Working hard on a novel, no one's gonna read.

努力提升自己的跑步水平，即使你永远不会成为职业运动员。

Working hard on improving your running even though you're never gonna be a professional.

为了自己而精心完善一道食谱，或者任何其他事情。

Working hard on perfecting a recipe just for yourself or whatever it is.

对我而言，大量的个人回报都来自于我为在乎的事情努力时所感受到的快乐。

So much personal reward for me has come from the joy I've just found from working hard for things that I care about.

当时这些事只是有趣，但你永远不知道它们会带你走向何方。

And at the time were just fun, but you never know where it's gonna take you.

这个播客就是一个很好的例子。

This podcast is a great example.

我真的没想到会发展成这样。

Like, I didn't know this was gonna happen.

我只是喜欢为此付出努力。

I just liked working hard at it.

我深信宇宙或某种力量会奖励努力，并欣赏热情。

And I just have a deep belief that the universe or the forces that be reward hard work and like to see passion.

因此，当它看到有人努力工作，证明他们即使没有回报，也会为了快乐、个人追求和热情而持续付出时，这些人的生活中就会有好事发生，这正是源于这些实践。

And so when it sees somebody working hard, proving that they will work hard in the future for no reward, just for joy and personal pursuit and personal passion, good things come to those people because of those practices.

在乎本身就已经是一种回报，但我同时也觉得，当你置身于真正关心事物的境地时，人们喜欢看到那些有情怀的人。

It is a reward in itself to care, but I also feel like when you put yourself in the place where you do care, people like to see other people who care.

他们喜欢看到对某件事充满热情的人，你会发现，机会会更自然地降临到你身上。

And they like to see people who are passionate about something, and you'll find that opportunities come so much more naturally to you.

当人们看到你投身于比自己更大的事业，并愿意为之努力时，他们会聚集在你身边。

People rally around you when, yeah, when there's something bigger than you that you're invested in and that you're willing to work hard for.

所以，如果你现在生活中还没有任何值得你努力投入的事情，哪怕每周只花二十分钟，我也真心认为，找到一件你愿意为此付出时间的事，会让你的生活变得更好。

So if there's not something in your life right now that you are working hard for, even if it's only working hard for twenty minutes a week, I really think your life would benefit from finding something that you wanna give that time to.

好的。

Okay.

第十三点。

Number 13.

第十三课。

Lesson 13.

这是一个我不太想学的课程，我曾犹豫不决，但它太明显了，无法忽视。

This is a lesson that I didn't wanna I I was hesitant to learn, but it was too obvious to ignore.

如果你早上起床后不第一时间碰手机，你总会感觉更好。

You are always going to feel better if you don't go on your phone first thing in the morning.

为什么呢？为什么我花了这么长时间才明白这一点？

Why was this why did this take me so long to learn?

我不知道。

I don't know.

显然，我们的手机很有瘾。

Obviously, our phones are addictive.

这听起来像是在推卸责任。

That feels like a cop out.

这听起来像是个借口。

That feels like an excuse.

现在有很多关于回归非数字化、数字排毒、远离社交媒体和参与线下活动的讨论。

There's all this buzz around, like, going analog and the digital detox and being social media free and offline activities.

而我确实尝试过进入那种状态，那真的非常棒。

And having, like, really tried to be in that space, it is really incredible.

但如果觉得那太难了，我觉得这是最简单的方法。

But if that feels too big, I feel like this is the simplest thing.

我曾经尝试过在周末只用功能机。

You know, I tried to do the flip phone on weekends.

我也尝试过给自己设定社交媒体的界限。

I tried to give myself social media boundaries.

它暂时有效。

It worked for a while.

我觉得我一下子做得太过头了。

I think I went too big with it.

这是一个很好的起点。

This is a great starting point.

只要不在早上一醒来就碰手机，就能改变你一整天的节奏。

Just not going on your phone first thing in the morning will change the course of your entire day.

因为一旦你把手机举到面前，就好像立刻被吸进了别人的世界。

Because the moment you put that phone in front of your face, it's like you're immediately, like, sucked into someone else's world.

说实话，你马上就会变得有点脑子空白。

You're immediately, I guess, little bit brain dead, to be honest.

我这话是对那些偶尔还是会这么做的人说的。

And I'm saying this to somebody who still does it occasionally.

如果这真的是你每天醒来第一件事，你又怎么能期待自己接下来保持好奇心，享受生活中的小事，或留意周围的一切呢？这就像你被连上了这条持续不断输送娱乐的静脉滴注。

It's like, if if that's the first thing you look at, how you expected to then go forward with the rest of your day being curious or being entertained by the smaller things or noticing things when it's like it's like you're hooked up to this, like, ivy drip of entertainment.

所以，给自己至少二十到三十分钟，纯粹地体验活着的感觉，不要用手机，也不要接触这个装着整个世界的小盒子。

So give yourself at least twenty, thirty minutes to just experience being alive without a phone and without this thing that contains the entire world inside of it.

是的。

Yeah.

尤其是早上第一件事，我想你会注意到变化。

At least first thing in the morning, I think you will notice a difference.

我确实注意到了。

I definitely did.

好的。

Okay.

所以第十四课，另一个非常重要但更严肃的建议。

So lesson number 14, another really important one, but a little bit more serious.

别再试图成为他们。

Stop trying to be them.

无论‘他们’对你来说是谁，都不重要。

Whoever them is to you, it doesn't matter.

无论他们是名人、朋友、对手还是父母，当你以模仿为目标时，你永远不会成功。

Whether it's a celebrity, a friend, a nemesis, a parent, like, you will never be successful when the goal is imitation.

你会因为试图纠正、控制和把自己塑造成一个不属于你的身份而逼疯自己，因为那不是你天然的样子。

And you will drive yourself mad trying to correct and police and mold yourself into an identity that doesn't come naturally because it's not yours.

我这样做了很久。

I did this for ages.

我很容易受他人影响，大概是因为那些似乎了解自己、拥有身份或品牌、具备独特魅力的人真的很有吸引力，而我当时还没有这些。

I was so easily influenced because I I guess there's just something really alluring about people who seem to know themselves and who have an identity or who have have a brand, who have a distinct thing to them that's attractive when I didn't have that.

猜怎么着？

Guess what?

通过模仿他们、试图成为他们，我反而更不了解自己了，因为我总是把自己的起步阶段和自己的新身份，与他们完整的身份作比较。

By trying to imitate them, by trying to be them, I actually knew myself less because I would constantly compare the beginning of my own new self and my own identity to their complete one.

老兄，这太老生常谈了。

Guys, it's so cliche.

我知道。

I know.

但我完全相信，我们每个人都有一个独特的版本。

But I fully believe I fully believe there is a unique version of us.

我们每个人来到这里，都是为了成为独特的化身，我们都注定是独立的个体，注定以特定的方式成长，注定以特定的形式存在，过上特定的生活。

We are all here to be a unique avatar, and we are all meant to be individual, and we're meant to grow in a specific way, and we are meant to exist in a specific form and live a specific life.

而模仿是阻碍我们实现使命、展现自我、履行人生角色的主要因素之一。

And imitation is one of the main things that's gonna block us and that's gonna stop us from living out our mission and living out our identity and living out our role in the world.

我知道这一集听起来越来越玄乎了，但请你自己留意一下。

And I know this episode is getting so woo woo, but just notice it in yourself.

确实存在一种身份。

There is there is an identity.

有一种属于你的版本，你总是被它吸引，不断被拉回去，被它深深吸引，这是一种非常强大的力量。

There is a a version of you that you're you just feel constantly drawn to and drawn back to and drawn into, and it's, like, such a powerful force.

别再试图压抑它了。

Stop trying to suppress that.

别让模仿阻隔在你和那个新的你之间。

Stop putting imitation in between you and that version of you, that new version of you.

好的。

Okay.

第15课。

Lesson number 15.

有时候，你就是那个糟糕的日子，你需要对自己指出来。

Sometimes you are the bad day, and you need to call yourself on it.

这可能是列表中最新的课程。

This is probably the most recent lesson on the list.

如果我坦诚地说，我可能才刚在几周前学到这一课。

Probably a lesson I only learnt a couple of weeks ago, if I'm being completely honest.

枕头日，我前几天说了个糟糕的日子，当时我男朋友在打呼噜。

Pillow day, I just had I said this terrible day the other day, and my boyfriend was snoring.

我爱他，但我不知道该怎么办。

I love him, but so I don't know what.

他刚满27岁，突然间，鼻塞成了他的代名词。

He, like, turned 27 and suddenly, like, nasal congestion is his middle name.

我爱你，汤姆。

I love you, Tom.

但希望他别听到这句话。

But and hopefully he doesn't hear that.

但他一直在打呼噜，所以我睡得特别差。

But he was snoring, and so I had a really bad night's sleep.

然后我去给我的英国银行卡转账，但没成功。

And then I went to, like, transfer money onto my UK card, and it wasn't working.

接着我去街角的便利店买了个贝果，结果贝果在街上散开了。

And then I went and got a bagel at the, like, the corner store, and my bagel, like, fell apart on the street.

然后一只小狗跑过来，从地上吃掉了我贝果里的金枪鱼。

And this, like, little dog came up and, like, ate tuna from my tuna bagel, like, from where it was on the floor.

然后我去见我的朋友。

And then I went to meet my friend.

我迟到了，却租不到一辆共享单车。

I was running late, and I couldn't get a line bike.

然后我终于租到一辆共享单车，结果车坏了。

And then when I got a line bike, it was broken.

我当时就想，这天真是糟透了。

And I was like, this day just sucks.

我心情糟糕到了极点。

And I was in such a terrible mood.

我气得要命。

And I was so angry.

我心想，我到底做了什么要遭这份罪？

And I was like, what did I do to deserve this?

这简直是最糟糕的一天了。

Like, this is just such a terrible day.

然后我想，是啊，但其实是我自己在制造糟糕的一天。

And then I was like, yeah, but I'm being the bad day.

这些事确实都让人烦透了。

Like, all those things are annoying.

但真正的问题到底是什么呢？

But what's really the problem here?

呃。

Ugh.

就像，我深爱的那个人，他也爱我，他是我见过最伟大、最美好的人，但他打呼噜，打扰了我的睡眠。

Like, how terrible the man that I love who loves me, who is, like, the most glorious, beautiful person I've ever met, like, he snores, and that disturbs my sleep.

而且，嘿，我银行账户里有足够的钱可以转到我的英国银行卡上，因为我有足够的特权移居海外。

And, like, oh, I have enough money in my bank account to transfer it onto my British card because I had enough privilege to move overseas.

我买得起的所有贝果，选择外带而不是在家制作，结果掉在了街上。

And all the bagel that I could afford, getting it takeaway rather than having to make it at home fell on the street.

然后我得面对一只正在吃我贝果的狗，哎呀，我的天啊。

And this I gotta meet a dog who was eating my bagel and, like, oh, my friends.

我有个朋友约了我，我却迟到了，唉，我真是太惨了。

I've my friend who has made plans with me I'm late to and, like, woe is me.

我当时就想，我现在正处在糟糕的一天里。

And I was just like, I'm in a bad day right now.

我只是对这件事想得太多了。

Like, I'm reading way too much into this.

我把自己当成受害者，投入了太多情感，但实际上，那些我以为是当天最糟糕的事情，其实都是特权，都是些别人求之不得的小小不便。

And I am investing too much in my identity here as a victim when actually, like, all of those things that I've experienced that I thought were, like, the worst things that were gonna happen to me that day are just, like, privileges and are just wonderful things that I don't know, people would kill to have those inconveniences.

所以当你发现自己在毁掉自己的一天时，要意识到这一点，并试着把自己拉出来。

So just recognize when you're ruining your own day and just try and pull yourself out of it.

第16条，再简单说一条：按时按量服药。

Number 16, another quick one, take your medications regularly and as scheduled.

无论是抗生素、抗抑郁药、扑热息痛止痛药，还是医生开给你的任何药，都要听从医嘱。

And that goes for antibiotics, antidepressants, Panadol pain relief, anything prescribed to you by a doctor, listen to them.

额外提醒，16.2。

And bonus, 16.2.

去看过牙医吧。

Just go to the dentist.

去看过牙医吧。

Go to the dentist.

你知道你必须去。

You know you need to.

我拖了六年才去看牙医，我很羞于承认这一点。

I put off going to the dentist for six years, and I'm ashamed to admit that.

但这是因为上一次我去的时候，真的特别疼。

But it's because the last time I went, it really hurt.

我当时非常害怕。

And I was really scared.

猜猜怎么着？

And guess what?

去年我去的时候，猜猜结果如何？

Guess what that got me when I went last year?

做了七个补牙，花了3000美元的牙科治疗，如果我早点定期去，这些本来都可以避免的。

Seven fillings, $3,000 worth of dental work that could have been avoided if I just went more regularly.

你年纪越大，就越不会把健康视为理所当然，也越能意识到，有人为此接受了多年训练，成为专家，真正懂得该怎么做。

The older you get, the more you stop taking your health for granted, and the more you realize that there are people who train for many, many years to be experts in this and to know what they're doing.

听他们的建议，好好照顾自己。

Listen to them and take care of yourself.

按时服药。

Take your meds as scheduled.

去看牙医。

Go to the dentist.

17岁的时候，当有人对你刻薄或态度恶劣时，唯一能为你带来优势的防御方式，就是以极其友善的态度回应他们。

17, when somebody is mean to you or short with you, the best defense and the only def defense that will work in your favor is to be disgustingly kind back.

我是通过不断尝试和犯错才学会这一点的。

And I learned this through trial and error.

但以前当别人对我刻薄，或者当你知道有人故意说些刺耳的话，想激怒你、让你不舒服，还以为你没察觉，想打压你时，我以前总会有一些反应。

But when people were, like, used to be mean to me, or you know when people make those slight jabs, like, they're trying to get under your skin and they think you don't notice, and they're trying to, like, bring you down a peg, I used to get quite I wouldn't say mad, but I would just I would have a certain reaction.

我会避开他们，或者试图回击，或者想让别人看清他们是什么样的人。

Like, I would either avoid them or, like, I would try and be smart back or I would, like, try and make other people realise what kind of person they were.

后来我才明白，你所能做的最好的事——我在我们关于如何不把事情放在心上的那一集中也提到过——就是对他们极其友善、宽容和大度，让他们别无选择，只能面对一面镜子，清楚地看到自己行为有多么奇怪、恶心和糟糕。

And then I just realised the best thing that you can do, and I talked about this in our episode on how to not take things personally, is just to be so nice and so kind and so generous and so forgiving with them that they have, like, no choice but just to have this mirror placed in front of them that makes them directly see how weird and gross and terrible their behavior is.

这并不意味着放任。

This doesn't mean permissive.

我不是说你要继续让他们留在你的生活中，继续让他们欺负你，继续向他们妥协。

I don't mean you have to continue to let them in your life and continue to let them walk all over you and continue to give in to them.

要善良。

Be kind.

要友好。

Be nice.

但仍要设定界限。

Still set boundaries.

但这确实是我们在心理上能做的最有力的事情之一，能直接切断别人的残忍行为，让他们不再认为他们可以这样对待你，不再认为他们的行为没什么问题。

But it is genuinely, like, one of the most powerful things that we can do psychologically to just cut cut someone's cruelty off and to just essentially stop them from, yeah, thinking that they can treat you that way and thinking that their behavior isn't a problem.

第18条，你不需要帮助每个人。

Number 18, you don't need to help everybody.

我知道，很多这些建议都是关于要善良、慷慨、友好、原谅、做个好朋友。

I know that, like, a lot of these tips have been like, be kind, be generous, be nice, forgive, be a good friend.

有些人就是不值得这样。

Somebody some people just don't deserve that.

有些人根本不值得你帮助。

Some people just don't deserve your help.

作为好朋友，作为你所在群体、部落或社区的合格成员，关键在于明白你无法给予每个人你所有的一切。

And part of being a good friend, part of being a good member of the village, member of the tribe, the community that you're in, is knowing that you can't give everybody everything that you have.

而你所能做的最慷慨的事之一，就是先照顾好自己，这样你才能真正为那些真正值得你付出的人出现，而不是为了每个人做善事、把自己暴露给所有人、无休止地答应所有请求，直到精疲力尽。

And that one of the most generous things that you can do is to take care of yourself first, that so that you can show up for the people who really deserve you, rather than doing favors for everybody, you know, putting yourself out there for everybody, saying yes to everybody to the point of exhaustion.

当真正需要为那些会同样回报你的人提供支持时，你却因过度消耗而无力做到。

And when the time really comes to be there for those who would do the same things back for you, being so burnt out that you're not able to do that.

我觉得这是一个在特定情境下才会学到的深刻教训，尤其是当你极度独立，或是长女、高成就型长女这类人时。

And I feel like this is a very specific lesson that you learn in specific circumstances, especially if you are very hyperindependent, especially if you are an eldest daughter or an eldest daughter high achiever type.

最终你会明白，有些人并不需要你的帮助——不是因为他们不配得到任何人的帮助，而是因为你的精力和时间是宝贵的资源。

Eventually, you learn that there are some people who just don't need your help, not because they don't deserve help from anybody, but because you and your energy and your time is a precious resource.

与此类似的是第19条教训：相信你的直觉，知道何时该说不，何时不该去参加派对，何时不该帮你朋友实现那些疯狂的想法。

Similar to this is lesson number 19, trust your gut when to say no, when to not go to the party, when to not help your friend with some crazy idea they have.

当然，你希望做个好朋友，也想回馈他人，但有些事情你完全可以理直气壮地说：我没时间做这个。

Obviously, like, you wanna be a good friend and you wanna give back, but there are just some things where you're allowed to just be like, I don't have time for that.

尤其是当对方永远不会为你做同样的事，还让你不断因他们从不回报而心生怨恨时，这明显就是他们在占你便宜。

And especially when it's for people who would never do the same thing for you in return, and who you resent constantly for not returning the favor, that is a sign that, like, they're taking advantage.

退一步，不必对他们倾尽所有，说‘不’，这完全没问题。

And it's okay to just it's okay to just take a step back and to not give them everything you've got and to say no.

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不妨听听《No Grip》这个新播客，它深入探讨赛车界最令人向往的赛事背后的文化。

Look no further than No Grip, a new podcast tackling the culture of motor racing's most coveted series.

我是莉莉·赫尔曼，和我一起深入挖掘F1中那些鲜少被触及的领域，包括

Join me, Lily Herman, as we dive into the underexplored pockets of f one, including

当前车手阵容的星象学。

the astrology of the current grid.

刘易斯·汉密尔顿，摩羯座太阳，巨蟹座月亮。

Lewis Hamilton, Capricorn sun, Cancer moon.

你信不信？

Wouldn't you know it?

迈克尔·舒马赫也是摩羯座太阳，巨蟹座月亮。

Michael Schumacher is also a Capricorn son, Cancer moon.

这项运动中最具影响力的一次车手罢工事件。

The story of the sport's most consequential driver strike.

我们有一个男人，当他听说

We have one man who upon hearing

自己将被解雇时，惊慌失措，竟然从浴室的窗户爬了出去。

that he was going to be fired, freaked out, and apparently climbed out the window of the bathroom.

丹尼尔·里卡多的一级方程式职业生涯是一段成功故事、一个警示故事，还是两者的结合？

And was Daniel Riccardo's f one career a success story, a cautionary tale, or some combination of both?

他开始获得大量关注，或许也开始认为，我比这更重要。

He started getting all this attention, and he maybe started to think, I'm bigger than this.

我更优秀。

I'm better.

还有许多其他事故、丑闻和纷争，让一级方程式赛车在过去七十多年里成为一场令人着迷又堕落的灾难。

And plenty of other mishaps, scandals, and sagas that have made Formula one a delightful, decadent dumpster fire for more than seventy five years.

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple 播客或你收听播客的任何平台收听本节目。

Listen to no grip on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

2023 年，一个故事在英国引发震惊与难以置信。

In 2023, a story gripped The UK, evoking horror and disbelief.

本应负责照顾婴儿的护士

The nurse who should have been

如今却成为现代英国历史上最猖獗的儿童杀手。

in charge of caring for tiny babies is now the most prolific child killer in modern British history.

每个人都以为他们知道结局如何。

Everyone thought they knew how it ended.

一个判决？

A verdict?

一个恶人。

A villain.

一位名叫露西·莱特比的护士。

A nurse named Lucy Letby.

露西·莱特比已被判有罪。

Lucy Letby has been found guilty.

但如果我们没听到完整的故事呢？

But what if we didn't get the whole story?

当你一看见

The moment you look at the

整个画面，这个案子就站不住脚了。

whole picture, the case collapses.

我是阿曼达·诺克斯。

I'm Amanda Knox.

在新播客《质疑：露西·莱特比案》中，我们将追踪证据，倾听亲历者的声音，探究当全世界决定露西·莱特比是谁时，究竟发生了什么。

And in the new podcast, Doubt the Case of Lucy Letby, we follow the evidence and hear from the people that lived it to ask what really happened when the world decided who Lucy Letby was.

不允许表达任何怀疑或质疑。

No voicing of any skepticism or doubt.

这会在英国体制的每一个层面造成巨大伤害，这是错误的。

It'll cause so much harm at every single level of the British establishment that this is wrong.

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple 播客或你收听播客的任何平台收听《怀疑：露西·莱特比案》。

Listen to doubt, the case of Lucy Letby on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

你好。

Hi.

我是乔·温斯坦，播客《灵性女儿》的主持人，我们在这里讨论占星术、星盘以及如何活出最充满活力的人生。

This is Jo Winterstein, host of the spirit daughter podcast, where we talk about astrology, natal charts, and how to step into your most vibrant life.

我刚刚和一位迷你司机坐下来聊了聊。

And I just sat down with a mini driver.

爱尔兰旅行者说，当我16岁的时候，你会在男人身上经历一段艰难时光。

The Irish traveler said when I was 16, you're gonna have

你会在男人身上经历一段艰难时光。

a terrible time with men.

演员、讲故事的人，以及毫不妥协的水瓶座先知。

Actor, Actor, storyteller, and unapologetic Aquarian visionary.

水瓶座崇尚自由和不同的视角。

Aquarius is all about freedom loving and different perspectives.

我发现很多水星强烈落在水瓶座的人，常常被误解。

And I find a lot of people with strong placements in Aquarius, like, are misunderstood.

她第七宫的太阳和金星激发了她对伴侣关系的非传统态度。

A sun and Venus in Aquarius in her seventh house spark her unconventional approach to partnership.

他真的教会了我接纳人们睡在不同的房间、不同的房子、不同的地方，只是全然接纳一切的本来面目。

He really has taught me to embrace people sleeping in different rooms, on different houses, in different places, but just an embracing of the isness of it all.

如果你正在经历自己的转变，或者只是想从一个领先艺术家的角度了解她如何将占星、创意与现实生活融合，这一集绝对不容错过。

If you're navigating your own transformation or just want a chart side view into how a leading artist integrates astrology, creativity, and real life, this episode is a must listen.

请于2月24日起在iHeartRadio应用、Apple Podcast或您收听播客的任何平台收听《Spirit Daughter》播客。

Listen to the spirit daughter podcast starting on February 24 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your podcast.

我是克莱顿·内卡德，2022年，

I'm Clayton Neckard, and in 2022,

我是ABC电视台《单身汉》节目的主角。

I was the lead of ABC's The Bachelor.

不幸的是，事情并没有按计划进行。

Unfortunately, it didn't go according to plan.

他成为了历史上首位被拒绝最终玫瑰的单身汉。

He became the first bachelor to ever have his final rose rejected.

互联网上的人们开始对他群起而攻之。

The internet turned on him.

如果我能按下一个按钮让一切重来，我会这么做。

If I could press a button and rewind it all, I would.

但克雷顿在节目结束后发生的事情引发了更大的轰动。

But what happened to Clayton after the show made even bigger headlines.

这一切始于一夜情，最终却走向法庭，克雷顿卷入了一场非常奇特的亲子丑闻。

It began as a one night stand and ended in a courtroom, with Clayton at the center of a very strange paternity scandal.

媒体来了。

-The media is here.

这个案子已经 viral 了。

This case has gone viral.

约会合同。

The dating contract.

同意和我约会，但我同时要起诉你。

Agree to date me, but I'm also suing you.

请签发搜查令。

Please search warrant.

这我以前从未见过。

This is unlike anything I've ever seen before.

我是斯蒂芬妮·杨。

I'm Stephanie Young.

这是《爱的囚笼》。

This is Love Trapped.

本季，一场关于他说、她说，以及在谎言之海中寻求责任的史诗级对决。

This season, an epic battle of he said, she said, and the search for accountability in a sea of lies.

我什么都没做，只是和那个单身汉怀了孩子。

I have done nothing except get pregnant by the bachelor.

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple 播客或你常用的任何播客平台收听《Love Trapped》。

Listen to Love Trapped on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

嗨。

Hey.

我是杰·谢蒂，《On Purpose》播客的主持人。

I'm Jay Shetty, host of the On Purpose Podcast.

我今天邀请到了卢克·康布斯，这位获奖的乡村音乐艺人，是当今音乐界最真实的声音之一。

I'm joined by Luke Combs, award winning country music artist one of the most authentic voices in music today.

卢克坦诚分享了关于成功、自我怀疑、心理健康，以及当你的生活一夜巨变时，如何真正保持本真的故事。

Luke opens up about success, self doubt, mental health, and what it really takes to stay true to who you are when your life changes overnight.

我讨厌名气。

I hate fame.

我讨厌‘名人’这个词。

I hate the word celebrity.

我讨厌这些词。

I hate those words.

它们让我感到不舒服。

They make me uncomfortable.

但我觉得，当你达到某种程度时，名气、成功或影响力只会放大和加剧你原本就有的性格。

But I think when you get to a certain point, the fame or the success or the influence, it just accentuates and exacerbates the inherent person that you are.

那个总说他会一直在、会为到场做任何事的人，反而是唯一不在的人。

The guy that says he's always gonna be there and that will do anything to be there is the only guy that's not there.

博出生时，我在澳大利亚。

I'm in Australia when Bo was born.

我的全部身份认同就是，无论发生什么，我都会把妻子和孩子放在工作之前。

My whole identity is that no matter what, I'm gonna prioritize my wife and my children over my job.

我害怕和儿子的那场对话。

I dread the conversation with my son.

你觉得你会说什么？

What do you think you'd say?

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple Podcast 或你收听播客的任何平台收听 Jay Shetty 的《有目的》。

Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.

第二十条教训。

Lesson number 20.

你确实会因为多运动、少喝酒而感觉更好，这真让人沮丧。

You do actually feel better when you exercise more and drink less, which sucks.

你看，我喜欢酒精——我喜欢酒精。

See, I like alc- I like I like alcohol.

是的。

I do.

我喜欢酒精。

I like alcohol.

我也喜欢运动。

I also I like I like exercising.

但我希望我不用像现在这样频繁地做这些事，或者我希望我能每周去一次健身房，每晚都喝酒，然后感觉棒极了。

But I wish I didn't have to do them as much as I do, or I wish I wish that, like, I could go to the gym, like, once a week and drink every night and feel amazing.

但你的身体根本不是这样的。

And it's just not how your body is.

对吧？

Right?

当我年轻的时候，特别是十七八九岁上大学时，我们经常狂饮。

When I was definitely when I was younger, when I was, like, 17, 18, 19, and I was at university, I would, like we would we were, like, binge drinking.

我们几乎每晚都喝酒，没人觉得有什么不对。

We were, like, drinking every single night, and nobody was blinking an eye.

我们每周只会去跑个五公里，或者玩一次飞盘。

And we would, like, go on, like, one five k run or, like, play some, like, frisbee once a week.

我记得那时候总在想：为什么我这么累？

And I remember being like, oh, why do I feel so tired?

为什么我总是精疲力尽？

And, like, why am I exhausted all the time?

为什么我觉得自己这么恶心？

And why do I feel disgusting?

后来，随着这些习惯越来越难维持，也越来越让我反感，我开始慢慢重新加入运动，意识到周一和朋友喝酒其实并不健康，那时我才恍然大悟。

And then slowly, like, as those habits became more and more difficult to maintain and more and more repulsive, and you start adding some exercise back in and you start realizing that drinking every drinking on a Monday with your pals is probably not healthy, I was like, wow.

我实际上感觉更好了。

I actually feel better.

我的习惯确实反映了我希望过上的生活质量以及我想如何生活。

And my habits do are a reflection of, like, the quality of life that I want and how I wanna live my life.

这无疑是一个重要的教训，只是我希望它不是真的。

So that's definitely been an important lesson, one that I wish wasn't true.

但不幸的是，它确实是。

But unfortunately is.

你确实会感觉好很多。

You do feel a lot better.

我们来聊个完全不同的方向，第二十一条建议：在冲动消费前等二十四小时。

To go on a completely different direction here, lesson 21, wait twenty four hours before making an impulse purchase.

我觉得这些都是一些关于学习自控力、理解什么是财务上、情感上和身体上健康的小贴士。

I feel like these are all tips of just, like, learning impulse control and learning what it means to be healthy financially, emotionally, physically.

我大概在二十二三岁、刚找到第一份像样的工作时，有过严重的冲动购物问题。

I had a real impulse shopping problem when I was probably, like, twenty two, twenty three, in my, like, early twenties when I first got, like, a a proper job.

我会买一些最荒谬的东西，因为看到后就觉得需要，而且现在有了成年人的收入，就能随便买。

And I would just buy the most ridiculous stuff because I would see it, think I needed it, and because I now had access to adult money, I could just buy it.

说实话，我想过自己浪费在多双黑色牛仔裤上，或者那些根本没人需要的傻气玩意儿上的钱有多少。

And genuinely, like, I think about how much money I wasted on multiple pairs of black jeans or just, like, silly things that nobody needs.

在所有你可能听到的冲动购物建议和预算技巧中，这是我做得最好的一件事。

Now this was the best thing I did for all the impulse shopping tips that you may get, for all the budgeting tips.

如果我想要某样东西，觉得立刻就需要，那就必须等二十四小时才能做决定。

If there is something I want and I feel like I immediately need it, twenty four hours twenty four hours before I can make the decision.

我想我之前已经提到过这一点。

And I think I've spoken about this before.

我手机里有一个清单。

I have a list in my phone.

往往等到二十四小时到了，我已经忘了这回事。

Often by the time I get to that twenty four hour mark, I've forgotten about it.

那种由多巴胺带来的购物冲动、收货时的兴奋感，就像一层迷雾，会慢慢消散，让我能更好地自我调节。

And, like, the haze of, like, the emotional pull of dopamine, of of buying something and getting it delivered, and, like, that kind of fades a little bit, and I can kind of self regulate.

我也觉得，冲动消费、酗酒、对所有人都说好，这三个建议往往都是逃避的表现。

I also feel like impulse dropping, drinking, saying yes to everybody, those last three tips, often those are forms of avoidance.

我确实发现了这一点。

I've definitely found that.

因此，学会在不依赖这些方式的情况下调节情绪，随着年龄增长，这一点变得越来越重要。

And so learning how to regulate your emotions without those things, the older you get, the more important that becomes.

第二十二课：多和你的兄弟姐妹聊聊。

Lesson 22, talk to your siblings more.

说实话，我发现我和姐妹们年龄差距很大，而且我搬出去的时候她们还很小，大概只有12岁和10岁，那时她们还是孩子。

Honestly, I I found that because me and my sisters had such an age difference and because I moved out, when they were so young, like, I think they were, like, 12 and 10, like, they were still children.

我甚至不记得自己10岁时的事了。

I don't even have, like, memories from when I was 10.

我根本没有和她们建立起她们彼此之间那样的关系，很长一段时间里，我对此非常嫉妒。

I just didn't form a the relationship with them that they form with each other, and I was very, very jealous of that for a long time.

这明显反映在我和她们的关系中——我总觉得自己被排除在外，而作为年长的兄长，这种感觉让我觉得自己很软弱。

And it definitely was reflected in, like, my relationship with them where I would I just felt very left out, and that felt weak because I was the older I was the older sibling.

我当时想当个酷酷的哥哥，每次回去，他们都不怎么想理我。

Like, I meant to be the cool one, I would go back, and they wouldn't really want anything to do with me.

有好几年我都想，行吧，无所谓。

And for a couple of years, was like, well, fine.

我就只跟我的朋友们混在一起。

I'm just gonna hang out with my friends.

我和我姐妹们根本没有多少关系。

And I didn't really have a relationship with my sisters.

但我觉得去年，我开始更多地见到她们，也开始意识到兄弟姐妹的关系有多重要，她们就像是与生俱来、棒极了的最好的朋友。

And then I think last year, I really started seeing them more, and I started realizing what an important relationship the sibling relationship is, and how they are just like an inbuilt, amazing, cool best friend.

你们之间能以一种非常美好、简单、无拘无束的方式彼此理解。

And just the you just relate to them on such a beautiful, simplistic, carefree level.

我开始真正欣赏我姐妹们的个性，以及她们身上那些我特别喜欢、觉得超酷的地方。

And I think I started to really appreciate, like, my sisters' personalities and all the things about them that are so cool and that I love.

现在我经常和她们聊天，这对我来说是巨大的、巨大的福气，也是过去一年里最大的收获。

And now I talk to them all the time, and that has been a huge, huge blessing for me, and, like, just a huge a huge gain in the past year.

所以如果我能回到三年前，我会赶紧给他们打电话。

So if I was to go back three years, I'd be like, freaking call them.

周末给他们打电话。

Call them on the weekends.

发消息给他们。

Like, text them.

建立一段关系。

Have a relationship.

我后悔没有早点投入这段关系，我觉得我在摸索自己的青春期后期和二十岁出头的时光时太自私了，错过了他们很多青少年时期。

I I regret not investing in that sooner, and I feel like I missed a lot of their teen years trying to figure out my late teen years and my early twenties and being really selfish with it.

而现在，当我重新回到他们的生活时，他们却正要离开，我只希望我们的关系能在这种变化中保持牢固，因为这真是一种独特而珍贵的关系。

And now I feel like I've orbited back around right as they are orbiting out, and I just hope that our relationship stays strong within that because it is just such a beautiful, one of a kind, special relationship.

第二十三课。

Lesson 23.

为自己庆祝。

Celebrate yourself.

不要害怕为那些让你自豪的事情大肆庆祝，即使别人不会替你这么做。

Don't be afraid to make a big deal out of the things that you're proud of, even if nobody else is going to do it for you.

给自己办个生日派对。

Throw the birthday party for yourself.

为了你的升职，组织一场与朋友的聚餐。

Organize the dinner with your friends for your job promotion.

为那些对你来说重要的事大肆庆祝。

Make a big deal out of what feels like a big deal for you.

想想看，我的孩子们以前总是习惯我们的父母如此关心我们的生活，比如我们的学校，或者像导师、姨妈、祖父母那样为我们庆祝。

Think, oh, my children were so used to our parents being so in our business, or, like, our school or whatever it is, like, mentor, aunts, grandparents, celebrating us.

但当你长大后，你才意识到，有时候你必须为自己这么做。

And then you get older and you realize, like, sometimes you've gotta do that for yourself.

人们需要一个理由来庆祝。

And people want an excuse to party.

人们需要一个理由为你感到高兴。

People want an excuse to be excited for you.

我以前总会觉得有点尴尬，想着：我要给自己办个生日派对，或者我要庆祝一下这件事。

I would always feel a little bit cringe being like, oh, I'm gonna plan, like, a birthday party, or, like, I'm gonna plan like, I wanna celebrate this.

但现在我对此不再感到任何羞耻。

And I and now I don't feel any shame about it.

拥有这样一个空间，邀请别人走进我的回忆，知道我将来回望这些美好的时刻时，他们也会在这些记忆里，这非常重要，也极其珍贵。

And having that space to invite people into my memories and knowing that I'm gonna look back at those really cool things and they're gonna be in those memories with me, that is so important and that is so valuable.

我觉得，庆祝自己这件事，我们做得太少了，我们没有足够重视活着本身所带来的快乐、惊喜和美好。

And I just feel like celebrating yourself, we don't do it enough, and we don't make a big deal out of what a pleasure and a surprise and a beautiful thing it is to be alive.

我们付出了巨大的努力，完成了许多了不起的事情，这些是年轻时的自己根本无法想象的。

And the fact that we work really hard and we do really cool things, things that younger you could not have imagined you doing.

你有权利成为自己最大的粉丝和最热情的啦啦队，为他人创造空间，让他们愿意与你一同分享这份喜悦。

You were allowed to just be your biggest fan and your biggest cheerleader and make the space for other people to enter into that with you if they want to.

如果他们不愿意，也没关系。

And if they don't, that's okay.

你还能多分一块蛋糕。

You get more cake.

你还能得到更多香槟。

You get more champagne.

你还能得到更多鲜花。

You get more flowers.

确保你为自己把重要时刻过得隆重些。

Make sure you make your big moments big for yourself.

第二十四课：你可以真正亲手打造你的梦想生活。

Lesson 24, you can truly DIY your dream life.

只要你下定决心学习如何自己动手做事，先做得很差，再好一点，然后做到不错，最后做到出色。

If you just commit to learning how to do things for yourself and learning how to do them badly, then a bit better, then good, then amazingly.

这简直就是秘诀。

This is like the the hack.

这是每个人都需要知道的生活窍门。

This is the life hack that everybody needs to know.

如果你想做点什么，天哪。

If you wanna do something oh my god.

我说出来现在都觉得这听起来很傻。

I'm this sounds stupid now that I'm saying it.

但如果你想要做某事，你就应该去做。

But if you wanna do something, you should just do it.

你应该尽可能简单、轻松地去做，然后慢慢进步。

And you should just do it as simply and easily as you can possibly do at that point, and then get better.

我认识的每一个真正成功、让我非常钦佩、现在能称作朋友的人，都是抱着这种‘靠自己’的态度开始的：没人会把这送给我。

Everybody I know who is really successful and who I really admire, who I now get to call my friends, just went into it with this, like, do it myself attitude of being like, nobody's gonna hand this to me.

没人会把我要的生活钥匙交给我。

Nobody's gonna give me the keys to the life I want.

没人会为我建造我想拥有的家，或为我打造我想从事的职业。

Nobody's gonna build the home I want for myself or the career I want for myself.

我必须靠自己去做。

I have to do it myself.

我必须参加那些会议，必须发那些邮件，主动冷邮件联系别人，看看他们有没有适合我的机会。

And I have to, like, be in those meetings, and I have to be in those emails, cold emailing somebody to see if they have an opportunity for me.

我需要自己创造产品、创办自己的事业、制作自己的播客，宇宙会回报这种努力。

And I need to be creating my own product, creating my own business, creating my own podcast, and the universe will reward that.

我觉得这和之前那个建议很相似，就是单纯为了做而做。

And I think it's similar to that previous tip of, like, do things just for the the sake of it.

体验艰苦的努力，仅仅因为当你投身于自己在乎的事情时，艰苦的努力本身会让你感到愉悦。

Experience hard effort just because hard effort is enjoyable for you when you're doing something you care about.

这和这一点非常相似。

This is very similar to this.

当你真正意识到，你可以自己动手，用最原始的方式、手头任何可用的工具，从零开始打造你梦想的生活时，你的生活会彻底改变。

When you truly realize that you can DIY, do it yourself, make it from scratch your dream life in the most rudimentary way possible in whatever using whatever tools you have possible, your life seriously changes.

我不喜欢炫耀，但我确实觉得我的人生中有一些时刻就是这一点的证明——比如，我没看到适合我的工作。

And I I don't like bragging, but I do feel like there's points in my like, my life is kind of evidence of that where don't I know, I just didn't see a job for me.

我没找到让我喜欢的体系，于是我想，好吧。

I didn't see a system that I enjoyed, and I was like, okay.

那我就自己创造一个。

Well, I'll just make it myself.

如果成功了，那就太好了。

And if it works out, great.

太棒了。

Amazing.

显然，这正是我想要的。

Obviously, that's what I want.

如果没成功，至少我可以说我做到了。

And if it doesn't, at least I can say that I did it.

至少我知道，机会并不是在那里等着我出现，等着我准备好。

At least I know that the opportunity wasn't out there waiting for me to arrive, waiting for me to get to the point where I was ready.

第二十五课。

Lesson 25.

其实我觉得这一条应该放在前面，但我把它偷偷加在最后了。

I actually think this one should have been before, but I'm sneaking it in at the end.

二十五。

25.

并不是你约会的每个人都是你的灵魂伴侣，但这并不意味着这段关系不值得。

Not every person you date is your soul mate, And it doesn't mean the relationship wasn't worth worthwhile.

此外，当你二十多岁的时候，尽可能多地去约会。

Additionally, when you are in your twenties, date as much as possible.

我觉得我通过自己的经历，以及我见过的那些只和一个人约会的人，学到了这一点，他们当时觉得：好吧，还不错。

I feel like I've learnt this both through myself and through other people I've seen who have dated one person and been like, okay, cool.

这看起来已经足够好了。

That seems like good enough.

然后七八年后，才意识到：天啊。

And then seven, eight years later, been like, oh my god.

我实际上从未体验过外面还有些什么。

I actually never got to experience what else was out there.

我知道不是每个人都同意这一点，人们对此有不同的看法，但尽管我的心被伤了很多次，我前几天还在反思：那些我完全忘记的男生们。

And I know not everybody agrees with this and people have different, you know, perspectives on it, but as much as my heart was broken many times, and I was literally reflecting on this the other day, like, all these guys I completely forgot about.

尽管被他们伤害、被他们拒绝真的让我很痛，但我非常庆幸自己经历了这些。

And as much as, like, it really hurt to be hurt by them and to be rejected by them, I'm so glad I did it.

他们每个人都教会了我重要的道理。

And they all taught me important lessons.

我经历的每一段关系，即使是灾难性的，都是值得的，因为它们给了我那些本可能被无数‘如果’困扰的经历。

And every single relationship that I've had, even the ones that were a disaster, have been worthwhile because they brought me experiences that I otherwise would have had of a lot of what ifs swirling around.

我知道，我又觉得这么说有点奇怪，因为我知道有些人可能会误解，以为我只是为了约会而约会，把别人当经验工具。

I know again, I feel weird saying this because I know people might take it the wrong way of, like, just date for the sake of dating and, like, use other people for experience.

不是的。

No.

我只是说，要勇敢地走出去。

I'm just saying put yourself out there.

即使你不太确定这个人是不是对的人，也给他们一个机会，享受彼此，一起体验生活，哪怕只有两周、两年、二十年，从真正关心他人、与他们创造重要回忆中汲取经验，即使你知道这段关系不会永远持续。

And even if you're not entirely sure if this person is or isn't the one, give them a chance, have fun, experience each other, experience life together, even if that's for two weeks, two years, twenty years, and take the experiences you can get from really caring about somebody else, really having important memories with them, even if you know it's not gonna be forever.

我还有两个最终的教训，一个滑稽的，一个认真的。

I have two final lessons, a silly one and a serious one.

我们先说那个滑稽的。

Let's start with the silly one.

这辈子至少染一次头发。

Dye your hair at least once in your life.

试试奇怪的发型，即使你觉得或者知道它会很难看。

Try a weird hairstyle, even if you think slash know that it's gonna be ugly.

我强烈推荐这样做。

I cannot recommend this enough.

我曾经把头发染成黑色。

I have dyed my hair black.

那是个糟糕的决定。

That was a terrible decision.

我漂染头发的次数多到数不清，而且常常和我当时的情绪状态有关。

I have dyed my I've bleached my hair more times than I can think of, and it was often related to how I was emotionally doing at that point.

但我确实做过很多疯狂又愚蠢的头发造型，我不知道怎么说。

But, like, I have just done the craziest, stupidest things to my hair, and I think I don't know.

我觉得这很有趣。

I think it's fun.

我认为这更像是一种更广泛的隐喻，意味着在人生中愿意尝试任何事情，去大胆地试一试。

And I I think it's like a broader metaphor for, like, just being willing to try anything once in life and just to give it just to give it a go.

这很好地体现了这一点。

It's a great reflection of that.

如果你还没试过，那你一定要去试试。

And I think if you haven't done it, you've got to do it.

我上一次染发已经好一段时间了，但我在2023年的时候把头发染成了黑色。

And when I did it last, I haven't dyed my hair for a while, but I dyed my hair black in, like, 2023.

我是金发。

I'm blonde.

那是个糟糕的决定。

It was a terrible decision.

我看起来真的很难看。

I I really look terrible.

说实话，我很庆幸没人指出，但其实我并不庆幸。

Like, I would I'm glad nobody said something, but I really slash I'm not glad.

我还在犹豫，是不是该有人把我拉到一边，告诉我：这颜色根本不适合你。

I I'm still on the fence as to whether somebody should have pulled me aside and be like, this is not the color for you.

但就是有一种独特的美感，以及回看那些照片时的那种特别感受——天啊，那真是个糟糕的发色。

But there's just, like, this unique beauty and like this unique feeling of of looking back at those photos and being like, god, that was a terrible hair color.

天啊，那真是个糟糕的造型，但我非常庆幸我做了这件事。

God, that was like an awful style, but I'm so glad I'm so glad that I did it.

我很庆幸自己尝试了。

I'm so glad that like I gave it a shot.

现在，等我有了孩子，我希望我能说：是的。

Now when I have kids, hopefully, I can be like, yeah.

那是那一年的标志性事件。

That was the that was the year of this.

所以，那就是那一年的主题。

So that was the year of that.

发型、这种表达方式，以及凡事都尝试一次，都与精彩的故事紧密相连，它们承载着美好的回忆，体现了一种对生活开放无畏的态度，而这种态度每年都在变得更加珍贵。

And it just feels like hairstyle and that expression and doing everything once is really tied to a good story, and it's tied to having good memories and having that kind of free fall openness to life that feels more and more worthwhile every single year.

想听听关于一级方程式的不同视角吗？

Ready for a different take on Formula one?

不妨关注一下《No Grip》这个新播客，它深入探讨赛车运动最令人向往的系列赛事背后的文化。

Look no further than No Grip, a new podcast tackling the culture of motor racing's most coveted series.

我是莉莉·赫尔曼，让我们一起探索F1中那些被忽视的领域，包括星象学在

Join me, Lily Herman, as we dive into the underexplored pockets of f one, including the astrology of

当前车手阵容中的体现。

the current grid.

刘易斯·汉密尔顿，摩羯座太阳，巨蟹座月亮。

Lewis Hamilton, Capricorn sun, Cancer moon.

你信不信？

Wouldn't you know it?

迈克尔·舒马赫也是摩羯座太阳，巨蟹座月亮。

Michael Schumacher is also a Capricorn son, Cancer moon.

这个故事是

The story of

这项运动历史上最具影响力的车手罢工事件。

the sport's most consequential driver strike.

我们有一位车手，听说自己要被解雇后，惊慌失措，竟然从洗手间的窗户爬了出去。

We have one man who upon hearing that he was going to be fired, freaked out, and apparently climbed out the window of the bathroom.

丹尼尔·里卡多辉煌的一级方程式职业生涯，是一段成功故事、一个警示寓言，还是两者的结合？

And was Daniel Riccardo's illustrious f one career a success story, a cautionary tale, or some combination of both?

他开始获得大量关注，或许也开始认为自己是

He started getting all this attention, and he maybe started to think, I'm

比这更了不起的人。

bigger than this.

我更优秀。

I'm better.

还有许多其他丑闻、风波和闹剧，让一级方程式在过去七十多年里成为一场迷人而堕落的灾难。

And plenty of other mishaps, scandals, and sagas that have made Formula one a delightful, decadent dumpster dumpster fire for more than seventy five years.

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple 播客或你收听播客的任何平台收听《No Grip》。

Listen to no grip on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

你好。

Hi.

我是乔·温斯坦因，播客《灵性女儿》的主持人，我们在这里讨论占星术、星盘以及如何活出最充满活力的人生。

This is Jo Winterstein, host of the spirit daughter podcast, where we talk about astrology, natal charts, and how to step into your most vibrant life.

我刚刚和一位小车手坐下来聊了聊。

And I just sat down with a mini driver.

爱尔兰旅行者说，当我16岁的时候，你会在男人身上经历一段糟糕的时光。

The Irish traveler said when I was 16, you're gonna have

和男人相处会很艰难。

a terrible time with men.

演员、讲故事的人，以及毫不掩饰的水瓶座愿景家。

Actor, Actor, storyteller, and unapologetic Aquarian visionary.

水瓶座代表着热爱自由和独特的视角。

Aquarius is all about freedom loving and different perspectives.

我发现很多水星强烈落在水瓶座的人，常常被误解。

And I find a lot of people with strong placements in Aquarius, like, are misunderstood.

她的太阳和金星位于天秤座第七宫，赋予了她非传统的伴侣关系方式。

A sun and Venus in Aquarius in her seventh house spark her unconventional approach to partnership.

他真的

He really

教会了我接纳人们睡在不同的房间、不同的房子、不同的地方，只是全然接纳这一切的存在。

has taught me to embrace people sleeping in different rooms, on different houses, in different places, but just an embracing of the isness of it all.

如果你正在经历自己的转变，或者只是想从一个领先艺术家的角度了解她如何将占星术、创造力与现实生活融合，这一集必听。

If you're navigating your own transformation or just want a chart side view into how a leading artist integrates astrology, creativity, and real life, this episode is a must listen.

从2月24日起，在iHeartRadio应用、Apple Podcast或你收听播客的任何平台收听《Spirit Daughter》播客。

Listen to the spirit daughter podcast starting on February 24 on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your podcast.

2023年，一则故事在英国引发震惊与难以置信。

In 2023, a story gripped The UK, evoking horror and disbelief.

本应

The nurse who should have been

负责照顾婴儿的护士，如今成为现代英国历史上最猖獗的婴儿杀手。

in charge of caring for tiny babies is now the most prolific child killer in modern British history.

每个人都以为他们知道结局如何。

Everyone thought they knew how it ended.

一个判决？

A verdict?

一个恶人。

A villain.

一名叫露西·莱特比的护士。

A nurse named Lucy Letby.

露西·莱特比已被判有罪。

Lucy Letby has been found guilty.

但如果我们

But what if we

并没有听到完整的故事呢？

didn't get the whole story?

当你开始审视

The moment you look at the

整个画面，这个案子就会崩塌。

whole picture, the case collapses.

我是阿曼达·诺克斯。

I'm Amanda Knox.

在新的播客《疑点》中，关于露西·莱特比的案件，我们追踪证据，倾听亲历者的声音，探究当世界决定露西·莱特比是谁时，究竟发生了什么。

And in the new podcast, Doubt, the case of Lucy Letby, we follow the evidence and hear from the people that lived it to ask what really happened when the world decided who Lucy Letby was.

不允许有任何质疑或怀疑的声音。

No voicing of any skepticism or doubt.

这会在英国体制的每一个层面造成巨大伤害，因为这是错误的。

It'll cause so much harm at every single level of the British establishment that this is wrong.

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple 播客或您收听播客的任何平台收听《疑点》——露西·莱特比案。

Listen to doubt, the case of Lucy Letby on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

我是克莱顿·内卡德。

I'm Clayton Neckard.

2022年，

In 2022,

我曾是ABC电视台《单身汉》节目的主持人。

I was the lead of ABC's The Bachelor.

不幸的是，事情并没有按计划进行。

Unfortunately, it didn't go according to plan.

他成为了历史上首位被最终人选拒绝的单身汉。

He became the first bachelor to ever have his final rose rejected.

互联网上的舆论转向了他。

The Internet turned on him.

如果我能按下一个按钮让一切重来，我会这么做。

If I could press a button and rewind it all, I would.

但节目结束后，克莱顿的经历引发了更大的轰动。

-But what happened to Clayton after the show made even bigger headlines.

这一切始于一夜情，最终却走向法庭，克莱顿卷入了一场非常奇特的亲子丑闻。

It began as a one night stand and ended in a courtroom, with Clayton at the center of a very strange paternity scandal.

媒体都来了。

-The media is here.

这个案件已经 viral 了。

This case has gone viral.

恋爱合同。

The dating contract.

同意和我约会，但我同时要起诉你。

Agree to date me, but I'm also suing you.

请签发搜查令。

Please search warrant.

我从未见过这样的事情。

This is unlike anything I've ever seen before.

我是斯蒂芬妮·杨。

I'm Stephanie Young.

这是《爱的囚笼》。

This is Love Trapped.

本季讲述一场激烈的“他说、她说”之争，以及在谎言的海洋中寻求责任的历程。

This season, an epic battle of he said, she said, and the search for accountability in a sea of lies.

我什么都没做，只是和那位单身汉有了孩子。

I have done nothing except get pregnant by the bachelor.

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple 播客或您收听播客的任何平台收听《爱的陷阱》。

Listen to Love Trapped on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

嗨。

Hey.

我是杰·谢蒂，《有目的》播客的主持人。

I'm Jay Shetty, host of the On Purpose Podcast.

我今天邀请到了卢克·康布斯，这位获奖的乡村音乐艺人，是当今音乐界最真实的声音之一。

I'm joined by Luke Combs, award winning country music artist and one of the most authentic voices in music today.

卢克坦诚分享了关于成功、自我怀疑、心理健康，以及当你的生活一夜之间改变时，如何真正保持自我的真实。

Luke opens up about success, self doubt, mental health, and what it really takes to stay true to who you are when your life changes overnight.

我讨厌名气。

I hate fame.

我讨厌‘名人’这个词。

I hate the word celebrity.

我讨厌这些词。

I hate those words.

它们让我感到不舒服。

They make me uncomfortable.

但我觉得，当你达到某个阶段时，名气、成功或影响力只会放大和加剧你原本就有的本质。

But I think when you get to a certain point, the fame or the success or the influence, it just accentuates and exacerbates the inherent person that you are.

那个总说他会一直在、会为陪伴你做任何事的人，反而是那个从不出现的人。

The guy that says he's always gonna be there and that will do anything to be there is the only guy that's not there.

当博出生时，我在澳大利亚。

I'm in Australia when Beau was born.

我的全部认同就是，无论发生什么，我都会把妻子和孩子放在工作之前。

My whole identity is that no matter what, I'm gonna prioritize my wife and my children over my job.

我害怕和儿子的那场对话。

I dread the conversation with my son.

你

What do you

你觉得你会说什么？

think you'd say?

在 iHeartRadio 应用、Apple 播客或你常用的播客平台收听《有目的》与杰·沙蒂。

Listen to On Purpose with Jay Shetty on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

所以我意识到，我实际上会讲到第27课，比我答应你们的多了一课。

So I'm realizing I'm actually gonna finish on lesson 27, which is one more than I promised you.

但我认为，这是我对于明年充满希望的领悟，也是我目前正在学习的：你不必受苦。

But I think this is my hopeful takeaway from next year and the thing I'm currently learning, which is you don't have to suffer.

我知道，这和我们上一课相比确实非常严肃。

And I know that that's really it's very serious compared to our last last lesson.

但我意识到，我花了太长时间认为我的思维模式和生活状态是无法改变的。

But I think I just spent way too long thinking that how my brain was and how my life was was something I couldn't change.

我一直在做的那些事情，本质上是在自我 sabotaging，它们给我带来了本不该有的痛苦，让我变得不健康、不快乐，而我却觉得自己被它们囚禁了，因为这些事我一直都这么做。

And the things I kept doing that were honestly self sabotaging and that were causing me more pain than they should have and that were making me unhealthy and unhappy, like, I felt so imprisoned by them because that's how I'd always done things.

我越来越意识到，我的生活不必是糟糕的。

And I'm just realizing more and more, like, my life doesn't have to be bad.

我不必承受比作为活着的人自然会经历的更多痛苦。

I don't have to suffer more than what I'm already gonna naturally suffer just by being alive.

在很多方面，我都有选择。

And I have a choice in a lot of that.

我可以选择去接受心理治疗。

I have a choice to go to therapy.

我可以选择服药。

I have a choice to get on medication.

我可以选择改变心态，养成更健康的习惯。

I have a choice to change my mindset, to have healthier habits.

我可以选择优先处理或淡化生活中那些让我更艰难的人际关系和事物。

I have a choice to prioritize and deprioritize relationships and certain things in my life that are making my life harder.

我曾经长久地感觉，一切都被强加于我，我只能接受。

And I just felt for so long, like, everything was just being handed to me and I had to accept it.

也许我二十六岁那年最大的教训，以及希望在二十七岁也能继续领悟的是：这并不真实。

And maybe the biggest lesson from my twenty sixth year, and hopefully, again, my twenty seventh year, is that that is not true.

我可以选择摆脱那些让我受苦、我不再想要的环境、事物和行为模式。

And I can opt out of the circumstances and the things and the patterns of behavior that are making me suffer and that I don't want anymore.

这很难，很艰难，我确实找了很多借口，但现在的我只想过一种轻松的生活，希望尽可能无拘无束、没有压力，而不是追求忙碌、成功、张扬和喧闹的生活。

And it's hard and it's difficult and I definitely make a lot of excuses, but I'm at this point where I'm like, I wanna live a life of ease, and I wanna live a life of being as carefree and stress free free as possible, not as busy and successful and and brash and loud as possible.

我觉得这是一次巨大的优先级转变，也许你也在学习同样的教训，或者你需要听到这个教训。

And I just think that's been a huge massive priority change, and maybe that's a lesson that you're learning as well, or that's a lesson that you need to hear.

你不必受苦。

You don't have to suffer.

你不必承受比生活本身更重的痛苦。

You don't have to suffer more than life is gonna make you suffer.

这些是我二十六七岁所学到的教训。

Those are my 26, 27 lessons from twenty six years.

我希望它们能让你有所收获，让你产生共鸣。

I hope that they've, I don't know, taught you something that you've related to them.

也许它们让你感受到自己的经历被认可了。

Maybe it's validated an experience that you're having.

如果你是在Spotify上收听，并且坚持听到了这里，我想知道你的想法。

If you're listening on Spotify and you have made it this far, I wanna know.

请告诉我，在过去一年或最近六个月里，你学到的一个不在这个列表中的教训，你觉得其他人也可以从中受益。

Give me a lesson that you have learned in the past year, past six months, that wasn't on this list that you think other people could learn from.

我觉得每年都会有一些新的领悟突然出现在我脑海中，而我确实已经忘记了一些重要的教训。

I feel like every year, there's this new knowledge popping into my mind, and I I've definitely forgotten things that were important lessons.

但我非常想听听你们的想法，也想了解你们的经历。

But I'd love to hear from you guys, and I'd love to hear your experience.

请确保你已经订阅并关注了你正在收听的平台。

Make sure that you are subscribed, following wherever you are listening.

如果你在美国或加拿大，你可以在Netflix上收听这一集。

If you are in The US or Canada, you can listen to this episode on Netflix.

实际上，我是不是应该说，你可以在Netflix上观看这一集？

Actually, should I say you can watch this episode on Netflix.

我太习惯说‘收听’了，但在Netflix上你是可以观看的。

I'm so used to saying listen, but you can watch on Netflix.