阻碍你的三件事——Ken Coleman

根据我自己的经历和走过的路，我把阻碍进步的因素归结为三个讨厌的小怪物：恐惧、怀疑和骄傲。

From my own journey and then from my own path, I have boiled down the enemies of progress to three nasty little monsters, fear, doubt, and pride.

这三个敌人绝对能把一个人从他们的道路上打下来。

Those three enemies can absolutely knock a person off of their path.

但如果你知道它们长什么样，它们会对你说什么，那你就能做好准备，并且有证据告诉它们，它们错了。

But if you know what they look like and what they're saying to you, then you can be prepared for them and have the evidence to tell them that they're wrong.

我们来看看这些阻碍进步的因素。

Let's walk through these enemies of progress.

恐惧是第一个。

Fear is number one.

对未知的恐惧和对失败的恐惧，是我每天在肯·科尔曼节目上听到来电者提到的最大的两种恐惧。

Fear of the unknown and fear of failure are the two biggest fears that I hear from callers every day on the Ken Coleman show.

我可以告诉你，在我自己的经历中，正是对未知的恐惧让我在起跑线上停滞了两年半。

And I can tell you my own journey, it was the fear of the unknown that kept me in the starting blocks for two and a half years.

对未知的恐惧。

The fear of the unknown.

为什么？

Why?

嗯，如果我们不知道该怎么到达某个地方，或者不知道这是否可能，那感觉就像我们要航行到地球的尽头，然后从海洋边缘直接掉下去。

Well, if we don't know how we're gonna get somewhere or we don't know if it's even possible, it just seems like maybe we're gonna sail to the end of the earth and drop right off the edge of the ocean.

想想看。

Think about it.

对未知的恐惧是最大的恐惧。

The fear of the unknown is the greatest fear.

你甚至无法开始考虑前进，因为你根本不知道该往哪里看，或者至少感觉是这样。

You can't even begin to process moving forward because you don't even know where to look or that's the way it feels.

那对失败的恐惧呢？

And then how about the fear of failure?

经济上的失败，在朋友和家人眼中的失败，那些你认为在你生活中最重要的人。

Financial failure, failure in the eyes of your friends and family, those that you consider to be the most significant voices in your life.

对失败的恐惧非常揪心。

Fear of failure is gripping.

这让我们回到了小学时代。

This takes us all the way back to elementary school.

第一次被挑到某个队伍，要在众人面前做点什么的时候，对失败的恐惧简直让人动弹不得。

The first time maybe we get picked on a team where there's an opportunity to do something in front of people, the fear of failure is absolutely debilitating.

对未知的恐惧，还有对失败的恐惧。

The fear of the unknown and the fear of failure.

咱们先聊聊怀疑这个问题。

Let's talk about doubt for a second.

怀疑。

Doubt.

在我自己的生活以及打进电话来的听众生活中，我听到的最大的怀疑声音是：我真的具备成功的条件吗？

The biggest voice of doubt that I see in my own life and in the lives of others as they call in is, do I have what it takes?

我们怀疑自己真的能把这件事做成。

We doubt that we can actually pull it off.

我们会非常清楚自己应该去做。

We'll be really clear that we should do it.

我们知道为什么应该做，但随后就开始怀疑。

We know the why behind the should, but then we begin to doubt.

我具备这个能力吗？

Do I have what it takes?

我有这个技能吗？

Do I have the skill?

我有耐心和毅力吗？

Do I have the patience, the perseverance?

我有运气吗？

Do I have the favor?

不管是什么，我们开始真正质疑，我能做到吗？

Whatever it is, we begin to really question, can I pull this off?

另一个大的疑虑是你觉得自己没有时间。

Another big doubt is you don't think you have the time.

你觉得时间不够。

You don't think there's enough time.

哦，这话我经常听到。

Oh, I hear this all the time.

我没有足够的时间。

I don't have enough time.

现在做这件事太晚了。

It's too late in life to do this.

我没有足够的时间。

I don't have enough time.

对自己能力的怀疑，对自己素质的怀疑。

The doubt in your abilities, the doubt in your quality.

你看，能力就是技能。

See, ability is skill.

素质就是坚持和耐心。

Quality is the perseverance and the patience.

就是那种坚持下去的毅力。

The intestinal fortitude to stay with it.

这就是我们怀疑的地方。

This is what we doubt.

我不知道自己有没有那个本事。

I don't know if I've got what it takes.

我是说，我有天赋。

I mean, I have the talent.

就算我有天赋，我也不确定自己能不能扛得住这段旅程。

If I do have the talent, I don't know if I can withstand the journey.

然后，当然，我没时间。

And then, of course, I don't have time.

每个人都觉得自己时间不够，但我们却把一天、一周、一个月甚至一年的那么多时间浪费在琐碎的事情上。

Everybody thinks that they don't have enough time, and yet we spend so much of our day, our week, our month, and even our years wasting time on trivial things.

最后，是骄傲。

Finally, pride.

我们太在意别人的看法了。

We're so worried about what others think.

现在我明白朋友和家人的想法，也理解他们的观点，但这影响远不止于此。

Now I understand friends and family and and their points of view, but it extends beyond.

我们身边的邻居、孩子同学的父母、社交圈里认识的人，如果我们想迈出那一步，比如创业或者转行，就会特别在意别人的看法。

People that we do life within our neighborhood, the parents of our children's friends, people that we are seeing socially, if we step out, start a business, or we step out and we transition into a different career, we're so worried about what everybody else thinks.

不管是大学老师、牧师还是祖父母，都是我们在意的人。

Our college professor, our pastor, grandparents, whatever it is.

哪怕心里清楚自己该勇敢尝试，我们还是太在乎其他人的评价了。

We are so worried about everybody else's opinion even when we know that we should step out and do something.

还有另一个体现骄傲的地方，就是我们不愿意开口求助。

And then the other area of pride is we just don't wanna ask for help.

我们不想让人觉得自己是无助的。

We don't wanna be seen as helpless.

这不是很奇怪吗？

Isn't that interesting?

然而，正因为不愿意寻求帮助，我们反而几乎变得真的无助了。

And yet by not being willing to ask for help, we almost become helpless.

如果没人知道我们需要帮助，他们怎么可能帮到我们呢？

If nobody knows that we need help, how could they possibly help us?

所以我们不想显得无助，但我们会表现得无助。

So we don't wanna seem helpless, but we'll act helpless.

各位，这是骄傲在我们生活中带来的一个非常大的障碍。

Folks, this is a major, major obstacle that pride brings up in our life.

嗯，他们很忙。

Well, they're busy.

他们有更重要的事情要做。

They got more important things to do.

对，他们确实很忙，也确实有更重要的事情要做，但人们还是会愿意帮你。

A, they are busy, and yes, they do have more important things to do, but people will still help you.

骄傲让我们说不出“你能帮我吗？”这句话。

Pride keeps us from saying, will you help me?

其次，当别人帮助我们时，有时候我们不愿意接受。

And then secondly, when someone helps us, sometimes we won't receive it.

他们会说，我来帮你。

They'll say, I'll help you.

他们会告诉你该怎么做，但我们就是不去做。

Here's what you need to do, and we won't do it.

这就是骄傲。

Pride.

那万一我没做好他们交代的事呢？

Well, what if I don't do a good job with what they...

或者万一他们帮了我，结果却不尽如人意呢？

Or what if what I want from them, they help me with it doesn't turn out?

他们会怎么想？

What are they gonna think?

这就是个恶性循环。

And it's just this vicious cycle.

恶性循环。

Vicious cycle.

那现在我们知道了进步的敌人是谁，该怎么办呢？

So what do we do now that we know who the enemies of progress are?

恐惧、怀疑和骄傲。

Fear, doubt, and pride.

我给了你们两个例子。

I gave you two examples.

还有更多。

There are more.

在你自己的生活中，你应该看看，嘿。

And in your own life, you should look, hey.

我在哪里看到恐惧在阻碍我？

Where do I see fear holding me back?

我在哪里看到怀疑在阻碍我？

Where do I see doubt holding me back?

我在哪里看到骄傲在阻碍我？

Where do I see pride holding me back?

当我们知道是恐惧、怀疑和骄傲在阻碍我们时，我们就必须打赢思想和心灵的战斗，因为思想和感受结合在一起会拖住我们。

When we know that it is fear, doubt, and pride that are holding us back, we have to then win the battle of the mind and the heart because the thoughts and the feelings combine to hold us back.

那我们来说说恐惧吧。

So let's take fear.

如果你害怕未知，这让你停滞不前，那该怎么办？

If you are afraid of the unknown that's holding you back, what do we do?

去找答案。

Go get answers.

去把那些你还没回答的问题的答案找出来。

Go and get answers to the questions that you've yet to answer.

我可以告诉你，这就是简单的解决办法。

I can tell you, that's the simple solution.

害怕失败。

Fear of failure.

嘿。

Hey.

不如你去了解一下你敬佩的那些人，做点功课怎么样？

How about you do a little bit of homework on people that you admire?

读读他们失败了多少次。

Read about how many times they failed.

看看他们的其他采访。

Read other interviews.

听听别人讲失败的采访。

Listen to other interviews of people of failure.

读读关于失败的书。

Read books on failure.

开始习惯失败是进步的一部分，因为事实就是如此。

Start to get comfortable with failure being a part of progress because it is.

再看看怀疑。

Let's look at doubt.

怀疑最大的声音就是：你不行。

Big voice of doubt is you don't have what it takes.

等等，先别急。

Well, wait a second.

回头再看看。

Go back and look.

你有天赋吗？

Do you have the talent?

你培养了技能吗？

Have you developed the skills?

你有想做的意愿，那种强烈的渴望吗？

Do you have the want to, the deep desire to do it?

如果答案是肯定的，那你确实具备条件。

If the answer is yes, then you do have what it takes.

看看时间这个因素。

Look into the time equation.

哦，等一下。

Oh, wait a second.

实际上要花多少时间才能达到资格？

How much time will it actually take to get qualified?

要花多少时间才能入门，然后可能一步步往上爬？

How much time will it take to get in and then maybe move up the ladder?

去找到答案，然后我们来看看自尊心的问题。

Go get the answers, and then let's look at pride.

我们害怕开口求助。

We're afraid to ask for help.

人们愿意帮助那些乐于助人的人吗？

Do people wanna help helpful people?

是的。

Yes.

那些谦逊的人，那些有渴望的人。

People that are humble and people that are hungry.

那些真正会利用得到的帮助去做事的人。

People that will actually do something with the help they've been given.

大家都愿意帮别人。

People want to help other people.

只要你问得恰当，并且真的去行动，以后你开口求助时，大家还会继续帮你。

And if you ask the right way and you act on it, you'll continue to get the help when you ask for it.

所以我们要做的，就是审视那些来自恐惧、怀疑和骄傲的声音，问问自己：这是事实，还是谎言？

So what we do is we begin to look at the voices of fear, doubt, and pride, and we is this true, or is it a lie?

我们去获取知识。

We go get knowledge.

我们把谎言揭穿。

We expose the fact that it's a lie.

然后我们专注于真相，改变心态，也改变行动。

We focus then on the truth, and we change our mindset, and we change our actions.

各位，我跟你们说件事。

Folks, I'm gonna tell you something.

这个简单得不能再简单的道理是：其实有三个基本的阻碍进步的因素。

This simple, simple little truth that there are really three basic enemies of progress.

如果你抓住这一点，开始把它应用到生活中，盘点一下恐惧、怀疑和骄傲在哪些地方阻碍了你，然后像对付那些讨厌的小怪物一样去攻击它们，并且战胜恐惧、怀疑和骄傲，看看会发生什么。

If you grab this and you begin to place it in your life and do an inventory of where you see fear, doubt, and pride holding you back, and you begin to attack them like the nasty little monsters they are, and you win the battle over fear, doubt, and pride, watch what happens.

你会取得令人难以置信的成果和突破，而比突破更重要的是，你会建立起一种稳定的表现水平，最终让你实现你深知自己生来就要实现的目标。

You will have unbelievable results, breakthrough, and more importantly than breakthrough, you'll create a consistent level of performance that will ultimately allow you to achieve the purpose that you know you were created to achieve.