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来自WBEZ芝加哥，这里是《美国生活》。
From WBEZ Chicago, It's This American Life.
我是伊拉·格拉斯。
I'm Ira Glass.
雅各布斯和其他人不喜欢他们的老板曼赖特。
Jacobs and the other guys did not like their boss, Manwright.
曼赖特自大得很。
Manwright was full of himself.
他把他们做的工作据为己有。
He took credit for things that they did.
他很难相处。
He was hard to deal with.
于是他们决定搞垮他。
And they set out to sabotage him.
社会学家卡尔文·莫雷尔观察了他们是如何做到的。
Sociologist named Calvin Morell watched how they did it.
这是对不同公司中办公室政治的一项研究的一部分。
It's part of a study of office politics in different companies.
这些人都在一家他称为‘老金融’的老牌银行公司工作。
These guys all worked for an old line banking firm that he calls old financial.
这个故事中的所有名字都已更改。
All the names in this story have been changed.
莫雷尔说，在像这样的传统公司里，所有的政治操作都是秘密进行的。
In traditional companies like this one, Morell says, all the politics happen in secret.
全是暗中算计。
It's all subterfuge.
以下是雅各布斯如何摧毁曼赖特的过程。
Here's how Manwright was destroyed by Jacobs.
曼赖特过去总是依赖雅各布斯，在他参加高级执行委员会会议前为他做准备。
Manwright used to rely on this fellow Jacobs to prepare him before he would go before the senior executive committee meeting.
雅各布斯是个非常能干、非常聪明的人，他能预判出老板在这些会议上可能会被问到的问题。
And Jacobs was is very good, very smart guy, and he could anticipate some of the questions that his boss would be asked at these meetings.
因此，当他为上司做准备时，会故意不告诉上司一些他能预见到的问题。
And, so when he prepped him, he would just neglect to, tell his boss about some of the key questions that he could anticipate being asked.
结果，在委员会会议上，他的上司就毫无准备地站在那里，缺乏所需的信息。
And there, his boss would stand at the committee meeting naked without the information that he needed.
最终，他因为这个原因被撤职了。
And eventually, he was he was removed, as a result of this.
那么，曼赖特有没有意识到自己被 sabotage 了呢？
Now did Manwright understand that he had been sabotaged?
他没有意识到。
He didn't.
每次他回来的时候，都以为自己已经恢复了。
When when he actually, he got back each time.
这种情况在他身上持续发生，经历了好几次会议，他都被错误地准备了。
This happened to him over the course of several meetings where he was misprepped, if you will.
每次他回来，都坚定地认为自己的下属无能，因为除此之外，还能怎么解释这种情况呢？
And, each time he came back, he was firmly convinced that his subordinates were incompetent because how else could this have happened?
他从未想过，他们如此能干，甚至可能有意在进行破坏。
It never dawned on him that they were so competent and that they might actually be intentionally engaged in, sabotage.
莫雷尔研究的另一家数十亿美元规模的公司是他在玩具和教育产品领域称为Playco的公司。
Another multibillion dollar company that Morell studied is one that he calls Playco in the toy and education product business.
与所有金融行业不同，在金融行业里老板是老板、下属是下属，所有阴谋都必须秘密进行。
Unlike all financial, where bosses were bosses and underlings were underlings, and so all the scheming had to go on secret.
在Playco，根本没有真正的等级制度。
At Playco, there was no real hierarchy.
谁管谁，根本不清楚。
It wasn't clear who was in charge of whom.
虽然这听起来像是一个没有大老板、挺不错的工作环境，但事实是，由于没有人绝对负责做决策和约束员工，所有的争斗都摆在了明面上。
And while that might sound like a kind of nice place to work, with no big bosses, it turns out that with no one absolutely in charge to make decisions and keep people in line, all the fighting was right out in the open.
在会议上，人们会试图羞辱对方、在辩论中压倒对方。
At meetings, people would try to humiliate and out argue each other.
他们会结成联盟。
They'd form alliances.
Playco的高管们总是谈论荣誉和尊重，仿佛他们是中世纪的骑士或是黑帮分子。
The executives at Playco would talk all the time about honor and respect as if they were medieval knights or maybe mob figures.
我甚至在这家公司目睹过高管之间的暴力行为。
Then I even witnessed violence in this firm between executives.
我提到的一起事件是，两位高管在这家跨国公司的全球总部前大打出手。
One of the incidents I talk about was about two executives actually getting into a fistfight in front of the world headquarters of this this, multinational firm.
是的。
Yeah.
你就说说那两个人之间到底发生了什么。
Just just tell what happened between those two.
是的。
Yeah.
其中一个人，我叫他格里尔。
Well, one guy was called, I I call him Greer.
另一个人有个绰号叫‘终结者’。
And the other guy actually had a nickname called the the the Terminator.
他被称为‘终结者’，因为据这个人说，他喜欢猎捕大型猎物。
And he was called the Terminator because as this one guy said, he liked to hunt big game.
他喜欢寻找那些能在辩论和会议中被他击败的高管。
He liked to look for executives who he could best in arguments and meetings.
于是，这两个人在停车场停车时，彼此当面挑衅。
And so these guys were parking their cars in the parking lot, and they they called each other out, essentially.
格里尔指控终结者在本地健身俱乐部与女性胡搞，给公司丢脸。
Greer accused the Terminator of playing around with with women and and at at a local health club and embarrassing the corporation.
与此同时，终结者指控格里尔是个软弱的高管。
Meanwhile, the Terminator accused Greer of being a weak executive.
这件事不断升级，几分钟后，其中一人把另一人压在了他的莲花跑车上面。
This thing escalated, and, after a few minutes, one of them had the other over, his Lotus sports car.
在资本主义中，有一种观念认为公司是基于对市场和客户的理性评估来做决策、开发产品和制定战略的。
There's this idea in capitalism that companies are making decisions and products and strategy based on rational evaluation of the market and their customers.
根据你所看到的，这种说法在多大程度上是真实的？
To what degree to what degree is that true based on what you saw?
那么，有多少决策是基于办公室政治，而不是对公司在市场中位置的理性评估呢？
And to what degree are decisions being made based on office politics and not a rational evaluation of where their company is in the market?
其中有一些理性成分，但关于底线的思考，有时只是外界彼此传递的一个神话，决策并不总是围绕底线展开。
There is some rationality, but thinking about the bottom line is sometimes a myth that, outsiders tell each other about how decisions are made, and it's not always about the bottom line.
而是关于彼此之间的政治角力和相互博弈。
It's about politics with one another, maneuvering with one another.
考虑到卡尔文·莫雷尔在各种办公室里目睹的所有冲突，令人惊讶的不是办公室里有多少次拳打脚踢，而是这样的事竟然这么少。
Given all that, given all the conflict that Calvin Morell saw at all kinds of offices, what's surprising is not how many fist fights there are in offices, but how few.
我知道我亲身经历过一次。
I know I've been in one.
那是很多年前，一个刚起步的公共广播节目里发生的事，我并不觉得自己是个爱打架的人。
This happened, years ago on a public radio show that was just starting up, and I do not think of myself as much of a fun fighter.
但事情是这样发生的。
But here's how it went down.
那个为这个节目筹款的人有一个愿景。
The guy who raised the money to start this show had this vision.
他的构想是，如果有一个广播节目，你每天打开收音机，都能听到像斯派克·李、作曲家菲利普·格拉斯，还有物理学家斯蒂芬·霍金这样的人坐在一起，聊聊他们共同感兴趣的话题，那该多好。
And and what his vision was was he said, what what if there were a radio show where where you could turn on every day and you would hear something like Spike Lee and Philip Glass, the composer, and Stephen Hawkings, you know, the physicist, sitting down together and, you know, just talking, talking about the things that interest them in common.
所以这个节目每天长达两小时，明白吗？
So this show was two hours a day, okay?
这个家伙以前从未参与过日播节目。
This guy had never worked on a daily program.
他做过其他事情，但从没做过日播节目。
He'd done other stuff but never a daily program.
我和节目里其他一些人之前都做过日播节目。
I I and a number of the other people who worked on the show had worked on daily shows.
当时，我还没加入《箭头》节目。
At the time, by the I was not on the Arrow.
我只是个制片人。
Was just a producer.
所以我们正努力创办这个节目，每天一来就不停地工作、工作、工作、工作、工作。
And so we're trying to start this show and every day we would come in and we'd work and work and work and work and work.
每天，我们都会有这样的体验，我们会说：好吧，这就是我们认为我们可以做到的。
And every day, we would have this experience that we would say, okay, here's what we think we can do.
这是一个非常非常小的团队，人手极少。
It was a very very small staff, very small staff.
每天我们都会说：这是这一周我们认为可以做的，然后我们会规划出节目内容，这个、那个、还有这个、那个。
And every day we would say like, here's what we think we can, do, this week and we would lay out like the programs and this and this and this and this.
到最后，所有这些工作都投入进去了。
And and at the end of the whole thing, all this work had gone into it.
到最后，那个筹到所有资金并是我们的老板的人会说：嗯，这真的很不错。
At the end of the whole thing, the guy who had raised all the money and was our boss would say, you know, that's that's really very nice.
但你知道，这根本不是我们最初的想法。
But, you know, it's it's just not our original idea.
这并不是斯派克·李、菲利普·格拉斯和斯蒂芬·霍金坐在一起互相交谈。
It's not Spike Lee and Philip Glass and Stephen Hawkings, you know, sitting down and and talking to each other.
而那些有做日播节目经验的人一直对他说：嗯，这个想法其实非常好。
And those of us who had worked on daily programs had always said to him, you know, like, well, this is that that is a perfectly good idea.
这是一个非常合理的想法，很好的想法，但你得记住，你们每天要播出两个小时。
That's a very valid idea, perfectly good idea, but you have to remember that that you're on for two hours a day.
你知道，你们只有两个人在打电话、安排这些事。
You You know, you have, like, two people making phone calls and booking this.
你们有一两个剪辑师，还有一两个人。
You have, like, one or two tape cutters, one or two other people.
这是一个非常非常小的团队。
It's a very, very small staff.
所以，即使你能把斯派克·李、菲利普·格拉斯和斯蒂芬·霍金请到同一个房间里，弄清楚他们到底要交流什么——这还需要某人投入一定的研究和时间。
And so so even if, you know, you could get Spike Lee and Philip Glass and Stephen Hawkings into a room and you could figure out what in the world they actually have to say to each other, which would take a certain amount of research and time on someone's part.
即使你能实现这一切，那也只有一个小时的内容。
Even if you can make all this happen, you know, that's only one hour.
这只能撑一档节目，所以我们得想想其他那些小时该做什么。
That's only gonna be one show, and so we have to think about what's gonna happen in all these other hours.
所以这是一个非常好的想法，非常棒的想法，但这里还有其他许多想法，我们要用它们来填充剩下的所有时间。
And so so that's a very good idea, very very fine idea, but here are all these other ideas that we're gonna do to fill all this other time too.
这种情况日复一日、周复一周地持续着，人们工作得非常非常辛苦，渐渐精疲力尽。
And this went on for day after day and week after week, and people were working very, very hard and sort of burning out.
终于，在经历了数周这样的状态后，我们所有人聚在一起，刚完成了前五期节目，过程极其艰苦。
And finally, after weeks of this, we're all standing around, and we've just finished our first five shows, and it's been grueling.
真的非常非常艰难。
It's been really, really hard.
我们正在评估接下来该怎么做，以及如何调整节目的形式等等。
And we're evaluating what to do next and how we should change the format of the show and all that kind of thing.
经过这场漫长而漫长的讨论后，我们终于到了结尾。
And we get to the end of this long, long discussion.
看起来我们都达成了一致，仿佛我们同频共振。
It seems like we're all on the same page, and it lasts like we're all on a chord.
这就是我们一路走来的地方。
Here's where we've been.
这就是我们即将前往的方向。
Here's where we've going.
我们的老板说：‘有一件事我们还没谈到，那就是我觉得我们忘了节目的原始构想。’
And our boss says, well, you know, there's one thing that that we haven't gotten to, and that is I think we're forgetting the original idea of the show.
节目真正该有的样子是，想象一下，如果斯派克·李、菲利普·格拉斯和斯蒂芬·霍金能坐在一起，随便聊点什么。
That that really what it needs to be is think every hour needs to be more like well, just imagine if Spike Lee and Philip Glass and Stephen Hawkings could sit down together and, you know, just chat about whatever.
那几周真的非常艰难。
And it had been a really hard few weeks.
正如纳尔逊·曼德拉在完全不同的背景下所说，我们试过讲道理，但道理没能带来解决方案，所以暴力成了我们唯一的选择。
And as Nelson Mandela said in a very different context, you know, we had tried reason, but reason had failed to produce a solution, and so violence was our only option.
我当时真的看不到别的办法。
And I didn't really see anything else to do.
说‘我没看到别的选择’，其实暗示了一种并不存在的理性思考过程。
What to say I didn't see anything implies a kind of thinking that really wasn't exactly happening.
那完全是直觉驱动，我走过去，一拳打在他肚子上。
It was just straight, pretty much gut instinct, and I walked over, and I punched him in the stomach.
他的反应，我得说，并没有我期待的那么令人满意。
And his reaction, I have to say, was not really as satisfying as I was hoping for.
他整个人软绵绵的，像被 cushioned 一样。
It was like, he was sort of, he was sort of cushiony.
我觉得自己根本没给他留下什么印象。
I didn't feel like I was making much of an impression.
现在我们站得非常非常近，他靠得比我们以前任何时候都要近。
And, and we're standing very, very close now, and he closer, I think, than we had ever stood to each other.
他直视着我的眼睛，有点出汗，却一点都没生气。
And he looks me in the eyes, and he's a little bit sweaty, and he doesn't get mad at all.
这件事反而让他变得异常真诚。
The whole thing just makes him get really, really sincere.
他说：‘伊拉，我真的觉得你应该好好想想你在做什么。’——说实话，这让我更生气了。
And he says, you know, Ira, I really think that you should think about what you're doing for a second, which I have to say, you know, just made me madder.
当你真的对某人很生气时，他却开始像心理咨询师一样跟你说话，这只会让你更火大。
Like, you're really mad at somebody and they just start to talk to you like they're your therapist, you know, it just makes you madder.
于是我又揍了他一拳。
And so I punched him again.
而且，again，这种感觉并不太令人满足，有种软绵绵的感觉。
And, again, not terribly satisfying and sort of a cushiony kind of feeling.
而且你知道，现实中的拳头打出去声音并没有你想象的那么大。
And, you know, punches don't make as much of a sound in real life as you think they might.
他又一次靠近我，我们的脸离得很近，直视着我的眼睛，说：‘伊拉，我觉得你此刻正经历一些情绪，或许你可以用别的方式表达出来。’当然，这又让我揍了他一拳。
And again he sort of like looks me, our faces very close to each other, looks me in the eye and he says, you know Ira, think you're really having some feelings here that that maybe you might be expressing a different way, which of course made me punch him again.
到了第三拳的时候，几乎所有人都围了过来，我被这个节目的公共广播工作人员拉开了，其中还包括一位坐在轮椅上的男士——这让你能感受到当时这场打斗的激烈程度。
At this point at the third punch, pretty much people had gathered around us and I was pulled off by the public radio staff of this show which included a guy in a wheelchair which gives you a sense of the tough kind of fight that was going on here.
我之所以说这些，只是为了说明，即使在以冷静、温和、倡导坐下来理性沟通著称的机构里，即使在公共广播的办公室里，甚至就在我现在跟你说话的这个办公室里，情绪也可能激烈到让人动手。
And I say all this, now just to illustrate that even in the offices of an outfit known for its calm, voiced, let us all sit down together and reason together kind of reasonableness, you know, even in the offices of public radio, even here the office where I speak to you from right now, feelings are so extreme that they can lead to hitting.
我认为，我们在工作中的关系，包含了我们在所有私人关系中会有的所有情绪。
Our relationships at our jobs, I think, contain all of the feelings you know we have in all of our personal relationships.
有你喜欢的人，有你不喜欢的人，有感激，有怨恨，有嫉妒，所有这些情绪都存在。
Know there are people you like, people you don't like, there's gratitude, there's resentment, there's jealousy, it's all there.
所有这些情绪都在，但在职场中我们却不能表达出来，因为这是工作场所。
All the feelings are there except in the workplace we can't express it you know, because it's a workplace.
你必须把情绪压抑在心里，结果它却以各种其他方式渗漏出来。
You have to keep it bottled up inside and then it ends up seeping out in all these other ways.
今天，在我们的节目《办公室政治》中，我们将为您带来三个来自我国职场的冲突与高潮迭起的故事。
Well, today on our program Office Politics, we bring you three stories of conflict and high drama from our nation's workplaces.
第一幕，坚持住，小猫咪，快到周五了。
Act one, hang in there kitty cat, it's almost Friday.
在这一幕中，一位普通的办公室职员陷入了困境，她发现，在危急时刻，当一切努力都失败、希望全无时，她所在行业的公司会求助于一位女性——一位住在长岛郊区的女性，她能在电视持续播放的背景音中，解决公司的各种问题。
In that act, a lowly office worker gets in a jam and discovers that in times of trouble, when all else has failed, when all hope is gone, companies in her industry turn to one woman, one woman, my friend, in a suburban home in Long Island who solves their corporate problems without ever turning off the TV that plays in the background.
第二幕，她在会议室里天黑后喝威士忌。
Act two, she cakes in the conference room whiskey after dark.
大卫·拉托夫讨论了职场中生日及其他节日的庆祝方式。
David Ratkoff discusses the world of birthdays and other holidays as they are celebrated on the job.
第三幕：当让你摆脱街头生活的任务，竟发生在街头。
Act three: When the job to get you off the streets is on the streets.
在这一幕中，我们将听到一些错综复杂的办公室政治故事，而这些政治斗争发生在一个你可能根本想不到会有政治的地方——因为那里根本没有办公室。
In that act, we hear stories of the intricate office politics that take place in a location you might not suspect there is any politics because there is no office.
请继续关注。
Stay with us.
这是美国生活吗？
Is this American Life?
今天的节目是很久以前的重播。
Today's show is a rerun from long ago.
第一幕，坚持住，小猫咪。
Act one, hang in there, kitty cat.
快到周五了。
It's almost Friday.
斯塔莉·金在这一幕中讲述了一个办公室问题，它拒绝通过常规手段解决，因此不得不采取非常手段。
Starley kind tells the tale in this act of an office problem that refused to be solved by ordinary means, and so extraordinary means had to be employed.
凯莉在一家小型初创公司工作。
Kelly worked for a small start up.
员工只有大约十几个人，办公室就是一个没有隔墙的大房间，像教室一样。
There were only about a dozen people on the staff, and the office was just one big room with no walls, like in a classroom.
和其他办公室一样，许多办公室政治在这里上演，只不过这里没有门可以关上。
And a lot of the same office politics that happens behind closed doors in other offices happened in this one, except without the doors.
员工们很快就各自扮演起了固有的角色。
It didn't take long before the employees took on the established roles.
有酷小孩、撩人者、八卦达人、表面和善实则刻薄的老板，还有表面凶狠实则温柔的老板。
There was a cool kid, the flirt, the gossip, the nice boss who was really mean, the mean boss who was really nice.
甚至还有一个人扮演着非正式的心理咨询师角色。
There was even the person who functioned as the unofficial psychologist.
每个办公室都会有一个这样的人。
Every office has one.
就是那个大家倾诉心事的知己，愿意倾听你的烦恼，给你依靠的肩膀。
The person who's everyone's confidant, who listens to your problems and gives you a shoulder to cry on.
但在这个办公室里，政治斗争太过激烈，连她都不可信了。
In this office, though, the politics were so extreme that even she couldn't be trusted.
我们的人会和那个正在哭的人一起进来，那个哭的人会说：谢谢。
Our person would come in with the person who was crying, and person the who was crying would be like, thanks.
改天我请你喝啤酒。
I'll buy you a beer sometime.
我真需要把这事说出来。
I really needed to get that off my chest.
而那位心理顾问会说，哦，没关系。
And the the psychologist would be like, oh, it's okay.
你知道的，随时都可以。
You know, anytime.
我马上回来。
I'll be right back.
然后直接走过去找那个刚刚被说成在折磨她、让她生不如死、甚至可能想杀她的人。
And literally walk over to the person who the other person had just been saying is torturing them, making their life hell, and that they think might want to kill them.
然后过去说，你看到坐在那里的那个人了吗？
And then go over and be like, do you see that person sitting right there?
是的。
Yeah.
就是你正前方的那个吗？
The one right in front of you?
她觉得你可能想杀她。
She thinks that you might wanna kill her.
因为是初创公司，公司连维持运营都很困难。
Since it was a startup, the company was having trouble even staying in business.
压力很大。
Pressure was high.
工作时间很长。
Hours were long.
有很多压力、崩溃、眼泪、争吵，当然还有性关系。
There was lots of stress and breakdowns and tears and fighting and, of course, sex.
有一个人特别地和办公室里的一位女性有亲密关系。
There was one person in particular who was sleeping with one of the women in the office.
直到最后一天，我认为大多数员工都以为他是同性恋。
And until the last day, I think that most of the staff thought he was gay.
有一位女性是异性恋，但显然对我们办公室里唯一的女同性恋者有着热烈而强烈的爱慕之情。
There was a woman who was heterosexual, but obviously had a crush on the one lesbian we had in the office, like a hot and heavy crush.
而且她对男性也一样有好感。
And also on the men, too.
也就是说，她并不挑剔，对谁都来者不拒。
Like she wasn't, you know, doesn't discriminate.
我的意思是，一定程度的性关注其实挺好的。
And I mean, a certain amount of sexual attention is great.
你知道，它能让你早上起床，甚至愿意去洗头。
You know, it gets you get up, you know, to get up in the morning, to actually wash your hair.
但在这个办公室里，这种关注却从各种奇怪的方向扑面而来，办公室里还不断发生着各种配对关系。
But in this office, it was flying at you from such strange directions, and there was couplings happening within the office.
从凯莉的角度来看，最让人毛骨悚然的配对是她两位上司之间的关系。
From Kelly's perspective, the creepiest coupling was between her two bosses.
他们三个人正在一个新项目上紧密合作。
The three of them were working super closely on a new project.
两位上司本来就不太喜欢她，单独应付他们已经够难了。
The two bosses had both pretty much already hated her, and they've been hard enough to deal with them as individuals.
但当他们联手时，就变成了一个不可战胜的双头仇恨怪兽，而凯莉成了他们的首要目标。
But together, they formed this sort of invincible two headed monster of hate, and Kelly was her number one target.
当你和一个非常小的团队共事时，就像被困在一条船上，和这些人朝夕相处。
When you're working with a very small staff, it's like being stuck on a ship with people.
这成了你全部的生活。
That that's your only existence at all.
假设你被困在这艘船上。
So let's say you're stuck on this boat.
你身处大海，起初风平浪静，大家都兴高采烈。
You're out at sea, calm waters in the beginning, a lot of us celebrating.
我喜欢你。
I like you.
你喜欢我吗？
Do you like me?
我也喜欢你。
I like you too.
是的。
Yeah.
然后情况开始变得糟糕起来。
And then things start to get rougher.
事情开始变得艰难了。
Things start to get rougher.
人们变得易怒，因为他们在这艘船上被困了太久。
People are testy because they've been stuck in that boat for a long time.
你现在会知道一些你根本不想知道的关于别人的秘密。
You now know things like things that you don't even want to know about people.
在那种环境下，你不得不知道这些。
You're forced to know in those environments.
所以想象一下，再想象一下，我每天必须共事的那两个人，他们不跟我说话，不喜欢我，还睡在一起。
So imagine that, and then imagine the two people that I need to work with on a daily basis, not talking to me and not liking me and sleeping together.
所以想象一下，我们所有人都在这艘船上，还得为他们腾出空间来睡觉。
So imagine we're all in that boat and we have to make room for them to sleep with each other.
比如，好吧，往旁边挪一挪。
Like, okay, move over on the cods.
他们整个项目截止日期期间都不跟我对视，也不跟我讲话。
They just wouldn't make eye contact with me, wouldn't talk to me for the entire deadline that we were on.
而且这个人就坐在我六英尺远的地方。
And also this person is only sitting six feet away from me.
所以那种不舒服的感觉简直达到了顶点。
So like, the uncomfortability of that was through the roof.
然后，船慢慢开始下沉。
And then slowly, the ship began to sink.
他们没钱了。
They were running out of money.
老板们变得多疑，开始一个接一个地裁掉员工。
The bosses grew paranoid and started picking off their employees one by one.
有个人接电话时说错了话，当天就被解雇了。
A person answered the phone incorrectly and was fired that same day.
一种普遍的消沉情绪开始蔓延。
Malaise set in.
员工们开始迟到，甚至根本不来上班。
Employees started coming in later, not at all.
再也没有人相信这个项目了。
No one believed in the project anymore.
然后有一天，凯莉负责的几张不可替代的照片不见了。
And then one day, some irreplaceable photographs that Kelly was in charge of went missing.
我到处都找过了。
I looked everywhere.
我翻了书架，找了桌子底下。
I looked in the bookcases, under my desk.
我还去了我们楼层其他人办公室里找过。
I looked in, you know, other people's offices on our floor.
我看了那些公共的抽屉。
I looked in the drawers that were public.
你知道的，就是那种大家能放东西的公共抽屉。
You know, had public drawers that where people could store stuff.
我们还有一些私人的抽屉，平时别人在的时候我不会去翻，但我实在太绝望了，于是翻了每个人的東西。
And then we had drawers that were private, which I didn't go into when people were there, but I I did get so desperate that I went through everyone's stuff.
我当时都变得不理智了。
Like, I was getting irrational.
凯莉怀疑是她的某个上司偷了这些照片。
Kelly suspected that one of her bosses had stolen the photographs.
他们知道她必须把照片还给摄影师，而且她的声誉岌岌可危。
They knew that she had to return the photos to the photographer and that her reputation was on the line.
如果她不得不打电话给摄影师，告诉他照片丢了，那将是巨大的耻辱。
It would be a huge embarrassment if she had to actually call the photographer and tell him they were gone.
在她的办公室里，搞破坏变得流行起来。
In her office, sabotage was becoming trendy.
凯莉曾见过其他类似的例子。
Kelly had seen other examples of it.
但这种事情从未发生在她身上。
It just had never happened to her.
她觉得一切都完了，直到一位朋友告诉她，当类似物品找不到时，行业内其他公司会怎么做。
She thought all was lost until a friend told her what other companies in the industry did when objects like this couldn't be found.
如果出现这种情况，他们会聘请一名通灵者来帮助寻找这些照片。
If this situation arises, they will hire a psychic to help them locate the images.
一个女孩给了我一个号码，说这个人是纽约州认证的犯罪通灵者。
A girl gave me a number of someone who she said was certified by the state of New York, was a crime psychic.
我给她打了电话。
I called her.
她说，好的。
She said, okay.
我有
I've got
两天后，给你们半小时。
a half an hour for you two days from now.
来吧。
Come.
显然，一旦你接受了上司其实是在故意破坏你的想法，去找通灵者就不再那么疯狂了。
Apparently, once you've accepted the notion that your bosses are actually trying to sabotage you, the idea of going to a psychic just doesn't seem that crazy anymore.
这甚至很合适。
It's even appropriate.
凯莉在办公桌前当着所有人——包括那位涉嫌的上司——的面给通灵者打了电话。
Kelly called the psychic from her desk in plain sight of everyone, including the suspected boss.
她甚至都没打算压低声音。
She didn't even bother lowering her voice.
然后她开始按照通灵者的指示行事。
And then she set about following the psychic's instructions.
她拍下了办公室和所有工作人员的宝丽来照片。
She took Polaroid photos of the office and all the people working there.
然后她坐上了开往长岛 psychic 家的火车。
And then she got on a train to the psychic's house in Long Island.
她希望 psychic 能告诉她一些关于照片下落的信息，任何线索都行。
She was hoping that the psychic would be able to tell her something, anything about where the photos were.
但她得到的却多得多。
What she got was a whole lot more.
psychic 点了一支烟，而凯莉把拍好的宝丽来照片摆了出来。
The psychic lit a cigarette while Kelly laid out the Polaroid she'd taken.
接着，psychic 开始细致地描述她同事们性格中的微妙之处。
Then the psychic started describing the subtlest nuances of her coworkers' personalities.
有时候她只是说一些话，比如‘她太没有安全感了’，就好像她在和另一个人对话，而不是和我。
Sometimes she would just say, like, words like, oh, she she's so insecure, As if she was having, like, a whole another conversation that wasn't with me.
她还会说：‘她不够漂亮。’
And she'd be like, oh, she's not pretty.
哦，她会开始感到同情。
Oh, like and she would start to feel sorry.
然后她就会说，哦，好吧。
Then and then she'd be like, oh, okay.
他不喜欢女人。
He he doesn't like women.
他不是那种同性恋。
He's he's not like he's gay.
他就是从来不觉得女人有多重要。
He he just won't never thinks that women are worth that much.
在长岛所有占卜师的阅览室和家中，凯莉走进了这一个——安妮的家，这位办公室政治占卜师。
Of all the reading rooms and all the homes of all the psychics in Long Island, Kelly walked into this one, the home of Anne, the office politics psychic.
安妮让凯莉画一张她办公室的简易地图，标出每个人的位置。
Anne had Kelly draw a little map of her office with lines indicating where everyone sat.
这位占卜师从一张办公桌走到另一张，详细描述凯莉同事之间的办公室政治。
The psychic went from desk to desk to desk describing the office politics between Kelly's coworkers.
这两个人总是在互相八卦。
These two are always gossiping with each other.
别相信他们。
Don't trust them.
这个曾经是你的朋友，但他们不喜欢她，所以她被解雇了。
This one was your friend, but they didn't like her, so she got fired.
他很温柔。
He's sweet.
你可以告诉他一些事情。
You can tell him things.
然后她谈到了凯莉的两位上司。
Then she got to Kelly's two bosses.
然后她说，哦，好吧。
And then she said, oh, okay.
坐在这里的人整天都和坐在这里的人说话。
The person who sits here talks to the person who sits here all day long.
她实际上在那两位正在交往的上司之间画了一条线。
She actually drew a line between the two bosses who were sleeping with each other.
她画了条线。
She drew the line.
她一开始做得很好，会画一个小人儿，嗯。
She started well, she would draw a little stick person Mhmm.
比如，在桌子后面。
Like, behind the desk.
然后她会再画一个小人儿，说，哦，从这个区域到那个区域。
And then she would draw another little stick person, and she'd be like, oh, this area to this area.
她说，我的两个主要上司整天都在互相交谈。
Like, my two main bosses, she was saying, were constantly talking to each other all day.
她讲了一些我根本不知道发生过的事，后来我才发现那些事真的发生了。
She went into things that I didn't even know happened that later I found out happened.
比如，他们去
Like, they went on
旅行了。
a trip.
她基本上知道他住在她那里。
She knew basically that he was living at her place.
她没有什么不知道的。
There was not anything that she didn't know.
就像她整整六个月都坐在我旁边一样，掌握了同样多的信息，还加上了某种超自然的直觉。
Like, the same amount of information with added psychic phenomenon as if she'd been sitting next to me the whole six months.
我从未打过密斯·克莱奥的电话。
I've never called miss Cleo.
我从未做过塔罗牌占卜，也从未让人读过茶叶渣。
I've never had a tarot reading or had my tea leaves read.
我从未去过灵界。
I've never crossed over.
但当我听说长岛有个通灵者能说出谁在撒谎说弄坏了办公室的传真机时，我就必须去一趟。
But when I heard there was a psychic in Long Island who could tell who was lying about breaking the office fax machine, had to go.
我打了电话并预约了时间。
I called and made an appointment.
她同意我来，但有一个条件。
She had one stipulation for letting me come.
不准拆台。
No debunking.
我想我教你开车，你教我怎么做地道的意大利菜。
I guess I teach you how to drive and you teach me how to be a great Italian cook.
今天人人都像喜剧演员。
Everybody's a comedian today.
安妮和她年迈的母亲以及七岁的女儿住在一起。
Anne lives with her elderly mother and her seven year old daughter.
我到那里时，祖母和孙女正舒服地坐在椅子上看着《黄金女郎》。
When I get there, grandmother and granddaughter are nestled in easy chairs watching Golden Girls.
安妮在后面做占卜，她母亲转过身来问我是不是也是来做占卜的。
Anne's doing a reading in the back, and her mother turns to me and asks if I'm there for a reading too.
我告诉她我不是。
I tell her I'm not.
我们沉默地一起看了几分钟电视，然后安的母亲又转向我，问我是不是来参加朗读会的。
We watch TV together in silence for a few minutes, and then Anne's mother turns back to me and asks if I'm there for a reading.
这种模式一直持续到节目结束。
This pattern continues for the rest of the show.
我最终妥协了，说：是的。
I finally give in and say, yes.
我是来参加朗读会的。
I'm there for a reading.
然后她站起来，慢悠悠地走向厨房，我听见她低声嘀咕：一群吉普赛人。
Then she gets up and shuffles off to the kitchen, and I can hear her muttering under her breath, fucking gypsies.
接着安走进来，带我去了她的朗读室。
Then Anne comes in and takes me to her reading room.
在我们保留这块红色地毯之前，它关系到你的根轮，能给我很多能量，因为我实际上处于贝塔睡眠状态。
Before we kept the red carpeting, it's your root chakra, and it gives me a lot of energy because I'm actually in a beta level sleep state.
所以我总是昏昏沉沉的，而早上唤醒我的最好方式就是这块柔软的红色地毯。
So I'm kind of groggy and the best thing to wake you up in the morning is that nice red carpeting.
安的读心室看起来像一间郊区的客房。
Ann's reading room looks like a suburban guest bedroom.
有一张日间床，她喜欢它，因为这让她感觉更像治疗师的办公室；墙上挂着她家人的照片，电视上堆满了各种小摆设，比如一个标着‘问题客户骨灰’的罐子。
There's a day bed that she likes because it makes it feel more like a therapist's office, pictures of her family, and a TV cluttered with tchotchkas like a jar labeled ashes of problem customers.
安更喜欢被称为‘清晰通灵媒介’，这意味着她能听到不存在的东西，而不是看到不存在的东西。
Ann prefers to be called a clear audience transmedium, which means that she can hear stuff that isn't there as opposed to seeing stuff that isn't there.
她进入催眠状态后，她的三位灵体向导会向她传递信息。
She goes into a trance and then her three spirit guides feed her the information.
当我打电话给安时，她告诉我，我到的时候她会处于催眠状态。
When I talked to Anne on the phone, she told me she'd be in a trance when I got there.
事实上，她告诉我的时候就已经在催眠状态中了。
In fact, she'd been in a trance when she told me that.
原来安几乎总是处于催眠状态。
It turns out Anne's almost always in a trance.
在我她家时，我看到她在催眠状态下收了服务费、推荐了一家好餐厅，并把客户送到门口。
At her house, I saw her receive payment for her services, recommend a good restaurant, and usher her client to the door, all while in a trance.
这似乎是对‘trans’这个词的完全滥用。
This seemed to be a complete abuse of the word trans.
并不是要故意拆台什么的。
Not to be debunky or anything.
预约安的时段很难抢到。
Appointments with Anne are hard to get.
她谁都会接，但通常提前几个月就排满了。
She'll take anybody, but she's usually booked months in advance.
人们来找她通常是为了一些常见事项，比如通灵已故亲人，但她主要靠寻找丢失物品赚钱，而且很大一部分客户是来解决工作问题的。
People come for the usual stuff like channeling dead relatives, but she does a big business of finding lost objects, and a large percentage of her clients come about problems at work.
如果你仔细想想，在大多数情况下，你白天醒着的时间大部分都是在办公室度过的。
If you think about it, that's where you spend most of your waking time during the day in most cases is in offices.
所以人们会遇到各种各样的问题，多到我根本数不清也衡量不了。
That's why there's so many issues that people, a variety of issues, I couldn't begin to count or measure.
我的意思是，你能想到的，我都遇到过。
I mean, you name it, I've had them all.
我整天看着安妮的客户来来往往。
I watch Anne's clients drift in and out of her home from morning till night.
我学到的是，不管人们从事什么类型的工作，都没关系。
And what I learn is this, it doesn't matter that the people work in different kinds of jobs.
他们的故事都是一样的。
All their stories are the same.
有个警察，上司是个混蛋，一心要让他生不如死。
There's a cop with a crap boss intent on making his life hell.
你知道吗，你可能坐在一个房间里，有五个人。
You know, you could be sitting in a room with five people.
他走进来，跟其他四个人打招呼，却完全无视我，好像我根本不存在。
He would walk in and say hello to the other four and just like ignore me like I wasn't there.
有个租车公司的女人，她的上司不喜欢女性。
There's a woman from the car rental agency with a boss who didn't like women.
他之前已经解雇了办公室里另外两个女孩。
And he had already been responsible for firing the two other girls in the office.
我是唯一剩下的女性。
I was the last remaining female.
有一位来自电话公司的女性，她与许多比她年轻的人一起工作。
There's a woman from the phone company who's working with a lot of people younger than her.
有几个经理让她感到困扰。
There was a few managers that had a problem with.
她那种人会当面笑你，但其实背后却在算计你。
She was the type that will laugh in your face, but she actually like, did you in behind your back?
跟安聊起这些，每个办公室都像《奥赛罗》一样，充满嫉妒、贪婪和阴谋。
Talking to Ann about all this, every office is Othello, full of jealousy and greed and intrigue.
凯莉的故事对她来说一点也不意外。
Kelly's story wasn't surprising to her at all.
让我惊讶？
Surprised me?
说实话，这没什么让我惊讶的，因为我觉得职场中这种情况非常普遍，很多时候都充满了背后捅刀子的行为。
Not much of it, honestly, because I find it very common in the workplace, and very often times than not there's a lot of backstabbing.
在某个时候，我猜你曾担心过在同事、上司或工作上投入了过多的情感精力。
At some point, I'm guessing, you've worried about investing too much emotional energy in your colleagues, your boss, your work.
至少我们都在这么做。
At least we're all doing it.
事实上，对凯莉来说，去找安妮谈论那些失踪的照片，其中最好的一点就是安妮并没有觉得她的反应过度。
In fact, for Kelly, one of the best things about going to Anne about the missing photos is that Anne didn't view her freak out as excessive.
直到那时，我会打电话给我妈妈，说他们把照片拿走了。
Up until that point, you know, I would be, like, calling my mom saying, like, they've taken them.
他们把照片拿走了。
They've taken them.
我知道他们拿走了。
I know they have.
她会和我一样彻底崩溃，就像我所有的朋友都会那样。
And she would be totally freaked out as any like, all of my friends were.
他们都说，别再纠结了。
And they're like, let it go.
你会找到它们的。
You're gonna find them.
我会说，不会。
And I'd be like, no.
不会。
No.
这太糟了。
This is bad.
这真是个糟糕的地方。
This is a horrible place.
你知道，我会大发牢骚，而我的朋友和家人都试图装作没事。
You know, and I'd be going on these rants, and all my friends and my family were trying to be okay about it.
但她却是第一个说，哦，是的。
But she was the first person that was like, oh, yeah.
这确实很糟，你说得对，这真不幸。
This is bad, and you're right, and that's unfortunate.
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我说，你知道的，我带了照片，想给她看看办公室里不同的地方。
And I said, well, you know, brought photos, you know, so I wanted to show her the photos to show her the different places in the office.
她基本上只看了一眼第一张照片，那是一张办公室所有男同事的宝丽来照片，然后说：就是他。
And she basically looked at the first one, which is a Polaroid of all the guys in the office and said, that's him.
你拍那张照片的时候，他非常生气，因为他知道你要来这儿。
He was really mad when you were taking that photo because he knew that you were coming here.
她指的那个人是凯利的老板。
The man she pointed to was Kelly's boss.
在这张照片里，他脸涨得通红，瞪着我。
He he's red in the face in this photo, glaring at me.
他脖子上的血管都暴出来了，看起来好像随时会打我。
His veins on his neck are sticking out, and it looks like he could probably hit me.
这到底有多少是真正的预知能力，谁也说不准。
How much actual clairvoyance was involved in this is anyone's guess.
安的客户们都对她深信不疑。
Anne's clients all swear by her.
其实我很喜欢她。
Love her, actually.
但安和她的客户们都认为，安所做的部分工作是确认你本已知道的事情。
But Anne and her clients all say that a part of what Anne does is confirm what you already know.
凯莉早就怀疑她的老板，并告诉安她猜对了。
Kelly suspected her bosses and told her she was right too.
掌握了这个新信息后，凯莉什么也没做。
Armed with this new knowledge, Kelly did absolutely nothing.
她没有直接质问她的老板，也没有越级向公司高层反映。
She didn't confront her bosses or go over their heads to the head of the company.
她什么都没做。
She didn't do anything.
她没必要做。
She didn't need to.
她感觉好多了。
She felt better.
我感觉完全被证实了。
I felt totally vindicated.
我感觉像是解脱了。
I felt, like, released.
在安妮之后？
After Anne?
是的。
Yeah.
我确实感到解脱了，因为在我去找她之前，我一直等着他们崩溃。
I totally felt released because before I went to her, I kept waiting for them to break.
我总想着也许他们会告诉我，或者承认这件事，或者干脆在晚上把证据放在我桌上，我早上一来就能看到。
I kept thinking that maybe they'd tell me or that they'd admit to it or that they just, like, put them on my desk in at night, and I'd come in in the morning and they'd be there.
我经常幻想这种情况。
I've had fantasies about that a lot.
之后，我就再也不用担心了。
And then afterward, I just I didn't have to worry anymore.
我根本没有怀疑过。
I had no suspicions.
我知道她告诉我的每一件事都是真的，于是我就不在乎了。
I knew that everything that I had thought she had told me was true, and I stopped caring.
我觉得我能以不同的角度去看他们了，那不再关乎个人了。
I felt like I could look at them from a different angle, and it wasn't personal anymore.
只是让人觉得，哇。
It was just more like, wow.
这真够可怜的。
That's pretty pathetic.
你知道吗？
You know?
那些丢失的照片从未被找到，正如安所说，它们不会被找到。
The lost photos were never found, just like Anne said they wouldn't be.
凯莉现在在别的地方工作。
Kelly now works somewhere else.
安妮明年夏天已经预订好了。
Anne is booked for next summer.
办公室政治的问题在于，它在办公室之外从来都说不通。
The problem with office politics is it never really makes sense outside the office.
你的朋友和家人永远无法真正理解，你为什么那么讨厌走廊那头的女孩。
Your friends and family will never fully understand what it is you hate so much about the girl down the hall.
对于安妮来说，她不仅似乎能理解，你甚至都不用告诉她这些事。
With Anne, not only does she seem to understand, you don't even have to tell her about it.
斯塔莉·海恩，她在制作这个故事时是我们节目的制片人。
Starly Hine, she was a producer on our show when she made that story.
自从我们首次播出本期节目以来的这些年里，她创建了另一档广受欢迎的播客，名叫《神秘秀》。
In the years since we first broadcast today's show, she went on to create this beloved and podcast called mystery show.
如果你喜欢这个故事，不妨去你常听播客的地方搜索一下《神秘秀》。
If you like this story, you might wanna check that out wherever you get your podcasts.
第二幕，她在夜深人静时踢开会议室里的威士忌。
Act two, she kicks in the conference room whiskey after dark.
众所周知，美国人正在工作中投入更多时间，这意味着更多人的社交生活围绕着工作展开，更多的节日在工作场所被更热烈地庆祝，意义也更重大。
Americans are, as everybody knows, spending more time on the job, which means more people's social lives are organized around their work lives, and more holidays are celebrated more intensely and mean more on the job site.
大卫·拉托夫在我们《美国生活》节目组全国巡演、面向现场观众演出期间，撰写了接下来这个故事。
David Ratkoff wrote this next story while we at This American Life took our show on the road, doing our show before live audiences around the country.
这是一个关于工作中庆祝的三个节日的寓言。
It is a parable of three such holidays as celebrated on the job.
第一个节日：全国秘书日。
Holiday the first, National Secretary's Day.
至少我们自我安慰说，我们是助理，而不是秘书。
At least we consoled ourselves we were assistants, not secretaries.
在我们所处的世界——纽约出版业——这些头衔意味着一切。
In the world we were in, the world of New York publishing, these titles meant everything.
这是一种令人厌恶的区分，就像田间奴隶和家内奴隶之间那几乎毫无意义的差别。
It's a loathsome distinction, the almost meaningless difference between field and house slave.
毕竟，无论是秘书还是助理，我们的职责都大同小异：归档、复印、口述记录，以及预订那些我们根本吃不到的餐食。
After all, we all of us, secretaries and assistants alike, had much the same duties, filing, photocopying, taking dictation, and making reservations for meals we would never get to eat.
我们和秘书之间有一个明显的差距，那就是她们的薪水远高于我们。
There was one glaring discrepancy between us and the secretaries, specifically their salaries dwarfed ours.
但我们的贫困伴随着一个承诺：我们终将有更好的前途。
But our penury came with the promise that we were bound for better things.
我们会得到指导、获得晋升，终有一天升任为图书编辑，重新恢复我们对东海岸精英制度的信仰。
We would be mentored, promoted, and one day raised to our rightful stations as book editors, our faith in the East Coast meritocracy restored.
然而，每年四月，当国家秘书日到来时，我们许多人会请病假， genuinely nauseous with worry，生怕自己被误认为是秘书，而我们的办公桌上会摆着天门冬和满天星，周围是长长的玫瑰，附着老板亲笔写的真挚便条：‘没有你我真不知道该怎么办。’
Still, every April, when National Secretary's Day rolled around, many of us took sick days genuinely nauseous with worry that we might be mistook for them, and there on our assistants' desks would be the asparagus fern and baby's breath surrounded long stem roses with the heartfelt note from the boss who just couldn't do it without you.
除了国家秘书日，我们助理们也有自己的民间传统和专属节日，其中一个我们几乎每晚都会庆祝。
Instead of National Secretary's Day, we assistants had our own folk traditions with our own holidays, one of which we celebrated often, almost nightly, in fact.
我们称之为喝酒。
We called it drinking.
令人不安的是，每天下班后，我们都会出现在老猴子酒吧、多塞特酒吧、沃里克酒吧，这些酒吧都附属于一些条件尚可但略显破旧的酒店。
With disturbing regularity, the end of the workday found us at the old Monkey Bar, the Dorset Bar, the Warwick Bar, all of which were attached to serviceable and somewhat down at heel hotels.
曼哈顿中城过去到处都是这种舒适而陈旧的场所，那里有经验丰富的侍者，梳着光亮的背头，穿着闪亮的肘部夹克，提供价格低廉但淡而无味的饮品，还有免费小吃：干瘪的芹菜棒、毫无讽刺意味的仿亚洲小食拼盘、配着奶酪酱的椒盐脆球，那奶酪酱的颜色在自然界中通常预示着某种危险。
Midtown Manhattan used to be full of just such comfortably shabby establishments where career waiters with brilliant teamed comb overs and shiny elbow jackets served marvelously cheap, albeit watery drinks along with free snacks, withered celery sticks, unironic faux Asian poo poo platters, pretzel nuggets accompanying a cheese spread of a color that in nature usually signals.
我是一只迷人却剧毒的树蛙。
I am an alluring yet highly poisonous tree frog.
小心。
Beware.
晚餐加遗忘，仅需10美元。
Dinner and forgetfulness all for $10.
青春从不浪费在年轻人身上。
Youth is not wasted on the young.
而是强加在年轻人身上。
It is perpetrated on the young.
酒水，幸运的是，是我们能负担得起的奢侈？
Hooch, happily, was one luxury we could afford?
我们的醉意是双重的。
Our drunkenness was twofold.
首先，是酒精；但还有一种醉意，源于我们那种自吹自擂的信念：我们这些幸运的少数人、这些快乐的酒鬼，正是那个最传奇的酒友团体——阿尔冈昆圆桌会议——的现代化身。
First, there was the liquor, but there was also the intoxication brought on by the self aggrandizing conviction that we happy few, we cheery booze hounds were the new incarnations of that most mythic bunch of sauces, the Algonquin round table.
这个白日梦不仅支撑着我们，我怀疑城里无数其他出版业小职员的餐桌也靠着它维系。
This pipe dream sustained not just us, but I suspect countless other tables of publishing menials all over town.
我们如此渴望接过帕克、本奇利及其同僚的衣钵，以至于我们不会让任何愚蠢的障碍——比如缺乏机智，或我们任何人根本没有任何作品——阻碍我们。
So desperate were we to assume the mantles of Parker, Benchley, and their that we weren't going to let some silly thing like a dearth of wit or the complete absence of a body of work on any of our parts deter us.
只要足够多的四美元饮品在我们血管里翻腾，就连最愚钝的校园玩笑也能被当作熠熠生辉的妙语。
With enough $4 drinks sloshing through our veins, even the most dunderheaded schoolyard japery qualified as coruscating repartee.
你想要什么？
What do you want?
一条转发可能会这样开头。
A repost might begin.
一枚奖章，或者一个可以别奖章的胸膛？
A medal or a chest to pin it on?
哦，说得好，我们一边紧握着马提尼，一边欢快地喊道。
Oh, touche, we cried merrily as we clutched our martinis.
这代表了对话的巅峰。
That represented the high point of the discourse.
渐渐地，我们的舌头变得迟钝，情绪也变得不愉快地阴沉。
Gradually, our tongues thickened and our moods darkened unpleasantly.
随着夜晚的推移，一股充满金酒气味的敌意笼罩了一切，我们那些闪耀的格言退化为简单而直白的愿望：但愿我的老板此刻已经死了。
As the evenings wore on, a hostile gin scented pole fell over everything, and our glittering aphorisms were reduced to the wishful and direct, I hope my boss is dead right now.
结账后，我们摇摇晃晃地走出街道，回到各自的公寓，在那里，我们整晚嫉妒地阅读那些真正写作而非只靠喝酒吹牛的人的手稿。
Paying the bill, we stumbled out into the street and back to our apartments, where we spent the rest of the night jealously reading the manuscripts of those who actually wrote and didn't just drink about it.
第二天早上，我们疲惫地回到办公室，手拿酒精和棉球，开始逐叶擦拭老板办公室里的盆栽植物，试图阻止在整层楼蔓延的粉虱疫情，但这完全是徒劳的。
Rising unrefreshed, we would return to the office and, rubbing alcohol and cotton balls in hand, get down to work swabbing leaf by leaf the potted plants in our boss' office, a vain attempt to stop the outbreak of whitefly that was going around the floor.
给上级留下好印象成了我们永恒的目标。
Impressing the higher ups became our constant purpose.
我们在毫无意义地夸大自己的信息传递能力、整理技巧上耗费了过多时间，而这一切都笼罩在对工作的深深厌恶之下。
We spent an inordinate amount of time attaching disproportionate significance to our message taking skills, our collating acumen, no small feat from under a hovering cloud of job hatred.
多年后回望，才悲哀地意识到，那个一直萦绕在我们心头的问题——他们怎么看我？——的答案是：
How sad to realize from the vantage point of years later that the answer to the question that was perpetually on our minds, what do they think of me?
他们根本就没在意过。
Was they didn't at all.
现实点说，我们只是帮手，最好别忘了这一点。
Realistically, we were the help, and it was best not to forget it.
第二个假期，圣诞节。
Holiday the second, Christmas.
曼哈顿中城那大约三周的圣诞节时光，是助理们的梦想。
Those three weeks or so of Midtown Manhattan Christmas are an assistant's dream.
没人干活，一切都笼罩在浪漫的忧郁中。
No work gets done and all is romanticized melancholy.
这正是我们许多人搬到这座城市的原因——为了也能带着厌世的目光，凝视大堂里那棵 corporate 圣诞树，周围堆满包装精美的空盒子，谁都不会被蒙骗，而在那机构式荧光灯下弥漫的悲伤中，感受到一丝近乎深刻的东西。
It was precisely why so many of us had moved to the city, so that we too might gaze misanthropically at the corporate Christmas tree in the lobby surrounded with gift wrapped empty boxes that fool nobody, and in the institutional fluorescent lit sadness of it all feels something approaching depth.
电话闲着。
The phone's idle.
我们整天中午去看电影，几小时后才回到办公室，在走廊里游荡，像一群饥肠辘辘的田鼠一样翻找礼品篮，靠卡氏水饼干、 individually 红蜡封口的婴儿高达奶酪南瓜太妃糖、爆米花、烟熏杏仁，以及直接从罐子里挖着吃的高级果酱维生。
We spent our days going to the movies during lunch, returning hours later to troll the halls of the office, foraging through the gift baskets like a ravening pack of voles, subsisting on Carr's water biscuits, individually red wax dip balls of baby Gouda butternut toffee, popcorn, smokehouse almonds, and fancy fruit preserves eaten directly from the jar.
这种饮食让我们脸上布满黑头，油光闪闪，宛如使徒们闪耀的面容。
A diet that had our faces peppered with blackheads and glistening with oily sebum as unto the shining visages of the apostles.
我们的老板们都和家人去了乡下的房子，过着真正的生活。
Our bosses were away with their families at country houses having real lives.
我们不禁好奇，当他们回来时，看到空空如也的礼品篮会作何反应。
We wondered how they might greet the sight of the empty food baskets upon their return.
如此混乱，如此越界。
Such anarchy, such transgression.
和往常一样，他们根本没注意到。
As usual, they never even noticed.
而我们，却根本无法想象一个不知道自己那堆大腰果具体数量和位置的世界。
We, on the other hand, could not even conceive of a world wherein we did not know the exact quantity and location of our giant cashews.
假期的第三天。
Holiday the third.
生日快乐。
Happy birthday.
在经历了极度被奴役的协助时刻之后，比如某天早上你天真地打开一份未经请求的手稿，却发现有人寄给出版社一个装满人类粪便的吉福包，或者你被派去角落为一位刚获得百万美元书稿预付款的作者买一杯卡布奇诺——而那杯咖啡的费用我从未得到报销。
After any moment of extreme assistance subjugation, say, a morning wherein one might innocently open an unsolicited manuscript only to find that someone had mailed the publishing house a jiffy pack full of human feces, or one might be sent to the corner to pick up a cappuccino for an author who had just been given a million dollar book advance, a coffee for which I was not reimbursed.
在这样的时刻之后，我们会走向希拉的隔间，那里总能获得清醒的建议和香烟。
After such moments, we would make our way to Sheila's cubicle, where we could always be guaranteed clear eyed advice and cigarettes.
希拉是我们这群坏女孩的领袖。
Sheila was our bad girl leader.
她自己也是一位诗人和作家，厌恶自己的工作，毫不掩饰地表现出来，公然在办公桌旁抽烟，对任何形式主义都嗤之以鼻。
A poet and writer herself, she despised her job and didn't care who knew it, smoking openly at her desk and standing on ceremony for no one.
这些就是我昨晚睡觉时穿的睡衣，她会指着身上那件黑色长袖T恤和黑色运动裤说。
These would be my pajamas that I slept in last night, she would say indicating the black long sleeve t shirt and black workout pants she was wearing.
还有这个，”她会一边用手指摩挲着上衣下摆上一块干涸的白色污渍一边补充道。
And this, she would add fingering a crusted white smear on the hem of the top.
这是洒出来的食物。
This would be spilled food.
真棒。
Nice.
嗯，人们常说，要穿得像你想要的那份工作，而不是你当前的那份工作。
Well, they say, dress for the job you want, not the job you have.
所以，当我收到生日卡片时，我立刻去找了希拉。
So, of course, it was immediately to Sheila that I went when I received my birthday card.
那是十一月下旬。
It was late November.
打开信封，我的目光落在一张五十年代那种着色B级片剧照上。
Opening the envelope, my eyes fell upon it, a reproduction of one of those tinted b movie stills from the nineteen fifties.
画中一位女性穿着得体的羊毛西装外套，戴着一副男人从不为之倾心的眼镜，还戴着一个接线员耳机，耳机里正射出细小的闪电，她心里想着：有人需要咖啡。
A woman in a smart worsted business jacket wearing a pair of glasses at which men seldom make passes, and a switchboard operator's headset out of which were shooting tiny lightning bolts were shown to be thinking, someone needs coffee.
在她头顶，用刺眼的科幻酸黄色字体写着这张卡片所声称的电影名称：《超能秘书的奇妙故事》。
Above her head in screaming sci fi acid yellow type was the title of this cards purported movie, The Amazing Tale of the Psychic Secretary.
我把卡片重新塞回信封，走过去拿给她看。
I slid the card back into the envelope, walked over, and showed it to her.
穿上外套，”她说，语气一本正经，表情难以捉摸。
Get your coat, she said, her voice businesslike, her face unreadable.
我们去了沃里克酒吧。
We went to the Warwick bar.
别说话了。
Don't talk for a while.
就抽烟吧，”她说。
Just smoke, she said.
然后她像是突然想起什么似的，补充道：‘但你早就知道我会这么说，对吧，心灵秘书？’
And then as an afterthought, added, but you knew I was going to say that, didn't you, psychic secretary?
在我们对面的昏暗卡座里，坐着一对男女。
Across from us in the darkened booth, a couple sat, a man and a woman.
他们显然已经坐了好几个小时，女人的头在脖子上晃来晃去，时而用挑逗的语气低语，时而又对伴侣的笑话笑得过于响亮。
They'd clearly been there for hours because the woman's head was lolling about on her neck as she alternately whispered lubriciously or laughed too heartily at her companion's jokes.
我们清楚地看到桌下她正不断向上摩挲着他的大腿。
We had a clear view under the table where we could see her rubbing ever higher up his thigh.
我知道这场对话会走向何方。
I knew where this exchange was leading.
心灵术士。
Psychic.
就在那个晚上不久之后，我坐在一座座无虚席的电影院里。
Not long after that evening, I sat in a movie theater packed to the rafters.
灯光熄灭前，一位女士沿着过道走来，看着我问：这个座位有人坐吗？
Just before the lights went down, a woman marched up the aisle, looked at me, and asked, Is that seat taken?
我离座位尽头还远着呢，但为了帮忙，我问：哪个座位？
I was nowhere near the end of the row, but trying to be helpful, I asked, Which seat?
她直视着我的眼睛说：就是那个座位。
Looking directly into my eyes, she said, that seat.
她指了指。
She pointed.
她指向的是我胸口正中央，我的心口。
She was pointing to the center of my chest, to my very heart.
嗯，我就坐在这儿。
Well, I'm sitting here.
我终于开口了。
I managed, finally.
仿佛我是她那个上大学的女儿，突然宣布自己成了素食者，她耸了耸肩，带着一种自我沉溺的宽容，放过了我对存在方式的幻想，然后走开了。
As if I were her college age daughter who had suddenly announced that I was a vegetarian, she shrugged in a kind of suture self indulgence of my fantasy of existence and moved on.
我沿着座位一行行看过去，想找点笑声、翻个白眼表示同情，或者至少有人确认一下刚才真的发生了什么，但我什么回应都没得到。
I looked up and down the row for some sort of laughter, some eye rolling commiseration, or just plain corroboration that this had just happened, but I got no response.
直到今天，我依然无法解释这件事。
To this day, I cannot explain it.
难道她是那个时节从天而降的使者，不是来宣告上帝之子的降生，而是用天启证明我彻底的微不足道？
Was this an emissary sent from on high at that time of year, not to trumpet the birth of the son of god, but to proclaim with heavenly proof my complete and utter insignificance?
她说得对，我想。
She's right, I thought.
这个座位没人坐。
This seat isn't taken.
那正是我人生那个阶段最完美的时刻。
It was the perfect moment for that time in my life.
我的意思是，当然，这是最糟糕的那种完美。
I mean that, of course, in the worst way possible.
剧院陷入了黑暗。
The theater went dark.
屏幕上，镜头掠过自由女神像的巨大特写，俯冲而下，捕捉到斯塔滕岛渡轮在水面上疾驰，载着我们的女主角前往她的办公室工作——我们早已知道，她将取得胜利，击败刻薄的上司，并赢得那个男人的爱。
Up on the screen, the camera zoomed past a huge close-up of the Statue Of Liberty, swooping down to find the Staten Island Ferry scudding along the water, transporting our working girl to her office job where we already knew she would triumph, vanquish the harpy boss, and win the love of the man.
希拉教给我一种生存技巧，帮助我度过那些看似难以忍受的时刻：冗长的午餐、关于态度或时间管理的严厉训斥、被困在会议室里那个办公室猪仔旁边、面对着纸杯蛋糕等等。
Sheila taught me a survival technique for getting through seemingly intolerable situations, interminable lunches, stern lectures on attitude or time management, being trapped by the office boar beside the sheet cake in the conference room and the like.
保持眼神接触，面无表情，像面具一样，只微微带着一丝笑意。
Maintaining eye contact, keep your face inscrutable and mask like with the faintest hint of a smile.
尽可能长时间地保持这种状态，就在你觉得自己即将崩溃，想拿起拆信刀刺进某人的脖子时，把双手叠放在腿上，像修道院里虔诚祈祷的人一样，一只手嵌在另一只手中。
Keep this up as long as you possibly can, and just as you feel you're about to crack and take a letter opener and plunge it into someone's neck, fold your hands in your lap, one nestled inside the other like those of a supplicant in a priory.
现在，用内侧手的食指，在另一只手的掌心上极其隐蔽、不易察觉地写下：我恨你。
Now with the index finger of your inner hand, write on the palm of the other, very discreetly and undetectably, I hate you.
我恨你。
I hate you.
我恨你。
I hate you.
在你假装倾听时一遍又一遍地写。
Over and over again as you pretend to listen.
你会发现，这会让你的神情自然流露出兴趣和愉快的投入。
You will find that this brings a spontaneous look of interest and pleased engagement to your countenance.
根据需要继续并重复此动作。
Continue and repeat as necessary.
在剧院的黑暗中，我用力在手掌的皮肤上写下我的话语。
In the dark of the theater, I write my message pressing hard into the flesh of my hand.
虽然我不知道自己在写给谁，但我只庆幸能感受到疼痛。
Although I don't know who I'm writing to, I'm just glad to feel that it hurts.
谢谢。
Thank you.
大卫·拉科夫把他版本的故事写进了他的第一本书，名叫《欺诈》。
The way David Rakoff, he put a version of the story into his first book, which is called fraud.
接下来，菲利普·格拉斯、斯派克·李和史蒂芬·霍金坐在一起，随意聊聊，你知道的，任何话题。
Coming up, Philip Glass, Spike Lee, and Stephen Hawking sit around and have a casual conversation about, you know, whatever.
马上从芝加哥公共电台传来，我们的节目将继续。
That'll be the day in a minute from Chicago Public Radio when our program continues.
这是艾拉·格拉斯的《美国生活》。
It's American Life from Ira Glass.
每周，我们的节目都会选择一个主题，为您呈现围绕该主题的多种不同类型的故事。
Each week in our program, of course, we choose some theme, bring you a variety of different kinds of stories on that theme.
今天的节目是很多很多年前的重播。
Today's show is a rerun from many, many, many years ago.
办公室政治，我们国家职场中的高潮戏剧。
Office politics, high drama in our nation's workplaces.
我们来到了第三幕，第三幕，那个让你摆脱街头生活的任务，如今却摆在了街头。
We've arrived at act three, act three, when the job to get you off the streets is on the streets.
那时在纽约市格林威治村的第六大道和第八街交汇处，几乎每天你都会看到人行道上摆着桌子，由一些衣着邋遢的男人看管。
So it was a time in New York City at 6th Avenue and 8th Street in Greenwich Village where pretty much any day you would see tables on the sidewalks manned by scruffy looking men.
如今，像这样的桌子只剩下寥寥几处了。
These days, there's just a handful of tables like this.
但在2000年代初，当我们首次制作并播出这一期节目时，这些摊位绵延两个街区，一个接一个，售卖杂志和书籍。
But back in the early two thousands, when we first made this episode and put it on the air, the tables extended for two blocks, one after another, selling magazines and books.
这些杂志和书籍大多是从垃圾桶里捡来的。
Most of those magazines and books have been pulled from the trash, found in dumpsters.
朱莉·斯奈德报道了这一特殊生意背后的政治生态。
Julie Snyder reports on the politics of this particular business.
在第六大道和第八街的街角待了几天后，让我印象深刻的是，街头贩卖与其他生意并无多大不同，反而极其相似。
After spending a couple of days on the corner of 6th Avenue and 8th Street, what strikes me is not how different street vending is from other businesses, but how similar.
仿佛商业的规则早已深植于我们心中，只要有人在任何场合开始售卖任何东西，公司里的规则和等级结构就会自然而然地形成，哪怕他们卖的只是别人的垃圾。
As if the rules of business are so deeply encoded in us that as soon as anyone starts to sell anything in any setting, the rules and hierarchies of a company start to gel around them, even if what they're doing is selling other people's trash.
在街角，你有底层从业者，也有那些辛勤打拼、一步步爬到顶端的人。
On the corner, you've got your entry levels, and you've got the people who have worked and clawed their way to the top.
伊什梅尔·沃克大致就是这样做的。
That's more or less what Ishmael Walker did.
我去拜访时，他拥有整条街最好的位置，就在巴诺书店正前方的街角。
When I visit, he has the best spot on the block, right on the corner in front of the Barnes and Noble.
让他走到这一步的，仅仅是简单的雄心。
And what got him there was simple ambition.
曾经有一阵子，我在街区另一头坐着，心想：天啊，所有的钱都在上面，所有人都在上面。
At one time I was down the block and I was just sitting out and I said, damn, all the money is up there and everybody up there.
你看，那家书店，人们进去买书，对吧？
So see, that bookstore, people go and buy books, right?
我桌上也有书，有杂志，我可能正好有他们想要的东西。
And I got books on the table, I got magazines, I might just got what they want.
Ishmael想要这个角落还有其他原因。
There are other reasons Ishmael wanted the corner.
正对面是Grey's Papaya，一家有落地窗的热狗店，可以直接看到这个角落。
Right across is Grey's Papaya, a hot dog restaurant with plate glass windows that looks directly on the corner.
天下雨时，他可以坐在里面吃饭，同时还能照看他的东西。
When it rains, he can sit inside and eat and still keep an eye on his stuff.
此外，Ishmael桌子正前方还有一个小凹处，他那里放了一把椅子，白天可以休息或小睡。
Also, there's a small alcove that's right in front of Ishmael's table where he keeps a chair and can relax or nap during the day.
要理解你是如何占据街区最好的位置，或是如何被贬到最差的位置，不妨看看罗恩的故事。
To understand how you rise to the best space on the block or how you get demoted to the worst, consider Ron's story.
我曾经告诉过你，我一度掌控了从路灯到路灯的整条街区。
I told you one time I had this whole block from the light post to the light post.
那是我刚来这儿的时候。
This was when I first came out here.
罗恩位于街区的最末端，这可以说是整个街区最差的位置。
Ron's at the very end of the blocks in what is arguably the worst location.
多年前，在伊什梅尔搬去顶端之前，罗恩掌控着整个街区，包括现在伊什梅尔所在的地方。
Years ago, before Ishmael made his move to the top, Ron controlled the entire block, including the area where Ishmael is now.
我之所以能掌控这条整条街区，是因为我当时就住在这里。
Now how I got control of this whole block was that I was living here.
我就住在人行道上。
I was living right here on the sidewalk.
根本没人能抢在我前面占到这个地方。
There was no way anybody was gonna get here before me.
你明白吗？
You understand?
我以前就睡在那边。
And I used to sleep over there.
我和几个其他家伙以前就睡在那边。
Me and and a few other guys used to sleep over there.
我把我的东西打包放进一个垃圾桶和邮局的箱子，然后推到那边去。
I packed my stuff up in a dumpster, post office thing, and I would push it over there.
你明白吗？
You understand?
如果我想，我可以24小时都待在那儿。
If I wanted, I could be up 24 if I wanted to.
第六大道上超过一半的人都无家可归，所以他们更容易带着自己的东西，留在街上守住自己的位置。
More than half the guys on 6th Avenue are homeless, so it's easier for them to stay with their stuff and keep their spaces on the street.
最终，罗恩搬去哈莱姆区和他姑妈一起住了。
Eventually, Ron moved in with his aunt in Harlem.
他失去了对这块地的控制，现在赚的钱比伊什梅尔少多了。
He lost control of the block and now he doesn't get as much business as Ishmael does.
他远离了所有热闹的地方。
He's away from all the action.
但对罗恩来说，这已经不值得了。
But it's just not worth it to Ron anymore.
因为我不会整晚待在外面占位置。
Because I'm not gonna stay out here all night to hold out a spot.
我现在有地方住了。
I got a place to live now.
你明白吗？
You understand?
我晚上收拾好东西就回家。
I'm gonna pack my stuff up at night and go home.
你明白吗？
You understand?
罗恩刚开始在这里的方式，就是所有人的起步方式。
The way Ron started here is the way all the guys start.
他曾是个乞丐，但你很难让这些摊贩承认这一点，因为大多数摊贩都对自己的乞讨经历感到羞耻。
He was a panhandler, but you're lucky if you get any of the guys to admit that because for the most part the vendors are embarrassed about their panhandling pass.
与此同时，乞丐们瞧不起摊贩，认为他们太有尊严，不屑于贩卖别人的垃圾。
The panhandlers meanwhile look down on the vendors saying they have too much pride to sell someone else's trash.
罗恩回忆起乞讨的日子，只觉得无比屈辱。
Ron remembers panhandling as just being humiliating.
我以前在第九街那边乞讨。
I was like panhandling over there on 9th Street.
我记得有一天，我走向了我的小舅子。
And I remember one day I walked up to my brother-in-law.
我没有主动走过去找他。
I didn't walk up to him.
我当时在乞讨，背对着人。
I was panhandling like my back was turned.
他走过来，我转过身说‘给点零钱吧’，结果是我姐夫。
And he he walked up, and I turned around and said, been some change, and it was my brother-in-law.
他看着我，说他还有老婆孩子要养。
And he looked at me like, said I got a wife and kids to support.
然后他就继续走了，你知道的。
And he kept going, you know?
有一次我真的很尴尬。
And one time I was really embarrassed.
那次我在一份工作上干活。
This time I was working at this job.
我当时做时间记录员，挣得不少钱。
I was working at this job as a timekeeper and was getting good money.
但我最终还是辞了那份工作，因为，你知道的，我喝酒。
And I I end up leaving that job because, you know, of my drinking.
其中一个同事，我和她关系不太好，是个女孩。
And one of the workers one of the coworkers that I didn't really get along with that good was a girl.
她有个男朋友。
And she had a boyfriend.
她男朋友是新泽西的一名警察。
Her boyfriend was a police police New Jersey cop.
我记得有一天我在市中心乞讨，她走过来，看着我，好像很惊讶。
And I remember one day I was panhandling uptown, and she walked up and she looked at me like she was real startling.
她和那个男人在一起，我记得那次我真的很尴尬。
She was with the guy and, you know, I remember I was really embarrassed that time.
所以，我很高兴自己能开始做点更体面的工作。
So I'm I'm actually glad that I was able to to start bending, which is, you know, more respectable.
当你在街角待着的时候，看起来会有二十到三十个男人围着桌子，好像只是闲逛什么也不做。
When you spend time on the corner, what it looks like is there'll be 20 or 30 guys all around the tables, and it seems like they're just hanging out doing nothing.
但事实上，他们每个人都有各自明确的工作、不同的职责和薪酬等级。
But it turns out they all have and distinct jobs with different responsibilities and pay scales.
有一些占位者会在人行道上过夜，占着位置，然后在早上卖给小贩。
There are placeholders who camp out overnight on the sidewalk holding a space that they sell to vendors in the morning.
通常报酬在20到30美元之间。那些被称为存储提供者的人，会在自己的公寓里、地铁轨道下方或空置的仓库里提供存放空间，向摊贩收取每晚7到10美元的费用，用来存放他们的桌子和杂志箱。
That usually pays around $20 to $30 Guys called storage providers have places in their apartments or under the subway tracks or in empty store rooms where they charge $7 to $10 for the vendors to keep their tables and crates of magazines during the night.
搬运工帮助摊贩把货物搬上搬下人行道。
The movers help the vendors haul their stuff on and off the sidewalks.
他们每搬运一次通常能赚5到10美元。
They generally make $5 to $10 a move.
如果你明天出现在第六大道想入行，即使你有高中或大学学历，即使你有其他工作经验，你也得像以前所有人一样从底层做起，才能最终成为摊贩。
If you were to show up on 6th Avenue tomorrow to start in the business, even with a high school or college degree, even with other job experience, you'd have to work your way up same as anyone before you'd make vendor.
当社会学家米奇·德尼尔来到这条街采访摊贩时，他最初几个月只能帮大家买咖啡、做些杂活，之后才获得了自己的摊位。
When sociologist Mitch DeNierc came to the block to write about the vendors, he was first put to work getting coffee and helping out in little ways for months before getting his own table.
他最终与这些摊贩相处了多年。
He ended up spending years with the vendors.
不是任何人都能出来摆个摊子。
Not anybody can come out here and set up a table.
你必须一步步在体系内往上爬，因为街上合法的摊位数量是有限的。
You have to, work your way through the system because there's only a certain number of legal spots on the street.
城市对摊位数量进行了限制
The city regulates how many spots there
所以有些人在早上出现，他们的全部工作就是当搬运工。
can And
所以有些人在早上出现，他们的全部工作就是当搬运工。
so some guys show up in the morning and their whole job is just to be a mover.
事实上，康拉德就是从这里开始的。
And in fact, that's how Conrad got started out here.
他最初只是一个搬运工。
He was originally just a mover.
现在他，你知道的，升到了拥有自己的摊位。
And now he, you know, moved up to getting his own table.
还有很多人的起点是当摊位看守者，整晚看守摊位，而其他人去睡觉，或者在别人去洗手间时看守摊位。
And there are many people who start out as table watchers, watching a table all night while someone else goes to sleep, or watching a table while people go to the bathroom.
而且，你知道，他们中的一些人有一天可能会拥有自己的摊位。
And, you know, they may wind up having their own table one day.
米奇把我介绍给了第六大道上的每个人，并解释说，过度吸毒基本上是让这些人都来到这里的原因。
Mitch introduced me to everyone on 6th Ave and explained that excessive drug use is pretty much what brought all of the guys out here.
大多数情况下，一个人在人行道上的位置与他们的成瘾程度相关。
Most times a person's position on the sidewalk correlates to their level of addiction.
如果你大量吸食快克可卡因且不太可靠，那么当个占位者可能是你能得到的最好工作了。
If you smoke a lot of crack and aren't too trustworthy, a place placeholder is about the best job you can get.
如果你比较清醒，那你很可能是个常驻桌位看守者或小贩。
If you're pretty clean, you're probably a regular table watcher or a vendor.
因此，人行道上形成了不同的小圈子，乞丐和小贩之间也存在相互的鄙视。
So there are clicks on the sidewalks and mutual snobberies between the panhandlers and the vendors.
但就像任何工作场所一样，也有人会避开这些琐事，无视那些政治关系。
But like in any workplace, there are people who sidestep those trivialities, ignore the politics.
BA 就是这样一个人。
BA is one of those people.
注意看扁桃体。
Watch the tonsils.
我觉得这儿有个女士。
I think there's a lady here.
对吧？
Right?
有些
Some
有人说BA代表坏态度，但BA更喜欢‘业务管理员’这个说法。
people say the BA stands for bad attitude, but BA prefers business administrator.
这个头衔对他很贴切，因为他是第六大道上的一个流动性人物，是少数几个一天之内频繁换工作的人之一。
It's an apt title for him because he's sort of a floater on 6th Avenue, 1 of the few guys who jumps from job to job during the day.
今天下午，BA在看桌子。
On this afternoon, BA is table watching.
他同时还为一个叫乔的摊贩占着旁边的位置，乔是个年长的白人，卖一些稀有且绝版的书，但只在周末来人行道上摆摊。
He's also placeholding a space next to him for a vendor named Joe, an elderly white guy who sells rare and out of print books but only comes to the sidewalks on weekends.
除此之外，每天下午四点，他还会去PATH地铁站去乞讨。
And then on top of all of that, at four in the afternoon most days, he goes down to the PATH Train Station to Panhandle.
但今天他不去了。
Though today he is isn't going.
是的。
Yeah.
我那儿有个人替我做事。
I got somebody down there working for me.
在车站？
At the train?
对。
Yeah.
那个PATH地铁站。
The the the PATH Train Station.
如果你去不了，就付钱让人替你去，然后
You pay somebody to go down there for you if you can't go and then
他们下来的时候会付钱给我。
They pay me when they come off.
他们付钱给我。
They pay me.
因为你那里也有个位置吗？
Because you have a spot down there too?
是的。
Yeah.
他们占用了我的时间。
They take my time.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I'm saying?
我的时间段是四点到六点。
My time is from four to six.
对吧？
Right?
所以如果他们想占用我的时间，我就告诉他们，给我一半。
So if they wanna get on my time, I tell them, give me half.
他们可以在四点到六点之间去那里。
They can go down there for four to six.
给我一半。
Give me half.
所以现在，你在火车站那边赚钱。
So right now, you're making money down at the at the at the train station.
而且你现在在桌上也在赚钱。
And then you're also making money right now on the table.
当然。
Of course.
我就是这样做的。
That's that's how I go.
然后你今晚还会为乔明天占位子而赚钱。
And then you'll also make money tonight by holding the space for Joe for tomorrow.
明白了。
Got it.
如果有人从四点到六点下去乞讨，你根本不认识他们，他们也没给你钱，你会怎么做？
What would you do if they went if somebody like just went down there from four to six and started panhandling and you didn't know them and they didn't pay you.
这难道不可能吗？
Like, isn't that possible?
不可能。
No.
不可能。
No.
他们必须走。
They got to go.
因为我会在凌晨三点三十分去检查我的地盘。
Because I go, like, 03:30, and I'll check out my spot.
你明白我的意思吗？
You know what I'm saying?
我每天凌晨三点三十分就出去。
I go out at 03:30.
我去确保一切都没问题。
I go make sure everything is clear.
我是说，我会去安顿下来，把我的箱子放好，把杯子准备好。
I'm saying I go set myself up, put my crate down there, get my cup ready.
我跟他说我的衣服看起来像个流浪汉。
I tell him my clothes look like a bum.
等等。
Wait.
尽管可能会让无家可归者倡导者不舒服，但我还是要确认你听明白了。
At the risk of making homeless advocates cringe, I wanna make sure you caught that.
现在，BA穿着盖普的Polo衫、卡其裤和阿迪达斯鞋。
Right now, BA is wearing a polo shirt from the Gap, khakis, and Adidas.
但当他去潘哈特时，他说他会换上衣服，让自己看起来像个流浪汉。
But when he goes down to Panhandle, he says, he changes his clothes to look like a bum.
我换了衣服，让自己看起来像个流浪汉。
I changed my clothes to look like a bum.
你换衣服是因为你现在看起来真的很不错。
You changed your clothes to look like because right now you look really nice.
就是这样
That's what
我说的。
I said.
我跟你说过我得去换衣服什么的。
I told you I had to go change and everything.
你得下去乞讨，然后你穿什么？
You have to go down and go panhandling, then what do you
穿什么？
wear?
我会穿上我的工装裤之类的，换双鞋，你知道的，弄点灰尘，弄脏我的衣服，搞得破破烂烂的，类似那样。
I'll put on my overalls or something, change my sneakers up, you know, just dusting something, dusting on my dude ragged, something like that.
你知道的，我坐下来，看起来就像个无家可归的人。
You know, I sit down and just look homeless.
两小时内你能挣到多少钱？
And in two hours, how much can you get?
大概六到八十美元。
For 60 to $80.
嘿，Shorty，你这些宝贝是从哪儿弄来的？
Hey, Shorty, where'd you get those baby for?
是的。
Yeah.
那个盒子是什么？
What's the boxy?
在角落里，Ishmael的朋友Shorty乘出租车来到人行道上，下车时手里提着几个纸板箱。
At one point in the corner, Ishmael's friend Shorty pulls up on the sidewalk and gets out of cab carrying several cardboard boxes.
有人清理了公寓，给了Shorty一堆旧书。
Someone had cleaned out their apartment and given Shorty a bunch of old books.
你呃哦。
You Uh-oh.
哎呀。
Uh-oh.
你那里头有点东西。
You got something up in there.
大家围过来评估这些书。
The guys gather around and evaluate the books.
大多数书看起来都很旧，书名都没人听说过。
Most of them seem pretty old with titles nobody's ever heard of.
但有几本是知名的畅销书。
But there are a few known sellers.
哦，看这里。
Oh, look over here.
你在哪里提交《保姆俱乐部》？
Where do you submit the babysitter's club?
《保姆俱乐部》。
The babysitter's club.
这些都能卖，兄弟。
These are sell, bro.
卖书或杂志的人根本不懂这些。
A person on sale books or magazine don't know nothing about it.
有些
Some
这些家伙中，有些人已经认识二十多年了。
of these guys have known each other for over twenty years.
在80年代中期，他们曾一起住在宾州车站，直到城市清理了那里。
In the mid-80s, they lived together in Penn Station before the city cleaned it up.
经过坐牢和参加康复项目后，这些人又在第六大道重新聚在一起。
After time in jail and treatment programs, the guys regrouped on 6th Avenue.
他们之间的关系很亲密，和他们待在一起很舒服。
And they're close in a way that makes it nice to hang out with them.
他们互相开玩笑，会有些小争执，持续一两天就过去了。
They joke around, they get into little arguments that last a day or two and then blow over.
这些价格都很不错，朋友。
These are all good prices, my friend.
Papa Toby's 和 Christie's 多少钱？
How much are Papa Toby's and Christie's
披萨？
pizza?
我每本一美元卖给你。
I'll give you a dollar a piece on them.
这些可是好价钱。
A good deal for those.
从下午四点左右开始，人行道上的人越来越多，音响的音乐声也越来越大，所谓的黄金时段开始了。
Starting around four in the afternoon, the sidewalks start getting busier, the music gets turned up on the stereos, and what's known as the power hour begins.
每个摊位大约摆了150到200本杂志。
Each table has about a 150 to 200 magazines laid out.
卖家们有《Vogue》《Vibe》《GQ》《Martha Stewart Living》《Architectural Digest》。
The sellers, Vogue, Vibe, GQ, Martha Stewart Living, Architectural Digest.
还有一些外国时尚杂志，比如意大利版《Vogue》，偶尔也有特殊订单。
There are foreign fashion magazines like Italian Vogue and the occasional specialty order.
因为我我得到了
Because I I got
现在有个女孩想要德鲁·巴里摩尔的《花花公子》特刊。
a girl right now, she wants Drew Barrymore Playboy issue.
她说在网上，他们要价60美元。
She said on the on the on the Internet, it's they they asked me $60 for it.
这本杂志我以前卖过好多次了。
I done had that book many times.
我现在正在等它到货。
I'm waiting on it now.
我就定价35美元。
I'm a just charge it $35.
《失败者》？
The Losers?
任何周刊杂志，比如《新周刊邻居》经常会把一堆周刊杂志，像《人物》这样的，捐赠给摊贩。
Any weekly magazine, The New weekly Neighbors will often donate stacks of weekly magazines, like People, to the vendors.
摊贩们为了礼貌会收下它们，但之后会悄悄地扔掉。
The vendors will take them just to be polite, and later, quietly throw them away.
看起来色情内容卖得最好，而且同性恋色情刊物的库存出人意料地多，但大家都对此表现得非常自然。
It seems that smut sells the best and there's a surprisingly large stock of gay porn that everyone is completely matter of fact about.
事实上，整个氛围都很放松，没人会严肃地坐在街区顶端的黄金摊位上。
In fact, it's all pretty relaxed, no hard sitting in his premium spot at the top of the block.
有一次，一位出租车司机——伊什梅尔似乎以前跟他打过交道——把车停在摊位旁，问伊什梅尔有没有电脑书籍或软件。
At one point, a cab driver, who Ishmael has apparently dealt with before, pulls up next to the tables and asks Ishmael if he has any computer books or software.
是的。
Yeah.
它们在哪儿？
Where they are?
就在这儿，整个摊位，所有东西都在这儿。
They right there, the whole session, the whole food.
出来到出租车这边。
Come on out to the cab.
你得从出租车里出来，到桌子这边来，兄弟。
You gotta get up out of the cab and come on by the table, bro.
出租车司机不愿意离开他的车，车停在纽约市繁忙街道的一条车道中间。
The cab driver is reluctant to leave his cab parked, sitting in the middle of a lane of traffic on the side of a busy New York City street.
你得出来。
You gotta come on out.
你得站起来，过来。
Gotta You get up at it.
我们不会再像上次那样出事故了。
But we ain't gonna have that accident no more like we did last time.
那张罚单。
That ticket.
我不是想让你看那些书，伙计。
I don't that want you to see the books, man.
我来付这个钱。
I'll pay for that.
伊斯梅尔成功让出租车司机离开车子，来到桌边。
Ishmael actually gets the cab driver to come out of his cab and to the table.
他以10美元的价格卖出了这本计算机书籍。
He sells the computer book for $10.
现在我不明白你怎么能那样看。
Now I don't understand how you're gonna see like that.
绕着桌子走一圈很好。
It's good to go around the table
你可以看到前面有什么。
and you can see what's in front.
让伊斯梅尔登上顶峰的，正是让人在任何生意中登顶的东西。
What got Ishmael to the top of the block is pretty much what gets someone to the top of any business.
他只是更想要而已。
He just wanted it more.
当他最初在人行道上开始时，有个叫斯科蒂的人坐在书店角落。
When he first started on the sidewalk, there was a guy named Scotty sitting at the corner by the bookstore.
所以以实玛利制定了一个计划。
So Ishmael made a plan.
他说他待在室内休息了一周，为对付斯科蒂做好了准备。
He says he stayed inside and rested up for a week and got ready to make his move on Scotty.
所以那天来了，他还没出现。
So the day come, he didn't come yet.
我的桌子就在里面。
So my tables is in there.
下一秒，他就来了。
Next minute, here he come.
天哪。
Oh, boy.
我连续三天早上都奋战了。
I fought for three morning, three days straight.
对吧？
Right?
身体上的打斗。
Physically fighting.
桌子在街上，漫画书在街上，书在街上。
Tables in the street, comic books in the street, books in the street.
他把他的踢到街上去了？
He kicked his in the street?
他踢了我的，我也连续三天踢回去，每天早上8点到下午11点左右。
He kicked mine and I kicked it for three days straight, 08:00 to about 11:00 in the afternoon morning.
当米奇第一次把我介绍给艾什梅尔时，米奇说他一生中很少遇到像艾什梅尔这样有决心的人。
When Mitch first introduced me to Ishmael, Mitch said he'd met few people in his life with the determination that Ishmael has.
我知道，通往胜利的道路居然是每天早上花三小时揍对手，这听起来很奇怪，但如果可口可乐和百事可乐也能这么做，你不觉得他们会做吗？
And I know it's weird that the path to triumph will be kicking the ass of your opponent for three hours every morning, but if Coke and Pepsi could do the same thing, don't you think they would?
艾什梅尔，我见过你在零下30度的天气里，凌晨三点到四点的时候。
Ishmael, I have seen you in 30 below zero weather at 03:00 04:00 in the morning.
我见过你在别人都离开的时候，依然守护着这片地方。
I've seen you preserving this space out here when everybody else was gone.
没错。
That's right.
因为就像他们说的，鬼魂会在夜里出现，
Because it's like the the the they they said, the ghost come out at night,
你知道的。
you know.
如果你不在，
And if you're not
相信我，肯定有人会趁机钻空子。
there, believe me, somebody is willing to slip up in there.
天气好的日子，人多的时候，Ishmael一天能赚大约150美元，但他一周七天都工作。
On a good day, when the weather's nice and lots of people are out, Ishmael makes about a $150, but he works seven days a week.
但很多日子都会下雨。
And a lot of days, it rains.
朱莉·斯奈德是我们首次播出本期节目时的高级制片人。
Julie Snyder was the senior producer of our show back when we first broadcast today's program.
她后来共同创立了《Serial》播客。
She went on to co create the serial podcast.
感谢米奇·德尼尔为我们讲述这个故事。
Thanks to Mitch Denier for acting as our guide to this story.
他所著的这本书，记录了摊贩们数年的生活，书名为《人行道》。
His book, documenting several years in the lives of the vendors, is called Sidewalk.
这本书后来被改编成了一部同名纪录片。
That book became a documentary film with the same name.
米奇至今仍每隔几个月就去探望这些摊贩。
Mitch still visits the vendors every few months.
BA和Shorty已经去世了。
BA and Shorty have since passed away.
Ram被驱逐到了牙买加。
Ram was deported to Jamaica.
但伊什梅尔仍然在附近逗留。
But Ishmael still hangs around the neighborhood.
他现在已经退休了。
He's retired now.
当人们开始在地铁上用手机，不再购买书籍和杂志来阅读时，第六大道的摊贩们受到了沉重打击。
When people started looking on their phones on the subway and stopped buying books and magazines to read there, the vendors on 6th Avenue took a big hit.
今天感谢莫妮卡·霍尔和克里斯·尼里。
Thanks today to Monica Hall and Chris Neary.
本重播节目的制作协助来自迈克尔·科梅特、莫莉·马塞洛、斯通·尼尔森和瑞安·拉默里。
Production help on this rerun from Michael Comete, Molly Marcello, Stone Nelson, and Ryan Rummery.
《美国生活》由PRX（公共广播交换平台）提供给公共广播电台。
American Life is delivered to public radio stations by PRX, the public radio exchange.
一如既往，感谢我们节目的联合创始人托雷·马拉蒂亚先生。
Thanks as always to our program's cofounder, mister Tore Malatia.
你知道吗，当斯派克·李走进托雷和我、菲利普·格拉斯以及史蒂芬·霍金中间时，就会发生这种事。
You know, when Spike Lee walks in on Torey and me and Philip Glass and Stephen Hawking, this is what happens.
他走进来时，会跟另外四个人打招呼，却完全无视我，好像我根本不存在一样。
He would walk in and say hello to the other four and just, like, ignore me like I wasn't there.
我是埃里克·格拉斯。
I'm Eric Glass.
下周再带来更多《美国生活》的故事。
Back next week with more stories of This American Life.
我在工作呢，姑娘。
I'm working, girl.
下周在《美国生活》播客中，一辆满载乘客的巴士开往华盛顿特区，但司机却不想去那里。
Next week on the podcast of This American Life, a bus full of people going to DC, only the driver doesn't wanna go to DC.
他想去哪儿就去哪儿。
He's gonna go wherever he wants.
那乘客们呢？
And the passengers?
一群直到现在才彼此陌生的人？
Strangers who never met till now?
没有什么比一个叛逆的人更能让人团结一致了。
Nothing like one rogue person to make everyone else unite.
你知道的。
You know?
对吧。
Right.
接下来发生了什么？
What happens next?
下一个故事就像电影《生死时速》的现实版，下周在本地公共广播电台的播客中播出。
A real life version of the movie Speed Next week on the podcast on the local public radio station.
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