如何停止过度思考：打破焦虑循环 第13天

你好。

Hi.

我是艾玛，一名持证婚姻与家庭治疗师，你正在收听《治疗简明指南》播客。

I'm Emma, a licensed marriage and family therapist, and you're listening to the Therapy in a Nutshell podcast.

我的使命是创作易于理解的教育内容，介绍任何人都可以在日常生活中使用的治疗技巧和主题。

It's my mission to create easy to understand educational content about therapeutic skills and topics that anyone can use in their daily life.

我希望这些节目能帮助你更深入地了解你的思维运作方式，以及你可以采取哪些行动来改善心理健康。

I hope these episodes bring you more insight into how your mind works and what actions you can take to improve your mental health.

每个播客节目都对应一个可以在《治疗简明指南》YouTube频道上找到的视频。

Each podcast episode comes from a corresponding video you can find on the Therapy in a Nutshell YouTube channel.

此外，这些播客仅用于教育目的，不能替代你从治疗师或其他医疗专业人员那里获得的建议或指导。

Also, these podcasts are educational and don't replace the advice or direction you may be receiving from a therapist or other health professional.

现在让我们进入今天的内容。

Now let's jump into today's skill.

嗨，艾玛。

Hey, Emma.

你为什么在拉那根绳子？

Why are pulling that rope?

你有没有试过推一下？

Have you ever tried pushing one?

好了，各位。

Alright, guys.

很抱歉开了个糟糕的玩笑，但谢谢你们让我短暂地回忆一下当夏令营辅导员的日子。

So sorry for the bad joke, but thank you for letting me reminisce on my days as a camp counselor for a second.

这根绳子能教会我们一些关于焦虑和焦虑想法的东西。

And this rope has something to teach us about our anxiety and our anxious thoughts.

我曾经有一位客户是位芭蕾舞者，而且她跳得非常好。

Now I once had a client who was a ballerina, and she was a really good one too.

她能在顶级水平上表演，但却深受焦虑困扰。

She would perform at top levels, but she struggled with anxiety.

每当下一部剧的角色即将公布时，她就会不断担心自己会被分配到什么角色，琢磨自己是否能拿到主角，反复回想自己过去的错误，怀疑自己是不是犯了太多错以至于主角给了别人，还会思考自己对导演说过的一切话，担心自己是否说过什么冒犯的话。

When when roles for the next production were about to be announced, she would worry and worry about what what part she would be given, and she would wonder if she would get the lead, and she would roommate over any past mistakes that she'd made, and she'd wonder if she'd messed up so much that they'd give the lead to someone else, and she'd think about everything she'd said to the production manager, she'd and wonder if there was anything she'd said that'd been offensive.

她还试图预测每位舞者会得到哪个角色。

And she also tried to predict which roles every dancer would get.

所以她会思考舞团里的每一位舞者，想象他们的优势，在脑海中构想出上百个角色，并把他们全部安排到各自的位置上。

So she'd think about every single dancer in her troupe, and she'd imagine their strengths, and in her head, she'd imagine like a 100 different roles, and she'd place them all in their positions.

然后她会把自己和他们比较，最初只关注他们的所有技能，同时放大自己的所有缺点。

And then she would compare herself to them, initially only noticing like all of their skills and highlighting all of her own flaws.

接着她又会反过来，过分关注自己的能力，然后挑出他们所有的缺点，她会为此持续数小时、数天，直到角色公布之前都沉浸其中。

And then she'd flip, and she'd obsess over her own abilities and then highlight all of their flaws, and she would literally obsess over this for hours, for days leading up to, like, when the role decisions were made.

这影响了她放松、与朋友相处或完成学业的能力。

And this interfered with her ability to relax, to hang out with friends, or to finish her schoolwork.

因此她感到压力重重、困惑不已。

So she felt stressed and confused.

她无法判断自己究竟是出色还是糟糕。

She couldn't figure out if she was amazing or awful.

她无法确定自己究竟是自信还是不自信，但她知道她必须显得自信。

She couldn't figure out if she was confident or insecure, and she knew that she like had to be confident.

所以每当恐惧的想法出现时，她都会努力对抗它，试图用积极思考或再次反复琢磨谁会得到每个角色来把它赶出脑海。

So if a fearful thought came up, she'd like struggle against it, like try to force it out of her head with positive thinking or with another round of obsessing over who would get each role.

她越努力去积极思考，就越感到压力，花在自己脑子里的时间也越多，焦虑感也越强。

And the more she tried to like think positive, the more stressed out she became and the more time she spent inside of her head and the more anxious she was.

她不再见朋友，情绪也变得更加低落。

She stopped seeing her friends and she became more depressed.

似乎她越努力，情况就越糟。

And it seemed like the harder she tried, the worse things got.

所以当她来找我时，她已经准备好放弃芭蕾了。

So by the time she came to see me, she was ready to quit ballet.

这就是我们许多人陷入的困境。

So here's the problem that many of us get trapped in.

我们大多数人一生中某个时候都会被困在自己的思绪里。

Most of us at some point in our lives get stuck in our thoughts.

我们会反复思虑或沉迷于某些情境，无论是那天晚上说的蠢话，还是即将到来的表演。

We, like, ruminate or we obsess over situations, whether it's the dumb thing we said the other night or the upcoming performance we need to do.

所以，如果我们有一个想法，比如‘我真是个失败者’，我们就会毫不质疑地相信这个想法，或者与自己的想法搏斗，试图强行让它们变得积极，试图阻止那些想法冒出来，比如‘我不能这样想’。

So if we have a thought like, Oh, I'm such a loser, then we just believe that thought without question, or we engage in, like, a wrestle with our thoughts, trying to, like, force them to be positive and trying to prevent pop in thoughts from happening, like, Oh, I can't think that way.

我不能有这种想法。

I can't think that thought.

或者我们害怕自己的想法。

Or we fear our thoughts.

我们对它们感到恐惧。

We're afraid of them.

我们评判它们。

We judge them.

我们要求它们改变。

We demand that they change.

但问题是，我们越试图强迫想法改变，它们就越响亮。

But the problem is that the more we try to force our thoughts to change, the louder they become.

更糟糕的是，当我们把大量精力投入到与想法的抗争中时，就会偏离生活中真正重要的东西。

And worse, when we're putting tons of energy into struggling with thoughts, we get sidetracked from what we really value in life.

所以在本视频中，你将学会如何通过ACT认知解离技巧，摆脱过度思考烦恼想法和消极思维的陷阱。

So in this video, you'll learn how to escape the trap of overthinking bothersome thoughts and negative thinking with the ACT skill of cognitive diffusion.

当我们对想法过于僵化——无论是盲目相信它们，还是极力抗拒它们——都会让这些想法变得更响亮。

When we're rigid with our thoughts, if we believe them or if we resist them, this can make them louder.

你的大脑运作方式是：你关注什么，就会获得更多什么。

The way your brain works is what you pay attention to, you get more of.

因此，你的大脑天生倾向于更关注你所留意的事物。

So your brain is wired to pay more attention to the things you pay attention to.

现在，来自Wasatch心理健康中心的迪恩·安德森曾给我讲过一个故事，来说明这个过程。

Now Dean Anderson, he's from Wasatch Mental Health, he once told me a story to illustrate this process.

当他的家人需要买一辆新车时，他们决定想要一辆苏必利尔，但其实并不确定想要什么颜色。在查看了各种选项后，他们决定购买一辆铅灰色的苏必利尔。

When his family needed a new car, they decided they wanted a Suburban, and they didn't really know what color they wanted, but after looking through their options, they decided that they wanted to buy a pewter Suburban.

那是一种类似黄褐色的灰银色。就在他们选定这个颜色后，虽然还没买车，你猜他们在路上开始看到什么？

It's kind of like a tawny gray silver color, And as soon as they chose that color, they hadn't bought the car yet, guess what they started seeing every time they were on the road?

无论是在高速公路上开车，还是去停车场时，他们都会看到。

They'd be driving on the freeway or driving to the parking lot.

他们看到了 pewter 色的 Suburbans。

They would see pewter Suburbans.

他们以前从未注意到这种颜色，尽管他们经常遇到这种车。

They had never noticed that color before even though they've been around them frequently.

这些车在路上已经开了一段时间，但他们之前从未留意过。

They've the cars had been on the road for a while, and they'd never seen them.

但一旦他们开始留意 pewter 色的 Suburbans，就发现到处都是这种车。

But once they started looking for pewter suburbans, they started seeing pewter suburbans everywhere.

这就是我们的大脑运作的方式。

This is how our brain works.

你关注什么，就会获得更多。

What you pay attention to, you get more of.

所以如果你有一个侵入性想法，心想：‘这太糟糕了。’

So if you have an intrusive thought and you're like, that was awful.

我再也不该有这种想法了，你的大脑就会想：‘哦，这个想法太重要了。’

I should never think that again, your brain is like, oh, that thought is super important.

让我们对这个想法给予大量关注，时刻留意这个想法。

Let's pay a ton of attention to that thought, and let's scan for that thought all the time.

如果它冒出来，就更要加倍关注它。

And if it pops in, let's pay even more attention to it.

这正是让这个想法变得越来越响亮的原因。

And this is what makes thoughts, that thought in particular, louder and louder.

你关注什么，就会得到更多。

What you pay attention to, you get more of.

或者如果你有这样一个想法：我会考砸这次考试，然后你拼命抗拒这个想法，心想：不，我是个优秀的学生。

Or if you have a thought like, I'm gonna fail that exam, and then you struggle against that thought and you think, no, I'm a great student.

我不能想失败的事。

I can't think about failing.

我必须保持积极思考。

I have to think positively.

于是你的大脑会让这两种想法都变得非常响亮，这种来回拉扯会干扰你学习的能力。

Then your brain makes both thoughts really loud, and that back and forth interferes with your ability to study.

那我们该怎么做呢？

So what do we do instead?

对于想法，什么方法才有效？

What does work with thoughts?

认知解离是一种ACT技巧，它让你不再相信你的想法，放下与它们的抗争，转而只是觉察它们。

Cognitive diffusion is the ACT skill where you stop believing your thoughts, you drop the struggle with them, and instead you notice them.

你把自己和你的想法分离开来。

You separate yourself from your thoughts.

你用你的价值观来明确你真正想关注的是什么。

You use your values to clarify what you do want to pay attention to.

因此，认知解离的第一项技能是觉察到自己正在思考。

So the first skill with cognitive diffusion is noticing that you're thinking.

我们在关于自动消极想法的视频中已经稍微讨论过这一点。

We talked about this a little bit in the video on automatic negative thoughts.

当你能从‘我不够好’这个想法，转变为‘我注意到自己正在想“我不够好”’时，这种转变会非常有力。

It can be really powerful when you're able to shift from the thought I'm not good enough to I'm noticing the thought that I'm not good enough.

对吧？

Right?

我们在上一个视频中提到过这一点，但让我们看看是否能更进一步。

We talked about that in the last video, but let's see if we can take this one step further.

接下来这个练习被称为观察者自我练习。

So this next exercise is called the observer self exercise.

所以现在让我们花一分钟时间来练习。

So let's take one minute right now and practice.

闭上眼睛，开始留意你的想法。

So close your eyes and start to notice your thoughts.

不要试图改变或评判它们。

Don't try to change them or judge them.

只是让它们来来去去。

Just let them come and go.

在接下来的一分钟里，觉察你脑海中出现的每一个想法。

For the next minute, become aware of every thought that crosses your mind.

当你注意到每一个想法时，默默地将它标记为‘思考’。

And as you notice each thought, silently label it as thinking.

例如，如果你想到‘我待会儿得洗衣服’，就对自己说：‘我正在想洗衣服的事’，或‘我正在想这个视频’，或‘我正在想我有多饿’。

So for example, if you think I have to do laundry later, acknowledge it by thinking to yourself, I'm thinking about laundry, or I'm thinking about this video, or I'm thinking about how hungry I am.

在标记了几个念头之后，试着转变视角。

After a few minutes of labeling your thoughts, try to shift perspective.

不要陷在你的想法里，而是想象自己坐在电影院里，看着屏幕上的念头。

So instead of being inside your thoughts, imagine you're sitting in a cinema watching your thoughts on a screen.

你的想法是电影，而你是观众。

Your thoughts are the movie and you are the audience.

记住，电影会来来去去，但观众始终在那儿。

Remember, movies come and go, but the audience remains.

现在，暂时从你的想法中抽离，注意你的身体感受。

Now shift for a second away from your thoughts and notice your bodily sensations.

你能感觉到身体对椅子或地面的压力吗？

Can you feel the weight of your body on the chair or the ground?

你能感觉到空气进入或离开鼻孔的感觉吗？

Can you feel the sensation of air entering or leaving your nostrils?

当你注意到每一种感觉时，提醒自己，是你在观察。

As you notice each sensation, remind yourself that you're the one who's observing.

你能观察到自己在思考吗？

Can you observe yourself thinking?

你能注意到，是你在产生想法，是你在感受这些感觉吗？

Can you notice that you're the one having thoughts, that you're the one having sensations?

这就是你的观察者自我在发挥作用。

This is your observer self in action.

好的。

Okay.

你能感受到思考的自我和观察者的自我之间的区别吗？

So could you feel the difference between the thinking self and the observer self?

保持在观察者状态容易吗，还是你又被拉回了思考中？

Was it easy to stay in the observer or did you get sucked back into thinking?

从旁观者的角度观察你的想法，而不是被它们缠住，这种感觉如何？

How did it feel to watch your thoughts from a distance rather than being entangled in them?

当我们被思绪的漩涡卷入时，很容易相信这些想法定义了我们，但通过接触观察者自我，我们会意识到：我们并非我们的想法。

When we're caught in the whirlwind of our thoughts, it's easy to believe that they define us, but by accessing the observer self, we realize that we are not our thoughts.

我们拥有想法。

We have thoughts.

我们是这些想法的观察者。

We are the observer of these thoughts.

这种视角可以在痛苦时刻减轻痛苦，并带来清晰的认知。

This perspective can reduce suffering and provide clarity in moments of distress.

记住，你的想法只是想法。

Remember, your thoughts are just thoughts.

它们不是事实，也不是你。

They're not facts, and they're not you.

通过定期练习从思考自我转向观察自我，你可以在生活中培养出更大的平静、平衡与理解。

By regularly practicing the shift from the thinking self to the observer self, you can cultivate a greater sense of peace and balance and understanding in your life.

现在，接纳与承诺疗法（ACT）对这种能力有很多隐喻。

Now ACT has a ton of metaphors for this skill.

棋盘就是一个例子。

The chessboard is one.

对吧？

Right?

你的想法就像棋子，而你是棋盘。

Your thoughts are like chess pieces, but you are the board.

你是这些想法发生的场所。

You're the place where these thoughts happen.

不要被某个单独的棋子牵绊住。

Don't get wrapped up in an individual piece.

只需观察整个棋盘。

Just notice the whole board.

另一个隐喻是，你的心智就像一位体育解说员。

Or another one is your mind is like a sports announcer.

它能持续评论数小时，但评论员并不是真正的赛事。

It can make commentary for hours and hours, but the announcer isn't the real event.

真正的赛事是他们正在进行的比赛。

The real event is the game they're playing.

是行动本身。

It's the action.

我们的大脑会对我们的许多行为进行评论，但当我们与想法保持一点距离时，我们就能成为参赛者。

So our brain is going to make commentary on much of what we do, but when we detach a little bit from our thoughts, we get to be the player.

例如，如果你有想法‘我会搞砸这次演讲’，不妨想象这是一个体育评论员在做评论，而不是被这些想法困扰或感到焦虑，你可以回应说：‘谢谢你的评论，大脑，提供这些评论。’

So for example, if you have the thought, I'm going to mess up this presentation, imagine it's a sports announcer providing commentary, and instead of getting wrapped up in the thoughts or feeling anxious, you might respond with, thanks for the commentary, mind.

我要回去继续准备，尽我所能。

I'm going go back to preparing and doing my best.

我就只是去参与比赛，你知道的。

I'm just going to play, you know.

还有一些其他简单的方法可以练习认知解离。

There's some other easy ways to practice diffusion.

所以在这段视频之后，完整课程中我们会有一些练习，比如‘河上的树叶’和‘公交车上的乘客’，帮助你更好地体会从陷入想法转变为观察想法的感觉。

So after this video in the full course, we'll have some exercises like leaves on a stream and passengers on the bus that can help you get a better idea of what it feels like to shift from being in your thoughts to being the observer of your thoughts.

另一种非常有效的方法是用幽默来疏离想法。

Another really powerful way to diffuse from thoughts is humor.

如果你对自己有负面想法，可以想象自己用滑稽的嗓音说出来，或者把它想象成卡通角色，或者用荒诞的方式唱出来，这样就能疏离这个想法。

So if you're having a negative thought about yourself, you could imagine yourself saying it in a silly voice or imagine it as a cartoon character or or just singing it, like, in a ridiculous way can diffuse the thought.

比如，我有了‘我是个失败者’这样的想法。

Like, I'm having the thought that I'm a loser.

然后用滑稽的调子唱出来。

And like just singing it silly.

这能帮助你看到想法其实没那么可怕，只是单纯的一个想法而已。

This can help you see your thoughts as like less threatening and just as a thought.

它不过是一堆文字而已。

It's just a bunch of words.

对我来说，进行认知疏离最简单的方法就是把想法写下来。

The easiest way for me to do cognitive diffusion is to write thoughts down.

把你的想法写下来，可以帮助你与它们保持距离。

Writing down your thoughts can be a helpful way to distance yourself from them.

所以你要确保以观察者的身份来做这件事，而不是把它当作现实。

So you wanna make sure you do this as an observer rather than as if like this is reality.

你可以给这张纸起个标题，比如‘我的思维机器在编造的东西’，或者写上‘我正在想……’，然后列出你正在经历的种种想法，比如：哦，这些都是我正在产生的想法。

So you could title the page stuff my word machine is making up, or you title the page like I'm having the thought that, and then you can just start making a list of thoughts like, oh, these are thoughts that I'm having.

另一种方法是将自己与这些想法分离开来，因为想法无处不在，就像我们浸泡在其中却浑然不觉。

Another way to kind of separate from this because thoughts are so just everywhere, it's like we're swimming in them and we don't realize it.

在婚姻咨询中，我们常常用‘故事’这个词来称呼这些想法，这非常有帮助。

So one of the things we often do in marriage therapy that can be really helpful is calling these thoughts stories.

我们在婚姻咨询中经常这么做。

We do this all the time in marriage therapy.

与其说‘我丈夫从不帮忙做家务’，不如说：‘我正在讲述一个我总是受害者的故事’故事。

So instead of saying, My husband never helps out around the house, you say like, oh, I'm telling the story that I'm always a victim here.

或者你可能会想：‘我妻子是个自恋者。'

Or you might think, my wife is a narcissist.

治疗师可以帮助你分辨，尽管她可能有一些自私的特质，但你正在讲述一个她无可救药地糟糕的故事，既然她这么糟糕，何必再努力呢？

And the therapist could help you discern that, like, while she may have some selfish traits, you're telling the story that she's incurably bad, and why bother trying if she's so terrible?

而这个故事并没有帮助你建立更好的关系。

And and then that story isn't helping you have a better relationship.

因此，我们大脑这个‘语言机器’总是在编造故事，如果我们过于固执地相信这些故事，就会过滤掉大量与之相悖的有益想法。

So our our word machine of a mind is always telling stories, and if we believe these stories too rigidly, we'll filter out lots of helpful thoughts that disagree with that story.

在YouTube的一个评论中，一个叫汤米的人用他自己的话解释了认知解离。

In a comment on YouTube, a guy named Tommy explained cognitive diffusion from his own words.

所以，他是这么说的。

So here's what he said.

他说：好吧，这是我对整个事情的看法。

He said, Okay, so this is my take on the whole thing.

想法和情绪会到来，有时似乎自发出现。

Thoughts and feelings come, sometimes seemingly on their own.

我不将它们判断为对或错。

I don't identify them as right or wrong.

我不花时间去反复思考、过度分析，试图拆解它们并弄清楚原因。

I don't spend time thinking and overthinking and trying to pick them apart and figure out why.

比如，天啊，我为什么会这样想？

Like, oh my, why in the world am I thinking like this?

因为那样会引发一连串关于想法的想法，无穷无尽。

Because that begins an endless string of thoughts about thoughts about thoughts.

它们就像打嗝或心跳一样自然发生。

They just happen like a hiccup or my heart beating.

所以我只是观察它们，判断是否有用，如果没有，那也挺有意思。

So I just kind of look at them, decide whether they're useful, and if not, that was interesting.

哦，好吧，继续下一件事。

Oh, well, on to the next thing.

好的。

Okay.

因此，认知解离的整个目标是帮助你与想法保持一点距离，从而将注意力和精力转向你真正关心的事情。

So the whole goal of diffusion is to help you get a little space from your thoughts so that you can shift your focus and energy into the things you care about.

当你不再那么专注于和纠结于你的想法时，你就能自由地活在当下，与你关心的人真正互动。

When you're not so focused and wrapped up in your thoughts, you're free to be here in the present and engaged with the people you care about.

你可以把精力投入到你热爱的事情中。

You can put your energy into doing the things you love.

所以对于那位芭蕾舞者客户，我会说，学会观察这些想法，然后选择扩散技巧。

So for that client who is a ballerina, I would say get good at watching those thoughts and then choose the skill of diffusion.

你把自己抽离出来，对自己说：我注意到我正在想这些角色定位和各种事情。

You separate yourself and be like, I'm noticing I'm having the thought about all these role positions and all this stuff.

然后我会问：那你希望转而想些什么呢？

And then I'd say, okay, what would you like to be thinking about instead?

我希望能放松一下，或者和朋友们在一起。

I'd like to be relaxing or I'd like to be with my friends.

好的。

Okay.

把注意力转移到那上面去。

Shift your attention to that.

但要做到这一点，我们需要与自己的想法保持距离。

But to do that, we have to have space from our thoughts.

我们通过这些认知解离技巧来练习这一点。

We practice that with these cognitive diffusion skills.

提醒一下，认知解离是一项需要练习的技能。

And just a reminder, cognitive diffusion is a skill that takes practice.

这并不是要消除你的想法，或永远不再被它们牵绊，而是学会以好奇和开放的态度观察它们。

It's not about getting rid of your thoughts or never getting caught up in them again, but it's learning to observe them with curiosity and openness.

我建议你，正念是另一种提升观察想法能力的有力方法。

And I would just encourage you mindfulness is another powerful way to get good at watching thoughts.

我们将在接下来的视频中讨论这项技能，我鼓励你持续练习并尝试不同的方法，找到最适合你的方式。

We're gonna talk about that skill in an upcoming video, and I'm encouraging you to just keep practicing and experimenting with different techniques to find out what works for you.

所以在下一个视频中，你将学到一些有效的方法来增强你转移注意力的能力。

So in in the next video, you'll learn some effective ways to strengthen your ability to shift your attention.

这一切的核心理念是，你不能推一根绳子。

The whole idea of this is we can't push the rope.

对吧？

Right?

我们无法强迫大脑停止过度思考，但我们可以拉绳子。

We can't force our brain to stop overthinking, but we can pull the rope.

我们可以通过学习温和地引导思维转变，来转移注意力，从而在生活上获得更多的掌控力——实际上是非常大的掌控力。

We can shift our attention, gain a little bit more influence over our lives, actually a ton of influence over our lives, by learning to gently invite our mind to change.

我们通过注意力的力量来实现这一点，但首先我们必须具备认知解离的能力。

We do that through the power of our attention, but first we have to have cognitive diffusion to do that.

所以，让我们学会觉察自己的想法，意识到我们正在产生想法，并且我们正是这些想法发生的场所。

So let's get good at noticing our thoughts, noticing that we're having thoughts, and that we're the place where those thoughts happen.

好的。

Okay.

感谢你的参与，我们很快再见。

Thanks for being here, and see you soon.

希望你喜欢这一集，并找到一些可以加入日常习惯中的方法，让生活变得更好一点。

I hope you enjoyed this episode and found something you can add to your daily routine that makes your life a little bit better.

如果你想了解更多关于如何处理艰难情绪、改变大脑、建立更好关系，或支持患有精神疾病的人的知识，请访问我的课程网站 therapyinanutshell.com。

If you want to learn more about topics like how to process tough emotions, how to change your brain, how to build better relationships, or support someone you know with a mental illness, then check out my classes at therapyinanutshell.com.

如果你觉得这些播客对你有帮助，请留下评分，让更多人能轻松找到这些内容。

And if you feel like these podcasts have been a benefit to you, please leave a rating so others can more easily find this content.

非常感谢，祝你今天愉快。

Thank you so much, and have a great day.